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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/18/2006 8:11:18 AM | you are possessive --- this is not a good thing
if your cop partner was afemale your wife or other would have to put up with it right !!!
do not try and control EVERYTHING --- as a matter of fact stop trying to be controlling --period --- | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/18/2006 8:44:47 PM |  I got a question for all the ladies. I am talking to this woman who I really, really like  She says I am great with her kids, she fells safe and secure around me etc..., etc... BUT I don't "wow" her I don't excite her when we meet. In the end end, I am afraid that it will end like every other girl ... the famous "we are better just friends". My question is how do I wow her? | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/19/2006 3:57:01 AM | It's just too bad that this "thread" (like the trail of a killer) has gone cold!
In short, it is too bad you wrote your response so long ago, by this writing, Dovestreasure.
Because your answer is so OXYMORONIC as to be gosh-darn, almost just plain moronic.
You'd rather what? Tell us again.
(You'd rather have a...what?....nice guy in bed over any "bad boy"? You certainly aren't a dumb blonde, there, babe! You just plain is DUMB!)
The very definition of "bad boy" is what you want to take to bed, you skanky slut! | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/19/2006 4:19:09 AM | How do you "wow" a woman? Maybe the question should be, "How do you WOW an American woman?" You are just plain trying to find someone from the WRONG COUNTRY! Expand your horizons, a little. Be willing to "put yourself out there": I mean WAY out there! I, personally, have played the dating game in a very low-key way, since I got divorced a long time ago (almost before you were born).
From personal experience, I have met some very, very nice women from NON-MATERIALISTIC countries. (I had to put that in "caps", there, to focus your attention on what is good and what isn't). The USA is too filled with spoiled, materialistic people. Look outside the country, for at least awhile. You will be pleasantly surprised at what you find.
Russian women are looking for men who are kind, compassionate, and caring. (Their male "counterparts" are drunken womanizers and irresponsible, too: they [russian women] would love to have someone just like you).
Chinese women are at least a little similar to the Russian ladies: they are tired of men who have a wife and a girlfriend, on the side.
In fact, in any country of the world where there has been a supremely male-dominated (think "male-controlling") society, the women see American men as very, VERY attractive and desirable.
American women often think in terms of what Hollywood sees as the ideal. Nice guys are too smart for that. So, our American ladies will always get what they deserve, until they quit acting so spoiled and petulant and imperious and all of those good adjectives that a person can use.
I am not anti-American. I, personally, have "seen the light" and why continue to choose the "dark", when the light has shined! (If there are any American ladies out there who are not selfish and/or self-centered, you will certainly find the nice guy you seek...eventually)
To all of the self-centered Britney Spearss, Anna Nicole Simpsons, (Ashley Simpson and bigger sister, too), and ESPECIALLY the Paris Hilton types: you deserve the maggots that you get, you silly bimbos.
P.S: I do not actually care what American women think of me: I have met some pure Angelic Beings, from other parts of the world...and that is good enough for THIS nice guy.
(Rot in Hell, all of you American-women "Hollywood looney-tune wannabes".)
(If you got your head up your a*s, take it out....or just let it just BAKE up there!)
(I am not impressed with snotty-nosed, American beotches who think their boobs are their identity....did I say BIMBO once, already? . ) | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy? rcraft
Posted: 11/19/2006 4:31:30 AM | I, for one, hear that!
In fact, that woman sounds like another woman who posted, here, under this topic heading: she (this other woman) said that she would prefer taking a "nice guy to bed", rather than [taking] any "bad boy".
I guess the pea-brained bimbos don't know an OXYMORON when they see one! | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy? rcraft
Posted: 11/19/2006 4:48:25 AM | Ernst i agree with some of your points...
American women are expensive!! They expect a good time on your dime.
The Asaian woman i saw last was cheap by comparison...every other word in her vocabulary was five doller...five doller..you pay now..five doller
jk jk | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy? (To rf900flyer)
Posted: 11/19/2006 4:53:49 AM | To you: rf900flyer
This plenty-of-fish website has some really nice women: if you look for them in other parts of the world, I mean. (Don't get me wrong! I have written to some nice ladies from "these here United States", as they say)
But, to get a little different perspective, you might...I mean "just might"...be surprised to find that there are some real angels who live far away from the late, great decadent U.S. of A.
It is always refreshing to know that one is not the only nice person out there: that there are nice people (women), in the world, whose views on life and love are interestly similar to your own.
(But, you will not find many of them here, in the USA)
(Why "rummage around in an American dumpster" to find that discarded "gem", when you can sit down at a buffet table, with no rejects and throw-aways)
To American women: you have to quit being so shallow if you want true happiness, in life.
The nice guys are way too intelligent, for that!
(And, like rf900flyer--but unbeknownst to him--gents from the U.S. are not "stuck with" what is on their "American plate". There are now more options for American men than ever before!)
In business, they say that competition brings out the best, in those companies that are competing with each other. It is my "hope" (but I won't be holding my breath on it), that American women will see that they truly are "not all that much", in the eyes of U.S. guys who know that the whole world is now their "ocean":
and, the fishing is GOOD, guys!
__________________
To American men: never settle for second best! Go for the gold! | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy? (to:tradeblazer)
Posted: 11/19/2006 5:09:18 AM | I could be laughing, right now.
Sounds like a Vietnamese whore, to me: fi-doller..me want fiv-doller
(Just kidding. But, I am from the Vietnam-war era, so "Who Knew?")
But, all joking aside, like anything else, not all foreign women are "chicken-of-the-sea" tuna, either.
Some are just plain dead squid.
So, "caveat emptor"
(Buyer Beware)
_______________
To any and all, here: any "nice guy" who is a nice guy, indeed (and not a phony) will eventually find someone who is just the right nice lady, for them!
(It does take time and patience...something that "nice" people have and are willing to invest)
As the hick down the road always says, "There ain't no such thing as an instant friendship! Friendships are like flowers: they start out as a seed and must grow--with time, patience, and water and plant food."
And then the "hick from the sticks" continues: "And, iff'n you put beer on that thar tender flower seedling, it'll draw maggots. 'Cause maggots jes' love beer!"
Well, there you are! No wonder Paris Hilton has maggots all over her!
(In her case, it is probably something other than beer, though..... )
(Iff'n she is a maggot-head, the maggots will jes' love her!) | |
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| Do women really want.....? (To:belly18dancer)
Posted: 11/19/2006 5:38:08 AM | Well, you and Paris Hilton have more in common than can be seen at first blush!
You both are bimbos!
It only takes a spineless bimbo-woman to be able to work in (and to succeed in) corporate America, anyway.
Because she is only concerned about climbing the ladder that is "put out there in front of her, to climb!"
If that "ladder" were a [stripper] "pole", she---YOU---would most-certainly be working that pole, too!
It is in the nature of bimbos to do JUST THAT!
American bimbos are sooooo predictable!
P.S: When you ever decide to "buck the system", let me know.
(On second thought, any blonde bimbo beotch who talks about sex as freely as you do--I guess that, too, is part of the definition of "bimbo"--is not worth a second glance.)
You probably think the term "nice guy" means "nice in bed", or something.
(What a skank !!)
(You sound like that Vietanese-war era whore that propositioned the troops: "Fi-dollar, me want Fiv-doller"......the only difference, I'm thinking, would be the price!)
(My only response to you--like with that Viet woman, from many years ago--would be this: Get Lost, maggot!) | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/19/2006 6:42:04 AM | hey there suthrncharm
One problem that I see is what you put you are looking for...activity partner...that is why you are finding only promiscuous women...secondly..it is your age...men and women BOTH, your age range are still wanting to sow their oats and not wanting to commit to anything real...The problem is..even with age...women and men BOTH are afraid to commit to anything...I am not talking marriage and the white picket fence..I have become a realist and know that is not real that is a fantasy..a very rare thing to find in life...so many people pass up the real thing and never know what they have passed up because they never took the time to take a look at it...
I wish you well you do seem like a nice guy and nice guys don't ALWAYS finish last... | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/19/2006 8:02:17 AM | Unfortunately, EVERYONE (male and female) has been hurt and/or taken advantage of at one time or another. Also unfortunately, we sometimes end up getting bitter toward the entire opposite sex. I know this because I was there years ago. The only thing this accomplishes is that everyone can see how bitter you are and you can alienate everyone, potential dates, friends, family... There sometimes comes a time when you have to look back and say - was I doing anything to cause this pattern, and you may be surprised. You live and learn (hopefully). The way you feel about yourself definitely affects how others treat you.
Anyway, there are definitely people who are naturally givers or takers (or users). You do have to wait until you know someone before you give TOO MUCH (I'm not only referring to material things). You can give a little at a time until you see if it's appreciated. It shouldn't be too hard to tell. However, we do all get fooled occasionally. When emotions are involved, we ignore the warning signs our brains send us.
I know that I, for one, definitely want a nice, sweet, thoughtful, affectionate guy. However, I won't deny that there has to be some adventure and excitement involved. I also enjoy adding spice to a relationship, so it has to go both ways. And no, he can't be a total pushover - he has to have some confidence and backbone.
Also, attraction: Princely Frog, a page or two back, definitely stated it correctly as far as I'm concerned. He seems to know a lot about women (scary). There are a lot of things that can constitute physical attraction for a woman (at least for me). It has to be the whole package. A good-looking guy can make himself repulsive with the wrong attitude. Body language definitely comes into play, along with personality (must be funny and fun to be with), scent, taste HAS TO BE A GOOD KISSER (or at least potential).
I'm finally at an age where I know exactly what I want and won't settle for less.
So, there it is - there are many reasons why a woman wouldn't be attracted to a "nice guy," and it's not that we want to be treated badly (except women who really have issues). | |
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recon4
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Joined: 11/13/2006
Msg: 287 | |
| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/19/2006 9:37:36 AM | Girls and women alike are all looking for the same thing. They want the bad boys to date and the nice guys as friends. Reason being: when the so called bad boy screws up they can go running to the nice guy ( comfort man ) and "cry" on their sholder without the person telling them they should not deal with it and cut their losses. They don't want the guy that will remind them how stupid it is for putting up with the bad boy or how they brought it on themselves. They want some one that will help them push all the blame off on the other person, completely ignoring the fact that they too share in the responsibility of the situation. I spent 2 1/2 years in the USMC and they drill respect and honor into you. Every girl I have ever met says I am not "boyfriend" material and would better serve as a friend. They only want the respectful ones to comfort and baby them. Yet these very same girls are the ones saying that all men are "dogs". They are the ones that say all men are dishonest, unfaithful, and disloyal. They fail to admit that it is not all the men just the ones they choose. Thereby shifting the blame from their lack of judgement onto a generalization of how men "are". | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/19/2006 4:48:15 PM | Recon4's observations are generally true.
I stopped allowing myself to be put into the "Friend Zone".
If I have a romantic interest in a woman and it is not reciprocated completely, then I simply move on.
Google "Rules for Single Women" | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/20/2006 4:10:16 PM | Ok, Two Wheels - but if you're going to generalize for one gender, it can apply to the other, too.
Everyone has had people that they have preferred to keep as friends instead of a romantic interest, no? Sometimes, you can really like someone but not feel the physical attraction. Of course (now, I'll generalize) I've found that (most) men don't really like to waste time with women as friends. If they keep them as a friend, it usually means they're at least physically attracted to them. Do you disagree? | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/20/2006 4:13:31 PM | Hey, Two Wheels - I looked you up and was going to send you a message but you don't accept messages except from people who live close to you.
I was impressed that a "real man" was recite poetry - interesting. | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/21/2006 6:24:22 AM | It sounds like more than a few people on this thread have real issues with the opposite sex.....Ernst....why are you so angry at Treasure? Seems to me that with an attitude such as yours, it's no wonder women aren't wanting to date you....at least some women. Lighten the hell up, man! Yes, we've all had bad experiences.....it's not all just one gender that does specific injustices to the other. Even if statistics prove that one gender cheats more than the other or one gender tends to be more materialistic than the other.....we all have to put it into perspective as to who really conducts these statistical surveys......and who counts the votes. *LOL* I personally have been cheated on, lied to, made to feel guilty for someone else's mistakes and shortcomings....all things that both genders have experienced so it's not just a "man thing". And I am personally guilty of being a **** when the situation warrants it, in my own opinion of course. In most cases, the other person thought I was over-reacting.....and I very well could have been. But it's my shortcoming, and we all have at least one, right? *LOL*
Yes, women want a nice guy......and, yes, RF.....some men want a nice woman. But, as in most aspects of life, we all have preferrences. And then some of us don't really know WHAT we want. *LOL* | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/21/2006 9:34:26 AM | Everyone has had people that they have preferred to keep as friends instead of a romantic interest, no? Sometimes, you can really like someone but not feel the physical attraction. Of course (now, I'll generalize) I've found that (most) men don't really like to waste time with women as friends. If they keep them as a friend, it usually means they're at least physically attracted to them. Do you disagree?
There was a time when I would disagree. But with age has come some wisdom and enough personal experience to know that unless I have absolutely NO romantic interest in a woman, then being a friend was simply a frustrating experience.
I talk to alot of men about the "Friend Zone" issue. My observation is that any man who has suffered in that weird, platonic limbo eventually makes a conscience decision to stop being close friends with women. So, I do agree with your statement. | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/21/2006 9:36:49 AM |
Hey, Two Wheels - I looked you up and was going to send you a message but you don't accept messages except from people who live close to you.
I was impressed that a "real man" was recite poetry - interesting.
Sorry, I'll fix that regarding my mail.
That was not exactly poetry, but Shakespeare from Hamlet. Shakespeare spoke a great many essential and timeless truths that still resonate today. | |
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Daparo
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Joined: 11/4/2006
Msg: 295 | |
| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/21/2006 12:09:20 PM | Hi Yuletide
You are perfectly right. I am really surprised I am not the only one in this site to come to such conclusion. Educated men, well mannered, respectful to others is for most of the women in this site , like an extraterrestrial. Most of the women I met are real in search of BBD ( Big Bigger Deal ). I have to admit I am lost in this menagerie. Lie, greed and dishonesty is unfortunately the leitmotiv of most women in Plentyoffish.com. I am convinced Classy educated ladies can be found in Art gallery, Museum, Concert and Theatre Play. Easy to contact and chat with during the break. lets change strategies. Birds of a feather flock together. | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/21/2006 1:22:00 PM | The ranter on this page is correct on some points. You basically have 2 choices for the "nice guy" (me) you either continue to get hurt (me). Like he suggested dating outside of the country, or by sheer luck you find the non pretentious, non materialistic woman.
I haven't met too many women who want the nice guy, and you know having an attitude doesn't make you a "protector" my stature alone does that for me, however i am quiet, yet strong. I don't think it has anything to do with sexually.. I mean every person knows how "shy" people are sexually. And it's far from their social "shy quiet" style.
Maybe the time to find a woman is 30+ when they find out, how terrible their "**** jerky types " turn out in their 20's. | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/21/2006 4:23:20 PM | | It's funny.....statistically, according to the men on this forum, the women who want a nice sweet guy should be as scarce as hen's teeth. So, what are the odds of, say, 10 women, all wanting a sweet nice guy, being in the same place at the same time (such as, say, a singles picnic such as the one we just had this past weekend)? I'm sure you would say the odds were astronomically high that it would be impossible. Yet, it happened! I guess I witnessed a true miracle last Sunday. *LOL* And there were about the same amount of men there. The ones I talked to seemed extremely nice. I'm not sure how the dates went but I do know that at least 6 of these people paired up for dates afterwards. I'm beginning to love group get-togethers!!! | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/23/2006 3:00:12 AM | | iceviolet...when have you seen that?? how many guys have you given a chance to? womena re always saying that , and saying it, over , and over again. I dont personally know any guy that goes for the barbie doll type | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/23/2006 3:33:04 AM | *****iceviolet...when have you seen that?? how many guys have you given a chance to? womena re always saying that , and saying it, over , and over again. I dont personally know any guy that goes for the barbie doll type*****
Then you evidently don't go out to clubs and dances much. *S* I spend a lot of time at my favorite club because I have a lot of friends there and I am friends with the band. It used to really upset me a lot when I would see men my age or older pass right by women like me in favor of just a cursory glance from some cute little size 2 in tight jeans and belly-baring tee shirt. I mean, come on guys.....I see these men get rebuffed and rejected, laughed at and about, hear comments in the ladies room about how ridiculous these men are to even entertain the thought of being able to get a girl like them. These girls are looking for younger, buffer and/or richer men! In truth, I feel sorry for these guys....that kind of rejection is devastating sometimes.....but it doesn't seem to stop them from coming back time and time again to try with a different size 2. *S*
And, usually, when they succeed in bagging their prey, the girl just sticks around until the money is gone.........and this, people, is one of the reasons why we hear all these "gold digger" stories. *LOL* | |
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| Do women really want a nice guy?
Posted: 11/27/2006 6:19:23 AM | Yikes... Nice guys... Women very seldom look for the nice guy, and most often attracted to the bad boy or even dysfunctional boy. I suspect there are two simple reasons for this: 1) Women see the bad boy as fun and exciting. I think some have posted that they like that the bad boy has a wild side, and will spank them. Nice guys have the image that they will be stable, but boring. 2) Women like to be needed, and if a guy is bad (or dysfunctional), she can "fix him." Bad boys can have crap jobs, take drugs, and live with their parents and still be attracted. Better yet, he is someone who can be helped, and "changed" into the "one."
Case in point: I am new to Tampa, been here almost 5 months now. I have made some friends, but given my short time here, there are few people I know and call friends. I know three women who are spinning their wheels in a bad/dysfunctional relationship with a "bad boy." One is a masters level medical professional, who dates a guy who rents jet skis on the beach... never mind the fact that he gets stoned from time to time, and only calls her about once a week. She also fears that he will embarrass her in social settings, and she does not bring him to work functions. I think she pays most of the time too when they go out. Despite the hours of heartbreak, they are still together.
Another women I know works in finance, owns a condo, and has a comfortable lifestyle. She met a guy, feel in love with him, and within a short time they are making long term plans. However, after a couple of months (and she lending him several thousand dollars), she learned that he has another girlfriend, and they were in the process of buying a home together. Turns out he is unemployed, and is a convicted felon too. My fiend leaves him, and after a week apart, she misses him and he calls her to tell her that he misses her.... she wants to see him again. Never mind the fact that he scammed her for thousands, lied, is unemployed, has another girlfriend, and has a criminal history.
Case number three: A personal trainer, with an amazing body and personality; dating the bad boy who in here words "he drives me crazy" and "I cant stand him." Breaks up because all he ever wants to do is stay home and watch movies. He is a couch potato, she is a non-stop work-out machine and yet she is drawn to him. They broke up, he stalked her, and she took him back. Ten days later, she calls me for advice, I make some suggestions, the break up, and he begs... and here they are again. I got tired of the phone calls and asking me what she should do.... annoying....
So here I am, 37 y.o., extremely outgoing, above average looks, work with kids, have a stable career and a doctoral degree.... and I am single. I would be better off if I quite my job, move back home with mom, and stop returning phone calls.... I would get more attention I am sure. I suppose in the long run I may be better off, but in the short term it is very frustrating. | |
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