| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/22/2006 8:00:51 PM | Kitchen table crashing to the floor at 3 a.m. was a show stopper....but ohhhh so funny! Poor neighbours below.... | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/22/2006 8:24:18 PM | Yup. Before I married my ex.. Making out on an old, old antique iron bed that gave way in the middle of really great sex. The bed crashes to the floor (and I mean loudly) in the middle of the night.
He's laying on the bed, saying "its broken...its broken".
He was NOT referring to the bed. | |
|
Chrysi
|
Joined: 4/24/2006
Msg: 28 | |
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/23/2006 3:45:13 PM | | The cops shining their spotlight in the car window, yeah that pretty much kills it right there! | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/23/2006 4:02:45 PM | this one was a definate...
first time with this guy...
after having damn fine sex a couple of times that evening, we fell asleep.
morning came...started again...he gets up...goes to the closet...pulls out his brief case....
and pulls out the BIGGEST BLACK DILDO i've ever scene!
I was in TOTAL shock!
And he actually thought he was going to use that over used thing on me...EEEEWWWWW!! | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/23/2006 8:30:43 PM | Don't think if someone walked in while we were going at it would stop me and don't think it would stop most guys. Guess it depends on where I'm at on the "O" meter...the "closer" I am, the less I would care who saw and probably wouldn't even notice! Kind of a turn on, actually...
When I was 19, I was dating this guy that went to Rutgers. He looked like Lorenzo Lamas (back in the day), anyway, really HOT. He was on summer break from school and staying at the shore where I lived...we had been seeing each other for about 2 months. One night, after drinking a little too much, we were both hungry so we stopped at McD's...we then went back to my gf's place cuz I knew she wasn't home and we wanted to be alone (summer was almost over and it was gonna be our "first" encounter)...one thing led to another...I was on top and he was on the bottom...WELL, I am not a big drinker and all of the moving around we were doing kinda made me feel queasy...I threw up a Big Mac right in his face and on my gf's pink cashmere sweater...he said he would call me in the morning.
Why don't men call when they say they are gonna call???? | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/24/2006 12:24:06 AM | How about a dog's cold nose suddenly in your butt crack or a cat jumping from a shelf onto your back. Either of those will definetly take the starch out of your noodle. | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/24/2006 2:35:37 PM | | When your 16 and her mom walks in followed by her dad and he is followed by her grandma | |
|
| Show stoppers! Date Blunders........
Posted: 12/24/2006 4:40:12 PM | I have gone to numerous Blind dates in my younger years and now & to be honest you would not believe how some dates act when they are really either desperate or freaky......
-Some dates I have gone through flashes me, while we are either in their car or at the restaurant... because they were told by previous dates that the bigger the wee wee some chicks go for that.. well to be honest that is ONE RED FLAG that you know for sure that your date is just after one thing SEX then go to the next one...
-Some other ones,during sex tells u ahead that they havent had sex in so long so dont expect them to be longer than usual... I went on a date with one guy and we went on our 2nd date and we had sex he was done in like 10 seconds & i cant help but chuckle because it never happened to before ... he got really tick off I cant help it - I never had that happen to me before....
-Another one, is you are at a restaurant enjoying each other's company and a nice meal... the wife walks in the same restaurant with her friends and embarasses the crap on your date.
-Another one, your date forgot to mention that he is there with u under false pretenses that he is not the guy that u was supposed to meet - his friend paid him to come in his behalf because he is already in a relationship & the guy that is in front of u is available.
-During a plan date you go to walk in the park while strolling along Stanley Park seawall.... it starts to rain n you are at the other side of the park far away from the car when u are both soaking wet.... that was a classic....
-During sex....hmm another thing happen was when they brag how good they are in bed & when that time came.... he cant perform that was embarassing and also rather frustrating to say the least.
-During dinner....he forgot to mention his allergies.... they swollen up and u have to take them to the emergency for treatment that is rather scary and rather stupid to say the least..
and the lists goes on..... | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/24/2006 4:43:36 PM | | clickit13 after that throwing up incident that is why he didnt call...he was also after a booty call that is all there is.... | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/24/2006 8:50:17 PM | Pebbles 2006: Thanx so much for the insight! So THAT is why he didn't call? Cuz I threw up on him, huh? All these years I have always wondered...
Btw..."booty calls" don't wait 2 months to get the "booty". | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/24/2006 10:52:28 PM | once i was making love to a woman in a car when the police shined his light in the car, that kind of broke the mood.
Then Once I was having a go in the grass on a warm summer day when i was attacked by mosquitos, i had to stop and get in the back of the station wagon to finish up.
Once i was going down on a beautiful lady when my buddy opened the car door and told me her husband was coming to pick her up.
Another time I was just getting started pants down panties off , when her girl friend knocked on the window of the car and said her husband was on the phone. | |
|
| |
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/26/2006 5:05:03 PM | | adragonjeffy: Do I really have to explain it to you, too? It's a joke...I KNOW why he didn't call...I threw up on him...yeap, that's why...I puked in his face. I was poking fun at myself...the thread is called "show stoppers"...YES, the "show" stopped when I tossed my proverbial "cookies" all over him. In my defense, he DID call about 6 months later and we laughed about it...most importantly, I have never thrown up on another man since...OKAY?! | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/27/2006 7:42:49 AM | ... ummm clickit13... I got the joke silly.. That's why I thought it was funny!!.. See all those cute little smiley dudes up there smiling and laughing?!? LOL... Oy Vay lady! ..Thanks for explaining the obvious though. 
| |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/27/2006 4:16:16 PM | | adragonjeffy: Thanks for the personal explanation you sent to my inbox (was afraid to open that one, LOL!) and the thumbs up on the profile/pics...I now feel like a jackass for jumping all over you...chalk it up as just another "show stopper" for me...Sorry! | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/27/2006 4:26:07 PM | | I smacked my head off a wall so hard I blacked out for a few seconds, but I came around and kept going. Nothing can stop me! | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/27/2006 4:26:48 PM | | I smacked my head off a wall so hard I blacked out for a few seconds, but I came around and kept going. Nothing can stop me! | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/27/2006 9:17:55 PM | | You mean like farting and boob farts or the dog jumping on the bed? Nah, the show still goes on. | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 2:01:24 AM | This woman I went home with and she was riding me when I felt a little hand grabbing my toe and heard those immortal words "are you my new daddy?"
or
while on top with my butt naked to the world, my cat decides to jump on it with all four sets of claws....you could hear my girlfriend's scream across the neighborhood from the rapid downstroke.
or
at my grandma's house, I told her I was not feeling well and my girlfriend decided to go down on me to raise my spirits and in walks granny with chicken soup......the look was priceless, the apologizing was forever. | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 3:04:39 AM | | Yeap, he farted and it ended it. | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 4:25:39 AM | Once, many moons ago, I was with a man who, let's just say, hadn't reached maturity,
We had gotten in the standard missionary, I'm thinking things will heat up a bit, then all of a sudden he starts just a rockin and rolling, faster and faster, then it happened, he looked up and asked if I was ready to...., much to my surprise, I wasn't even aware we had started.
I couldn't help myself, as hard as I tried not to, I started laughing, and I couldn't stop. All this time he thought he was doing me some good, he hadn't even entered and was dry f*cking the sheets.
Yep, show stopper for sure! Needless to say, I never saw him again til many yrs later, even then he wouldn't talk to me. | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 4:53:29 AM |
It's like gettin smacked in grill with a dirty diaper.
Dude you are my hero!! | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 5:05:06 AM | this one is not at all funny but it stopped the show for sure
guy i was living with pulled a loaded gun out form under the pillow during sex and put it to my head. Thought it would be a turn on.
FVCKING IDIOT | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 7:00:46 AM | | LOL THIS IS FUNNY ,, MAKES ME THINK OF A TIME M N A EX HAD AT A LAUNDROMAT IN THE BATHROOM WAS HOT N STEAMY TILL I PUT HER ON THERE CHINSY ASS CHEAP SINK ,, WELL IT FELL OFF THE WALL W HER ON IT ... BROKE IN PIECES .. LUCKLY SHE WAS UNHURT ,,, I STOOD PANTS DOWN 2 ANKLES IN SHOCK AS WATER SPRAYD ALL OVER.. REALLY ENDED THE SHOW QUICK I MUST SAY... THE BEST IS WHEN WE WENT IN, THE MAT WAS EMPTY N WHEN WE WALKED OUT OF THE BATHROOM THERE WERE PEOPLE STARING AT US LMAO | |
|
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 7:25:28 AM | | yea once when me and the ex -i turned round -as he seemed to have suddenly vanished - to see he was falling off the bed tumbled across the other side of the room landed in the corner on his knees and pulled the curtains down on himself all i could see was his bum -i PMSL too much to carry on after that ! | |
|
Home
login 
