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Show ALL Forums  > Washington  > Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted      Home login  
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 Jetmech
Joined: 2/1/2006
Msg: 26
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Cold Responce vs. Read/DeletedPage 2 of 15    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15)
I've seen both in my own case and I've had a full 'In' box too... but lets just face it.
No reply is just their way of saying, "I'm too lazy to bother because I find your message/profile/pictures not worthy of my interest".

I have gotten "unopened and deleted" messages but when I check the "who viewed me" there they are looking at the pictures.
So By seeing that I know they were not the right person for me anyway. If they were that cheezy here on this site, how bad are they in real life? I sure don't have the desire to find out.
I always resond even if its not the answer they are looking for **chuckle** I have even gotten back seething answers to my 'no thank you' and I posted one on my profile that says it all.
 FoxyTash
Joined: 4/16/2006
Msg: 27
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 3/24/2007 3:29:37 PM
I've also gotten unread deleted or read deleted. But sometimes I would get some people saying that they're not interested or just the distance is kinda far and I really respect those people who actually do reply and say that they're not interested. Rather than just read and deleted right away. :|
 stenomage
Joined: 3/20/2006
Msg: 28
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Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 3/24/2007 8:13:36 PM
JetMech --

I just *had* to read your profile to see what the "says it all" e-mail said, and I gotta say, wow --! I guess that's the whole bit about anonymity on the internet fueling that particular e-mail.

I play chess online every so often (okay, so maybe *too* often). I've always perceived chess as a game of royalty, which kind of suggests good manners ... so imagine my surprise when I beat this guy, and he proceeds to swear at me!

So much for manners ... so it's not just here. Strange, though, to see that kind of language coming from someone of the female persuasion!
Scary ...

--gdw
 Jetmech
Joined: 2/1/2006
Msg: 29
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Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 3/27/2007 10:48:10 AM
Oh here the proof, I read this on a profile two days ago and its the answer to all the questions.

She wrote:
I've also decided to be completely truthful. If you are ugly, don't e-mail me !! You don't stand a chance!! Chemistry contains mutal attraction. I'm tired of those ugly guys e-mailing me. I think " WHAT? Do you think I'm ugly or something." So please no ugly guys or older gents...I want to stay young...I don't want my daddy.
.........................................................................................................................
This gal was 46 years old. Itjust goes to show us Bridge Trolls what to expect.
 stenomage
Joined: 3/20/2006
Msg: 30
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Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 3/27/2007 1:43:29 PM
Heh ... I wonder if anyone has her on their Favorites list ... and if so, will she be removed after they read that! Should be interesting to track ...

--gdw
 ImJustMeKevin
Joined: 2/20/2007
Msg: 31
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Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 3/28/2007 7:03:00 AM
Unread Deleted, whoa never had that one before. What a waste of my time LOL.

Kevin
 HotCoffeeGirl
Joined: 2/23/2007
Msg: 32
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Polite Turn-Downs
Posted: 3/28/2007 6:52:42 PM
OK, so I read with interest the "Cold Response" thread. What I want to know is suggestions for Polite Turn Downs.

1) For Flat Turn Downs.... as in you don't have any interest at all for whatever reason.
2) For Turn Downs when you've corresponded back and forth a bit and realize it won't work.
3) For Persistant Types just BEFORE you might ban them from contacting you.
 guynamejeff
Joined: 7/14/2006
Msg: 33
Polite Turn-Downs
Posted: 3/29/2007 8:34:40 AM
^^^
1.) Thanks for the nice email. blah blah blah. Good luck with your search.

2.) Tell him about a man you are really excited to get to know.

3.) You don't even want to talk to him anymore? I'm not sure there is a polite way to say that. But if you do say it, and he is also impolite, then you'll probably have to block him eventually.
 bevans
Joined: 1/21/2007
Msg: 34
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 3/29/2007 10:51:07 PM
I gues it's kind of a how you were raised deal. I was taught if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all.
 johnny807
Joined: 3/19/2007
Msg: 35
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 4/10/2007 3:05:55 PM
I'm not trying to sound rude or anything, but not getting a response is nothing to get to upset about. It's called taking a hint. I try to respond back to everyone who sends me a message even though I don't get the same in return all the time. But if they decide not to respond to me I just figure they are not interested and move on. If they're not polite enough to respond, do you really want to be with a person like that anyway.
 ninetonine
Joined: 1/21/2007
Msg: 36
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 4/29/2007 1:43:59 PM
Maybe its just a question of changing how the web service here displays content. If a person say, doesn't smoke, they should have an option as to not even be surfable by people who do. They should probibly have a lot of settings like that. A person would have more selectivity that way.

Mine would be Prefer Not To Says in the relationship status,with 5 plus favorites to be sure. After all, sluts may be fun, but six men possibly at one time isn't. Especially when you might have to keep adjusting the camera for height. ;)

But I do agree that an internet sevice is like putting a message in a bottle.

Even if a conversation is running off and on with someone interesting, it really doesn't infer anything concrete. Mostly I find its just romantic nonsense, especially when the excuses start poping up, as to why they "can't" meet. Or the fact that if they were that interested a meet would be a forethcoming suggestion and soon, one that I wouldn't have to press.

As a persons interest will make opportunities, not excuses.

Priorites plain and simple. If a person is interested they will meet and soon, if anything to satisfy their curiosity. Including a negotiated, where and when. If nothing concrete is offered, either to that end or after the meet, move on. Stop dancing around with a maybe on the internet, find a friend and lover who only wants to dance with you, where: ever, when: ever, and for as long as you [u]both[/u], followed by fifty more underlines, want to be together. Truely.

Good luck -OP, I understand your frustrations, indeed. But its really a quality of person issue not sending quantities of messages to uninterested or "overly busy" types. Be selective yourself.

I am, and single because of this, but I wouldnt have it anyother way. Its very much a U2- Still Havent Found What Im Looking For , concept in toto. It not, in my case of being hard to get, its just the opposite sex hasn't really bothered, despite their various advertisements of "looking for a good man" and or other what not, truely thats their loss. Lipservice of the truely bored to be sure, and "Desperate Housewives" finaly trying to circumvent their poor decision in a lover, to be sure.

Lasitude of the emotionaly indecisivie, being the problem of that, I'm sure. ;)

Anyways -Op, just some concepts that may help.

But to answer the question of the thread, both tell me to move on.

 ninetonine
Joined: 1/21/2007
Msg: 37
Polite Turn-Downs
Posted: 4/29/2007 2:02:09 PM
HotCoffeGirl,

1) Ask them why are they on a dating site? If they have a reason to personally reject you, find out the reason from that person.

2) The silence of the lack of communication, in and of its self speaks volumes. If they still don't get it refer to 1).

3) Don't be polite, thats what got them encouraged to be persistant, and most likely the woman involved considered a byatch "who leads men on". Refer to 1)

3a) If you wanted more salt to pour on a mans pride, with such a question, I'm sure you have your own 5 lb bag. Which may answer 1). ;)

 rosabugg
Joined: 3/31/2007
Msg: 38
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 5/8/2007 12:35:25 AM
I have tried to answer all the ppl who wrote me, if I havent.. I am so sorry! I am deleting my ad for a few reasons. I met "nice guys" only to be suddenly dumped with no explanation! talk about friggin rude!
I have had a cpl guys say- nope not interested. To them.. thank you! To the read.. deleted, and no response.. just think about that when u are trying to get a date!
To the ad to favorites, and suddenly its gone... what the hell? At least I told the guys I was leaving and not going to be on here anymore. For more than one reason...
I have met some nice guys on here.. or so I thought. Whats withe te not calling back or texting back or whatever, after all the hunnies, babys and sweeties?
I am giving up... cold response or read deleted... I gave out my roses.. where the flip are mine?
Good luck to all. I know I am hoping for it this time around.
Cynical in Auburn!
 elpolarbear
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 39
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 5/8/2007 2:05:47 AM
Hi Rosa

My name is Mike and I've had NO responses to my sent emails.That's cool,but I wonder if I'm desperate or the profile is too odd.lol I'm sorry that guys disappointed you and that it's hard to meet someone.Actually,the forums seem a better way to have folks respond to me.Maybe I should be satisfied with someone answering my posts.:)
 darkromeo415
Joined: 12/10/2004
Msg: 40
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 5/8/2007 10:10:37 AM
Well, here's what I do. When someone doesn't reply to me I send a nice little message that says:

"Ya know, ignoring someone like a snobby bytch is NOT attractive"

~Cheers~
 darkromeo415
Joined: 12/10/2004
Msg: 41
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 5/8/2007 10:47:16 AM
The fact that this Topic has 760 views and only 41 replies should tell you a lot about people on this website, and in Washington in particular!!!
 rosabugg
Joined: 3/31/2007
Msg: 42
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 5/8/2007 8:31:15 PM
I hear that! Whats up with Washngton anyway? I have been here over 20 yrs and still to this day people are rude and snobby! they talk about east coasters having an attitude! sheesh! I dont think so! Arent you the one Romeo who came fom east? well welcome to lovely washington state! lol
to bear.. hey You seem like a nice guy. I know we all say nice guy.. nice girl... looks like we are getting more action from this topic!
what to do? I am baffled! well hey, maybe we can all hook up! lol
Rosie
 guynamejeff
Joined: 7/14/2006
Msg: 43
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 5/8/2007 8:47:18 PM
Guys, let's keep this in perspective. Some women are getting TONS of emails. I was talking to a girl that was getting around 50 per day. Now honestly, should she really be expected to spend the time to look at all their profiles and send something nice back?

Also, it sounds like when people do email back with a polite "nothankyou" they often get a rude or obscene reply. I know it's hard to believe, right romeo? But people DO send mean emails. So either way, they get flamed.

Most importantly, we will not change the way other people approach this website. We can either accept it for what it is and find a way to enjoy it, or move along to something we do enjoy. But seriously, complaining about EVERYONE in Washington state is not going to help our dating prospects.

Better yet, host an event north of Seattle and let's all get social!
 elpolarbear
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 44
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 5/9/2007 12:58:51 PM
Thanks Rosa.

Of course,it'd be daft to assume everyone is attracted to everyone.I think nice girls don't want guys who are 420 friendly on the weekends or non-conformists.Heck,I can't email another lady who wants to plan a meet&greet in Tacoma.lol We all make our own choices in life,but it's nice to have folks at least acknowledge that you wrote them.We should get folks together..incidentally,my idea was getting folks together Sunday at 3pm@ Harmon Brewing.This is 21st&Pacific Av..downtown Tacoma.I kind of agree with romeo..lots of ladies are guarded about first time meeetings...as are men.I think(unless there's something that offends the other party)that any contact should at least be answered.IMHO
Mike
 SeattleArtist
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 45
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 5/27/2007 8:49:56 PM
Greetings!

Well if you dont hear from them on the first E-mail then its their loss, dont get offended! The chances are they get several E-mails, more than they know what to do with and cant get to every single one of them.

But after the second E-mail you get no repsonse than a follow E-mail is in order and after that you get nothing, you can do nothing or tell them off. I tell them off when I get a cold shoulder after a E-mail exchange, they deserve it. GOOD LUCK!
 Tantalized
Joined: 1/8/2006
Msg: 46
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 6/16/2007 11:32:45 AM
Dohhh how can you ask this question…
I am a hypocrite now darn it.
I prefer a response over nothing
I also realize that someone may not be being cold
They may just be short on time or something
But I can honestly say that I delete without response
I do read their profile, first
Having said that I am sure I will continue with my hypocrisy on this issue

 Sea_Town
Joined: 6/21/2007
Msg: 47
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 6/26/2007 10:41:54 AM
I'm really suprised by the responses here, I never write back to someone I'm not interested in, that is my no thanks! lol unless I have had dialog with them and then they finally send a picture and there is no physical attraction.
Lots of men have not replied to my emails and I never think how rude! to me that is their "no ty" I get enough email, why would I want to have to read "no ty's" over and over? are you all lonely for conversation or maybe trying to find friends ?

Well you gave me something to think about.
 crabstuffing
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 48
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 6/26/2007 10:51:30 AM
This is good, usually I do the read/delete if I'm not interested.
It's always people who obviously do NOT read my profile and are the total opposite of me.
So lately I've replied back with "read my profile again".
Then they get mad! oooo!!! haha! One guy even blocked me!


Not worth it.
 Jetmech
Joined: 2/1/2006
Msg: 49
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Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 6/26/2007 1:42:13 PM
20 pages behind.......well it looks like I won't be talking to her as well as many other guys now.

What we need is like other sites...once we don't get responses we are able to remove their profile from any further search. Nothing like writing the same person twice once they modify their profile and pictures and you think you are talking to some one new.
I've gotten to the point I have to write down the names and reading it prior to trying to formulate a whole new e-mail of introduction. The sad part is the list is getting several pages deep.
 kenlookin
Joined: 2/26/2005
Msg: 50
Cold Responce vs. Read/Deleted
Posted: 7/2/2007 4:37:23 PM
Personally, I do side with sending the person some sort of response, and I for one, always do. I reply to many of these simply to be polite even when uninterested. Listen, the person took some time in writing and sending YOU the message, the very least a person can do is write THEM back, in the grand scheme of life, it's not a big deal and only fair.

As for those who are guilty of 'read/deleted' or 'unread/deleted', they are just plain rude. There is no excuse for it, I don't care how many emails the person has in their box, I have tons at times as well but MAKE the time. If you are to formulate a 'thanks but no thanks' generic reply, the 'copy and paste' method exists for a reason. It's a 'do unto others' thing. Look at it this way, if this happens to you after sending someone a message and they are just too lazy or rude to send a response, you are better off without knowing them anyway. Next!!

K
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