| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 11/28/2006 5:33:04 PM | Actually, I had "the talk" with my 10 year old this evening.
He started with the questions as we entered a restaurant with his younger brother; I cut him off real quick and said we'll talk when we get home. He wasn't too happy but what could I do?-His brother is right there!
Later, I gave him the the straight truth, just like he asked for.
There is no Santa Claus.
He cried for a little while.
Then he figured he might as well ask me to buy him a mate for his skink, instead of asking Santa.
So he can raise the hatchlings and sell 'em. | |
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ya472
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Joined: 4/29/2006
Msg: 27 | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 3/26/2007 12:44:30 PM | I never had a specific "Talk" with them at any given age.
We started when they were much younger than teenage years.
Our first gender-sex discussion was with a little cartoon book with drawings
for young children and explanations they could understand called,
"Where did I come From"
We , the three of us, looked at the book together and they asked any questions
they had . I can not remember exactly what age that was, but pretty sure
it was when they were in grade school. When they started asking questions I
pulled out the book.
Since that time we always had conversations about my hopes and expectations
for them, as they got older.
There realy never was a time that my children and I did not have the kind of
relationship , that we felt we couldnt talk about anything. I suppose now that they
are adults, we do not talk about it as much, but I still always throw in reminders about
safe sex and condoms, even though they have heard it a million times.
And I always get, Yea, Ma I know.
Doesnt hurt to drum it into their heads when the opportunity arises.
Just like all the other things I have taught them, like drinking and driving.
Poor kids, I am a broken record.
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 3/26/2007 1:51:33 PM | | I've always been open and honest with my children. Our talks were spontaneous for the most part and always age-appropriate. It was never a 'dirty' thing that was hidden away. To this day they both have a very healthy and responsible attitude toward sex. They are respectful of women and of themselves. | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 3/26/2007 1:58:21 PM | Yes, I did and boy she set me straight on a lot of things... just kidding. Actually it's not about just one talk it's about living by example. One of the most important things that I do as a parent is allow my daughter (who is presently 17) to see what a good man does in and out of a relationship. Since she was 5 years old I've cooked her candle light dinners. When I've been in a relationship I've attempted to show her that a good man treats a woman with respect and concern. I didn't introduce her to women that I dated until I knew that these women would be a fixture in my life. And in my view I always thought that any woman was some man's daughter and since I want my daughter treated well how could I do anything that didn't treat another man's daughter with respect.
When my daughter was 5 we watched Pillow Talk. A silly Doris Day movie and I explained how Rock Hudson's character was a man who acted "silly" because he wanted a kiss from Doris Day. Thus, that was my first "sex" talk with my daughter. As she grew older we would talk about numerous things and by the time she hit those God awful teen years she was a pretty sharp kid. We can and have talked about just about anything. We have talked openly about intimacy and the difference between that and giving in to an urge. We've talked about STD's and how important it is to protect yourself because trusting a liar could lead to a lifetime of misery. We've talked about the emotional component to sex and the fact that so many young men are sent a message from society that notches on their bedpost makes them "men." I'm blessed to have a great kid who makes intelligent decisions and though I know she'll have her fair share of heartache I know that I've helped to provide her with the foundation that I hope and pray will lead to her long term happiness. | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 3/27/2007 3:45:43 PM | "Did you accept and embrace your parental responsibilities by having a frank, honest and open discussion with them about sex or did you leave it to school counsellors, doctors, and Playboy? If you did...how difficult was it?"
We're a little bit more advanced over here. They learn all about it at primary school as part of the corriculum.
As people here don't have the silly Puritan culture hang ups there is no embarassment, hardly any immature sex jokes and less of those little mistakes during puberty.
It's a bit busy on here tonight isn't it? | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 3/27/2007 8:25:55 PM | | I don't think "the talk" is a one time thing. I think it should be ongoing. My kids and I have a very frank and open relationship. If they ask a question, they know they will get an honest, non-sugar-coated answer. They are 20 & 21 now and no grandbabies yet! | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 3/27/2007 8:45:35 PM | | I never actually had The Talk with my kids (15 &20), but I answered any questions they had along the way, plus they had sex-ed. in school, and would often ask me questions after a class. Thankfully, my daughter didn't have sex until she was 18, out of high school and on the pill, WWHHEEEWW. My son listens to Love Line sometimes and he tells ME stuff I'd rather not hear. I'm 100% sure he hasn't had sex yet, but I have told him the last couple of years to not be a fool, cover his tool, don't be a chump, cover your stump. When he was 4, he asked me if I'd ever breast fed him. When I answered no, he said "Can you do it now?" Little perv, lol. | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 4/3/2007 2:12:52 PM | | We had several talks through the years and their education was an on-going process. It was easier to give them a foundation and then build on it than try to have "The Talk" once. They were pretty well-education by the time they got grown. | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 4/3/2007 9:54:04 PM | I had on going talks with my daughters when they were teenagers. I insisted on at least 4 sit down at home dinners a week and often played card games and board games with them so there wasn't a pressure thing attached to discussions. That way anything from literature to boys could be talked about in a relaxed atmosphere. The only time I had serious lets sit down and talk about it talks was if one of them was having an issue that needed dealt with.
I also had a trick thing I did to get them to tell me things that they wouldn't ordinarily tell. I would be home when they got home from school and meet them in the living room. When they walked in I would say, "I already know about it, so you may as well tell me your side. I am not mad but I need to hear it from you". They would confess to all kinds of things. LOL. They do that to my grandchildren now. | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 5/1/2007 5:48:36 AM | My 11 year old son and i have been having "the talk" since he was 5. He knows all the correct body terms, knows what intercourse/oral sex is, knows all the functions of a womans body, such as menstration and child birth, and so on. I believe we need to tell our children the truth. My son has no problem coming to me and asking me anything, much better than the sex lessons i learned from my friends when i was a kid. He also knows enough, when the time comes, to ask me for condoms. The only time i froze up and couldnt answer his question was when at 7 he came home from school and asked me what a dildo was, after turning red, stammering and stuttering (and being terrified he would ask me if i had one....), i blurted out, "Go ask your Father!!" I found a great book for him, hes been reading it off and on since he was 7 or 8, called "The Whats Happening to my Body Book for Boys, by Linda Madaras. It addresses eveything a boy would awant to know and has sketches of male/female genitalia.
PS Our sex talk began when he came home from school at 5 and told me he knew what sex was...its when the mother and dad get under the quilts and fart and giggle...figured it was time, lol. | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 5/1/2007 6:31:50 AM | Kudos to parent's who do not allow there sexual hangups to transfer to there kids....
same as above...we had ours starting at 6, an open honest with just enough information to settle the questions and a clear explanation why kids need to speak to there parents rather then getting back lane information......arming your child with education allows them to hold there exploration of there own body in the first person and not allow anyone incuding me to
stop the natural progression of there individual sexuality...
to many parents try to defur the natural progression of kids discovering, making there sexuality a train wreck that society must deal....kudos to those who don't...in my opinion... | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 5/1/2007 7:38:37 AM | | Yes, I got that little chore with my stepson. Another benefit of blended families. Nice and clinical and mostly dealing with how to properly treat women. Lucky me, that time is approaching for my next son (thank god I don't have any girls!). I'm thinking about just making him watch "Talk Sex with Susan Johanson" on Oxygen. If that doesn't traumatize him nothing will. | |
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| Did you have ' the talk' with your teenaged children?
Posted: 5/1/2007 9:41:56 AM | | Ohhh yes...with my daughter..."They"...the professionals....Say talk to your kids...BUT they really don't want to hear it from Mom...You get the "ohhh mom" with rolling of the eyes...then mentally they go "lallalala - and cover their ears"....lol | |
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