| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 4:15:20 PM | | well, now that I have faithfully read thru all the posts and can relate to each and every one of them, I just wanted to add one thing. I've been parentless for 10 years. The first few years I spent holidays with friends. Today, I listen to friends w/family and how 'horrible' and 'stressful' and 'exhausting' things were for them. Doesn't sound like a fun time to me, I'd rather chill. Sometimes I get along better w/myself than anyone else! | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 4:31:49 PM | Well you can drink until you feel there isn't anymore pain, or you can enjoy Christmas as the season for givng, no, not by giving gifts, but giving of yourself.
Giving in the way the many posters here have given of themselves, to let someone know you are not alone, and that there are those who do care, more than you know.
Merry Christmas | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 4:35:59 PM | Hey OP some people feel like you every day not just Christmas...you just have to deal ...life isn't fair...nothing you can do to change it | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 4:40:20 PM | I have spent the last 10 yrs alone at Christmas. It sucks yes, and New Yrs to. Just have not found anyone since I divorced my cheating husband. This yr after being alone again last night, I put a ad out on craigslist for a date on New Yrs. A nice man responded. I have a date
on New Yrs!!!!!:}  | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 4:43:34 PM | Hey Dguy,
Yah I know, actually if you read my first post on this thread it was more to let people know that we are not in a small world of pain but many people are in the same boat, my original post that had huge emails and posts was Sad day today, down further here, and that was more about what was going on....after hearing so many people that were alone or lost loved ones I just felt that we need to rally around everyone and like you said it isnt limited to today or this holiday season but we need to make a difference in peoples lives, and fulfill needs if we can for someone that is within reach of us! So i agree as said in the first post this isnt a pity party this is reality and there are 1000's of people that hurt every day, so lets try to help heal that and turn a negative into a positive!
Mikey | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 4:49:06 PM | well thank god it's almost over!
maybe next year will find us all where we want to be, wishful thinking? it can't hurt right?
Kenny | |
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chusy
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Joined: 12/5/2006
Msg: 82 | |
| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 5:14:03 PM | This is my fifth Christmas without my husband. I loved him dearly, and i still miss him. But let me tell you, the first holiday i was able to realize that it did not evolve around the person who was missing was a gift to myself. Time does help, but sooner or later we can choose when to miss them, when to honor them, when to laugh at memories or when to cry. I felt guilty at first for not feeling how you do today, but i didn't die and there are moments that i think i am here to carry on his life, his memory and demonstrate what endurance can do to a person. Life and death makes us who we are...the down time you are experiencing is a vital part of it all. Feel every moment and let not a moment be wasted. They were worth it!
Peace! | |
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chusy
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Joined: 12/5/2006
Msg: 83 | |
| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 5:15:22 PM | And a little Bailey's Irish Cream never hurts either-i mean, Santa did leave it for me!  | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 5:16:38 PM | My only immediate family is my 81-year-old Mother, trapped in a nursing home more than 20 miles away. I certainly understand how you feel. Fortunately, she made it to Christmas dinner at my cousin's house today, the first time she has been in our county in exactly 4 months! I am thankful to God for that, but mindful of how it feels to be so isolated.
one thing that really helps is to find people in a similar boat and help them out--especially old people. It will do you a lot of good. Trust me. And look for new friends to make.
This day will be over in a few hours. Plan for next Christmas to be better. God bless you. | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 5:24:05 PM | | hi a10, sorry for your losses, the last one you describe would be enough to tip anyone over the edge especially at christmas time, losing a parent and/or a husband is bad enough but losing a child so young with theire whole life before them i cant begin to think how bad that would be, sorry once again | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 5:57:12 PM | I agree that it sucks. I was just in a three yr relationship . We broke up right before the holidays. I had to take my fifteen yr old to live with his dad in biloxi, and i am staying with my single mom. Not fun considering i am 34 now. LOL I feel like everyone out there is just trying to take advantage of me now. I feel really vulnerable. Somewhat like a piece of bait on a trotline. I dont want to stay at home all the time, but when i go out it doesnt make me feel any better . My heart goes out to u and try to keep yourself in high spirits. I know its hard. It is hard for me too . Jennifer  | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/25/2006 7:38:20 PM | omg...it doesnt suk...its what you make of it..come on people....seriously. i get the blues an despressed bout it too...new years is even harder for me...i hate this feeling gawd do i ever...but i will be dang if i sit at home an get all depressed bout it..not goin to let it get the best of me...so i make the best of it instead of feelin sorry for myself ...poor me syndrome...i'm all alone.... shesh ...its not true...its how you choose to spend the holiday.
spent 10 years in Thunderbay one winter...the place is not great
^^^ thunder bay is great...gotta get out there an have fun. theres skidoing...tobaganning... skiing...ice racing(cars)...hiking...tubing...ice fishing....an so much more to do. its a matter of getting out there to doin it. thunder bay has lots of events goin on...try joinin some. | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/26/2006 7:07:27 AM | Hey got to throw in my two cents..Man I was a bear yesterday I couldnt Fake it til I made it!!! went to daughters with BF he then tells me he has to get up at 10pm to go to work it was 3 in the afternoon!!!He said I didnt want to tell ya sooner so we were only there for about 3 hours and ,my daughters were like what the heck Ma.....
I just lost my MOM and I feel like the world is moving along just fine and Im stuck in the muck:
Lets just hope the New Year is brighter and that next year we can start early and plan something different for the holiday...I get stuck in the same ol,the cooking and cleaning up and pleasing everyone but myself...Its the known I reckon..anyhow Life Happens might as well learn from the lessons and just realize we arent alone Thanks for the Thread Mikey!!!!helped alot of people sounds like Happy New Year hun jewel | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/26/2006 2:59:24 PM | Hi All
I don't think it's the fact that Christmas Sucks, I think it's what we decide to do about it sucks.
Do any of you think back to when you were a child and looked so forward to Santa coming
I do, and you know what it was one of the happiest times of my child hood,
I used to lie in bed Christmas Eve. and so many times I would hear Santa tip toeing around the house.
Although I was raised in a family of 9 children and my parents didn't have much money, I always had faith that Santa was going to bring me one little gift, Guess what, Christmas morning I would be up before daylight and sure enough it would be under the tree so I knew I had to have been a good girl. Although it wasn't much, it meant the world to me.
I guess what was important to me was the fact that we were all together and we could feel the love around us.And moms cooking was always so mouth watering.
I have always continued this kind of Christmas for my own children, even though I was a single mother of 5 for two thirds of their growing up I did the best with what I had.
I to have lost loved ones as well as a daughter who left with a stranger she met on the internet 6 Christmas's ago, a daughter I havn't heard from since but I know she is healthy and happy, I miss her and love her Dearly, but have faith I will see her possibly next Christmas or a Christmas to follow. I have a lot of faith and know this is in God's hands and I have finally moved on to make the best of every day I have, for my self and all those around me.
I love life and each day is a new challenge and a learning experience.
I also want to say thank you to all my friends here that have helped to brighten my days and hopefully by next year I will have met that special man to share my Christmas and New Years wih. Hang in there it will get better but not with out your help,,, | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/26/2006 3:32:08 PM | Mikey, if I am reading you right you lost both your parents at the same time. I can only imagine what that feels like.
I lost my parents, thankfully while I was married with a family of my own. That really makes it easier to get through a death of your parents.
I lost my husband July 4th 2003, an investment banker was there:" let me handle things, get the money away from the insurnce company, they will not make any money for you". Well I did and the next thing I know, I am having to sell my house and get rid of things that really ment a lot to me. My children wanted money evey time I turned around and now I am in a duplex; wondering how is an older woman that has only taken care of family going to keep a roof over my head, for the rest of my life?
I have gone back to school for insurance, have my license, and I have to make it or ....well not. That is the two choices I have.
You are young seem to have a good living, a good home and the rest of your life to find someone to love and make a happy family with. GET OUT THERE AND DO JUST THAT!! YOUR PARENTS WOULD NOT WANT YOU TO BE ALONE; I SAY THIS FROM A PARENTS POINT OF FEW.
My children have almost broke me and I still want them with me, when they will come, and most of all I want them to be happy. I am sure that is what your's would want also. | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/26/2006 6:05:01 PM | Welp, Christmas finally came and went, and with the help of some chilled spirits, it slid by with very little notice. Let's just say it sucked a bit less than usual.
Being single this time of the year is what I think sucks worse than anything else.
No matter. The Ex called on Christmas Eve and invited me over for a drink, a hug and a movie. Sad truth: I haven't met anyone here or on any other 'dating site' that has 1/10th as much intelligence, nearly as much compassion or capacity for caring as this women. I'm glad we could remain good friends. When you come right down to the brass tacks, good friends are the only thing in this life that matters. The rest are all just silly, lookie-loo females on some dating site.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone. I tip my hat to those here who are actually serious about finding a mate on POF. The rest are mere entertainment. | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/27/2006 11:14:46 AM | | good MISSING.. glad you werent alone on xmas...shows someone cares still. i have lingured in this site for to many years to finding out it is just entertainment for most or attention seeker....i agree. i tried to reach out to some at xmas ..to have friends to only be shot down....goes to show you. i also made it thru xmas as well as i can. | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/27/2006 12:50:36 PM | Kenny Aldrich: maybe next year will find us all where we want to be, wishful thinking?
That's where this has gone for me. I'm already setting goals to meet for 2007 that will really make a difference for me. None of them involve meeting a great gal though; the harder you try it seems, the more elusive it becomes. Ever chase a rabbit?
One thing I can take from this thread: I think that the worst part about Christmas is looking back and realizing that I didn't accomplish much because no plans or goals were made, let alone kept.
Thanks for the catalyst that got me to thinking about this, Kenny. Happy New Year!
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/27/2006 1:01:26 PM | Wow i wish i had looked at this when i was sitting alone on xmas day while my fwb was with his family, i too was offered an invite but hey i barely know half of them and was in no mood to meet the others. But i have to give him credit he got in and out of the family situation as fast as he could to be with me and that is wonderful in itself. I wish every last one of you the best in 2007 and lets hope that none of us are here on NY eve. Lots of love to all
Starr | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/27/2006 6:12:51 PM | hey Mikey
you and me both son, hell i spent x-mas all on my own, i got new year to spend on my own too, i turned down offers to stay places cause i cant afford to go and ive been really sick due to my illness and i got to go to hospital in a few days time and im being made homeless real soon etc etc
but you know what?
laugh in the face of adversity dude thats what i do
cause i truely believe that when something really bad is happening in your life
it usually means something good is about too happen and its just around the next corner
take care bro hang cool.... | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/27/2006 6:22:53 PM | Hey Cowboy, and everyone else that posted,
Well I never thought that my little thread would spark so much interest, but i think that what we all learned from this is that we are not alone, even when we think we are...also that we need to be there for people in need and if we can fulfill a need for someone than we need to!
Also I have learned that Christmas is very lonely for a lot of people and a lot of hurt from losing loved ones and friends, and that i need to look harder for those people and make sure that they know they are loved and be there for them!
I hope that this new year will be awesome for all of you and that you know that there are a whole whack of people out there willing to listen or talk to you, and if you cant see that just looking at this thread or the one i did Sad day today on Christmas morning, then you need to go back and just look at everyone that posted something! You all are great and I hope that one day I can be there for you as well!
Mikey | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/27/2006 7:37:01 PM | | maestro if i may ask you....i offered to be a friend in the time of ur needs at xmas ....why the refusal? just curious? i was willing to listen or to talk.. your willing to be there for everyone else...what bout you ? | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/29/2006 7:02:39 AM | hmm 2 days an no response...i thank you...
happy new years everyone! | |
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| Christmas Sucks!
Posted: 12/29/2006 12:00:15 PM | ok i am lost, i dont know when you tried to contact me kookies, but i apologize if somehow i hurt you, i have never and refused a conversation ever, sometimes i leave my window open and not here, and sometimes my roommate is on the computer, but if i am here i will never refuse a talk! And sometimes if i am working and cant talk i will send a message after the fact letting people know that i am not avoiding them....there is noone on this site that i am avoiding, there are some rude people on this site that i block but unless you are blocked my door is open when i am here.....im sorry you think that kookies and hope we can chat and make you happy again!
Mike | |
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