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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/15/2007 9:05:52 PM | It depends what sort of impression they gave you?
was it something imparticlur? or just BAD like creeped out scared for your safety ect..
If they gave you that sort of impression before you met them, why would you bother?
If you feel bad in your stomach about them, the chances are very slim the "meeting" will be a positive one. | |
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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/16/2007 7:07:58 AM | Well^^^^like first it wasn't a creeped out feeling.......it was something they did to me without even knowing me, and it got back to me. I was very hurtful and disgusting behaviour.
And this was WOMAN, not a man.
Now I have attended POF events, at which they have been, and to my face this person is trying to smile and be friendly, they have even attempted to talk to me, and the more they try the more I want to "puch" ... and violence is not in me, so the anger is building up.
Do I just confront them next time I see this person or do I keep avoiding them all together? Forgiveness is not an option on this one, because anyone who can speak ill of you beforethey know you (or even meet you!!!!), I don't think deserves this.
Everyone has given lots of good information and ideas as to how to handle this situation. But I am not avoiding being with friends or attending events because of this person. This is why i need insight. | |
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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/16/2007 7:20:08 AM | | I'd talk to the person, give them a chance to explain themselves, then decide whether or not they're just an oxygen thief. The full story is the best story......most of the time. | |
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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/16/2007 7:52:46 AM | | Wow the same thing happened to me when I first joined, this person hadn't even met me but proceeded to talk behind my back and even when I first met her, she was unkind and I'm thinking what did I say or do to her? The second time I met her, she was so nice and I'm thinking hmmmm maybe it was just a bad first impression. Not a chance. I should have trusted my instincts and not had anything to do with her. Some women are just catty. Do you really want to be around someone like that? Why should you have to earn her respect? Count yourself lucky that you know her true colours and rise above her. Be civil but that doesn't mean you have to be friendly. | |
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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/16/2007 8:05:30 AM | | im constantly stickin my foot in my mouth. maybe some people try so hard to be nice or funny that they come across as rude or arrogant. lets face it, the self esteem cant be that great added to trying to impress someone or putting your best face forward, tongue tied dorky moves are sure to follow. everyone needs a second chance. to write someone off from a first impression seems a little uncompassionate. open your heart, take a chance, they might suprise you and thats a incredible feeling. | |
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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/16/2007 2:48:40 PM | I dunno...... I've talked to some people on line that totally gave me the creeps, and I'm not talkin 'bout the Trevor creeps either!
really tho, I'm glad I never met the ones that made me feel weird about getting together with them. Go with the gut feeling on that one!
ps. Trev you're still cool (i guess!). | |
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WWCND
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Joined: 3/9/2006
Msg: 33 | |
| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/17/2007 12:15:54 AM | that's why I have no woman-friends. THe last girls I was friends with... well.. one of them did something that was extremely ignorant and appalling and I haven't talked to her since. I just don't have time for that sort of shit in my life.
As for guys... ahh.. sometimes I give second or third chances, depends on the circumstances etc. | |
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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/17/2007 2:13:57 AM |
depends on the circumstances
Absolutely!!! i agree with you there 100%... but Everyone is Different and places where they draw the line.
if its a guy/girl... cheating comes to mind immediately. but dis-honesty is a toughie for me. i think that if (in my case) she endangers others on the roads (drunk driving, yea call me anal) its forgiveable but hard to forget. thus id ask nicely to hold the keys or use a different mode of transportation home.
-Brad | |
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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/17/2007 2:53:59 AM | Holy sh*t folks, this isn't Junior High School.
He said, she said, gossip, first chances, second chances....it's all crap.
People are people and you're one of them.
Do your thing, live your life.
Good grief  | |
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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/17/2007 5:19:03 AM | @ 2 up......well said!
OP, one thing you would have to be sure of is if "what got back to you" about this person is actually true!
You might know that story about gossip....Each time a story is relayed, it changes a little bit and by the time it gets to a certain number of ears, it's been completely distorted and is entirely different from what it orignally was. | |
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~Dew
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Joined: 10/20/2006
Msg: 39 | |
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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/19/2007 2:50:19 PM | If they did or said something disrespectful and didn't own up to it or apologize, then that's a red flag and they obviously have no integrity.
What if you said something disrespectful, apologized profusely and owned up to the deed several times, but the offended individual wasn't hearing any of it? Then what should you do? | |
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| Bad First Impressions...no second chances?
Posted: 1/19/2007 4:25:44 PM | I have to agree with Sassy.
TRUST YOUR GUT!
It gives you those feelings for a reason. But too often we let logic get in the way and we ignore those feelings. And low and behold, we only find out after it is too late that our gut reaction was right on the money.
Hmm? It is still telling me my message is too short. So I guess I will just wish everyone a happy weekend.   | |
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