| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/4/2007 10:41:20 PM | | I think that some times we meet our soul mate and for some reason don't hook up with that person. Then you look back years later and think... wow that person was the person I was supposed to be with but you aren't. You stepped away for whatever reason, and then you spend the rest of your life looking for that person, but you walked away from them for whatever reason. So you are alone and still looking and not finding them. And it makes life really sad! | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 2:09:11 AM | you know what, that was the exact reason why i hung on to that relationship for longer than i should have...i was thinking, he could be "the one" and i didn't want to miss out on such a great guy but we ended up goin our separate ways at the end and of course it broke my heart...sad thing is...i might not be strong enough and give him another chance...anyway, you never know...so going back to what i said before...don't think of anyone as being your soul mate until you've married them and stay married for the next 30yrs or so....then you shouldn't feel like you probably missed out...does it make sense? or am i crazy for saying that? | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 2:35:34 AM | maybe if some people wouldnt say I wanna ride on the back of a harley they would find someone with a soul..Facts are facts .most owners of harleys are corupt on both sides of fence.. and i`ll bet maybe less than 20% own one from a ligit purchase.. point is...maybe your looking in the wrong places..Find someone with a truck..least you`ll know they work..haha here we go | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 5:49:44 AM | OP: I have family in Manteca, I've been there before...My advice: look elsewhere...No offense to my dad's hometown, but looking at the quality of person you are, you deserve better...I'm not saying move, but at least look around in places like Sacramento or the SF Bay Area. My father did meet my mother here in San Jose, and since then, things have been hunky-dory for nigh 20 years! Basically, I think you need to see the rest of the state. You really are in one of the less likely towns in CA to produce a quality guy, my father notwithstanding!
I'm not from Manteca but I'm curious....You've know everybody in Manteca well enough that you can judge their character?
I'm sure that it has its share of good and not so good people. Just like San Jose does or L.A does, or anywhere else. The only difference is that the latter has more of both cause theres obviously more people living there
3/4 of the people living there are from the bay area or at least work there. What does that say about Manteca or the Bay Area.....LOL
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 6:19:27 AM |
Most of the single people I know want to be married.
..and most of the married people at times want to be single.
We all think the grass is greener... | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 1:07:30 PM |
holy crap... that's too much to read...
I tried to read. Ok, I didn't try very hard.  Even if one manages to deal with the length and lack of white space, I don't think there's much of anything that'd help anyone. Lots of words; not much meaning.
can you do the reader's digest version next time?
Here you go:
"metaphor of friendship can be grounded in the clay nature of the human body" | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 2:36:21 PM | It has become harder for us to find our soul mate, because there are more people to choose from. Back in the day we didn't have the travel and moving options that we have now. We have larger social circles. With more choices available to us, unfortunately people tend to play more games with our heads and hearts.
I believe a true soul mate isn't just found & you connect for life. While a potential soul mate may be found. It's how you connect and work together. If you truly want a soul mate you need to work on your relationship every day. You don't get a beautiful garden just by throwing some seeds on the dirt. Like love it needs to be worked and cared for. | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 4:35:55 PM | When you think you have found your soul mate reality sets in and usually one party likes the other party better and the relationship is short lived. I guess its best to meet someone doing the things we like to do........or if your broke and cant do those things you like to do you have to settle for a cheapskate and walk around on the ground for free...............lol | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 6:33:49 PM | Well danz45... obviously you read my profile and didn't like it... which is your opinion.
maybe if some people wouldnt say I wanna ride on the back of a harley they would find someone with a soul..Facts are facts .most owners of harleys are corupt on both sides of fence.. and i`ll bet maybe less than 20% own one from a ligit purchase.. point is...maybe your looking in the wrong places..Find someone with a truck..least you`ll know they work..haha here we go
But I think you should have posted in the forum entitled "Why do some people feel it's ok to blast you..."
This is the forum where we discussed the person that blasted me for my profile or better yet just email me directly with your complaints and then I can file them under the unread delete button.
most owners of harleys are corupt on both sides of fence.. and i`ll bet maybe less than 20% own one from a ligit purchase.
I'd like to know where you got your statistics as well.
FYI not every one who rides a Harley is corrupt... my older brother has one and has been married the same woman for 24 years and has worked as a supervisor for the same company for 26 years, doesn't smoke or do drugs. And yes he paid for his legitimately. | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 11:20:46 PM | Once in a moon that is blue, I browse these threads. Well I happened upon this one tonight. I must say Janet quipped right the first time and then cracked me up the 2nd time with her Readers Digest comment.
Truly friends, I think we all need to "love" ourselves a little bit first. Know who we are, on our own feet. Many times this soul mating (or sole mating  ) business is about finding a crutch to lean on. I am not saying let's forget dating or let's not look for love. Heavn knows humans are social beings, and we all need love (as the Beatles say). It's just that we live in a society dominated by prepared standards not of our choice(s). The man has to be taller than the woman. She has to be 36-24-36 (or something to the "measure"), he has to be the incredible hulk, in places seen and unseen (except by the sole mate), and from Burt Ray-n-olds to Nicole Kid Man, we are signing on without any question. Then we all go home and cry .... as if each of us is lacking.
I don't know friends, let's each decide who we are first, what we are about, then that soul may follow the body. When we build us, they will come (i.e follow)
Peace y'all  (me and my soulmate) | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 11:32:52 PM |
Janet quipped right the first time and then cracked me up the 2nd time with her Readers Digest comment
Janet is one of an elite few that make me worry about waking up the neighbors with my laughter. Pretty, smart, and a killer wit--I just can't figure out why she's not taken ;)
I think we all need to "love" ourselves a little bit first.
Won't I go blind?
The man has to be taller than the woman.
I got royally flame for say I think that's silly a few days ago. But I still think it's silly to throw someone away without giving them a chance just for their altitude of their head.
She has to be 36-24-36
Hell, no. I'll leave those for the jocks. (Oh, ok. I won't rule someone out for it. Don't want to be a hypocrite after my altitude comments.)
we all go home and cry
I spent way too much time doing that in the past. It wasn't very productive.
he has to be the incredible hulk
Oh used-food, that's the problem! I never knew I needed to be green!
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/5/2007 11:41:29 PM | I dont think we look for our soul mates I think we look for lovers expecting them to be soul mates. A soul mate is someone you connect with on an unusualy vulnerable level. It doesnt have to be Mr. Perfect or Miss. Right. There are other relationships that can connect on that level.
-Gina | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/6/2007 8:18:50 AM | Soul Mate .... Sole Mate ... Sole Mat .... ah-hah!!!
def: "Someone who will selflessly lay at our feet without expecting anything in return. And remain attractive and cheerful regardless of our constant stepping upon them"
What people think of as ideal is really nothing but a doormat.
I disagree that we need to "love ourselves more". There is WAY TOO MUCH selfishness.
Better to love others... with respect, challenge, and a desire to learn from each other -- risk f-ing up -- give kisses and hugs as well as forgiveness.
Do you read those profiles?
I WANT, I WANT, I WANT, I WANT -- I DON'T WANT, I DON'T WANT, I DON'T WANT...
But who are THEY?
Perhaps they don't know.
And maybe, just maybe, this is more of a problem than not having a date for Saturday Night. | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/6/2007 11:48:04 AM | ^^^^^
Well said! I totally agree, and thank you for laying out what I think needs to be mentioned!
I always think of the world as more than just myself... In fact, the reason many people have self-esteem issues is simply a matter of caring for others more than they care for themselves...
That's how I live, anyway.
I also agree that is someone wants a good mate, they should focus on attracting the right man, not on repelling every potentially-wrong one.
Right on!
~ David | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/6/2007 11:48:30 AM |
Sole Mate
Sole mate. I was wondering how long it'd take the shoe to drop
Do you read those profiles?
Too many of them. Must be why my head hurts. 
But who are THEY?
I haven't seen a profile yet that gave me any idea who someone is. (Ok, there was one but the who wasn't something pleasent.)
There is WAY TOO MUCH selfishness.
Yeah. Or at least way too much of not even trying to see the other person's point of view. | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/6/2007 12:11:03 PM |
I haven't seen a profile yet that gave me any idea who someone is.
I've seen yours and I think you've succeeded. The combination of photos and the written word tell a great deal.
And being lucky enough to find someone on a forum... how they respond... says so much. (you are now on my favorites list)
as far as
way too much of not even trying to see the other person's point of view
Not sure what that means...
I can see a person's point of view and not agree.
What determines "not trying to see"? | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/6/2007 1:35:37 PM |
What determines "not trying to see"?
Ok, I didn't say that very well. It's not about agree or disagreeing with someone. Just having some understanding of why they feel the way they do. You still might not like their opinion but seeing the reasoning (or un-reasoning) behind it can allow one to get along better.
I'm still not say this very well and it's reminding me why I've never been a good writer.  | |
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Kee2
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Joined: 10/7/2006
Msg: 44 | |
| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/6/2007 3:29:58 PM | I think the reason why most of us find it so hard to find our soul mate is because we are too caught up in money and material things. I'll make someone very happy one day, but whether she be wife or girlfriend, it won't be because she financially supports me or vice versa. It will be because something about her moves me emotionally and I think she's a beautiful person. If she loves me, it will show in the way she treats me and what she does. Everything else is nonsense.
Once again...dayum Gina!
hmmmmmmmm...Janet...hmmmmmmm | |
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Kee2
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Joined: 10/7/2006
Msg: 45 | |
| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/6/2007 3:34:30 PM | Danz45, I know that was said for argument purposes and you probably own a Harley yourself, but if I could have the "Conferderate Wild Cat", I'd own a Harley too. ...and trust. I am no criminal. | |
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Kee2
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Joined: 10/7/2006
Msg: 46 | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/6/2007 6:02:33 PM | [/I disagree that we need to "love ourselves more". There is WAY TOO MUCH selfishness.]
Well, I apologize for not explaining myself correctly. I come from a different culture, and the characteristic that stands out most among people of the US is their adherance to individualism and pursuit of self, to the detriment of others and/or other values. It bewilders us "others". And, in general (not always) but in general, people in this culture do not "see" it. I should admit to you all, it sickens us as people who come from other cultures.
Coupled with that is a general sense of "not worthy enough" among many individuals. This is not the place (maybe) to go into a long discussion of this; otherwise the author of this thread will be upset.
And so, my point was that rather than think of ourselves as not "complete", "not good enough" or "lacking" in any way, it behooves us to learn how to be happy with who we are, to like ourselves, or love ourselves, a bit more. Of course, this does not mean that we be blind to our shortcomings or that we should refrain from improving/developing ourselves ...... You get the idea.
Sole was meant as "only, lone, solitary", bla bla bla, (to those with sole-less shoes)
B | |
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| Why is it so hard to find our soul mate?
Posted: 1/6/2007 6:11:41 PM | As eeek put it, "Sometimes a "soul mate" just doesn't keep being one forever."
I basically agree with that. The odds of finding a 'soul mate' ready made right out of the box are EXTREMLY rare. You are much better off if you find a close match and then 'work' on a relationship. Over time it could become a match that allows you to touch souls, so to speak.
The biggest obstacle is that too many people expect such a relationship to endure without any work. That is the Achilles heel of a 'soul mate'. It takes two people constantly working together using communication, understanding, and above all compromise of BOTH individuals in order to maintain such a bond. But people do change and they can diverge from each other if they are not careful.
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