| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/16/2007 8:35:00 PM | | Personally I can do without the testimonials, but that is just me. I am sure some like it, but I have to wonder why all these people are saying very nice things about you, and you are still single. Why the hell didn't they snatch you up. I can understand why women post testimonials about their friends. But not the other. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/17/2007 11:43:10 AM | You realize of course that we could never be friends. What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form - is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way. Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her. Even the unattractive ones, they pretty much want to nail 'em too. Even if they don't want to have sex with you, the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story.
Incidentally, 90% of this post was plagerized and does not necessarily reflect the opinions of the poster. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/17/2007 11:48:34 AM | ^^ I hope not.
I have a ton of male friends who don't want to have sex with me   
The testimonials are a nice way to share love with those you like, but don't want to date. Period. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/17/2007 12:19:13 PM | VainH - nice "When Harry Met Sally" quote...
d-belle sums up testimonials very nicely above.
Because if we wanted to be with everyone we ever be-friended -- we'd all be too busy building harems to post in the forums  | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/17/2007 2:38:19 PM | | I find alot of testimonials to be phoney. They are usually too bostful to the point to make you think the person made a fake account and wrote it themself or told the person exactly what to write. Maybe its trust issues, maybe im right..either way...i dont give credit for testimonials because I would wrather form my own opinion by getting to know the person..not basing it on something someone else has experienced. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/17/2007 2:52:44 PM | I think it depends on what the testimonial says and who says it. The only ones that turn me off are the ones that say what a great lover the man is (saw that today on a profile). That's great but, I'm looking for more than just sex. I've seen one or two that have men saying they are looking for women their age but every single testimonial is from some young babe scantily clad spouting off how they would snap this guy up if they weren't too young for him yet they talk to him all the time and are great friends.....who wants to deal with that?
Frienship testimonials don't bother me at all! | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/18/2007 11:27:45 AM | I agree with DestinyAwaits....I have two friends who wrote testimonials about me and I appreciated it, it's nice to know that they think I'm a good person.
As for the testimonials from prior dates that men have had, well this is a turn off for me 100%....I wouldn't even bother with someone who has a testimonial that states how great they are in bed or what an amazing kisser they are....you know what that means....they most likely had a "one night stand" and I know this isn't something I am looking for.
I guess what it all comes down to is if the men and women want to scare off a potentially good relationship with someone they may want to decline having someone saying how great they are in bed etc....it's all what you want to project on yourself (and for those profiles that have "hanging out" this is a dead giveway of what the guy wants...I tend to stay clear of those profiles....whatever floats your boat
Happy Fishing :) | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/18/2007 3:24:50 PM | ALL of my testimonials are from Young women. They are all my friends. YES I am looking for a woman close to my age.
They are all positive messages and NO I will never delete them.
All my friends that are close to my age are married and not on POF.
I do read women's testimonials. TRUE I would like to get to know a person myself and make my own opinion. Still a nice testimonial never hurt. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/26/2007 5:55:41 PM | | im not sure if im going to be blasted for this message but time and time again i read testimonials left by people of the ones they have met.....and time and time again i see..."the best person in the world" "the sweetest kindest most caring woman/man ever" "ive had the pleasure of meeting this most wonderful person and cannot believe that this person isnt snapped up in a hurry so you out there come and get them quick they wont be on the market long"...what the heck is up with that??? it so makes it look like the person they are leaving testimonials for are really great people.....BUT they were either ditched politely(like you soooo werent their type) so that they stay friends...or someone you definitely dont want(probably cause YOU really couldnt see yourself with this person but think others would....i laugh when i read those messages, i think testimonials are actually a ridiculous feature but seeing since it makes me laugh so much reading them they should keep it lol...anyhow i just wanted to add my piece....and yes i do like this site just had to say something lol | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/26/2007 5:57:16 PM | | ahhhh had i read the former messages i would have seen that others have the same comments as I....i was actually about to post the above reply to a new thread but then checkd to see if there was one already...i guess i am not alone in the thinking that testimonials are actually...really pathetic lol | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/26/2007 6:03:10 PM | S_C here:
Just going to paste some of what I wrote in the thread B.E.D. started (which was closed for redundancy)...
In my personal experience on the site I have found that the longer I have been on the site and participated in the forums and attended the parties and actually started to get to know the people behind the profiles - that I did (and others will) create real friendships if they have a positive attitude.
Now I haven't written testimonials for all of my friends... but as the mood strikes me, I do write them for some of them.
And not everyone I've written one for has written one for me either.
But that's not the point of the testimonials. I write them for my friends because I want to share how I feel about them or how they make me think et cetera.
And a number of them have written some for me as well and they are all accurate and truthful. They may not highlight what some people may perceive as my negatives (I'm not much of a cook; that I begrudgingly do housework; I am not a morning person; I get stressed out when I drive etc...) but they do shed light on a lot of my positives that may not be immediately apparent to someone new.
And, since I am happy with B.E.D. - I don't have the testimonials up to draw people to me, I just have them there to remind me that there are people who care about me and who know me for who I really am. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/26/2007 7:44:37 PM | | thats awesome soul_mates i think that if you find someone you connect to or become friends with its great to tell about it....i think my point was by almost all the ones i have read (not all but most) the person who is leaving the testimonial seems like they are saying..."this person is the best dont pass them by, they wont be single long" ((makes it seem like there is something wrong with them or else why isnt the person leaving the testimonial with them if they are such a great catch?)) and i mean that for men leaving messages for women and vice versa as for any others well to each their own....if they are leaving messages about how great a person they are and how much fun it was to meet them that is one thing but adding that bit about ....."they are a great catch" or "dont miss your chance with this one" it sounds...phony and pathetic....i personally would leave a testimonial to someone i met that i became friends with or even got real close to and would just state what it is about this person that is great but to......well...."advertise" for them seems really....pathetic | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/26/2007 8:59:28 PM |
i have read (not all but most) the person who is leaving the testimonial seems like they are saying..."this person is the best dont pass them by, they wont be single long" ((makes it seem like there is something wrong with them or else why isnt the person leaving the testimonial with them if they are such a great catch?)) and i mean that for men leaving messages for women and vice versa as for any others well to each their own....if they are leaving messages about how great a person they are and how much fun it was to meet them that is one thing but adding that bit about ....."they are a great catch" or "dont miss your chance with this one" it sounds...phony and pathetic....
Keep in mind... testimonials are just opinions and if the person is a keeper, yet not kept, and iif the person is still single for a long time when the testimonial staes otherwise... obviously many are in disagreement of that opinion (testimonial).
For the most part, testimonials are written with bias... leave it at that. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/27/2007 9:05:49 AM | This is Blue eyed Dad...the "B" side of Soul_Mates.
Anyway, the way I feel about testimonials, is that saying that a person is wonderful, and a "great catch" etc, is entirely true. It doesn't mean there is anything wrong with the person, because they are still single. Or that they are a loser. Some people just don't match together, for whatever reason. They may judge each other as fantastic people, but just not for each other. There are a ton of reasons why people are not compatible. I've been with some fantastic people here, had a couple of relationships. Does that make me a bad person or a loser, because we are not together anymore? What about them? Are the women spinsters or old maids or too picky because they are not with anyone? No. Physical attraction is fine, but it's the day to day compatibility which is key. So I think testimonials are a great thing, just because a person is described as a great catch, and grab this one quick etc and they are still single, doesn't make them any less desirable. And what's wrong with a little advertising?
My 2 cents...for what it's worth | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/28/2007 5:39:24 PM | Do I really need to see 7 beautiful women that didn't make the cut to impress me? No, not really. Do I need to see a bunch of women gush at how wonderful he is at giving back massages, foot massages and what a great friend he is.....blahahah..... no thanks! You can keep the testimonials.
I would rather find out on my own in getting to know someone and how they interact with their children, family, dealing with life and how they make the most of their 90 short years. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 2/28/2007 7:20:32 PM | some of the testimonials I've read indicate that the person is a saint, too good to be true, true gentlemen and scholars. If these guys are so perfect why are they still looking? and why aren't these women snapping them up?
Yes, I find testimonials too over rated and full of it. I prefer to find out for myself, and not rely on someone woman's rantings and ravings. They were probably on prosac. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 3/14/2007 12:59:00 PM | is there way to see who someone has written testimonials for...
what i mean is this....lets say i click on a womans profile, i can read who wrote testimonials for her.....but is there (or can you add a feature) that alows me to search for ALL the people she gave testimonials to.
The reason i ask is, I was searching women in my local area..just browsing random profiles..and i find 3 , that all have a testimonail form this same guy..and they were all almost cut and paste....and over the next lil while i had noticed at least 10 women this guy had left testimonials for ....and they werent "friends " ones....point is this guy was writing testimonials for every girl he ever had a 15 minute coffee with. Kinda takes away any validity of testimonial....you know me for a day..how do you anything about me..anyhow..just curious | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/7/2007 2:02:00 PM | this is a great site ,no holds barred its what you make of it of course, there is no majic everything comes from people .. but i still say someone needs to start a thread called"For a good time call" im sorry if you dont think thats funny. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/7/2007 8:19:40 PM |
i hate reading testimonials because it makes me think "if this person is so great why arent YOU dating them?"
You know I laugh when people say things like that.
Before I took a break from POF, I had I think 8 or 9 testimonials.
Why was I not dating them? One of them I did, things didn't work out, and it was mutual.
There are so many reasons that encompass the whole "why aren't you dating them?" answer. I want kids, some do not, but we're great friends.
Some live way too far to make dating a viable possibility.
Some are much, much older, so obviously the dating aspect wouldn't be there.
Really, think about what you're asking, its' no different than why you arean't dating your friends. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/12/2007 5:57:36 PM |
But, if a person is on a number of favourites lists and has NO testimonials, I'd wonder why they didn't have any friends singing their praises.
Probably because allot of people add other people to their friends then don't chat to them. I have allot of those. The friends list is not really an indicator of how many people someone chats to and or meets. | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/14/2007 7:02:32 AM | I dont agree that there a turn off
remember they are coming from ppl who have met you ..got to know you etc.
I dont ask for them (like some do ... thats just grasping for interest lol)
Its a nice surprise to see one show up and I always give one back in return | |
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| Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ?
Posted: 6/14/2007 12:46:31 PM | | well actually i just got my first testimonial and it is from a close friend of mine. it really hasn't changed the fact of people wanting to respond to me/message me so i'm not sure what the use of it is | |
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