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| Pay the Fiddler©
Posted: 8/12/2007 9:02:37 AM | ‘Twas A classy chassis had she
Said she’d share what she had there … with me!
- that part-time spouse
- cost me, me house
And … her lawyer is still billin’ me. | |
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| Flurry©
Posted: 8/12/2007 9:10:07 AM | This old man from Missouri
Is no longer now in a hurry
- don’t know his name
- or from whence he came
Just writes his prose in a flurry | |
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| Flurry©
Posted: 8/14/2007 8:08:27 AM | He offered me a partner - 'activity',
and boasted many a proclivity,
but nothing was active
or even attractive,
the 'affair' suffered lack of long-livety.
(Got any bros in Oz EG?) | |
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| I’m Back©
Posted: 8/14/2007 10:36:19 AM | Returned from the ol’ Land of Oz
(Dorothy and Toto - part cause)
- Toto did bite
- Dorothy “ain’t right”
(Those Munchkins were little outlaws!) | |
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| Ain’t Right in Oz©
Posted: 8/14/2007 10:46:04 AM | In Oz most things … they had a glitch:
Bricks, from red to yellow did switch
- And … those monkey things
- flying with wings
And … water’s REAL bad – ask the witch! | |
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| Hilltop Union©
Posted: 8/15/2007 6:54:09 AM | To the hilltop went Jack and Jill
Jack asked her: “Are you on the “pill””?
- “Yep” said she
- but “nope” they would see
(The new arrival was named “Daffodil”) | |
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| Hour is Late©
Posted: 8/16/2007 12:08:32 PM | Flynn and O’Neil had been drinkin’
(A natural state, I’m a-thinkin’)
- Flynn said: “Hey, mate …
- Ya’ think it is late?”
Must be … ya’ve turned into a pumpkin! | |
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| Stuck©
Posted: 8/16/2007 12:22:54 PM | Sean, (on a date with a stripper),
Was confident he would soon “dip” her
- he whimpered and cried
- but hard as he tried
He couldn’t undo his stuck zipper! | |
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| So! THAT’s How it Works©
Posted: 8/16/2007 12:30:45 PM | Technology – that was the worst
Six times said: Hello, then he’d cursed
- when the phone it would ring
- (he hated that thing!)
But mate … you must pick it UP first. | |
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| The Way To Go©
Posted: 8/16/2007 12:44:29 PM | Ah …McVey, McDool and O’Bimm
Not one of the men could they swim
- a smile their format
- for the beer vat
They drowned in was filled to the brim. | |
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| Oh, oh ... ©
Posted: 8/16/2007 12:49:52 PM | Look! Up in the sky … it’s a bird!
No, it ain’t … you ignorant nerd!
- it’s a Sidewinder Missile
- slick as a whistle
It’s comin’ this way … OH DAMN! | |
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| Oh, oh ... ©
Posted: 8/16/2007 6:50:15 PM | Hairy, contrary and rough,
Some guys are diamonds, but rough,
Walking the plank with a pirate
Would make me shiver and gyrate,
Now where do I find all that stuff? | |
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| Home Fridays©
Posted: 8/16/2007 7:26:01 PM | On Friday nights I’d be drinkin’
Flirtin’ with gals, and a-winkin’
- but now I’m too old
- Hell, I’m startin’ to mold
I’ll stay home this Friday I’m thinkin’ | |
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| No Use©
Posted: 8/16/2007 7:34:39 PM | At my age my eyesight’s still good
(Hope it stays there, too … knock on wood!)
- but my mind it’s all gone
- like the grass on my lawn
But … never used it when I could! | |
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| A limerick...to be sure...
Posted: 8/17/2007 5:50:03 AM | There once was a man from Glen Hewer
who wished that his children were fewer
so one condom he slipped
then one more on his d1ck
that makes two, to be sure, to be sure... | |
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| A limerick...to be sure...
Posted: 8/17/2007 6:42:04 AM | Two condoms were needed for slipping
When progeny numbers needed clipping?
Perhaps not to have fewer
To be sure to be sure:
He was turned on by rubbery double dipping. | |
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| A limerick...to be sure...
Posted: 8/17/2007 7:45:22 AM | There once was a double dipped bloke
who really hung out for a poke
he fished in the pond
and it wasn't too long
till the dating game left him flat broke! | |
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| A Baudy Limerick...to be sure...
Posted: 8/17/2007 11:19:39 AM | How about a mullet?
Once was a double dipper
Brother of Jack the Flipper
Rolled her on her tush
Gasped at her bush
Knew he would have to clip her
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