| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 3/21/2008 9:33:31 AM | Most of the testimonials I've seen come from their friends telling me about what a great and cool girl she is. Well, yeah, I guess that's about what I'd expect her best friend to say. Kinda undermines the whole point to a testimonial.
The other thing about them that makes me lose interest in about two seconds flat is when in the testimonials, their friend or ex-lover writes something to the effect of "....and if you hurt her I will personally mess with you !..."
Yeah, that's exactly what's going to reel 'em in ; Nothing works as effectively in attracting a potential mate as allowing your friends to dictate who is good enough for you and who isn't. Moreover, is that a harbinger of things to come if I contact this person ? Every time something goes wrong, am I going to hear about it from her friends and have them interfere in what's almost certainly none of their business ?
I don't really care what might be meant by statements like these. I know what they mean to me and that's why I find I have little use for most of the testimonials I see. They're either biased or they act as repelents with their hostility. | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 3/21/2008 9:44:09 AM | I definitely think they're bogus and I usually don't look twice at someone that has a gahzillion "favorites," either. Means they've been here awhile and still either haven't found who/what they're looking for, players, or are forever fishing. I especially find the one that some gal keeps doing that is the "GORGEOUS" thing just the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen! Major turn off. The guys that see that on THEIR post are in obvious need of a major ego stroke. Not my cuppa.
I am of the same opinion that if this person was SO spectacular, why are they still in the pond and not swimming up stream with another fish?
Hmmm.
Moon | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 3/21/2008 9:47:25 AM | This is a good one! I think it's 50-50 But i would love to hear woman's point of view cause of lately i been noticing woman getting a bad perception once the see my profile, And I'm not one to delete Testimonials even the ones where they have trash me. lol good for me she forgive me and deleted it her self. But like i said b4 it could be a good thing and a bad thing.. I some times feel that some woman get intimidated.
Feed back is appreciated | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 3/21/2008 9:59:39 AM | I definitely think they're bogus and I usually don't look twice at someone that has a gahzillion "favorites," either. Means they've been here awhile and still either haven't found who/what they're looking for, players, or are forever fishing. I especially find the one that some gal keeps doing that is the "GORGEOUS" thing just the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen! Major turn off. The guys that see that on THEIR post are in obvious need of a major ego stroke. Not my cuppa.
I am of the same opinion that if this person was SO spectacular, why are they still in the pond and not swimming up stream with another fish?
This is what I'm talking about! It's usually woman like this Insecure, divorced(not knocking on being divorced, I'm in that club) Some what out of shape that hate on Men
that are taking advantage of being single again and can afford and attract Woman and not wanting to commit< we tend to forget that dating means just that! What ever happend to exploring you're options i hate when woman sterotype you as a player just cause you date more then one girl.. I think as long as one is honest and up front with her from the start then it should be okay,Then that person has the option on what to do and knows whatt to expect. Ps this is i dating site! D a t i n g | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 3/21/2008 10:07:19 AM | testimonials are not neccessarily from dates, i have been on pof a while now and have made some good friends on here, the first one on my profile is from a girl we got chatting nd became good friends and the 2nd is from a guy in the us and hes sound so its not always about people that have dated person, its to give others an idea what the person is like..lol...you will know what i mean when you are on here a while, take care...ruth | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 3/21/2008 10:15:59 AM | Pretty much echo the ones who don’t like Testimonials, for similar reasons. They're either done by friends who obviously wouldn’t have anything bad to say or the opposite gender who secretly want to date the person in the first place. I rarely look down to the bottom of the profile screen to even see them, let alone read them. It does seem the ones that have 400+ Favs also have a few Tests. That tells me they’re on here for friends and not anything serious. That’s certainly fine by me (many people are on dating sites for friends only); just say so in your profile.
 | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 3/21/2008 10:19:19 AM | Yeah, I don't quite understand them either. I mean, you have a few GORGEOUS testimonials that are all the same--if it's not spontaneous, but the same thing every other one says, why bother? Yeah, and if someone thinks you're the perfect man/woman, why are they advertising it to other people, so somebody else can come along and grab the best thing you ever had or want? Yeah, it'd be great to be able to say what's terribly wrong with someone, but then no telling what's going to show up on your profile.
I think it would be great to have anonymous notes, or anonymous postings when someone does something really hurtful to another--but then there's always Bambi to think of - If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 3/21/2008 10:22:25 AM | | i think the testimonials (if sincere) can be a better indicator of a person's character, than how many favourites they have/don't have, as they seem to be random and could be for any reason, whereas a testimonial is personalized | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 5/8/2008 6:18:30 PM | I've had but one testimonial on my profile my entire time here - from a very dear lady. She's a dang good person, but not someone I'd ever have the good fortune to know more intimately. I trust her with things I don't let anyone else know, even in the "real" world, and she has done the same. She has touched my life and made it better. In short, she's a friend.
And I'd be a dadblasted fool of a friend were I ever to delete that testimonial. If it bothers a potential date (not that there are many in my neck of the pond), then that fish is not for me.
Just annudder thought...
Annudder | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 3:58:40 AM | | Very eloquently stated. I would think a "potential date" migth become a "steady date" if they read further on your profile and checked out this post. It makes me feel remiss in not writing a testimonial about some of the gentlemen I encountered on this site. I had been out of the pond for quite some time and had them welcome me back when they rediscovered me. How nice! Alyssa | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 4:36:39 AM | Of course your friends are going to leave you a good testimonial, that's the whole point hence the meaning friends. For those that say they wont contact a person with testimonials or they are bogus, sucks to be you because we will never know will we.
Again why are people so concerend about other profiles.
Some say why is this person still here if they are so great, they might be a great person but no one said they are perfect. Also they might want to stay on here and date or meet people in general just as friends, it has been working great for me.
I didn't understand the testimonial thing at at first, but I have changed my way of thinking. We are all here to attract people and it is another tool that serves some people well and I can see were it would turn some people away ,isn't it great to have the freedom of choice.. | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 5:19:23 AM | LOL...yeah, esp when the testimonial left is a single man, (when I'm observing women's profiles), it just makes me wonder why she isn't dating THAT guy (the one leaving the testimonial).
<div class='quote'>Again why are people so concerend about other profiles.
Because, we wouldn't have much in message board content otherwise. LOL!
I agree- having prospective or past dates write about the person in the profile might be a bit icky
Notice that you've never seen a profile critiquing the person (or saying anything bad about their date, lol) The person with the profile can delete testimonials. Like, "Eats with his hands" or "Burps outloud", etc. lol | |
|
| |
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 6:40:48 AM | The testamonials here are silly. Of course your friends are going to give you an awesome review! They're your friends!
I get a kick out of seeing the same group of people writing about one another in testamonials...It's nice they all support one another, and I guess if anything it shows perspective mates that they have a few friends...but that's all it means to me. | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 6:42:42 AM | I'm not into testimonials. I met two men here who had testimonials on their profile.
Sometimes on the surface a person can be outgoing and fun. Once you start dating them you learn there is a totally different side to their personality.
The testimonials on the one man came from women who had never dated him so they had no clue how bad his temper was. (Jekyl/Hyde) They only saw him as fun and outgoing. By the third date, he was screaming about anything and everything, it was frightning.
The other had women saying they didnt know why he was single because he is so wonderful. I do! I met him one night for an hour and he came from work and smelled all sweaty and nasty. Not a good first impression. Then he proceeded to write to me accusing me of seeing all these men as if he was some jealous controlling owner of me. Yikes!
So, based on those two experiences, I dont believe in testimonials. If these guys are so wonderful , why arent those women dating them? | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 6:47:34 AM | | Oh yea! The Favorites List! If I see a man is on tons of favorites lists, its a turn off to me. Im not looking for a player or a serial dater. I get put on alot of lists and then the guy never writes to me. What's up with that? If I dont hear from them in a day or two, I delete myself off their list. Im not into ego boosters or out for most popular. I'd just like to meet someone I can enjoy being with. | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 6:52:45 AM | Guess that all the men who are have hundreds of womens testimonials:
They are serial daters.
They are very good players
The women should be reading between the lines (cos if he was that good they would be dating??)
Its the same as people adding you to their favorites and never chatting at all (what is that all about)
Men with lots of women leaving testimonials turns me right off and can get him blocked quicker than if he was rude to me on first message Especially the ones that say - 'this man is my best friend everrrrr' what is that all about?? | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 6:55:18 AM | i'm glad the testimonials are available. a testimonial can be a nice thank you note for friendship, whether it be local or on line. occasionally i see testimonials from people met at events and they make the person sound fun, friendly, and sociable. i like that!
sometimes i gain a bit of information that i never would have had - and yes, to be honest, that information can be a big negative for me. i get to see who they associate with and who they've dated. even who they spent a long romantic weekend with and what a good breakfast chef they were...or how they really want to be together and distance is the only thing keeping them apart...or how i will surely be captured, tortured, and killed if i don't treat him like a king.
thanks! good to know!
| |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 7:19:34 AM | | personally i look at the persons favorites and then i look at testimonials (if any) .to me they are a big turn OFF . I never sign up to be on someone's favorite if i have to have competition then i'd rather not even start. | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 7:25:09 AM | Never thought of the competition side of the Testimonial, of course if they are in love but distance is keeping them apart, he might just up and move to be with her.
Oh and how many roses he has sent out can go against him too, if both have gone he is after two women in one month.
If one has gone he is trying hard with one woman, so its like a hands off till he has a month with two roses to give | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 7:43:51 AM | I can only speak for myself, we all have different experiences, and don't think the same (nor should we).
I have had more than a few times that I'll start chatting with someone and after a few emails some say they read over my testimonials and let's just say it was all positive. They are all friends, there isn't anyone I've "dated" (only a handful I've even met) that has a testimonial posted. So maybe it's different in that it's not from people I've been romantically involved with, but that's just my experience. It's all been good I haven't received one negative email about my testimonials. | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 7:46:47 AM | | I didnt think about the Roses but you are right! Im not looking for a serial dater but I do understand if he is talking to more then one person at a time. I talk to more then one but it doesnt mean I meet them all. I have only met two since I started in December 2007. You can usually get an idea of what someone is like just writing or even calling and decide if you want to meet. Actually, I really shouldnt have bothered with the two I did meet. lol | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 8:23:33 AM | Like this site,and anything else you can take it with a grain of salt. When one reads the testies here; it can mean various interpretations or misinterpretations.
For example; here are just a few,
aka, what the said person said,they are......
[1] Knowledgeable and honest.
[2] Has substance and character,
[3] Friendly to me since I this is my only way of meeting people.
[4] She got nice boobs, what's not to like.
[5] We were a good match but if only we lived closer.
[6] Treat her right.
[7] If you lucky enough to meet her.
[8] A self deluded Dear John letter just in case you change your mind.
I can see why there are a lot of folks who have 'sour grapes' or get turn off about testies or fan fav's list,and it's just up to you to see beyond the trees or boobs to see what's really inside the person.
When I first came to this site I was somewhat apprehensive also until I read between the lines and what it all really means if anything at all about the person or is it more about the person who wrote the testie for there self saving ego.
I adore people who have substance and grace and have no problemo in letting it be known.
have fun...jj  | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 10:29:40 AM | | testimonials seem like ego stroking, and keeping one up seems like narcissim. if i got one, i'd probably send the person a thank-you note and delete it (i assume you have the ability to delete those things). if i'm looking at a guy's profile and he's got a mini female fan club i'd be asking myself why none of those women are dating him if he's so perfect, and i'd probably be a bit more inclined to think that he's a player. i pretty much think a person's profile should be what they use to sell themselves, testimonials seem like laying it on extra thick. kinda like they need assurance and affirmation to feed their ego. | |
|
| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 10:37:31 AM | | The testimonials are a bad thing! Ive read some really nasty stuff about people who were (in my opinion) nice. Then there are the idiots...Maybe they forgot the "Don't kiss and tell" rule. The tetimonials should be discontinued. | |
|
Home
login 
