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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/7/2009 11:33:38 AM | Kpooks - you have said it all in one sentence...thanks
I have herpes, truth be told, probably had it for years (since my 20's), the little critter went dormant for many many years, and then showed up about 4 years ago - I was devastated, contacting my ex's, including the man I was going to marry were some of the hardest phone calls I have ever made, thank the Lord none of them have it.
I got it because I was irresponsible - plain and simple.
Since finding out I have been very cautious about dating...trust me, before I found out I would have immediately ruled out anyone who had herpes...funny how life works out...But there will be "the talk" before a piece of clothing is removed, he will be informed and be able to make HIS decision - my gut tells me that more often than not the phone calls and e-mail will cease after this, but my conscience will not allow me otherwise.
I have only glanced through some of this thread, so the following may be redundant:
1. If you have a sore and a sample is taken and comes back negative, don't start yelling hallelujah just yet, MOST do come back negative - have blood work done as well - that will confirm
2. Valtrex - I take it only when I have breakouts, but make no mistake about it, while it is "less likely" to spread when you don't have symptoms, still a virus - make sure to "cover up" everything down there
3. Ointments, colonics, herbal medicine, yoga, etc., etc., etc. - not a cure...wish it was 
I guess all I can say is that if you meet someone, and you do like them, and you want to get to know them better, and they say "Guess what, I have something to tell you".....it may send you running to the hills (can't say I blame many, dating is tough enough as it is) but as I said, if you HONESTLY do like them, read up on it, get information, be informed, make your decision based on your research | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/7/2009 11:50:12 AM | God forbid if tuberculosis or Spanish Flu or leprosy ever makes a big comeback.
I see anarchy in the streets.
I am not a big fan of taking chances with herpes but I think we should be over the accusation/stigmatism stuff.
I recommend a movie called "Blindness".....Mark Ruffalo and Julianne Moore are in it.
A contagious disease causing blindness takes root......and society's reaction is one of the themes of the film.....good movie. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/7/2009 12:11:25 PM | | Dont think so.I believe in true love but I also believe in not having genital herpes.There are millions of guys out there that are as good or better than him.Alot of guys use the quote,I was drunk and didnt know what I was doing.Bull sh*t.I have been really drunk but I have aways known what I was doing!Also think if you get with him and it doesnt work then you have herpes.So think really hard about this.Herpes last a life time,some men dont. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/7/2009 1:03:54 PM | If singles aren't being cautious or at least informed about the potential risks associated with STD's and STI's...that isn't for anyone here to facilitate.
This is a PUBLIC forum, what people on here "facilitate" or not is out of your control. Get over it.
Remember, it isn't the majority of people who have it but a minority.
It depends on which type you are referring to. Genital HSV which is in the title of this thread....yes, those who have that type are a minority. However, 80% of the population does in fact have HSV-1, that's the majority of us. Those are the facts. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/7/2009 2:27:56 PM | | so you guys were seeing each other (long distance) and planning a summer trip...and he sleeps with a stripper...and your worried about marrying a guy with herpes? Umm is sleeping with strippers ok? Seems to me you are ignoring that he supposedly loves you so much he did some random stripper. I dont much care how committed you were at the time...i dont think i would risk my health with a guy who gets loaded and sleeps with strippers. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/9/2009 12:22:29 PM | So, judging from those here who say they do not have Herpes, have you ever had a IG type specific serology (blood test which accurately types Herpes) done? It is NOT available at all in Canada, so unless you went to the states, or paid to have your Doc get it tested there, you have NOT had it done.
HSV, HPV and HIV are NOT standard workups in an STD test and must be requested separately!! Are you really sure you are so unclean...
HSV1 /cold sores on the mouth are HERPES! You can get it from oral sex.... just ask me... and because 90 % of the North American population may have either HSV1 or HSV2 I think that 90% with the potential to give someone else genital Herpes is spot on... unless you never have sex or oral sex... (it takes ONCE)
The virus can remain dormant for years. It can also be shed even though you have never had an outbreak that you are aware of, so you may be the one spreading Hrrpes, not me ....as I know, tell, protect.
So those of you who do not have Herpes (or think you don't) and Ewww, and ick and think we are unclean, will YOU be the ones who say they will kill themselves once they do contract it and be the drama that you tease the OP of creating.
It is less innocuous then recurring acne or eczema... if you are hygenic and knowledgable and stay healthy and know your triggers, but the kicker is the social stigma... that red neck ignorance and fear that is the REAL problem with having Herpes. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/9/2009 12:32:54 PM | Wow. Just wow. I didn't waste time reading 7 pages, but I sure did waste time reading some of the posts I read. I see the disease posse is alive/well. Statisticians R Us I think. 
So, judging from those here who say they do not have Herpes, have you ever had a IG type specific serology (blood test which accurately types Herpes) done? It is NOT available at all in Canada, so unless you went to the states, or paid to have your Doc get it tested there, you have NOT had it done.
HSV, HPV and HIV are NOT standard workups in an STD test and must be requested separately!! Are you really sure you are so unclean...
HSV1 /cold sores on the mouth are HERPES! You can get it from oral sex.... just ask me... and because 90 % of the North American population may have either HSV1 or HSV2 I think that 90% with the potential to give someone else genital Herpes is spot on... unless you never have sex or oral sex... (it takes ONCE)
The virus can remain dormant for years. It can also be shed even though you have never had an outbreak that you are aware of, so you may be the one spreading Hrrpes, not me ....as I know, tell, protect.
So those of you who do not have Herpes (or think you don't) and Ewww, and ick and think we are unclean, will YOU be the ones who say they will kill themselves once they do contract it and be the drama that you tease the OP of creating.
It is less innocuous then recurring acne or eczema... if you are hygenic and knowledgable and stay healthy and know your triggers, but the kicker is the social stigma... that red neck ignorance and fear that is the REAL problem with having Herpes.
Thank you ~ saved me an opposing Disease Posse post. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/9/2009 3:21:25 PM | Message 22 has got it. Think
I highly doubt this was a stripper thing. Great excuse though, you bought it.
He probably has been sleeping around and that just "sounds" like BS.
If he is already admiting that, get him checked. May be some other things floating around.
I also agree an STD is not the biggest issue here. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/9/2009 4:35:37 PM | Finding out you have herpes really screws up your world. But once you educate yourself and get over being pissed at the person who gave it to you it is not too difficult to deal with. However in the dating world it is like having three heads.
One thing to consider from the carrier's point of view is that it feels lousy to know you have given this to someone. My waswife always felt bad about giving it to me even though she did not know. I have a young friend who gave it to his wife and he feels like a mass murderer every time she has a little irritation. She is pregnant and with all the other things going on she is afraid of giving it to her baby and that makes him feel bad.
If you or anyone would like to talk about herpes please feel free to ask in private. Do not put me on your favorites list. I will not try to date you unless you have herpes or want it really, really bad. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/9/2009 6:26:46 PM | yeah, I agree that's a hell of a drama you have goin' on there , girl.
I don't know about others' , but as I was reading it, I totally lost focus on the STD part.
well, again, education , education, and what else...oh yeah, don't do it...with anyone. Ever ! Hows that?
As usual, it depends how deep your love is for someone. Many things are workable, I would imagine.
Frame it another way....90% of all humans have the HSV1 herpes virus....i.e. cold sores.
35% have the HSV2 herpes virus....i.e. cold sores in the 'nether'lands.
And, since people probably do a hell of a lot more kissin' than fcukin',
would you throw away a human you love because they have a cold sore every now and again.? Maybe some would, I imagine. Seems oddly narcissistic though.
HelI, I don't want any of this stuff......but, you know, if I had to have it, I'd rather get a pimple on Mr. Weeney , where no one could see it, than blisters all over my lips and face every now and again.
It's probably similar to anything...trauma, cancer, stroke, disability, disfigurement......
If you love someone. truly love someone....you deal with it.
I couldn't see throwin them away like a used paper towel.
That seems rude.
However, you have a lot of other stuff in the mix here we should be talkin' about though, dontcha think, OP?
cheers
Kimbo*********************************** | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/9/2009 7:16:18 PM | | If it were me a relationship would be out of the question now that he has herpes. Why? Because I don't want it nor would I want to possibly pass it onto a kid if you happened to get knocked up by him. By all means be friends with him but honestly you'd have to be pretty stupid to put yourself in a situation where you could potentially get herpes from him. Some peoples answer may be a "condom" but the truth of the matter is that they have been known to break. With that being said it's not worth the risk. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/9/2009 11:26:55 PM | no one is acting on here. 20-25% of the population has HSV2. But 90 % has herpes, period. Type 1 can be on the mouth or genitals and vise versus. What the hell is the difference if type 1 is on your lip or genitalia? Or type 2 is on your mouth and not genitals? Its still Herpes. Herpes is herpes is herpes. 90% of us has it. Doctors do not differentiate between the 2, they are so much alike. It isnt in the standard STD testing regimen, because it is so prevalent.
I have had cold sore on my mouth since I was maybe 10 years old. I have an outbreak maybe every other year, usually brought on my sun, or stress. I can feel it a couple of days before it actually appears. But even before I feel it, I can infect someone with it. Whether it is on their through kissing them, or on their genitals( woops, ladies dont talk about that in public). IT DOES HAPPEN. If you have herpes type 1 you can give that to someone through oral sex. It is still Type 1. You can get a cold sore after performing oral sex on some one, have it appear on your lip and it is still herpes. Maybe he has type 1 on his penis. Maybe she has type 2 on her mouth. either type can go either place. Though each isnt as complicated when they are out of their origin.
90% of us has herpes, whether it is on your lip or you genitals. It is still herpes.
Now, doesnt everyone feel absolutely dirty now?
DENIAL< DENIAL< DENIAL.
Talk to your doctor, he will tell you how ridiculous this thread really is. | |
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Jay631
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Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 164 | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/10/2009 5:33:28 AM |
Though each isnt as complicated when they are out of their origin.
90% of us has herpes, whether it is on your lip or you genitals. It is still herpes.
Now, doesnt everyone feel absolutely dirty now?
DENIAL< DENIAL< DENIAL.
Are you not the same person who claimed that one could "catch" aids?
You do the field a disservice by spreading such nonsense.
A simple search on the topic provides enough evidence alone. As a nurse you should be ashamed of yourself for spreading such nonsense. And if the way you've behaved on this forum alone is evidence, then your bedside manner must be deplorable. You should never tell a person that they should accept any disease. Aids is a combination of many diseases cause by the disruption of T receptor cells, by the HIV virus. The virus never kills. The lack of an immune system make the person susceptible to a number of opportunistic infections, pneumonia one of the main culprits. If a person has AIDS they can transfer the virus. Not the conditions. And seeing as many Aids patients die of penumonia, and pneumonia isn't contagious; well I am sure you see where I am going with this.
Where did you graduate from again? | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/10/2009 12:37:35 PM | I think my twisted words were twisted around before. When you are infected by another person, their blood, or semen, needles, body fluids and get HIV, it culminates into AIDs..
Mr. Wiggen:
What I am saying isnt nonsense. Go ask your doctor how prevalent herpes is. The information I have written here can be found on any reputable medical site, or herpes support pages.
I was saying 90% of us has herpes. And yes, we may as well accept it, because ignorance and denial is why it is spreading.
I dont see you arguing with the ones who say "there is a cure" or "use a condom", both are useless, since there is no cure and condoms dont cover the intire perineum.
From what you are writing, about AIDS, HIV, you do realize this topic is about HSV, dont you? Herpes Simplex Virus?
Dont you for one second worry about my bedside manner. There comes a time, with a lot of patients, you have to lay it on the line, make them make an effort, and be knowledgeable about their problems. Everyone should be educated about their diagnosis, and medications. How is it I should behave? Let them lay in bed all day and cry about their situation, or encourage them to get up and do something about it?
My diploma say University of KY, And oh my, it has that honors seal on it.
I personally could care less what you think of me. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/10/2009 8:56:02 PM |
I personally could care less what you think of me.
Thanks for letting me know after you went out of your way to prove otherwise. Andrew is my Christian name. You can refer to me as Ender. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/11/2009 7:16:04 PM | Thanks for letting me know after you went out of your way to prove otherwise. Andrew is my Christian name
I am really tired of people like yourself who are on a dating site, say they are here for the forums and then proceed top browbeat and berate others. You are also forum stalking the poor lady . Your post 168 is spam and it is offensive and childish, as well as off topic.
What is yourPHD doing here, pray tell? Tring to make your little fishie look bigger? I don't mean your brain)
The topic is Herpes and her post was right on. Methinks thou dost protest too much. Got a bunch of mouth sores that you pass off as Cankers and Cold Sores and don't like that we call a spade a spade and tell everyone they are really Herpes sores? | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/11/2009 9:12:07 PM | | Yes. They are big and greasy. Want a kiss? I am pretty sure she can handle herself. then again, some people need reassurance, under the facade of assistance. Brow beating and berating? I am pretty sure I saw her do that the second she insinuated that all strippers, or even most are diseased, when they are no different, actually probably more clean than the average bar skank you meet here in the states. Furthermore, all she did was reiterate what several other poster had already said. Stop being mean and defensive and accusatory for no reason. This is a place for adults. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/11/2009 11:34:30 PM | I didnt say "that all strippers, or even most are diseased, when they are no different, actually probably more clean than the average bar skank you meet her in the states"
The stripper in question had unprotected sex. My post was "The stripper had unprotected sex. She didnt care that she gave him herpes, and Ive known a few strippers, prostitutes, who intended to inflict everyone they could, with the diseases that will ultimately kill them."
I doubt very few have experienced an Aids patient, so mad at the world they try to scratch, spit on, bite, and have sex with anyone, to intentionally infect others. Or have come across the guy who had unprotected sex with the hooker who had it. They are mad at everyone. They have the mind set they were infected and plan to infect or hurt others as they hurt, that they are not going to die alone. Imagine a prostitute with Hep or Aids out there having unprotected sex. She may as well be carrying a gun.
You are the one being mean a accusatory. You are just in denial that the cold sore you get on your lip is in fact herpes, regardless of the type, it is still herpes, and you can self inflict your own genitalia. Your the one being nasty.
There is another thread about herpes, Genital Herpes, on this site, that a dermatologist with 30 years experience, takes the time to try to educate the public, pages 17 to 30 of the thread. It also has an army physician putting his imput in. Yet a couple of posters actually think they know more than the Doctors. It is denial. With 90% having herpes, and it doesnt matter which type, they both can be both places, these people are in denial. I dont care if you only had 1 cold sore when you were a child. It is herpes, and you now carry the herpes virus, and can pass it on the others. 90% do. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/12/2009 4:39:42 PM | | My love didn't tell me. At least he told you. Now hes out there spreading herpes. I asked him the last time I saw him if he told his new gf he had herpes he said no. Why wasn't I surprised. Its sad. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/23/2009 8:12:07 PM | | take it from my knowledge, once you have herpes it rairly shows its face. You can live a perfictly normal life with it. most times forgetting you have it. it does not effect your health in any way. don't need pills everyday to maintain it either, the trick to keeping it dormant is keep you immune system high, eat well and take care of yourself and it eventually probably becomes like you don't even have it. | |
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| What if the love of your life has genital herpes?
Posted: 6/23/2009 8:15:29 PM | | covering up doesnt stop it, if someone has cold sores on there mouth and there open durring oral sex, genital herpes can result. Even tho the person with cold sore DOESN"T have herpes. | |
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