| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/8/2007 8:08:14 PM | Well, restrictions are a bummer aren't they.
Gurus are some of the most interesting people I have ever met, but in a mission not on the streets. There they are just like anyone else. But the resemblence can still be seen. The tend to veg a lot. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/16/2007 5:24:26 AM | | well this topic i find funny because on line at first it always seemed that ppl did not want to talk to an east indian guy, i know a loy of guys come on here or orhter sites and say i am west indian just so ppl dont run, the things that gets me is when a girl will talk to you and say you dont say east indian, listen ladies to all of you who think so not every east indian sounds like APU FROM THE SIMPSONS, i mean i am a paki, ( thats right i can say paki) born and raised in scarb, but i am still me, i i like curyy but i dont smell like it, i speack the language but i dont have an accent, so all i am saying is open your eyes there are more of us othere that you like then you think !! | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/16/2007 7:28:44 AM | | next all the complaints you seem to have, are not with east Indian men, but with men, someone said , east Indian men don’t respect women, do we have a monopoly on that so there has never been a white who treated is girl or wife bad, then another said that we just want white girls to f u c k but don’t want to take you home, so a black guy never dated a white girl and then after married a black girl, then some stated they want to date you even after they get married in another country, so apparently adultery is and only occurs with and is exclusive to east Indian men ! that’s a joke, your prob ladies is with for the most part men, the east Indian part is just preference, do you like brown skin if so then holla if not then no worries we are not going to cry just don’t waste are time ! | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/16/2007 8:50:39 AM | debrownguy - You have raised some excellent points in your last message and I completely agree with you. Women over here do tend blame their unwillingness to date an East Indian guy because of so called reasons such as our so called bad attitude towards women, or that we want to just f u c k white women but marry our own kind etc etc...when in reality the unwillingness comes completely because of the way we look and/or our cultural heritage.
Basically they disguise their true reason by using big phrases like "mistreating women" "abusive to women" etc etc. When in reality I too have seen so many white women jump at the first chance to get into bed with a white guy even though that white guy is known to be a complete a s s h o l e and masoginist. You see it is "Cool" to date a black or Hispanic guy these days but for some reason dating an East Indian or Asian guy is some what tabboo. Okay I am certainly not saying that all white women are like that because I have certainly dated a good amount of really nice and great white women but I must say that there are lot of those who are completely racist towards East Indian guys but cleverly disguise it with foolish double standards. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/16/2007 10:17:55 AM | I dated an East Indian man a few times, but he was religious, and I am not.....so after trying to change my views unsuccessfully we didn't speak any more. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/16/2007 12:40:58 PM |
I am originally of East Indian deccent but have been here in the United States all my life and am completely Americanized in every single way.
What do most women here feel about dating a guy of East Indian heritage? Are they somewhat reluctant because we are not one of the major minority races - - i.e. Hispanic, Black and Asian
Sweetie pie, if somebody knows fundamentals of indian culture to some extend, that would scare a girl for sure. In Indian culture, men are considered to be superior to women, and they girl cannot say no to her bf/husband nor to his families, and I suppose you know that very well. however as you have mentioned that you are completely
am completely Americanized in every single way.
I would definitely date you, no question. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/22/2007 5:30:00 AM | This topic set me thinking as I tend to do occasionally!
lol....we have a fair sized Indian community in Britain and they are doing pretty good in terms of education,business,family etc etc. They are highest achievers in those feilds along with white Irish (yup....I found it amazing) and Chinese,next is white British . Blacks are bottom of that particular table .
I find they (Indians )marry/date each other but recently they are with whites .11 % of Indians here are with/married to whites according to the census. I think they actually choose to marry within their own community.But for those women who say that Indian guys mistreat women etc etc.I am no expert on this but i would imagine they are no different than any other man on that and I will tell you that I think they may mistreat you less than you may have been mistreated already.
If you look around you.................I see hundreds of white women as single mothers of kids all colours of the rainbow....usully black or white.No man to be seen but a kid left behind.
Is that part and parcel of our wonderful culture?
I know of a white girl who had 3 kids by a black man then 2 by a white man and she has never worked a day in her life and has had public funds rained on her.Another had 4 kids with a black man before he returned to the USA and then 1 by a white man who then scarpered.No marriage,no child support,no nothing and this is apparent acrooss this country.
It is EXTREMELY rare to see an Indin woman in this situation or a white girl put in this situation by an Indian.
Sooooooooo you......date who you like ladies but this crap of Indians mistreating women as part of the culture.........when our own culture shows that some women,large enough to make a large impact on the national census of 30 % have been rubbished,abused and left holding the babies far too often for their silly condemnation to be taken seriously. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/22/2007 5:52:08 PM | OP - I like to think of myself as being fairly open-minded and I've dated interracially before. Race is always of secondary consideration to me. However, your post got me thinking. Whether I like it or not, I have to admit that I can be a bit more guarded initially when approached by an East Indian man online.
There is a relatively large Indian population where I grew up, so I went to school with lots of Indian guys. Naturally, they're just like everyone else who grows up in Canada - largely "Americanized," some good, some bad, some indifferent. However, sometimes their families were very traditional - to the point where some guys had to hide their non-Indian friendships/relationships from their families. Others just avoided interracial relationships completely so they wouldn't have to deal with their family's disapproval. I also encountered many who had very "traditional" attitudes about women themselves, and these guys tended to band together (literally) and were often extremely aggressive. Obviously they weren't the only people like that in high school, but their domineering attitudes and disrespect could be extremely intimidating at times - particularly for the girls they'd make comments about as they passed in the hallways. I'm also skittish initially with "jocks" for the same reason. I believe the expression is "once bitten, twice shy."
I don't know how many other people are the same way, but I am a little more cautious around some "types" of people than others just because of a few unpleasant experiences. However, I'm always ready to give anyone the benefit of the doubt, because I know that those individuals are not representative of the majority of people out there.
If other women are experiencing similar uncertainties (for whatever reasons), then I imagine the whole thing is accentuated because we're interacting online. It is so much more difficult to get a real reading of someone online than it is in person. Like you said, you have no trouble in person, but online is another beast. It just takes longer for people to get a feel for who you really are. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/23/2007 12:37:42 PM | Well- i have dated an east indian before and he was cool-------I knew we wouldn;t ever go any further, as he HAD to marry within his race!
I don;t date east indian now because of that, I mean, I would have loved to be with him for a long time -----we got along great, I couldn;t meet his family or friends because I was native and he was indian--LOL----------------!
so when I get messaged by an east indian, i don;t respond for that reason------- i found that they have a high regard for their parents expectations, which may include marrying within their culture------so why waste my time and feelings, just to be let down!
JMO | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/23/2007 1:45:44 PM | Okay, you asked. This is only in lil Sunny's head and is brought to you by Nabisco.
Don't pick on me for answerin' honestly, after all...you wanted to know, so here's my take on it....
The only East Indian men I have known were the typical hotel/motel owners here in Oklahoma and Texas. So maybe it's not a true representation of all East Indian Men, but I don't intend to nor do I pretend to have dated every East Indian man. But I have been friends with a few and I can tell ya this....one....word....CURRY.
Their body sweats the stuff ! Seriously, ya'll...they ate so much of it seeped out their pores and actually made my eyes burn. I can't help it, ever'time I see a profile that describes a man as Indian, that's what immediately comes to mind and my nose starts runnin'.
So...there ya go....simply Sunny. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/23/2007 2:21:31 PM |
I am originally of East Indian deccent but have been here in the United States all my life and am completely Americanized in every single way.
What do most women here feel about dating a guy of East Indian heritage? Are they somewhat reluctant because we are not one of the major minority races - - i.e. Hispanic, Black and Asian?
After living in the USA for "all" of your life,I'd think that you'd have a far better answer to your own question than you can get from a forum question/survey on POF just from the valume of years of LIFE experience. Also, allow me to correct the supposition that (1)East Indian is a "race". It is NOT under the most widely used system of racial classification. Neither is Hispanic. The same can be argued of "Black and Asian".Race,and racial classification is a concept at least in its most widely used form is based upon antiquated and scientifically and genetically unsupportable theory we all should get away from using.
My own opinion on your question; (although NOT a woman and NOT East Indian) is that you have a better idea just from your own interaction over the course of your life than you can get from the question on POF. Some women in the USA are intelligent enough to understand that individual is the MAJOR factor rather than "race" or better put ethnicity, since a man(or woman) of ANY ethnic heritage who is "completely Americanized" (whatever the heck that means or entials) is likely to do whatever and be whatever to "fit in" with the majority. If THAT is what someone likes that is what they get from a "completely Americanized" person. On the otherhand, in the USA often stereotypes abound(both favorable and unfavorable) and some people are too ignorant to see through stereotypes to individual. Again, I suspect that you've viewed this from life experiences. I actually think its BEST to RETAIN many ethinic cutural values and costums that are REASONABLE, as they add FLAVOR to the American Pie and actually HELP to find an intelligent person who is open to the adventure of SPICE. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/23/2007 3:40:51 PM | LOL this thread is funny.
First thing first I think we Indian should be called by the old school term, Aryan, that would probably confuse a lot of people these days.
Secondly, I don't recall any one in my family having such "men are superior than women" attitude. I would also say that a percentage of my family are/have been in a interracial relationships and marriages.
However it appears that some people experiences have been different. It all depends on the individual in the end I suppose and the enviornment they were brought up in.
Then again peoples beliefs have never stopped me.
Buena Suerte. (yes I speak other languages)
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/24/2007 3:12:50 PM | Hi missus...sunny texas..lol
Every ethnic group has smells pecular to them but just because you know of one or some guy like this smelling of curry doesn't mean to say they do 24/7
Theres loads of Indians here and I don't smell that but there again chicken tikka or Indian food is very popular here be you working class or high class. Prince Willian eats Indian food to name just one person.
lol
Anyway....I like Indian girls...most people do here and no....sorry the majority do not smell of anything but all things nice....sugar and sweet.
Going back to the topic where someone said about Indian guys standing in groups.Well....you get hoodies standing in groups.We get East Europeans standing in groups.We get Africans standing in groups.What does that mean?
Nothing.
But if you look and see....you dont see Indians here causing a big single parent population.In fact they have the lowest single parent population.The lowest crime rate.The lowest prision population.The lowest school exclusion rate.
They have the highest rates for marriage,2 parent families, home ownership,higher education as in university and business ownership.
Of course......if you call that being awkward.......then its your problem.You can't however say that the culture is wrong in anyway.It may be foreign or alein to us to have these same values but those values are pretty much straight down the line.
PS-the stuff I have quoted can be verified by our census .Too tedious to post but thats the upshot.
Funny thing is....you may meet one guy who smells of curry so.......thats it but you may see other ethnic groups responsible for the most crime,the highest prison population,the highest single mother and multiple partners reputation by as much as 60% but thats where we all bang on................oh......that is racist or it can be anybody or stop stereotyping.
We can sweep 60% of something negative away but can label something thats 100 % positive.
Its plainly a matter of choice but the fact is......our culture is way off the mark as to be unable to judge others. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/24/2007 3:54:14 PM | nicktomlinrhys, I absolutely agree with what you said about guys standing in groups. My example only referred to a specific experience I had with certain Indian guys who banded together and made very inappropriate comments to girls as they walked by. I did say though that they weren't the only people who behaved that way. This particular group just happened to be particularly vocal. I am very aware that not all Indian guys are like that. I wouldn't even say that most are.
Also, the awkwardness I referred to just stemmed from the unwillingness of particular families to accept members of other ethnicities into their households. I personally experienced this most frequently with Indian families, but not all Indian families were like that. I have had some Indian friends who themselves said they found it difficult being friends with people of other ethnicities because of pressures from home. But the same awkwardness arises any time your family doesn't like someone you hang out with, regardless of ethnicity.
I was simply trying to illustrate where my particular reservations have arisen from, but I had also hoped to make clear that I don't let them prevent me from getting to know someone.
It's kind of like this - I almost dislocated my knee while skiing once. I didn't let that prevent me from skiing again, but it did make me more cautious when approaching an area similar to the one I injured myself in. Once I'm there and find there are no hazards in this particular spot, it's all good. I'm sure there are plenty of potential hazards elsewhere on the slope that I'm less concerned with only because I haven't been hurt by them yet. It doesn't mean they aren't there or are less dangerous, I'm just not as conscious of them because I personally haven't had the same experiences with them.
I'm a little like that with meeting new people. If I've been burned by someone, I'm slightly more cautious when meeting people in the future who seem similar on some level. I'm not going to head in the opposite direction without checking them out first though. And because it generally takes me longer to get to know people online, it just takes a bit more time to feel I know someone I'm slightly skittish about (even though that's no fault of their own).
This wasn't even an issue I was consciously aware of before reading this thread and thinking about it, so it isn't a huge factor in my life. But I do have to admit, I do take a little more time getting to know some people than others, just due to past experiences. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/25/2007 10:27:33 AM | # upstream.....
How are you. I understand what your saying...no problem at all.Just an observation on my part as well...............not into Indian guys myself..........lol.......just an observation of dynamics of society by ethnic groups if you will .
One of my points is ok.......if Indian families DO NOT accept outsiders and sometimes they won't......they do not leave unmarried mothers behind them by the thousands either .
That is part of their culture too. You don't get thousands of mixed race half Indian kids without a father do you?
Only this week.....on the Kyle show............................DNA testing of a white girls mixed race baby....the black father already got 2 kids by 2 other women.His sister came on to say......she knew what he was like and still she went with him so she is to blame and I agree but you never see this thing of being shy of getting into this.....it really would be racist not to to comply .
So why stereotype a culture that is very very straight and based on family values? Why would we stereotype a peoples because of this very normal that was culture?
We had a recent case of Molly Campbell aka some muslim name which I can't remember.Molly is 14 of a Pakistani father and a Scottish mother who were married for some 20 years and had 4 kids .The father is quite wealthy in Scotland and Pakistan and when the mother took up with some Scot called Campbell the father divorced the mother and took his kids to Pakistan .Molly being so young was left with the mother in Scotland .Now the mother is in public housing where she had a massive house before and the father and 3 others live in a big house with servants in Pakistan.Molly ran off to be with her father in Pakistan and the balloon went up thinking the father had kidnapped the girl .
But it transpired that she hated to be away from her family.
Molly's father provided her with private tutors and there was a custody battle.In the end...the UK could see that the girl wanted to stay there and her mother understood too.
My actual point is that......I usually see these Indo/ Pak fathers keep in touch or more for their offspring.They don't off load their responsibilities .
So if they don't accept you....they don't impose on you either.They don't leave you holding nothing but a life times responsibilty within months of meeting you.
I have a girlfriend already but I honestly would not hesitate to commit to an Indian girl.......going entirely on her,her culture and what I can see to be self evident around me.
There are certain groups I would not touch with a barge pole going again on the looks of that group,their culture and the evidence of non commitment thats so part of their culture .
Upstream......I like your comments and good luck.Nice talking to you xxx | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/25/2007 10:39:39 AM | | I met a man from India 7 years ago and for 3 years we dated and I even went to India 4 different times from about 2 weeks to 5 months. I talked about how western woman are and the difference of the culture and he said he understood. There was no problems and after 3 years we married and once he came here I started to see the difference. I even learned to cook the foods he liked but it was not enough. He was ok with the way I dressed till we were married. My job was not good enough for him even though it is a goverment job. After 2 years of marriage I caught him cheating and he told me it is the way of the life over there and well I am now divorce so I would not date a man unless he was born in this country. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/25/2007 10:46:38 AM | I don't know about my own likelihood of ever being inclined toward an East Indian man; not because of his heritage but that I prefer the look of a guy with 'dishwater blond' hair. It's just my thing.
(That said, I've recently developed a fascination for Bhangra dance. I love watching it.)
The only firsthand encounters I've had with Indian men were, quite unfortunately, those of a cultural clash wherein I was assumed 'fair game' since I'm single, and the guy couldn't understand why I didn't simply obey him when he said 'I like you, come with me.' | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/25/2007 2:00:51 PM | ^^^^ very wise chik indeed lol ^^^
In reply to the point that florida girl made I would totally dispute that its a way of life to cheat in that culture just because your husband said so .Cheating doesn't happen in the USA/Canada/UK ? It probably happens 100 % more in our culture rather than theirs .
Please excuse me for posting my thoughts.I really cannot understand what you are saying with what we see here .
I don't know if you have heard of Jemima Khan? Daughter of a billionaire British lord who married Imran Khan some 10 years back ? They were married for 8 years and she took up with Hugh Grant the film star .Been with Hugh for 2 years and he has given her the push .
Now when she split from Imran Khan....the media was all for stereotyping.......cultural clash.......we said it wouldn't last...etc etc.
But how many marriages last 8 years anyway even if you are of the same culture? Yet she and Hugh Grant didn't last 2 years ?? And they are of the same culture,same uppercrust background and it was her who cheated....not him.
Naturally everyone has an element of choice and personal exp,dos and donts but really....blame that person......not that culture .You cannot stereotype the culture as wrong or stereotype the people because of the culture.
Yet we see far worse that can be stereotyped.We tolerate amazing behaviour without stereotyping ,yet we stereotype this culture.
I think I will let you all chat amongest yourselves...lol.....I have made my points.......take care xx | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 2/25/2007 2:15:06 PM | | I totally agree with you, nicktomlinrhys. There is definitely a heck lot we can learn from other cultures - we as a society can be so quick to judge, but we are certainly very far from perfect ourselves, lol. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 3/6/2007 1:56:22 AM |
i.e. white women don't seem to respond to East Indian men in the same way white men respond to east indian women
Well many East Indian women tend to be really attractive. Yet it seems that not many East Indian men looked like guys like Stephen Lobo (from the Canadian show Godivas) or Sendhil Ramamurthy (from Heroes). I watch Bollywood movies and rarely find the men to be very attractive (with the exception of a few occasional hotties). But many of the women are almost always stunning.
One of my best friends is East Indian and at 25 has never had a bf. She says she can't date a non East Indian guy (her parents won't let her) except there are none around here she likes (and it's not like she can travel to meet anyone). Her parents were born in Canada and England. She's told me that East Indian males have a lot more freedoms than the females and can often date whomever they choose. I hardly think that's fair. | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 3/6/2007 4:27:04 PM | I've dated more East Indian men than men of my own "race." There are a lot of really hot East Indian men who are "westernized" but still have that something extra. So, yes, I'm a huge fan.  | |
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Zain.
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Joined: 9/20/2005
Msg: 74 | |
| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 3/9/2007 6:13:29 PM | 'Well many East Indian women tend to be really attractive. Yet it seems that not many East Indian men looked like guys like Stephen Lobo (from the Canadian show Godivas) or Sendhil Ramamurthy (from Heroes)."
You can say that about any race how many white girls do you see that look like Angelina Jolie or Julia Roberts?
"I watch Bollywood movies and rarely find the men to be very attractive (with the exception of a few occasional hotties). But many of the women are almost always stunning."
what bollywood movies are you watching? we Indian guys are just as hot as indian girls NUFF SAID! | |
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| Dating East Indian Men
Posted: 3/9/2007 6:20:26 PM | OMG what's wrong with East Indian Men?
We're not that bad!
:D
(this has been my shock factor response after seeing this forum) | |
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