| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/21/2008 9:14:26 AM | | i have added people to my favorites because something attracted me to thier profile with the intention of contacting them when i next saw them on line then when i IM i get user chose not to respond, why then do they not remove themselves from my favorites. That being said my favorites list is really quite small and if someone adds me and i like what i read i usually thank them and let them decide if they want to contact me , if not oh well | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/21/2008 9:22:32 AM | | Actually all these quotes are all from her and she was who I was addressing. Perhaps I should have made it more obvious but I assumed it was rather apparent. I have, nor ever had any intent of causing any ill sentiments here. | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/21/2008 9:50:34 AM | Don't worry Bit - I'm not offended 
I just wish you could have quoted me a bit more accurately/completely. 99% of my statements were in fact *I* statements -thereby expressing personal opinions. Not so different from the previous post by the other girl.
It's OK to have a different opinion to others -that's what makes us human! As "What" mentioned not everyone can be confident and outgoing, others are shy and slightly more timid...what a boring world this would be if we were all the same!
If I'm to be judged harsh because I enjoy the company of confident people (in all areas of my life) then I'm alright with that. | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/21/2008 10:58:20 AM | To each their own.
I, for one, just remove everyone when I have been added as a favourite and I don't add anyone as a favourite either. My thinking is somewhat akin to Alluria's - if you want to contact me, go ahead and do it or move on. Putting me on your favourites list doesn't tell me anything. In the past, I used to send a note (making first contact) - not once did I receive a reply. Pretty silly if you ask me!
When I first joined this site it seemed to me that some individuals "bragged" about how many people had them listed as a favourite and it seemed too much like a game playing competition.
I view myself as being a confident, assertive woman with a wonderful, active life and I don't really enjoy spending time (my time or anyone else's) trying to guess and figure out what is the intention in any given situation.
I have read some of the posts about how men and women view the favourites "thing" but I disagree. Some men I have become acquaintances with don't always view it the same way as described.
I think we are all individuals, with the right to decide for ourselves what things mean to us.
I don't know about anyone else but I have my own "turnoffs" when I have been contacted on this site and I do make my own judgements about people.
Personally, I get turned off by anyone that contacts me and immediately requests or at times DEMANDS that I send them a picture of myself before they even contact me with anything to say. This turns me off them faster than the speed of light and I do judge them (whether anyone else deems it right or wrong) as a sign of being shallow (in my opinion).
Not much different that those individuals that sort out potential relationships in a myriad of other ways including this topic.
The thing about being on a site such as this one in addition to being regular person walking around in the world - people will develop opinions about you based on your behaviour. I do it, Alluria has stated that she does it, many others on this topic do it and it is my belief that pretty much everyone in the world does it - like it or not.
Hey, the favourites button is just a tool. Any, tool, in the hands of a person that uses it appropriately can be used to create something great. | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/21/2008 1:33:10 PM | I know it's been said before but I add a lady as a favorite as sort of a wink or smile. If they in turn view my profile I then say hello.
I used to say hi right away when I saw a profile I liked but got frustrated without so much as a courtesy thanks but no thanks!
Thomas | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/21/2008 1:43:49 PM | My apologies if I have offended. It was not my intent. I generally agree with you but your choice of weak minded and the use of courage just would not sit well with me. I was aware that your comments were refering to you but I found that statement to be harsh not you. As you siad "It's OK to have a different opinion to others -that's what makes us human! As "What" mentioned not everyone can be confident and outgoing, others are shy and slightly more timid...what a boring world this would be if we were all the same! " I totally agree.
As talawah said, "Hey, the favourites button is just a tool. Any, tool, in the hands of a person that uses it appropriately can be used to create something great." Sums it up nicely. | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/21/2008 11:36:17 PM | | If I'm interested I will add someone. If they add me I will send a message. I had someone add me, I added him and then I sent him a message. He's been on since (more than once) but he hasn't read my message. Kind of a curious thing that. Bite the bullet already! I'm a nice girl!!! | |
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Tessav
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Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 109 | |
| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/21/2008 11:43:14 PM | I get the adding to keep you in view until they are ready, for whatever reason, to contact you.
I get adding you as a 'wink' to see if you 'wink' back.
I get that some people are to shy to, or are prevented by restrictions from, e-mailing you and they hope you will contact them.
I don't get someone adding you then ignoring your message.
Anyone got an explanation for this one?
(BTW smiliegirl, I'm off to check out your profile but your picture and the posts I've read lead me to believe that you are a lovely girl. He must've thought so too if he added you to his favorites. Boys are weird!  ) | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/22/2008 3:38:07 AM |
I don't get someone adding you then ignoring your message. That one's kinda baffling, yeah. All I can possibly fathom would be
The only thing that hadn't occurred to me was the possibility of death...lol. and lets hope thats not the case. I know, I know, I shouldn't joke about such things. (But whaddaya expect. Sometimes us guys are just a tad weird)   | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/22/2008 4:31:21 AM | | hey tyme4akewiching(whew i hope i got that rite) thee IM must be working when they send back " user chose not to respond" if nothing happens then i mark it down to not working altho in all honestly i hardly ever try anymore | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/23/2008 10:55:15 AM | lol
diesel
i can read through ur mistakes..and won't beat u too badly for miss spellings..in fact...not at all....
forums are supposed to be fun right..and I really don't have time to pull out my red marker and correct spelling errors..besides..it makes a mess of my screen!!
i had to no clue it said 'user choose not to respond!'...hmm....ah sigh..just another way of being ignored!!??
ah..it's all good!
(psst..what the heck are u doing up at 5:30 am on a sat??) | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/23/2008 12:53:44 PM | I thought I would put my two cents in here too......I have to agree with some of you...I too, add men to my favorites as a wink....seeing if in turn they would maybe send a message.... but alas............................. it does not seem to work to well....... oh well.... we just have to say that those people that don't take the hint to message us, or choose to not respond or demand a picture right away when they do answer a message and then once you send a picture they judge you on your looks and never message you again or read/delete or even worse unread/delete the message you sent .....well all we can say is THEY DONT KNOW WHAT THE HECK THEY ARE MISSING!!!
And after all aren't we all on here to make friends and hopefully make a connection with someone.....so I don't understand why ppl are so uptight and do the things they do..... have a great day...!!! | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/23/2008 5:10:49 PM | Over time, I've pretty much become numb to this whole listing process. When I first came here, I viewed it much like lava's "hot list"; thus, I've certainly been guilty of this add/no contact behaviour. With that said, I'd have to say that ever since I've been here, approx 96% of those who favorite me, never say a word. To judge their reasoning for doing such seems like a rather rediculous waste of energy to me. Every thread I've ever read on the matter seems to expose that there are infinite reasons why people do it. I truely only pay attention to it when the numbers climb too high for my liking and I fear that those peering in upon my profile may get the wrong impression due to my appearing on so many peoples lists. As per responding to e mails, I once vowed to answer all in the name of good karma. However, after having a string of bad responses to my polite thanx/no thanx responses......my doing , or not doing so is now, more often dependant upon factors such as my mood, how I'm approached, how chaotic my state of daily life is, etc. rather than simply to appease karma lol. For those I've never responded to......... don't take it personal   | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/23/2008 8:30:43 PM | | The most simple answer is simply they think you are attractive/inticing, want to talk to you but simply are not ready or are afraid of what the outcome is going to be... not sure why anyone would be afraid when it's ONLINE but i'm sure it happens. | |
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| why do people add you to their favorites and never contact you?
Posted: 11/23/2008 8:58:48 PM | I quite often forget to check and see who may have added me to their favorites list - I think if they are interested enough, they will generally contact me
I like to at least send a message to those in my favorites list - it may take a while though - sometimes I will add a person then contact a little later when I have the time to actually go through their profile again and send a note that shows I paid attention
as to why you would get added, and message someone and not get a return, I have no idea - but there are many that seem to not answer message when they are sent | |
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