| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/4/2007 12:12:39 PM | No I would not date such a guy who was financially irresponsible. Why because if he is living hand to mouth so to speak what long term plans would he have? What would happen if we got longer into a relationship and moved in & didnt have the funds to pay his way? Not the ideal set up really  | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/4/2007 2:14:36 PM | Just cause a person living paycheck to paycheck doesn't mean they have no plan for the future or can't take care of themself.......
My friend had a great job for many year making over 100,000 a year, two years ago the company went belly up and he had no idea it was going to. He had the world by the ass one minute and is now living paycheck to paycheck to keep the life he had.
This is why we should never judge another.... | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/4/2007 2:31:52 PM | This is more of a sign of being materialistic than anything if you're judging someone based on paycheck to paycheck criteria without looking at the context of their situation.
If a person is scraping by because they were irresponsible and blew money one stupid things like gambling AND continues to do so, then yes it is a reasonable thing to make a judgment on.
However, if a person is doing so because they had to pay for their education, other responsibilities like children, etc. Then it is a shallow thing to base a judgment on. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/6/2007 5:17:07 AM | | Yes I would depending on the circumstances. We have all at one point in our life been living paycheck to paycheck. It does not necessarily mean that they are financially irresponsible. Divorce for one takes a toll on finances as for some in my area the natural disasters that happened a couple of years back also did and it does take a little while to get back on your feet. I think you have to look at the whole picture when dating someone and don't necessarily jump to conclusions about thier personalities or ethics and morals based on thier lack of savings or material goods. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/6/2007 5:27:58 AM | People will think what they wish to think, and no one... however eloquent on these threads they MAY be, will change anyone's preconcieved notions. Try as you might to offer some advice, it will more often than not, be ignored.
So... you will always hear this...
"Are you broke because you had to finance your education?"
"Then talk to the hand... I'm not dating you because you cannot maintain my upkeep! How am I supposed to have my nails done weekly? Who will make my car payment? Who will pay for the maintenance on this lovely home, which I will steal right from under you when I leave you for the gardener... then move him in?"
Such is life... it sucks occasionally, so wear a helmet.
Here's some real advice. Stop offering advice. It's an exercise in futility akin to pissing in a strong wind. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/6/2007 5:57:28 AM | | That is interesting I didn't realize we were offering advice just answering a question. Either way it does give one hope that all people are not alike and that some can still see the big picture and whether it be an excercise in futility or not. Everyone can learn from Everyone whether they are eloquent or not and some that may read the forums are actually open to the idea that people have differences of opinion and that that opinion is right for each one for thier own reasons. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/6/2007 6:36:45 AM | Wow - so this is the factor that some people use to decide whether or not to have a relationship on? Does no one ever look at history? Are things so important that we forget that living pay cheque to pay cheque is not at all a new phenomenon? Are we so blinded by today's materialistic world that we have forgotten times like the Great Depression where you couldn't even live paycheque to paycheque, because there were no paycheques? And there have been hard times since then. And the way it is going, there will be more.
Pay hasn't kept up with inflation. There are endless reasons why this has happened, and most of them beyond the control of the "common person".
If he's working - at any job - then why would he be less desirable than someone who can throw money at whatever they want. It's not about the what he can buy me, or what he can't buy me - it's about him. Is he the one that I want a relationship with, not his bank account. Cold comfort there. And that's just MY opinion. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/6/2007 6:42:37 AM | Thank gawd irish eyes, you are one of few. i was dumpped for the reason I was living pay to pay. i think it is materialistic and hypacritical for a woman in this day and age to expect anyone to put up with that. as soon as a woman asks me now what do you make(significantly more now than b4 by the way) i cut em lose,screw that. theyre gold diggers looking for cash. i made mine, they have to make theirs if they want more they make more, not have mine. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/6/2007 7:57:30 AM | I think you should get real we re not all multi millionaires,I think you need to come down from the clouds, an as a nurse I have to live month by month.unless I get a second income an get hammered tax wise, then its not worth it, unless I meet a rich bird,to take care of me, I have plenty of plans for the future, but it will take time.cheers.  | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/6/2007 8:19:24 AM | he says " he is living paycheck to paycheck " ...............but he might be saving for something...................
he might not have money for u to to do anything .................but someone else he will.............
as for no friends hmm that could say something maybe he doesn't feel comfortable with u meeting them or he is playing u !!! | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/7/2007 7:06:01 PM | | OMG......u sound like u are high and mighty .....most of the lower and middle class do work ..and it is paycheck to paycheck. I mean I work as a teachers assistant...and we get paid poorly...and I am living paycheck to paycheck...wow someone better look at how she views others....scary to know there are people as shallow as u! | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/7/2007 7:41:25 PM | It has noting to do with being a gold digger. It is about having the same mind set about money. Money is one of the top reasons people divorce. That said:
Yes, I would date him if he was living paycheck to paycheck but had good money management skills, had realistic goals and came from a family who was financially responsible.
No, I wouldn't date him if he was living paycheck to paycheck, had poor money management skills and limited aspiration for more. Also, no if he came from a family who was financially irresponsible. It is hard to change what one learned growing up. That’s why you see people win the lotto and go broke within years of winning it big or child actor go broke despite their savings because they mismanage their funds once they get their hands on it. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/9/2007 12:07:43 PM | All paycheque to paycheque means is that most likely that the person has no real reason to make long term goals in thier mind. And they lack the resolve to follow through in some cases. There are any number of reasons for why ...
The important thing is that if you plan on making a life together then make the money plan as well and stick to it. And then you both are not ... And even if you save money ... Are you not living paycheque to paycheque ???
Or is this the difference between being finacially stable and being the working poor??
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/10/2007 1:22:21 AM | Paycheck to paycheck...this thread cracks me up!
Awful funny how nobody ever seems to notice or care if it's "trust fund allowance to trust fund allowance"...Oh no...That possibly spells w-e-a-l-t-h!
I've said it before in previous threads...what difference does it make what someone else has...or what they do (or do not do) with it?
Just because they have it...doesn't mean they're going to share it!
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/10/2007 1:37:46 AM | Living Pchck to Pchck is something a lot of people do sweetie, but it doesn't mean there a loser....lol Hell, I make good money but haven't had a good raise for sometime (just merit) but that's about to change, or I walk! But it's going to happen! But it can be hard living by yourself and keeping up a house and car and Blah blah blah! Don't mean I'm a loser! or don't have a future! Lay oooo say er  | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/10/2007 1:52:37 AM | I was employed full-time for 21 years until I was suddenly and unexpectedly unemployed.
My only choice was to try getting a freelance career up & running.
That was 6 years ago, I've had good years, and bad years, always a cloud of uncertainty was over my head, living invoice to invoice.
Does this make me a less-worthy dating prospect as far as some women are concerned? I would hope not, but some women look for financial security above all else.
Rich or poor, I'm still the same man, and I would hope any woman I would become involved with would look beyond the bottom line. Any woman who had such a mercenary and narrow view would not be someone I would be interested in anyway. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/10/2007 7:10:23 AM | I think she may be more concerned with him living from her paycheque to her paycheque.....
If you don't like it dump him and move on. The money issue is always a topic women flip flop on. It drives me nuts.
My dad made $3/day as a cop back in the 50's and my mom married him anyway. They worked together and over the course of their lives together have been successful, raised a family and now enjoy their retirement doing whatever the hell they want. They lived within their means and made sacrifices for the benefit of their family.
No one likes to struggle but" many hands make light work". | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/10/2007 7:39:20 AM | There have been some really good posts here on this subject--looking at "why" the person is living "paycheck to paycheck"--
When I first met my husbsand 20+ years before we married, he was quite successful in his business, later he became very wealthy, then had some business reverses and trouble with the IRS, etc. and was worse off than Paycheck to paycheck at the time we married. The first couple of years we lived off my salary while he got his business interests staight again and got the IRS off his back (he won in court, but hiring the lawyer was costly) but I knew that going in. He recovered by hard work and we worked together and when he died 20 years after I married him, we had enough assets that I could quit work and retire as long as I didn't "live too high on the hog" as we say here in the south, but I do live comfortably and don't owe a soul a dime and have enough income to pay my monthly bills and a few nice frills.
Would I have a relationship withh someone who was a "deadbeat"? Nope, but living "paycheck to paycheck" for some period of time due to some circumstances like going to school, sickness, divorce, business reverses, etc. as long as you don't try to llive ABOVE your pay check. Now that is a problem. Some people who have "had money" and then don't, seem to thinkk they can't do without all the toys, frills, etc. and are not willing to "lower their standard of living" just because they don't have enough money coming in to support that lifestyle. Or others, who "Wish" they had money enough to support a better lifestyle, spend on their credit cards like they had the money to support it and the first thing you know, they are in financial trouble!
Unfortunsately some people equate "status" in clothes, "toys, ' houses, cars, with "good"--and have a false pride about appeariing affluent. I have never had that problem, I guess becaues I have my grandparents' depression-era philosophy of" use it up and make it do" if that is what you can afford. Stay out of debt if at all possible, or get out as quickly as you can (like for a house or car, big items) NEVER buy anything you can live without on credit (like jewelry, expensive clothing, toys of any kind, gifts for others, etc.)
In the meantime, I know many people my age (60) who would love to retire but have so many bills for their very very upscale house, the upscale cars they have always driven, etc. the "name brand" clothing, jewelry, etc. that they will almost never be able to retire and quit work. They are the ones that will be greeters at Wal Mart when they are 75 and can't get another job to buy food with.
At this point in life I am just looking for a nice guy that isn't head over heels in debt for his "toys" and "upscale" vehicles--paycheck to paycheck is fine as long as he isn't deeply in debt for stuff he doesn't really need. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/10/2007 7:39:38 AM | Paycheck to paycheck does not mean the person is not planning for the future. Most people live paycheck to paycheck - because they are putting away money in their 401k's for retirement in the future, paying child support or putting away money for their children's education.
I would certainly date a man who was living paycheck to paycheck. Since my divorce, I have pretty much been in the same boat as living paycheck to paycheck - but I am still able to take vacations when I want and certainly take care of my financial responsibilities. | |
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| Would you have a relationship with a guy who's living paycheck by paycheck?
Posted: 4/10/2007 7:53:41 AM | I'm glad I had experience at this. I've always done pretty well, then when my wife got sick, I went crazy with alternative stuff, lost everything, then she died and I was broke. When I first started dating, I realized that it is important, we're not getting any younger, and who wants to empty the trash cans at Mickey D's when they're 70? Or not be able to pay for your wife's perscription?
Now, I am back up to over 6 figures, single, happy as a lark, and moving to a beachfront place in St. Pete Beach in June. It's just something a man should do. We all get down on our luck, but you can't hold a good man down for too long. If a guy has a history of being responsible, give him a chance, if he complains, and blames everybody else for his problems, stay away, it's that simple. Good Luck. | |
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