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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 9:09:41 AM | Like others have said,,and it is a cliche', but age is just a number. It's what you do with those numbers that have passed that matter. Live, make mistakes, learn, carry on and hope you don't make the same mistakes. I'd love to keep the difference at 5 years either way, but finding that a 45 year old male is in the "black hole" zone in this dating thingy. The females my age have figured out that men my age are not the easiest to shape and mold, so they carry on to find something more to their liking. Again, like others have said, fitness does play a part even thou I smoke and "DO" drugs , I dare ya to keep up | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 9:20:25 AM | My last boyfriend was eight years younger. My daughter's father was nine.
Most of the men I've been dating since my last bf and I split are about 15 years younger--give or take.
I'm self-sufficient and don't need a man for anything but companionship. Maybe I'm just immature and get along with younger men better. *shrug* | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 9:31:07 AM | but finding that a 45 year old male is in the "black hole" zone in this dating thingy.
Walts, I find your comment interesting and I disagree [politely]. I love being my age because I know what I want and if someone is only interested in moulding me then they likely aren't mature enough to accept the traits I have cultivated and refined over the years. I enjoy being independent and self-sufficient. Yes being set in our ways can hinder relationships or the development of them but we have to be accepted for the entire package. It's not that we are too old to change, I believe we have acquired life skills and experiences that make us more inclined to be looking for compatability, maturity and communication on broader levels. And I'm not suggesting clones of ourselves. It is our uniqueness that makes us interesting.
People that are forty-five plus are like a fine wine; we are not getting older, we are getting better. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 9:41:07 AM | Fiery,,,, I did say 45 year old MALE. I have known for YEARS that you don't even try to mess with a woman's "being", habits or traits. I don't have a death wish. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 10:09:40 AM | I have always been attracted to men my own age, but have been chased by way younger and way older men. I just like guys my own age...36...this one is a deal breaker for me. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 10:41:39 AM | Fiery,,,, I did say 45 year old MALE. I have known for YEARS that you don't even try to mess with a woman's "being", habits or traits. I don't have a death wish.
I should have been more specific Walts ... my comment was directed at both males AND females. I think we definitely have an advantage at that age. I certainly appreciate that fact in most men around my age and thus the following statement:
Yes being set in our ways can hinder relationships or the development of them but we have to be accepted for the entire package.
It is all about self-acceptance and that is needed before we can accept differences in others, including age.
I always send polite responses to the younger gents you write me saying I am flattered, I have yet to have a 30 year-old provide sufficient reason to pique my interest. I am not saying however that I wouldn't date someone considerably younger. Only that someone that age has not made enough of an impression on me to pursue it; and most have lacked substance.
I agree Wyldekatt - there has to be some substance to the person. Laughter is always good but there has to be a good balance | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 10:51:37 AM | Fish Fancy...you too?????????? (chased by way younger/older guys) LOL
I prefer guys around my age... However, I'm finding lately, that some of them are just too immature in their thinking regarding relationships <--this not directed at anyone in particular! it's just an observation *smile*
Age really is just a number...its all in how you present yourself. I'd like a balance of maturity and sillyness. Someone to be a 'grown up' with but also someone to laugh with so hard you're afraid your drink will shoot out your nose!!! | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 11:12:37 AM | | I've dated both older and younger men - younger men seem to have an affinity to me, works for me - no complaints. I don't really care about the age, it's the personality and how we as a couple get along - if it's right it's right - age plays no factor for me. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 11:24:11 AM | age is just a number there is some younger men who are mature for their age and some older men who are immature for their age but if we are on same page what the hell we are here for a good time not along time !!!!  | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 11:35:59 AM | I should have been more specific Walts ... my comment was directed at both males AND females
Sorry on my part Fiery. I guess what I should have said is that you probably can't disagree about my comment on the 45 year old MALE,,,,cause well those are my observations as a male. I agree at our age we do have an advantage,,,,,just not a dating one. I know personally, where I have came from and how I have become the person that I am at this point in my life. And I have no problem being that person. So my acceptance(of myself) at this age is not the problem,,,it is a problem thou for some of the same age, but the opposite gender.Not a big deal in the big picture, but a major problem when trying to date. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 2:15:58 PM | | When I was in my 20's I had no prob dating someone 10 years older then me.. Now that I am older (in my 30's) I tend to stay closer to my age. However if I met someone who was older and quite the fun guy I would not let age stop me.. Some poeple are very young hearted and free spirited so their age does not define them. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 2:41:47 PM | In the last 10 years I've typically dated women fairly close to my age, always younger, just how it seems to work out. Well now that I am on the verge of 30, I've noticed more and more that older women have been persuing me. It's not that I don't like older women, but I haven't found one that can keep up with my spontaneity. Plus I do look like I'm still in my early to mid 20's. I'll be thankful for that when I'm heading through my 40's
My Father, who's on his way through his 50's lives with a woman who is closer to my age than his own, so that too kind of deters me from going much older than myself (not really into shagging my step mom, know what I'm saying? lol)
But I will agree, age is just a number, maturity and life expierience are paramount above all else. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 2:44:55 PM | mostly dated men older than me. As of late it's been younger ones who've putting themselves forward and out there. MMMMmmmm, i'm not a cougar and keep telling them that.
It doesn't matter to me either way.
Most of the guys i dated were close to my own age.
it's all relative in the grand scheme of life and as long as there is a spark, some stimulating conversation and other things, does it really matter?
My mental age is 10 years old btw!   | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 8:12:52 PM | I would feel comfortable with those no more than ten years younger and five years older.
My best friend is living with a fellow that is twenty years younger than she is and while they generally get along well, there are those pesky little things that bother her (his pals wanting to go out and partay all night long etc.).
For the most part, they are grand together.
I believe one completed decade younger is enough of a gap. Heck, I remember the end of the Vietnam war!
Just me being me.
^^BG^^ | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 9:35:14 PM | Mudd,
What's so wrong with being idealist? Do you even really understand what it means? I think that idealists, such as myself, have more a lot more soul than others (which I don't mean in the literal sense, if you believe they exist). To have that sort of a perspective and vision about how something could or should be. Sure we may not always have the initiative to make it happen but we are the brains and passion behind it all. If the world didn't have visionaries and idealists in this world we would be stuck sitting around, picking bugs out of each others hair. Well... maybe not THAT extreme, but you see what I'm saying. The world will never get anywhere if we all we do is enjoy the 'simple things' in life. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 11:44:05 PM | | I'll go ten years more or less,but even that's not set in stone. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 11:48:39 PM | The only age difference I see is the difference
between the age on my birth certificate and the age I feel/act.... | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/30/2006 11:59:57 PM | You know, it's quite an interesting question, ...
I've known people in their mid-twenties that were more 'mature' than peeps in their 40's and 50's... but boy did those peeps know how to have fun! | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 12/31/2006 6:27:20 PM | I think it only matters if you are conscious of how old the other person is or appears to be and for some reason it bothers you. Let me expand on that a little.....I think if you look past this new online dating craze for a moment and suppose you meet someone through work, friends, parties, whatever, then the first thing that comes to mind is NOT if they're the exact same age as you or older or younger, its whether there is an attraction there, mentally and physically and some shared values or interests perhaps. A lot of people on here seem to have pre-conceived notions that "I'd only date someone 3 years younger or older than me" or "I only date men/women younger than myself". Thats just so short-sighted, restrictive and shows a degress of shallowness (im my opinion).
Sure, we may put in an age range if asked in the POF search box, but thats simply in the hope of finding more common interests with someone vaguely of a similar age. If that is the overridingly most important criteria, then its a pretty sad statement of the world we live in........ | |
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joshfr
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Joined: 11/27/2005
Msg: 47 | |
| Age difference....
Posted: 12/31/2006 8:40:19 PM | | I am not at all concerned with ages, it's only a number. It is the person that matters, not their age. Personally, I find that as life experience is concerned, older women can understand me better than most others. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 1/2/2007 8:50:28 AM | | I had a 5 year relationship with a woman and old friend who was 30 years almost to the day younger. Over the years we had been friends we fell in love. It was an educational experience but it didnt take very long for the differences in maturity to show. The funny part which suprised me was her being very jealous of women my age. I would have imagined it might be the opposite but for some reason it was women younger than her that she felt threatened by. I think for me the optimum age would be a woman 3-5 years younger. It seems for the most part to be a good match. | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 1/2/2007 9:02:51 AM | | I think Scotland forever hit one of the problems with the internet dating thingy. It's pretty tough(or next to impossible) to paint the actual true picture of yourself here. I know a few people in and around my age who can put the youngsters of 20 something to shame in the physical activity category for an example. And then you can have a young one with more maturity than some 50 years old I have met. I guess it goes both ways for all, and it is all about the "fit". | |
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| Age difference....
Posted: 1/2/2007 10:10:21 AM | ^^^ I have to agree, its all about the "fit", if you can carryon a conversation, if you have the same interests, etc... I don't rule out anyone, until I have met them and seen if it would work or not. I have met young people that I have lots in common with and older that I have absolutely nothing in common with....   Friends come in all ages as far as I am concerned, and anything more... well I guess time will tell...still  | |
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