| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 8:26:14 AM | | This gals mom walked in her room as I was just cummin' in her mouth. Her mom was wanting for her to talk to her, but Lindesy wouldn't swallow. She just held it in her mouth. Made me gag. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 8:50:22 AM | I dated a girl for almost 4yrs, never ONCE did either of us openly fart in front of eachother. Well Doggy possition isnt the best of coming out possitions if ya know what I mean...
Anyhow, sex was done for that night... | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 10:29:34 AM | | on a picnic table in a public park in broad day light. you hear someone and your zipping back up. around the path comes an elderly couple. yea that stopped the show for about 5 minutes. till they got on past and back on the table she went dress pulled up and finished the job. lol i had so much back up pressure i shot that goo all over her face from down below. she didnt have time to get down and swallow. bout that time here comes the elderly couple again. here she is with jizz all over her face. just as i looked at the couple i hadnt even gotten zipped back up. they both smiled and the old lady snickered. i and this girl both was embarrassed to say the least.... oh those ways the days. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 10:34:30 AM | Had a serious foot cramp once! lol and those hit fast and ur foot curls, and i had to throw her off to the side and grab my foot! talk about scaring the crap outa her! lol She's like "what did I do?" and I was like "OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!" lolol
And one other time...can't believe i'm saying this but.....during sex once, she was riding me and hard and fast and next thing you know she slightly poppoed off and on the wey down...... BEEEEEEEEND !!!! I yelled!!! And she flew off me and it felt like it broke in two!!! see...with a slight curve that is always a possiblity lol......oh man I will never forget that pain, I thought it broke! lol I think we tried to continue but I had to give it a bit of recovery time lol.... | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 12:25:37 PM | Gad, I remember this girl, I waited two months for a taste of her Grade As. When the night finally arrived, though, she started explaining all her jokes to me, even the simple ones, and laughing, laughing. I think that may be why, when she mounted me later, that she blew chunks all over me and some pink polyester rag of her roommate's.
Which was a real problem for me, because I'd been banging her roommate for the last six weeks, just to, you know, let off some steam while m'lady made up her mind about me.
I got out of there, and I never called either one of them again. I'm sure I don't have to explain.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Then there was the prim little sweetie, or so I thought, who fluttered and sighed like a magnolia blossom in a hurricane. Out of nowhere, as I'm sprinting toward a big finish, she asks me, "Can my boyfriend fcuk you sometime? Can I watch?" Quick like a bunny I looked behind me and then got out of there.
Oh! Once we split my old waterbed wide open! Suddenly, we're swimming, laughing, and fcuking all at once. I guess that's OT, since we didn't stop right away, but she did go home after towelling off. Does that count?
Cheers!
Vulf  | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 12:34:08 PM | | OMG! One time i was having sex with this guy and he asked me to stick my finger up his ass while i was giving him head, and I'm sorry but no way what was he gay or something? That's too much normally I'm pretty open but man was that a real show stopper! | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/28/2006 1:01:14 PM | Telling a girl that she is good, but her sister does that neat thing with her tongue... the fastest and best way to end a relationship!
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/30/2006 12:10:49 PM | Sheildvulf: OMG! After all these years!!! Is it really YOU?? Doesn't really look like you, but, hey, the years aren't always good to us all, right?
Ya know, I KNEW you were banging my gf! I told her she could! It's a funny story! Ya want me to explain??????
 ------> | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/30/2006 12:20:47 PM | A friend of mine went home with someone and while he was F*#&# her ( Military ) her son who was about 4 or 5 at the time came in the room and jumped on his back. The Kid was screaming WooooHoooooo and the sick bass terd kept going.......... never stopped
Now thats CLASSIC | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/30/2006 12:31:31 PM | well, I farted in his face(it was an accident)
so,what was the problem? I said excuse me...... | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/30/2006 12:42:44 PM | | Why stop! You should have gave him the best site ever! One that he would only be envious of! ;o) | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/30/2006 2:19:58 PM | lol jos, they have a 'spot' there kinda like the g-spot you have, stimulating that is meant to be like 'wow' for men :P
lol at the modified power slam :) | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/30/2006 9:36:01 PM | @ susette, even the mental image of that made me LMAO!!  | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/30/2006 9:40:02 PM | | I had a woman start crying during orgasm. She said she always does it. Crazy. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 12/30/2006 10:23:57 PM | SInce i don't mind embarassing myself............... Satin sheets and silk boxers do not mix .... try jumping in a bed like that someday and see if you don't slide right across and off the other side just like I did.
laff close to the the crying how about the ones that after a few start passing out ...... first time that happened I thought I had kiled the poor girl..... and had no idea how to explain F-ing someone right to death to the cops till I noticed she was still breathing | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 1/3/2007 11:41:13 PM | Hehehe, Clickit
Man, I'm glad none of that gross stuff has ever happened to me  | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 1/4/2007 2:10:38 AM |
Have you ever had anything happen during sex that just stopped everything dead? Like someone walking in, the other person saying something just plain crazy, or injuring yourself? Maybe them doing something that you did NOT like that freaked you out? Just curious here.
Right after my marriage ended I met a girl who worked at a bank. She looked like your typical girl next door type. We went out a couple of times and on the third date she invited me to her home. After having drinks she led me down to her basement and to my shock she had a dungeon down there. There were all kinds of whips and chains hanging on the wall. She had this huge rack that you stretch people on and she even had a cage. Turns out she was into bondage and discipline. She tried talking me into putting on a collar and some handcuffs and it totally freaked me out. I'm one who likes to try new things, but this sort of thing doesn't appeal to me. Needless to say I never saw her again. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 1/4/2007 7:09:01 PM | | I was dating this girl once who had an insatiable sexual appetite. It was a new realationship, and we were totally engulfed in each other, having sex like 3 or 4 times a day. Anyway at one point we made love all night long, and I tried to go to work the next day. I was only planning to work 8 hours, but ended up working 12, and at the time I was working maintanence in a factory, so it made for a pretty long day. I got home off of work and she met me at the door kissing me and unbottoning my shirt. No need to tell you where that led. We were right in the middle of making love, with her on top, and I fell asleep. She literally wouldn't talk to me for a week. Moral of the story is, if you want to have a great sex life, always have enough stamina to keep up with your partner. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 1/4/2007 7:09:56 PM | She had a hershey squirt once... did it for me ... Not fun... not kewl!
Oh yea... my mom caught me jerkin off when i was about 15... kinda ruined the moment... if you know what i mean. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 1/4/2007 7:32:17 PM | Maybe I just needed a good laugh but many of these had me giggling helplessly, some had me gagging..
An ex and I were doing it on her trunk lid in the middle of a field, 1\2 mile from any road and I was close to the moment when, I looked up and out of a draw 4-500 yards away these 5 people came riding on horseback. I gauged there was enough time to finish and there was ... but not quite enough time for her to get her clothes on. Some people sure can't take a joke. The riders thought it pretty funny. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 1/4/2007 8:48:33 PM | I had a really old toyota and my GF and I where getting to it and at some point I started to realize my foot was stuck in the heater vent. And I mean stuck it was wedged in tight I,m stuck on top of her and that ended the fun. In the end the heater got broke my ankle got all scatched and we never tryed it in the yota ever again.  | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 1/17/2007 9:32:16 PM |
I had a really old toyota and my GF and I where getting to it...
See, that's what happens when you buy a foreign car. Buy American! hee hee | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 1/18/2007 1:31:03 AM | | When he said, " I want to suck your a$$hole so bad, c*nt ". He thought it was sexy...I obviously didn't. I stopped dead on my tracks, looked at him in that appalled way. He looked like he snapped out of it and didn't realize what he did. He was like, " What? Omg..what did I do ? "....I felt like Charlotte in Sex and the City when she had that high class guy she was doing, who would break out into the dirtiest talk that would make an uncouth sailor blush! | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 1/18/2007 4:05:03 AM | Ladies, I didn't I needed to tell you, but PLEASE ask before inserting anything (finger, dildo, shampoo bottle, etc.) into your man's backside. Nothing stops the show more than someone doing something behind someone's back. Its in your best interests to keep him free from distraction.
If you are under the impression that all men are just waiting for you to "spice up the bedroom" with that manouever but are afraid to ask, or that we'll love it once you "show us the way" let me correct you now.
Where are you getting this misinformation? Cosmo? Showcase Diva? Let me know so I can write the appropriate letters. | |
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