| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 12/14/2006 3:53:20 PM | ^Thats fine if your older and had time to save money.(by the time i finnished a couple up)
As a university student are you financing your education? Good for you running your own business. But was that easy to get started? Did you get a loan to do that? when you first started your business did you always have 3 months in the bank? Did you have 3 months saved up 10 years ago? Do you live on your own or have roommates? shared bills can save you hundreds of dollars. Do you even care about your quality of living? the food you eat? the house you live in? who you live with and around? There are too many variables that can change your circumstances. maybe at your age thats what you've done so thats your expectation but where you live, your education and expereince, your age, your attitude towards work, who you know, who you don't, your previous problems, even your thought process are going to determine where you are in life at least financially.
How long did it take you to save up 3 months? How did you live during that time? probably not very well or it took a long time, unless you were in your parents house. but we don't all get those kinds of luxuries.
If you aren't interested in dating someone that doesn't have 5 grand(figure thats 3 months rent, bills and food, not even including a car if you want them to have a car too make that 7 grand) in the bank then I wish you the best of luck on your treasure hunt.
If I had 5 grand I would invest it before I would bank it anyways. Assets are worth way more then cash.
You gotta spend money to make money you should know that as a small business owner.
I personally set myself some pretty high standards and among ppl that arent willing to put forth effort they may be too high but amoung those who have had time to establish themselves completely they may be a little low but these are my standards based on my circumstances and I'm not going to move to the ghetto so i can bank an extra 100-200 bucks a month on rent or move back in with a roommate so I can cut my bills and rent in 1/2, I would rather work harder, find a second job, find a better job whatever I have to do to take care of business and live my life the way I want too.
At a young age its more important to have goals and to work towards them but is not worth sacrificing the quility of life you live.
Like you said "its called sometimes doing without in order to always have it". If your just starting out there is nothing to "do without" and if you don't find something to "do with" you may never have it to begin with, never mind always having it.
"You can't set the bar until you know how high you can jump, then worry about raising it"
-Me | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 12/14/2006 5:33:36 PM | I have and would continue to date someone who lives paycheck to paycheck..why?...because im not interested in his bank account!!!...im doing the same thing...going through a divorce...bills to pay and working all the overtime i can get and finally think im getting ahead...then the Holidays come and buying gifts for my boys im right back to the paycheck to paycheck thing...guys dont have a problem with me living that way so who am i to judge them because of there bank account  | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 12/14/2006 6:13:29 PM | "As a university student are you financing your education? Good for you running your own business. But was that easy to get started? Did you get a loan to do that? when you first started your business did you always have 3 months in the bank? Did you have 3 months saved up 10 years ago? Do you live on your own or have roommates? shared bills can save you hundreds of dollars. Do you even care about your quality of living? the food you eat? the house you live in? who you live with and around? There are too many variables that can change your circumstances. maybe at your age thats what you've done so thats your expectation but where you live, your education and expereince, your age, your attitude towards work, who you know, who you don't, your previous problems, even your thought process are going to determine where you are in life at least financially.
How long did it take you to save up 3 months? How did you live during that time? probably not very well or it took a long time, unless you were in your parents house. but we don't all get those kinds of luxuries."
Yes - I pay my own way through school. I have never had a loan, OSAP or any other form of assistance. I have been on my own since the age of eighteen. My business was easy to start because I have a previous degree in that field, and jumped in while the market was in my favour. I have had at least 3 months saved sinvce the age of 20 - I had a bad accident and realized how important it was to pre-plan for that sort of thing. I live alone in a two bedroom apartment in a brand new house. I have a high quality of living - I've been educated in Italy, and currently am finishing my last year of university. I travel to at least two new destinations each year (in 2006 it was Mexico for 2 months and Scotland/England for 2 weeks). I own my vehicle outright and have since I purchased it new in 2002. I have no debt, no credit card balances or outstanding issues. It took me approx. 1.5 years to save - I invested every spare cent I had and still sock away a certain amount each month - that's where the difference comes in. You're right, ASSETS are woth more than cash - which is why I also have stocks and bonds, and retirement plans. It isn't ALWAYS about a bank account but about wise decisions. You don't need to be rich, or have an inheritance (or any of those other reasons) to become free from paycheque to paycheque living. I did say "live without" - I've lived without expensive clothing and shoes, eating in restaurants or spending money on unecessary items ( alcohol, smoking). I clip coupons, look for sales and watch my spending. I am not on any type of "treasure hunt". I have done this all on my own, and am quite capable of banking my own future. The last time I lived paycheque to paycheque, I was 19 years old working through school. My future goals include both teachers college and going after my masters. Desiring someone who does not live paycheque to paycheque is about motivation; not money. I've managed without any "magical" inheritances or "sugar daddies", and I come from the same place in life that the majority of people do. In my opinion, more often than not, it is those people who live paychaque to paycheque that concern themselves with the "money" aspect because they are seeking stability in their future. I have a right to expect the same in a mate that I have to offer. What fun is travelling alone? If my mate cannot afford (both in time and money) as me, how do you develop any common interests?
In case you've missed it, the world is built on class structure and privilege levels. We all fit in somewhere. Some got lucky, most work hard - some will always get, some never will. I've worked hard to be where I am, and just won't accept anyone as a mate who has any less motivation, success or ability.
STM. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 12/14/2006 6:18:05 PM | | I'm kinda living paycheck to paycheck right now but it's because my money is tied up in plans for the future. I'm also cheap and don't like to blow my money on whiskey and women. I brush my teeth 3 times a day and shower at least once a day. I haven't had my prostate check in a couple years though. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 12/15/2006 4:57:16 AM | So if you met someone ten years younger then you who hapeened to be a great person(attractive, personality, motivated to succeed, lots of abilites) but they happened to live paycheck to paycheck because they were in school or starting there own business or something to further themselves you wouldn't give them the time of day because they have yet to establish themselves? (your gonna miss out on a lot of great people)
travelling alone would suck, if your doing as well as you say you are and you meet someone your serious about you wouldn't consider covering even some of the costs of travelling on the trip YOU already want to go on? and how does that have to do with common interests unless your only interest is travelling? try finding hobbies there are many enjoyable things in life that do not cost thousands of dollars? Active things are always fun, maybe collect something I have many hobbies try a few things at once it couldn't hurt!
Living without "expensive clothing and shoes, eating in restaurants, or spending money on unnecessary items(alcohol, smoking)" are probably things you do now though So between 18 and 20 you had to set the bar a little lower then work your way up just like the rest of the world so how can you judge someone going through the same things you had too?
I'm sure glad I buy expensive clothes and shoes they last longer are more comfortable plus I'm real picky about that stuff and if I want it chances are I'm getting it, it's like investing, I also love eating in restarants in fact I probably do it many times a week sometimes the convience is just worth it plus I have an apprication for good service, and if I didn't go out for drinks with my friends well I'd be worried I'm not getting out enough. You have to have priorties but you have to treat yourself every once and a while too even if you are living paycheck to paycheck.
It all comes down to priorities
If your biggest priority is finding someone that can afford to travel with you I feel bad for the guy that gets stuck with you unless he happens to be an old rich man because there are few people in there 30s that can afford the money and time to leave the country for months at a time. Good jobs unless you are your own boss give you 2-4 weeks/ year for vacation. So you've narrowed it down to old men and travelling entrepenurs. if you date a pilot i bet he can get you coupons for your trips. all joking aside I'm not trying to be a****and I probably cant change your mind anyway just think you need to realize that no one wants to live paycheck to paycheck but sometimes it happens out of no fault of the person who is and you are basing your opinions of someone on something they may not have control over you might as well be racist. I wish you the best of luck finding someone you consider as successful as you are. Successful people are always the best aren't they? haha have fun | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 12/15/2006 11:08:57 AM | | A relationship isn't all about the mighty dollar. I live from paycheck to paycheck so why should i be the one to judge someone else. Money isn't that important, maybe to some it is. But if a person is happy and caring then whats the problem. Is it you that thinks he doesn't have any plans for the future, he may have plans but they might not be what u want them to be. Look at the person for who he is and not his wallet. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/3/2007 9:08:16 AM | Standing Up with Irish Eyez!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey isn't this normal living for most of us now days? 'I take great care of myself and many of my friends with full time good office jobs live the same way... Some chose to live beyond their means , some have had tragedy in their life placing them in this situation but live their lives to the fullest while here on this earth.. I for one... It does in no mean we are not prepared for our futer or not"taking care of our self"
I fully agree with Irish Eyez...How very shallow of someone to judge another when they haven't walked in their shoes. People should not judge a book by it's cover because if they take the time to look inside and read the content they would truely be surprised.
I have and will continue to date and associate with these type of friends. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/3/2007 9:25:23 AM | I'm kind of pay check to pay check now. I had wondered if any one would actually want to date me because of it.
As to the state of his place and his having "no friends"... well I guess it depends on how much he has to work to survive. For a while I was working 40 hours a week at my job and out of the house 10 hours a week for internship and class (before homework time)... the place didn't get cleaned often. (That, and I have half of an apartment crammed into a rented basement.)
It seems like you've already made up your mind though, OP... if he doesn't clean, has no friends, and has no ambition, and this bothers you, he is obviously not for you. I don't understand what his financial situation has to do with any of this... | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/3/2007 10:13:01 AM | There is truth in the fact that most people are not in a situation where they have either learned how to save or have the ability to save. I fo one am in the sceond of those catergories. I have a good paying job but 20% of my gross pay goes for child support payments. Now that is a good thing as I am providing for my children. But I pay that out of my Net income and am left with barely enough to pay for my car , my rent, my food, and groceries. So I live paycheque to paycheque.
And thank god that I do not have a g/f that is worried about that. I spend time with her and we do things with our kids collectively to help the money go further.
It is not whether your lifestyle is pretty and planned out ... It is how your lifestyle is about having a life with those you care about. So the answer to you question is ... I think that it is fine, and even better if that is the case so if we want to plan together we have a common goal. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/3/2007 11:10:14 AM | Gold diggers usually last in a relationship about as long as they don't ever age, get sick, or until he finds a replacement. Most people live pay check to pay check. I did until my Dr. made me retire a year and a half ago because my vision issues were causing too many headaches that caused me to have some serious issues. But people who loved me when I made $4,000 a month, still love me now that I am ss disability. The men I have dated still think I am adorable and fun. I guess because unless you surround yourself with shallow people money is a non issue.
I also know a lot of unmarried men who work a lot and cleaning their apartments is not high on their list, so what? When I was working, I didn't have time to be the perfect housekeeper either. | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 163 | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/3/2007 12:09:54 PM | | Maybe I got the thing all wrong but what am reading is that you are unsure as to whether you want a relationship or not with this guy. you seem to have put up several reasons other than the truth.Living paycheck to paycheck is very common, having a messy apt for a normal guy is normal, so really what is the really question( or reason). Do you have feelings for the gent or not if you do then nothing else matters, and if you don't then there is no reason to stay with him very simple. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/4/2007 12:20:41 AM | A PERSON'S WORTH IS NOT HOW MUCH MONEY HE HAS OR WEALTH---- ITS HOW HE TREATS YOU AND TAKES CARE OF YOU......
***I VALUE LOVE, HONESTY, RESPECT, TRUTH, INTEGRITY, AFFECTION THAT IS WHY I FELL INLOVE WITH MY BF, AL & I HOPE EVERYONE FINDS SOMEONE LIKE THAT FOR A CHANGE RATHER THAN WHAT THEY HAVE IN THEIR WALLET OR BANK ACCOUNT.....
i never look at a person's BANK ACCOUNT when I go out with them because I am my own person & so does he...
If you go out with a person because of how much money they make or what's in their bank account..... you are not out with the person but you are out because you have a WALKING ATM MACHINE....
Love is to be measure on how u love the person, take care of the person, how he loves u and takes care of you --- everything else around doesnt really matter... I LOVE MY BF, AL whether or not he makes money enough or not--- I love him because of what he feels towards me & what i feel towards him.... Everything else goes along with it....
LOVING someone because they have money or wealth isnt HEALTHY if u ask me because MONEY CHANGES EVERYTHING and if you revolve that around love and relationship that would cause a problem.....
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/4/2007 12:52:07 AM | Yeah your pretty shallow because the list keep's growing as people give you reason you should personaly I wouldn't mess with some one illegal .But this has nothing to do with you situation your's is how much money do's he have. But you already made up your mind because you keep comming up with reason's. So do him a favor and dont't date him.
yeah I met your type: She played me well see I had alot going for me once I went to a place and did thing's no man should do and seen things no one should just to afford the money so we could have a nice wedding and a nice car and a house. Well I was makeing the kind of money people just think about. Then when I got back home she emptyed our joint bank account 40,000 in saveings but she never worked for any of we had no kids to support. Took the jeep she bought with money I earned and my dam dog also the cat. well Thinks to a woman like you I now have bad credit and have started my way back up O yeah I live paycheck to paycheck now but not allways . so do him a favor and leave him alone because there maybe someone out there that will love him were as youll use him
And your that type your like the dark cinderella you could meet the prince instead you just want the castle. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/4/2007 6:37:08 AM | | those of you who would date somone who lives paycheck to paycheck . a girl I work with is doing "just " that now . F IN A L L Y . her boyfreind almost killed her . he beat her up really bad . last nihgt . I told her call the police and have thme take photos . she kept saying " I don't want to get him hurt . " aw come on girl . IF , she was 35 I would date her in no time . the only bad part is she is 24 and I am 40 . Like she would want a old guy like me as her boyfreind . because she would not call the police I did . I had them DOCUMENT all her brusies . this way she can get a restaing order . | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/4/2007 7:06:13 AM |
those of you who would date somone who lives paycheck to paycheck . a girl I work with is doing "just " that now . F IN A L L Y . her boyfreind almost killed her . he beat her up really bad . last nihgt . I told her call the police and have thme take photos . she kept saying " I don't want to get him hurt . " aw come on girl . IF , she was 35 I would date her in no time . the only bad part is she is 24 and I am 40 . Like she would want a old guy like me as her boyfreind . because she would not call the police I did . I had them DOCUMENT all her brusies . this way she can get a restaing order .
I'm just wondering what domestic violence has to do with living paycheque to paycheque. Are you implying there's a correlation? | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/4/2007 11:33:38 AM | OP,
Being poor is not a sin. If a person is poor because of being financially irresponsible, then there is a cause for a concern. Because, he is likely irresponsible in other aspects of his life.
Some people are poor now, but they are hard-working and financially responsible. They may be very successful in the future.
Thus, in my opinions, it is better to judge a man based on his character and personality rather his lack of wealth.
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