RJB888
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Joined: 11/23/2005
Msg: 101 | |
| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/4/2006 7:29:57 AM | I live in Michigan, one of the highest unemployment states in the USA. Companys folding left and right, many,many men and woman out of work. Michigan is also one of the states with the highest banruptcy, and home forclosers in the USA at this time.
I raised 2 sons on my own. Now after a work injury, a bad injury I'm on ss disability, hopefully not much longer. You never know what life will bring you, I made very good money, now I can barely pay the bills. It's hard to even find a man with a job here, doesn't mean they are lazy bums, life throws curve balls at you.
I never judged a man by how much money he makes or has stashed away, even when I made more than him. I judge by how honest, loyal, how much integerity he has, how he treats me, with loving respect. When I was in a committed relationship, my ex had a bad accident, he couldn't work for a while. I did everything I could, including taking a second job until he could get back on his feet. That's what mature people do when they love someone. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/4/2006 7:37:11 AM | Of course I would! There are an awful lot of people out there living paycheck to paycheck...it's simply reality...and personally, I've never been one of those ladies who gives a damn about how much a gentleman makes....Some of the happiest memories I have were during the extremely lean years as a young bride when the thought of luxury was a sundae from Dairy Queen...did I love him...you bet your ass I did!! | |
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Chrysi
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Joined: 4/24/2006
Msg: 104 | |
| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/4/2006 7:51:54 AM | | I would out a doubt would and have! I think the question almost seems silly! How many people live paycheck to paycheck for whatever the reason may be? This makes them less desirable? Since when have so many of us confused money with love? Its really unsettling how frequently this occurs. I'm not saying people should settle but there are definatley things to look beyond in a patner I think this qualifies! | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/4/2006 8:52:56 AM | Sure I would...why wouldn't I? Paycheck to paycheck is how many people live....even those WITH higher educations. Now..if you are materialistic and want a man with money...I can see why the paycheck to paycheck thing would be an issue with you.~~~
DITTO
If you love someone you shouldnt care whether they have money or not...in this day and age, most of us are living from paycheck to paycheck....as for the apt thing...I just moved a few mos ago myself, I also work 2 jobs, and do alot of outside activities w/my 13 yr old daughter...I still have boxes around that need to be unpacked....but what is more important, the time spent with my child and my family or the house looking immaculate for someone to "judge" me by my cover.....Seems to me if your that worried about his $$ and his looks than the question here is what the heck are you doing with him in the first place? He needs someone that will support him (mentally & emotionally) not a "mommy" or caretaker....
Isnt that what a relationship is all about? | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/4/2006 9:34:58 AM | I could probably relate to this topic a lot as I've also moved to this country several months ago, and don't have all my future figured out yet. I hardly have any furniture and I don't have a TV at home, and I couldn't care less because I wouldn't have time to watch it anyway:)
On the other hand I have two jobs that I like and I go to school fulltime so my paycheck is usually split between paying bills, school and helping out my family
The truth is some of us have to struggle really hard to acomplish what we want, we simply weren't fortunate enough to have it all handed on a silver plate..if you were, then I say enjoy:) all I can say about myself is that I am a fighter and I'm very proud of making it on my own at 21 y.o..
So my advice would be maybe to dig a little deeper and see what the person is all about and perhaps look more into his soul than in his apartment
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/4/2006 10:05:08 AM | | what i dont understand is when a guy spoils his partner and gives her everything she wants,,why do they always moan about money when the poor guy has worked his spuds off just to make her happy, if someone is working and cant afford to save,surely he must be worth more than a pay check,, help the guy out and try finding a solution to his money problems,, Dont just discard him because he isnt financially secure!!i dated a millionaires daughter fom Sydney ,,and i Hated the money, a decent loving personality is worth a hell of a lot more than money!!! | |
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anth28
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Joined: 9/28/2006
Msg: 111 | |
| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/5/2006 9:03:23 AM | | The problem nowadays is that we have too much. As a result, we expect too much. As another poster mentioned, the old timers (such as my parents) had nothing. All they had was each other and a desire to do better. Through thick and thin, their love held them together and they built a life and a family. We dont know these kinds of struggles nowadays (well, some of us dont anyways). Some kids these days, are getting tons of opportunity, which is great, but not if it encourages arrogance. Credit cards are making it easier to pretend that you have money. How many people out there do you think fully own their cars or their fancy clothing? I would say at least 50 percent are living on credit. The worst part, is they dare to pass judgement on those who are honest about their financial situation. If I were to assume that nobody would want me because I am not rich and because I struggle with my bills, then I would be one depressed S.O.B...I have a great job, tons of ambition and a great family, but the city I live in is expensive and I am paying for some poor choices I made as a youth. I want someone in my life who knows where I am coming from; who will be there through thick and thin and who would be happy just spending time with me, rather than expecting red carpet service 24/7...As I mentioned before, it only takes a fraction of a second for our lives to change for the worse, so its nice to believe we can depend on human kindness and understanding when it does... | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/5/2006 9:52:46 AM |
The way I look at it, is wether or not I am living paycheck to paycheck or not, I want a partner who stand by me through thick or thin. Who wants to be involved with someone who leave you the moment you get laid off or hit a rough patch?
Excellent post, anth...
I happen to love an amazing woman (2 year LDR) who lived "paycheck by paycheck", but her bills got way too tight and had no choice but to find a man to help her out. I did all my financial efforts (I'm 2000 something miles away from her) to help her solve many situations, but she had a major problem that forced her to take such decision. I have stood by her through it all, always supporting and standing by her side. With all the pain this implies and after many serious talks, I have accepted and respected her choice, and there's nothing I could do about it. It was a matter of survival, and she will never love another man like she loves me, and I know by heart she means it. Its all the way, through everything, through it all. The bond we have is strong enough to last us a lifetime, and money will always be there, we're both capable of making it, but we're far away from each other and that had its toll on us. To me its all about the bond. Life without having the best of both worlds -spiritual and material-, means nothing. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/6/2006 7:45:30 PM | | I know a guy who is living paycheck to paycheck. Nice guy, known him since high school. He's currently paying back his university loads because he wasn't lucky enough to have mommy and daddy pay for his education. He has a small house and an unimpressive car. By the time he's 35 he'll probably be making 6 figures and have his big loans paid off. Yes, quite the turnoff. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/6/2006 9:07:32 PM | | Just because he is living paycheck to paycheck dosent mean he isnt taking care of himself,or that he dosent have any plans for the future.It could be that he is just getting on his feet & trying to make a living for himself & at the time that job that he had was all he could find.There are plenty of guys out there that are living this way,but has dreams,or plans,but to answer your questions no its not a turn off for me & yes I would date a guy that was living paycheck to paycheck as long as I saw he was trying. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/6/2006 11:16:23 PM | Well to me it doesn't matter..love and caring and nurturing each other is what matters.
When I was little..I have very, very fond memories of my mum and dad just being there for each other. They were poor and when we get together now, I love hearing the stories.
They made it and they are still together after all these years. sooo, maybe they did something right! I think the good old days are so important. Just proves you can't keep up with the Jones as my mom said..god, she was so right. Cause money is not everything! | |
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| Would you have a relationship with someone who cares if your living paycheck to paycheck?
Posted: 11/7/2006 3:09:10 AM | I am in the same boat I live pay cheque to pay cheque and proud of it. Not everyone makes "big" money.
Geez I guess I that would cover most guys going through seperation or divorce ... cause the price of alimony and child support seems to be going up these days... a good chunk of the paycheque!!!
I work hard for my money, live within my means and DON'T have ANY credit cards or debt.
I pay strictly cash!!!! I have really nice things but its taken me a lot of years and hard work to accumulate it.
Some find my lifestyle odd.... I just think its normal and think everyone with credit cards are living above their means.
I call it Getting Real!!! | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 11/8/2006 5:22:10 AM | | The living paycheck to paycheck thing isn't what turns me off (I do it and most everyone I know does too), it's the having no plans or aspirations or goals that is a huge turnoff. I don't care if a man makes 20K a year or 200K a year, if he doesn't have dreams and aspirations I won't get along with him. | |
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