| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 7:22:34 AM |
she was still in love with her deceased, all the signs were there.
Hard enough to run competition with someone who is alive but when they are deseased you have no way of doing it. Alot of times when people become widowed they put thier spouse on a pedestal and forget the bad times they had. Its impossible to compete for someone when they still love the one they lost. | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 7:24:49 AM |
Let me put it like this Dayna,and the rest of the crew.If I had them eyes to look into,weather it be friend,Lover,or what ever it may be.Don't you think we would all be happier then what we re now.Hell look at all of us here,****ing about what we don't have,but we are all just to dam affraid to admit that we all are giving up on something we all need in Life! Someone in it,Sometimes we just need to take chances and we don't.Why? because we are affriad of what well come of that.So we alone because of that
If something is worth having its worth taking a chance. Are we afraid of getting hurt, sure. But its proof that we still want that stuff or we wouldnt still be here. Its natural to be afraid, sometimes i think Im more afraid of how i feel than how they would | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 7:27:18 AM | | We live to much with our guards up,and where does it get us? Being by our selfs. But somewhere some how,I well get what Im looking for either that,or live a life alone.And deal with.it | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 7:29:56 AM | Dayna, Do you speak from experience? .. very good observation ..
The only thing I will say .. I thank her for being there everyday, taking time off from her job to be with me while I had my surgery .. I do believe she cared for me, but the " in love " was always missing. I almost hate saying this, we were together six years and that was four years to long .. | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 7:30:13 AM | My Motto: I don't want a man I can live with, I want one I can't live without!
I keep taking chances, one POFer hit all the right nerves over the summer, he ran! But the man I SETTLE for will make me feel like that..... | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 7:36:21 AM | Not to make this sound cruel,
But, when someone says to you, they still love their deceased, they are angry at that person for dieing, they are angry because that person said they'd never leave them .. It's time to walk away from that relationship and hope that person gets the help they need. | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 8:09:54 AM | its not really cruel. there are some divorced folks that are the same way though. believe me, i hear about the ex husband of a co-worker daily....she has not let go and its been 30 years.....she won't even date!
Some folks can't let go of the love of their lives. | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 8:17:12 AM | | I'm beginning to think that ex loves of our lives tear pieces of us off and take it with them. But there is always lots of pieces left. If we don't think that we have anything left, well, we have lost the most precious thing which is ourselves. | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 8:34:05 AM |
Dayna, Do you speak from experience? .. very good observation
The only real expirence i had with this Dana, is my mother. After my father passed away she suddenly decided what a wonderful man he was. He was abusive verbally to everyone and physically to me. But when he died no man could be his equal. when my mother started dating again she ended up marrying a man who was totally the opposite of my father. He was a wonderful and i still consider him family even tho they divorced 5 yrs after they got married. I always felt she never gave him a chance and was always comparing him to my father. In reality if she had been honest in the comparison He would have won by a landslide matching against my father. She passed away almost a year ago and although we were very close that subject was one we would have always disagreed on. My Step-father taught me alot in those five years mostly how to be a daughter and how to have a father. | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 9:20:43 AM | Sharon,
A person can only take a piece or pieces of us if we let them.
What should happen and hopefully does, each person of a failed relationship will learn from it and take those lessons learned and apply them to the next relationship they have.
I for one learned alot from my past relationship and I hope she learned some things from me. | |
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Frozyn
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Joined: 11/6/2006
Msg: 111 | |
| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 1:07:09 PM | The human body is one of the most amazing creations known to man. If you break a bone, the body can repair it, and even make it more dense and stronger than ever before. If you damage muscle tissue, the body uses protiens and other nutrients to repair the damage, and makes it stronger than ever before. All this is done without you having to think about it, or force it.
Our mental stability works in the same way. When we are "broken", Our mind goes through a series of emotions. We get angry and say it will never happen to us again. They we cry for days, missing the very one that hurt us in the first place. Then we get angry again. Believe it or not, this is how we heal ourselves. And its a natural process. Sometimes we throw up fortresses of solitude around our hearts to protect ourselves. And sometimes, with good company, we let go.
My theory is to let it happen. Let yourself go through the range of emotions. Because anytime you try to force yourself to anything otherwise, the pain will just remain longer than it should. Or you'll end up doing something you didnt really want to do.
Then, move on. | |
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tj7
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Joined: 11/7/2005
Msg: 112 | |
| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 1:27:48 PM | I never settle for someone just because I'm lonely........I find that to be shallow and immature.............If I'm lonely...........I come to YOU guys  | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 1:44:03 PM | starting next week, after all of my christmas decorating is done i'm gonna start baking cookies.........lots of butter cookies.........
thank god for electric cookie guns... | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 1:51:43 PM | Anna,
Electric cookie gun huh ?
I don't believe you ...
I think it's another name for a B O B ... 
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 1:55:16 PM | sorry dana..................nopers it's my proctor silex electric cookie gun.....i go crazy baking cookies for my family, neighbors, and friends................
if you want some cookies you have to come here for them. if i go to send them in the mail, the mailman would eat them then you wouldn't have any... | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 2:41:55 PM | if i mail them to you the mail man would have already eaten them...........now where's my dinner? | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 2:43:45 PM | | I did not get any cookis,so what are you talking aobut?When I see my cookies,then i'll send you your goodies ok? | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 3:40:52 PM | lakie, hun, the package is going to be empty....the mailman is going to eat them. | |
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Frozyn
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Joined: 11/6/2006
Msg: 121 | |
| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 3:54:20 PM |
There is a difference between being alone and being lonely.
Thats a very fine line for a lot of people.
The only time I really ever feel alone, or lonely, is at night, in bed, when trying to sleep. Its the only time I unfortunately wander into the "what might have beens". | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 5:40:50 PM | hmmm, i cuddle up with my fuzzy wuzzy brownie bear when i feel lonely at night. other thank that, i think of what projects i'm going to be doing, i think about my business, christmas, and baking lots of cookies. | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 9:02:38 PM | Anna,
Tempting offer there .. Drive over to PA for some cookies, and of course to meet you !! | |
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| Filling the Lonely Times
Posted: 11/12/2006 9:11:42 PM | sure come on over........i'm going to start baking next weekend........i make atleast 10lbs of butter just in butter cookies.
oh and dana, make sure you bring the milk for my tea.........i have plenty of teabags, coffee, and sugar | |
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