| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 11/14/2006 5:40:33 PM | what's "separation" mean to you??
to mean it means: no longer together
why should it be cheating??
is it easier to forgive and forget if a couple's no longer together, why should it even matter?
Well, I've been officially separated for 10 months and I am starting to feel ready to move on and date, but when I shared this with a friend of me, she said,
"But that's like cheating... and what if you get back together later on... He'll never forgive you." 
Are you planning to get back together????
If you were, you likely woudn't be here.
If you're not, shouldn't you be free to date??? | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 11/14/2006 5:52:05 PM | not its not cheating when you are seperated..
but saying that..
i also have to be honest and say i would not forgive..
its not like waiting would kill someone..
if youve been seperated for more than 3 months that is..
and you have not tried to high 'thugs' to 'get payback' also
and its not a blood relative..
or a hated enemy.. | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 11/14/2006 5:57:47 PM | "If you are married, and formally separated, then yes, your partner may consider that cheating if he is not dating and having sex with other people."
***What if you've been separated for six years (living in separate households and everything) but are still technically married, because he drags his feet and probably secretly hopes you'll come crawling back to him, but knows it'll never happen, chooses not to date at all... So does that mean that the other person also has to choose celibacy?
Ninki
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 11/14/2006 6:18:41 PM | If you have been legally separated for 10 months then your marriage is OVER. You can't be cheating when a relationship no longer exists.
As for your second question the answer is "No". It's bad enough being a victim without adding insult to injury by allowing the other person to get off the hook for their betrayal. | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 11/14/2006 9:51:03 PM | Can you honestly live with it?
Can you live with it, truly work out the difficulties in your marriage and TRULY forget without years of torment,torture and suffocation in an unhappy marriage that dies an agonizing death while eating up your years selfishly?
(oh, I find myself getting carried away.....)
Just asking.  | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 3/1/2008 10:13:04 AM | if there was infidelity it should show what the other person felt was important in their life.
if it's easy to bounce from one person to another, then it shows weakness of character in not being able to be alone.
if there's a separation, then I say either remain apart and don't date again or if date, do with others and never look back. sometimes we forget why the separation occured but you'll recall when back together before long. | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 3/1/2008 2:57:28 PM | Ok, as a medical professional, I can tell you this.
Condoms are 5x thinner, THINNER than a set of rubber gloves.
When you have sex with someone, you are exposing your body to unheard of things.
You are exposing yourself at a higher level than any doctor ever truly does (except surgeons, who wear 2 pairs of gloves when they do surgery).
Anyone that you are not in a monogamous relationship with, you don't routinely know their body. There could be internal cuts and things like that that you are exposing yourself to.
So in other words, it is very medically wrong to have promiscuous sex. I know that others are going to speak to this from a moral way, but medically, you are putting yourself and all the innocent future partners you have at a very real high risk. When you do meet that righ person, what will you have to truly offer them? | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 3/1/2008 3:19:40 PM | | how is it cheating when its ON A BREAK, on a break means you want time to figure things out but, if either of you come across someone else its not cheating because ,you are not officially with anyone YOUR'RE ON A BREAK. To make it alot easier because , every situation differs from another have the understanding that if that comes up while your on a break how the two of you plan on handling that situation when it arises . | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 3/1/2008 4:59:18 PM | | I think it depends on your intentions regarding the separation. Is it just a stage on the way to divorce, or really just a time-out? The former is a legitimate reason to look for a new relationship, the latter is risking the existing relationship. | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 3/1/2008 8:04:22 PM | The reason why you get a SEPERATION is to give each other space, and see if a reconciliation is possible. If you have cheated, this makes a reconciliation more difficult. It just adds FUEL TO THE FLAMES. It puts the relationship in futher jeopardy. Unless you are very religious and both agree to ask God's forgiveness, and continue to pray together and live a very PURE LIFE, with thoughts of God constantly, in order to strengthen your professed lOVE for one another..... GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE, GIRL..... | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 3/1/2008 8:42:57 PM | If you two have split with no desire or hope of getting back together, then it's fair game to do whatever you want. Having said that, consequences follow your actions, so think carefully before you jump into someone else's bed. 
Pink | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 3/1/2008 11:20:44 PM | | I think it depends on whether mutually you consider that during separation you consider you have a relationship, or whether in the act of separation the relationship is dissolved. I think if you both agree implicitly or explicitly there is no longer any mutual intimate relationship when you separate, then if one partner is intimate with another person, strictly speaking that is not infidelity. But if both of you agree a relationship still exists, then I think someone is cheating if they have sex after separation which does not end the relationship. However, if one person dissolves a relationship with you in order to be with someone else, to me that would imply that already when in a relationship with me, my partner desired intimacy with another person at the expense of our entire relationship, and that to me is as bad as actually cheating in reality. I consider this infidelity and would treat it accordingly. | |
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| Is it Cheating when you are seperated and could you forgive?
Posted: 3/1/2008 11:59:05 PM | To me a separation is when one or both members of a relationship need ALONE time to reflect on their relationship and where things are going. A time to gather thoughs and feelings in order to talk about what is going on. It's not a 10 month vacation in sin city.
It is not a reason or excuse to date or sleep with other people - unless your delusional, immature, and selfish. I will say that to anyones face who challenges this fact.
In what way possible could it be a good idea to date others in a separation period? Your simply hiding from your problems in doing so, not trying to fix your situation at all. You are in fact making things worse. Message me if you've ever been separated and got back together knowing your partner has been sleeping around during that time and feel great with them now, or if you got back together with them knowing you've been sleeping around and tell me things are perfect. Message me if you are still together and how many faithful years you've been together since the 'trial sex run'. I'd be suprised to recieve one message, but i'd be big enough to congratulate you on so far surviving a disfunctional relationship.
There is never a good reason or excuse for cheating ever. It is something I would/will never forgive. I do not see cheaters as human and will not treat them like one. If you have to stop and think even for a split second to decide if you're single or not - it's cheating. You know if your single or not regardless of what paper might tell you. If your not sure, I'd figure that out before you decide to 'try somethin new'. | |
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