| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/6/2007 7:05:18 AM | Okay men and women. Can everyone explain what their deffinition of a nice guy/girl is? I think there is a wide range of difference of what some call a nice guy.girl. Okay I will start this off. Please do not condemn me for my answers, this is my personal preferances. If I say anything offensive then you can call me on it.
Coming from my personal point of view.
I like a gentle(man) not a boy.
I like him to be romanic and affectionate
Open doors, etc.
Ask me how i feel, and wants open communication
get me a card or flowers for no reason
compliment me once in a while
be open and honest
not be self absorbed
Not put me down/call me names
not lead me on and dump me with out an explination
be interested in all of me not just my body.
Comfort me when I am hurting or sick.
Don't tell me you love me if you don't mean it.
Don't presure me to have sex if I am not ready yet.
Don't assume I can read your mind.
Now this should work both ways in a relationship. It should not be one sided.
Bonnie | |
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lisa7
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Joined: 5/21/2006
Msg: 127 | |
| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/6/2007 8:18:10 AM | | Well said Bonnie! That is exactly what I am looking for. Lately though, it seems all I get are guys who seem good at first but the talk always go back to sex, sex, sex. What ever happened to a nice conversation?? I'd love to know where all the good guys are. | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/6/2007 10:10:33 AM | guys who seem good at first but the talk always go back to sex, sex, sex.
No offense meant at all- maybe they're just trying to see if they are going to get a lemon in bed. I know- at my age -a woman's sexuality is a deciding factor in whether or not I want to date. ("A" factor not "THE" factor)
This doesn't mean she has to put out or have a ton of experience, but If a woman isn't sexually in touch with herself (and/or isn't willing to learn or grow) then how will she ever be happy with me sexually and vice versa.
Depending on personalities and chemisrty, finding this out about each other can be as blunt as asking "So what do you prefer sexually?" to something as simple as flirtatious conversation or even as subtle as body language. A person's posture says ALOT.
Just because a man can't subtley broach the subject with some tact or class, doesn't mean he's NOT a nice guy... he's just got a little caveman in him ;-)
-MoS83 | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/6/2007 1:17:50 PM | Yea But ManO.. can we get passed a cup of coffee first.. BEFORE they ask us what our favorite position is.... I mean call me old fashioned..but EEESSSSSSSHhhhhhhhh guys c'mon.
I know if a man who I initially think is educated and someone I would like totalk to, starts asking me stupid questions before he as met me... it sets off ALL my WARNING ALERTS. | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/6/2007 1:58:22 PM | (Yea But ManO.. can we get passed a cup of coffee first.. BEFORE they ask us what our favorite position is.... I mean call me old fashioned..but EEESSSSSSSHhhhhhhhh guys c'mon.
I know if a man who I initially think is educated and someone I would like totalk to, starts asking me stupid questions before he as met me... it sets off ALL my WARNING ALERTS.)
Me too Justjanicre. I had a guy that was so nice at first then he started talking about what was I waring, color of my bra/undies. I was like whowa. He was so perverted I hung up on him.
Bonnie | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/6/2007 3:23:22 PM | | It's amazing all these testimonies about women being asked sexually explicit questions so early on in the dating process. I've never done anything like this within the first 4-8 weeks of any relationship I've EVER been in and yet I've been kicked to the curb because her heart wasn't in it. But none of my actions or thoughts would suggest disrespect or being perverted. Guess I became dis-interesting because I didn't talk about sex. But then when I guy does, he's labeled a pervert/pig. What this suggests is sex talk/intimacy needs to be instigated by the woman when she feels ready or else we get dumped or put in the dog house. That's what all this tells me. | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/6/2007 5:27:20 PM | Like I said before sex is just apart of a relationship , and it can be a good part
but first you have to start somewhere, not sure about the 4-6 week thing,
but yea you have be friends, and thing s have to grow where you trust eachother
but if thing s don t grow then the relationship is dead, | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/6/2007 8:42:07 PM | Okay...maybe somebody answered this already, but screw that...answer it again....
I realize how everybody is kinda sorta hinting towards GUYS being in the wrong for asking chicks ANYTHING in the area of sex...
Well if guys are looked at as pigs, perverts, cavemen, and all these other things for doing it...what do you call the CHICKS who do it?
And don't give me that crap about them being strong-willed, confident, or ANY other compliment you can think up...because it goes both ways....
If guys are every bad term that comes to mind when they bring up sex....what are the chicks that do it....
I HAVE TO see the answers to THIS ONE... | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 7:06:34 AM | iwalkalone I can't help but notice you seem to have a chip on your shoulder and are very defensive. The facts speak for themselves. Men have a much stronger sex drive than women that is the way we were made. I have no control over that. Most OF THE SEX CRIMES COMMITED IN THE WORLD ARE MEN. IF YOU CAN PROVE OTHERWISE PLEASE BE MY GUEST. Now getting to your question. Unless the women is some sort of sexed crazed nympho most women do not talk about sex till they get to know the guy. Another known fact women want to be liked for who they are not how good they are in bed. A good women can satisfy a man just as good as as bad girl and vice versa but good guys and girls, don't feel the need to flaunt their sexusal desires until the time is right. For the most part every human being has a sex drive unless there is something medically wrong with them. But like I said in a meaningful lasting relationship there should be mutual respect for each other about intimate things. thats called having self control.
Bonnie | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 7:17:25 AM | studly sex can be discussed by both sexes if they agree the time is right. Both will know when that is. If both feel comfortable with each other and feel there are sparks, chemistry, feelings, then each can share thier likes about sex and so on. Why should a women have to talk or give out sex if the man has no feelings for her? Thats just plain animial sex and not condusive to a real meaningful relationship.
Bonnie | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 7:22:35 AM | Okay I have to step in here.
Men do not have a stronger sex drive then women that is patently false. Biologically that drive strikes at different periods but it is equal. Men start at 18 most women start at 35 variations exisist for all cases but its a good generality.
Second it is much more accurate to say Most of the sex crimes REPORTED in the world are committed by men. There are no ways to verify what crimes are not reported, and culturally men are reluctant to report abuses committed on them or by women. That is not to say its not possible that Most are committed by men merely that currently it is not a fact in evidence.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled debate. | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 7:38:15 AM | Sorry fireking but any dr will tell you men think about sex alot more often then women that is why they have wet dreams I guess. Most honest mature men will admit men can be aggresive and over board about sex,and even be a jerk. Why do fathers tell their dauthers that men can be pigs and to be careful. Why do fathers feel the need to protect their daughters from men? I would love to hear your answer fireking.
Bonnie | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 7:51:02 AM | Walk alone... yes ineed there is a word that is used for a woman that would talk about her what panties she's wearing, what her preferred sexual position is , or wondering how large the size of a mans penis is.... ON THE FIRST communication barely knowing each others first names...... that word put simply is.. SLUT.  | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 8:46:57 AM | | its fireknight lass. And yes men can be more aggressive but thats not the conversation.. the conversation was that women don't have as much drive and that is false. What is true is that it falls off to a nurture mode after a steady relationship occurs.. but before that or afte that relationship disoloves it goes back up | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 12:35:13 PM | Unless the women is some sort of sexed crazed nympho most women do not talk about sex till they get to know the guy. Another known fact women want to be liked for who they are not how good they are in bed. A good women can satisfy a man just as good as as bad girl and vice versa but good guys and girls, don't feel the need to flaunt their sexusal desires until the time is right.
bonbons, how many women have you dated? Alot of confident women are both aware of and use their sexuality upon first meeting a man. Have you been to a club lately- have you seen some of these outfits?
Why do you put on make-up? Why do women wear clothes that work well with their body-type? I would say it's for the benefit of men most of the time. [Although, I have heard convincing arguments that this type of behavior is actual about female-female competition]
Sex is always around us and unfortunately is often associated with negativity, and an oppresive male-centric society. Good guys and good girls are both sexual beings- all humans are! How soon it comes up and to what degree has nothing to do with the quality of one person or the other -(i.e. how "good" the guy is) -and frankly it doesn't have to do with the type of relationship either is looking forbut really the biggest factor is the UNIQUE chemistry between two people, two sexual beings.
That being said, you can tell alot about a man in the manner in which he brings it up and HOW IT MAKES YOU FEEL. (Was he in tune with you enough to know whether or not you would be comfortable braoching the subject?) Because I guarantee you, If during your FIRST conversation, you found yourselves really into each other and maybe a little turned on (be it mentally, emotionally or yes even physically ::gasp:: yes, it happens with some younger folk...!), and he picked up on this and with some class and subtly dropped in a double entendre and you both picked up on it and smiled and blushed- that "complaint" would never make it to this forum.. He wouldn't be a "pig" and you wouldn't be a "sex crazed nympho" | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 12:59:54 PM | Why do you put on make-up? Why do women wear clothes that work well with their body-type? I would say it's for the benefit of men most of the time. [Although, I have heard convincing arguments that this type of behavior is actual about female-female competition]
THAT's IT... I'm throwing away my makeup, my cloths, my bras and all my jewelry so I can walk around looking like a bag lady!!!
Ahhhhhhh sooooo much pressure to be a WOMAN!!
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 2:42:31 PM | hey just you could throw away your make-up, you could throw away your fancy
clothes and underware, it wouldn t matter your still looking good, its just a shame
you don t live in the Bronx, | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 3:38:45 PM |
iwalkalone I can't help but notice you seem to have a chip on your shoulder and are very defensive. The facts speak for themselves. Men have a much stronger sex drive than women that is the way we were made. I have no control over that. Most OF THE SEX CRIMES COMMITED IN THE WORLD ARE MEN. IF YOU CAN PROVE OTHERWISE PLEASE BE MY GUEST. Now getting to your question. Unless the women is some sort of sexed crazed nympho most women do not talk about sex till they get to know the guy. Another known fact women want to be liked for who they are not how good they are in bed. A good women can satisfy a man just as good as as bad girl and vice versa but good guys and girls, don't feel the need to flaunt their sexusal desires until the time is right. For the most part every human being has a sex drive unless there is something medically wrong with them. But like I said in a meaningful lasting relationship there should be mutual respect for each other about intimate things. thats called having self control.
There's a big difference between being defensive / having a chip on your shoulder...and being DIRECT. Lets get THAT PART straight...
Secondly...everything you said is pretty much shot full of holes. And like YOU said, the facts speak for theselves. Chicks wanna be liked for who they are and not their sex drive? I have an idea...how about we not talk about you and your friends in your circle and lets widen the picture a bit...if that were the case, Victoria Secret would be one BROKE @ss broad right now, there would be NO SUCH THING as thongs, video chicks, strippers, and anything else under the sun that brings to life that old corny phrase I hate to death: SEX SELLS...
Oh yeah, and lets not forget about IMPLANTS....
Come on now...
Now, I'll agree with you about guys having a higher sex drive. But one thing you will NOT get me to sit at the same table with you with is that whole yip yap about most of the sex crimes in this world are by guys...because not only is that biased and somewhat defensive on YOUR part, but once again, you have that tunnel vision again. Have you been watching the news lately? The number of these sleezy broads having sex with their 13 and 15 year old students are on a scary rise...and that's just TEACHERS. It disgusts me either way, no matter WHAT gender that person is... | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 3:42:02 PM |
studly sex can be discussed by both sexes if they agree the time is right. Both will know when that is. If both feel comfortable with each other and feel there are sparks, chemistry, feelings, then each can share thier likes about sex and so on. Why should a women have to talk or give out sex if the man has no feelings for her? Thats just plain animial sex and not condusive to a real meaningful relationship.
You're talking about RELATIONSHIPS....don't you think it's possible to talk about sex just for the hell of it?
I mean, come on...chicks seem like they're trying to catch up to the dumb things that guys do. I'm not saying that talking about sex is dumb...but if it bothers the female population so much, why the hell are they sitting there trying live the words of another song I hate: "Anything you can do, I can do better"?
Chicks don't wait for any signs to talk about sex. They don't wait for any vibe either. Widen the picture more.... | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 3:56:51 PM |
Sorry fireking but any dr will tell you men think about sex alot more often then women that is why they have wet dreams I guess. Most honest mature men will admit men can be aggresive and over board about sex,and even be a jerk. Why do fathers tell their dauthers that men can be pigs and to be careful. Why do fathers feel the need to protect their daughters from men? I would love to hear your answer fireking.
Okay...maybe she was under the influence when she typed THIS ONE out...
How about you ask why parents try to protect their kids IN GENERAL. Or how about, why do babies pop out after roughly 8 months or so....some things are common sense.
You no longer have the leverage to call anybody defensive after THIS reply...
Fathers are always gonna protect their girls because they know what guys CAN be like...not necessarily what a guy is gonna do next unless HE KNOWS THE TYPE...and for the most part...fathers WILL know the type. We've been there and done that alreday, so we KNOW what's waiting for our daughters. This is kind of a dumb question...
I mean, who would YOU rather talk to about guys then? Another female...who is more than likely already going through some garbage with a dude already? Or a female shrink who has ABSOLUTELY no idea what it means to BE a guy? | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 4:00:13 PM |
Walk alone... yes ineed there is a word that is used for a woman that would talk about her what panties she's wearing, what her preferred sexual position is , or wondering how large the size of a mans penis is.... ON THE FIRST communication barely knowing each others first names...... that word put simply is.. SLUT.
You DO realize this is a two-way street, right?
Although most people don't label the dudes anything for it...they're still cornballs for just shooting from the hip on first contact....so this one goes both ways... | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 4:33:13 PM |
Why do you put on make-up? Why do women wear clothes that work well with their body-type? I would say it's for the benefit of men most of the time. [Although, I have heard convincing arguments that this type of behavior is actual about female-female competition]
THAT's IT... I'm throwing away my makeup, my cloths, my bras and all my jewelry so I can walk around looking like a bag lady!!!
Ahhhhhhh sooooo much pressure to be a WOMAN!!
Actually, there's a growing number of guys who like their females to be completely natural...no makeup...no special "add-ons"....some guys don't like it, some do... | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 6:36:39 PM | | Nice guys finish last I am living proof if that. I have been looking high and low for a good woman and all I get is pushed away. Its knot fair. Ken | |
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| When do us good guys get the woman?
Posted: 3/7/2007 9:47:30 PM |
Nice guys finish last I am living proof if that. I have been looking high and low for a good woman and all I get is pushed away. Its knot fair. Ken
yeah but Ken... you don't have a car | |
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