| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/1/2007 2:38:03 AM | Hmmm...well,
My Ex neglected to tell me that she was on her period one day, I started to go down on her, removed her panties, and I see a tampon...EWWW...she was more embarrassed than I was because she had forgotten, she got so caught up in the moment...
Another,
In the middle of getting a blow job from my ex...When who decides to just open up the door and come on in...her mom...now, my ex did the first thing that came to her mind, to jump up from her knees and jump onto me to cover me up (I’m laying on the couch...while my privates are at attention) I swear, I was about to cry from the pain...her mom didn't see anything...and I couldn't feel anything for the next week.
Another,
at my ex's house, under the covers, getting hot...undressing and touching, all the sudden, it felt as if my toe had gotten caught in a bear trap, I look down, there is her cat, using my toe as a chew toy...OWW...ruined the mood completely, for about 5 seconds...
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/1/2007 3:18:35 AM | "Of course, I was 17 she was 18....we were parked and having a good time in the back of my '73 Ford Pinto the back seats folded down...windows fogged up....THEN the knock of a nite stick on the window from Officer Friendly. Yep that did it!"
Haha yes... being interrupted by the boys in blue is not fun! | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/1/2007 4:42:45 AM | Have you ever had anything happen during sex that just stopped everything dead? Like someone walking in, the other person saying something just plain crazy, or injuring yourself?
Fortunately I've never had anything happen during sex that stopped the action dead. I think the craziest thing anyone could say would be if a woman were to walk in on her husband while he's having sex with another woman and him saying "honey it's not what you think!"  | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/1/2007 6:03:13 AM | My worst show stopper experience was a woman who was *EXTREMELY* self-conscious about her body appearance (I thought she was quite lovely with a beautiful face, a very nice upper torso but wider hips and thighs) and insisted on not having any lights on... I was enjoying my fourth recovery period of the night when she decided to reposition and climb on top of me. Unfortunately, her right leg came up (in the process of re-positioning) and she inadvertently kneed me pretty hard in the groin... which resulted in excrutiating pain on my part and an end to any more fun... The following morning, I was still extremely tender and was not in a mood to continue on. She didn't understand why I was hobbling around still until the afternoon...
Another woman I had the pleasure of enjoying intimate moments with was mildly narcoleptic... whenever she got overstimulated, she went completely limp for three to eight seconds or so, only to wake up with a start. The first time it happened, it freaked me out (as I was mid-stroke in!). When she came to, I asked her what had happened and she explained. It then became a repeated goal for us to strive for in all of our subsequent encounters!   | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/1/2007 6:47:11 AM | my story is not gross...but it did hurt.
with my ex, going at it full tilt, came out a liitle to far...a BANG right into the pubic bone...OUCH, done.
another time in the woods on the gofl course...we went to "look" for her lost ball but she wanted a quicky, so up with her skirt and down with the panties, in i go... then i hear "FORE" and i get hit in the back by a golf ball...again, OUCH, done. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/1/2007 8:18:58 AM | OMG! This thread is very funny!
Here's one that happened to my former neighbors...
They owned the two story Victorian across the street from me which was a former convent for the local Catholic Church (no lie!). The home is surrounded by large old oak trees. My friends who shall remain nameless but ID'd as D & M were working on the short roof under a second story window. M decided it would be fun to have a little fun while hanging out the window. M began banging D as she sat on the window sill, on the second story under the oak trees.
Little did they realize that my nearest neighbor on the north side of the street who is a devout Baptist was working in his yard and saw what they were doing!!! It didn't exactly stop the show but D was mortified to see him looking up at her and M!!!
I couldn't stop laughing when she confessed it all to me. She never could look at that neighbor again!
Another funny is they put up a fence because they claimed I was watching them from my home across the street. In truth, I would call over and I could actually see from my bedroom through their sun porch, down the hall and into their kitchen. Sometimes, they would be fooling around, but usually just cooking. I always greeted their answering with "Are you having sex right now or can I come over?"
:) | |
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smyllz
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Joined: 11/1/2006
Msg: 107 | |
| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/1/2007 11:26:26 AM | - in the heat of the moment, he just undid his zipper and we got to it.....he had to stop and couldn't do anything for about a week afterwards, because the "zipper-burn" was too bad
- the condom wouldn't stay on, so he kept pulling out to "adjust" it and eventually I wasn't in the mood anymore | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/12/2007 11:09:58 PM | a girl friend and I was having spontanous sex on an off ramp when a police officer pulled up behind us and got out of his car and said "is everything alright" with a big grin on our faces we said "sure is"
he left and we finished | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/13/2007 1:13:42 PM |
Ladies, I didn't I needed to tell you, but PLEASE ask before inserting anything (finger, dildo, shampoo bottle, etc.) into your man's backside. Nothing stops the show more than someone doing something behind someone's back. Its in your best interests to keep him free from distraction.
ahhh.... so we aren't allowed to make the "suprise" but men think they have every right to?!?!
un-fair
my stupid ex has ruined doggy for me forever
i hope he gets a suprise like that one day.... Karama sucks | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/13/2007 1:26:51 PM | | was asked (during sex) if i was interested in inviting a friend, i realise its most blokes dream to spit roast a girl but when its a long term girlfriend askin if a friend could join in, it's a bit much! | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 2/13/2007 3:15:30 PM | OMG, I am laughing so hard at this thread!
I had not one but two things happen during one occasion. I had a guy over, we were on the couch making out, getting things started, when I felt another tongue on my hand - sure enough, my dog had come up behind him and was licking my hand to get my attention! (Nothing kinky there - he just needed out!) I let him out, then gave him a big chew bone to keep him occupied. Things got hotter and heavier and just as the main event was about to start, the phone rang. This was late at night so I had to answer, since it was a time where people generally don't call unless it's an emergency. No emergency - just a very drunken friend of mine wondering why I wasn't answering my cell phone! 
-Needless to say, when we finally did seal the deal a few months later, it was NOT at my house! | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/15/2007 4:05:42 PM | I totally agree with the not waiting thing if all its going to be is a booty call then have atter.
real show stoppers is my ex was working at a car wash and it was really late one night, so i decided to stop by and "visit" well we were in the back room and just as the climax was about to happen all we heard the door open and in walked his boss. Ya explain that to a bunch of gas jockeys the next morning.. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/15/2007 4:30:32 PM | The man who wanted to see me squirt then vomitted when it happened. And people wonder why I have the name I do.....
!! | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/16/2007 12:13:58 PM | | Just momentarily when I was 18. I was going down on this girl and she started squerting on my face. I thought it was pee for a second or two until I clued in. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/16/2007 2:56:33 PM | | Ex was busy down south once,and got stung on the a$$ by a hornet! That killed it (mood and the hornet after that) | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/16/2007 7:22:53 PM | I had a date using a vibrator on me one night.... he was having fun, I was having FUN.... and his cell phone goes off (he had it on vibrate). It just happens to be in the pocket of his jeans which were on the floor.... I have hardwood floors in my apartment so it was quite loud. Needless to say..... I busted out laughing...... everything was vibrating.... the toy ... me.... and the phone !!!!! lololol
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/16/2007 8:04:58 PM | Have you ever had anything happen during sex that just stopped everything dead
Recently I had sex stopped cold before even starting when I saw a this woman naked who I wish I hadn't ....OMG!!!!
Does that count?
Maybe it's just me but I get turned off by large women | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/16/2007 8:32:41 PM | | Ok The guy and I had been making out for like a hour, just touching and kissing ect.... Well we go to the room the guy whom I had dated for awhile asks me to tie him up and use my BOB on him. That took care of why he was so femanine acting. I was like .. uh no and you can go now. | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/17/2007 8:53:27 PM | Well, it didn't stop the action, but I got the "zipper burn" mentioned a few messages about. Taught me a lesson about having sex while wearing a flight suit.
Also, not having actual sex, but making out pretty heavy in the****it of a C-130 and hearing the maintenance troops open the crew entrance door. For those that don't know, that's about 8 feet away from where we were at. I really busted my knee on the nav table!! | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/18/2007 3:16:19 PM | beanzie... speaking for this large woman, trust me hunny... feeling is mutual and thats with your clothes ON....
:-)  | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/26/2007 8:49:27 AM | | I remember once, with my ex, we were at it rather..erm..energetically? Then we decided i should flip over to all fours, so he goes to get up and I start to turn over..ended up knocking myself out on his knee...split my head open, needed five stitches...trips to the hospital ALWAYS ruin the night lol | |
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| Injury
Posted: 6/26/2007 9:25:34 AM | if you want a real show stopper, try splitting your banjo string then to add insult to injury having to walk past your entire family to get to the bathroom. so much for al fresco!! | |
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| Injury
Posted: 6/26/2007 9:45:12 AM | | aback at high school my mom court me and the same girl 2 times in the matter the 2 monthes girrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr | |
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| Show stoppers!
Posted: 6/27/2007 2:10:49 AM | | show stoppers how about watching your man watching a porn while hes doing you and then moans out his ex's name | |
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