| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 12/1/2007 9:02:47 AM | IMO, it's all too easy to say, "I can't find anyone to love me because I'm fat!" And I speak from experience here; the first two years after my divorce, that was precisely my thought process. But here's the thing: I was pissed off, angry, a tad bitter, and with a chip on my shoulder far bigger than my ass. As much as I *thought* I wanted to meet somebody, it wasn't gonna happen. Not because I'm a big girl, but because I was putting off a very strong vibe that said, "KEEP AWAY"!
Once I got right with me, and was willing to open myself up to taking a chance and actually caring about someone else, I found that I didn't have any trouble at all getting dates with men who think I'm terrific, lovely, and sexy just the way I am.
Bottom line is this: why worry about the guys who aren't attracted to you? I don't want anyone who doesn't want me - all of me - just the way I am. That doesn't mean that the guys who aren't attracted to me are bad people, or shallow, or missing out. If I'm not right for them, so be it. I'm not looking for 100 men to want me; I'm looking for ONE man who'll want me as much as I want him. | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 12/16/2007 1:58:33 PM | I myself have been with mostly larger than avg women, nuttin wrong with it, as long as (as it has been said in this thread) hey carry themselves with dignity, not that they have to act tawdry to get attention either. mostly with the bigger girls though, I find that they do lack the self esteem, and end up throwing themselves out as a tawdry type. Love is love, it can be found in the strangest of relationships. Due to my size being avg, or a little bigger than athletic, I find that the skinny model type females don't wish to be with me, so your thoughts are not alone, people can be shallow, and picky all they want though, because . . there truly are plenty of fish . . .
The body line is not what is so important, it is the attitudes, and what the couple can find in common, and enjoy together. | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 12/17/2007 10:30:29 AM | Hey bishop6751
Thanks for posting your opinion from a big guys point of view. But being a BBW myself I have to say that I DO NOT date skinny men. I absolutely love a man with meat on his bones. Sorry to hear you can't get a date. If you were close to my neck of the woods I would take you out. I love to cook and bake. I Like a man that can handle all kinds of goodies. | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 12/18/2007 8:55:58 PM | well I am not sure. Somehow in the media, it gave men the idea that the perfect body is nice and slender, but I have that impression too with guys. I only like tall and slender guys with nice bodies. The reason why though, is because I used to be heavier and I had a hard time finding good guys. Completely aware of this though I dieted and exercised until I was at a weight that I was comfortable with. So if taking care of myself and hard work is what it takes to maintain a healthy weight then I just don't understand why others can't do it too. Theres no need to be gluttonous, or refrain from trying your best to be in good health.
To me its the same reasons why I dont date a guy who has no job or isn't trying to better himself. I work hard to get ahead in life so I just dont understand why he wouldn't do the same thing. Weight and goals included.. so maybe thats how they think too. | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 12/23/2007 3:31:57 PM | | Well, I've been both thin and very heavy, and now am somewhere in between. I've never had all that much self confidence in alota ways, but it wasn't always obvious because I always had a smile on my face and was known for cuttin up and all. I'm kind of a contradiction in a way...very outgoing generally, although I have a shy streak a mile wide and twice as long when it comes to guys I might have an interest in. Still, I never could see that my weight made much difference when it came to attraction. They either liked me or they didn't, and it ain't like there's been millions beatin down the door, but then where I live there wouldnt be if I looked like a runway model, so it don't make much difference . | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 12/23/2007 6:34:11 PM | | don't know about you guitar....but charles, I looked at your profile and if those pix are current, you AIN'T all that big...a lil past healthy maybe, but I wouldn't call you fat or obese at any stretch of the imagination. JMO | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 1/22/2008 1:27:55 PM | OK........after reading thru this thread, I'm going to reply to an observation I've made. Since first impressions of typed words and pictures are what "internet dating" is all about...........how about the fact that several women on this thread identify themselves as carrying "a few extra pounds" or "average" but who are clearly obese or BBW. How do they expect a man to respond to someone who is either not being truthful from the get go or who clearly does not have a true understanding of their own body type? I would think that they may be skeptical about what other aspects of the woman's life may not be what is expressed.
I happen to know several men who MUCH prefer BBW women as opposed to the petite, smaller built woman so I don't think it's all about a woman being BBW but more an issue of selfconfidence and an honest awareness of their own body type.
Just a thought................... | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 5/24/2008 7:23:14 PM | | There are many beautiful women of many sizes.I like them all as long as they are clean about their bodies.I'm a large man right now myself but I shower everyday.The thing about me is my weight.I've been underweight and overweight so many times in my life.Right now I'm in the overweight mode.I think this is why I don't focus on weight when dating someone.My last girlfriend was a BBW but it's wasn't the weight but religious different in our case.She was catholic and I'm an atheist.It just didn't work. | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 5/25/2008 9:06:24 PM | TO ALL women...
There are plenty of men out there that would love to date a BBW. Everyone seems to be bashing men because of a few personal opinions. One mans preference doesnt make it every mans preference. I am overweight. I am the heaviest I have ever been in my life, but i am happy with me. If a skinny minnie or a BBW puts herself out there with self confidence and self love then they are bound to get a response. You cannot assume that people arent attracted to you because of youe weight unless they tell you that. I know there are some men out there that judge a woman mainly on their looks, but who are we to judge them when we, ourselves, have our own individual systems for weeding out the men we dont want.
TO the BBW women who complain:
Its not about you weight alone. After reading this thread I can understand why some men would tuck their tails and run. A few women on here are calling men everything but scum. I wouldnt want to date someone who put me into a false sterotype.
TO ALL men:
Women come in all shapes and sizes with a vast range of personalities to go with the vast range of sizes. I applaud those who stand up for their beliefs, whatever they may be, but I do ask that you keep an open mind. Not all BBW are nagging hypocritical b*tches like we have been portrayed on this thread.
Good luck to all and Happy Fishing | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 6/2/2008 7:26:34 PM | WOW!! LOL!! This is sooo funny! reading all these reminds me of high school! People get over it. Everyone has there own preference and what they like is what they like. Maybe your just fishing in the wrong pools, who knows. I've been the skinny size 7 before and now after having a child am down to a size 12. But i am working on getting to a size 9/10. I workout and diet to stay healthy and be able to keep up with my daughter and for my job because it requires physical strength beyond your average strength.
I can personally tell u from my experience that at either size i didnt have any more luck with men than the other. Most men do only want sex when they meet a woman for the first time, its how you respond and come up with other ways to captivate and keep their attention that keeps them around. And if thats all their really interested in then they aren't worth the waste of time. Same can be said of women.
Personally i dont really have a "size type", but i do know i dont like my men too big or too skinny. Kinda in between i guess, rippling muscles are not a required.
But then again i dont want a toothpick either. I guess i should say i'd want a man as strong as me.
An guys/gals its a scientific proven fact that the premative part of our brains are automatically attracted to the physically fit and "glowing" members of the opposite sex. To that part of our minds it relates to thousands of years ago when you judged your mate on only looks alone, because if they were physically fit they were the ones who could protect and provide for you and be able to reproduce young with minimal or no problems and therefore prime specimins to breed with to ensure survival of the species.
Just look at other mammals species today and you'll see. Yeh i know, thats animals and we are humans, but in reality we are only animals too just with a higher brain power than most.
So to all those BBM and BBW, consider what u say and think, what "your standards" are and maybe you'll find that you've set them too high just like most other people. I know men and women who keep looking for the next best thing and overlook the best thing that ever happens to them because they have this preconcieved and unrealistic concept of what they think would make the perfect mate. While their looking for the nonexistent the are missing whats right in front of them. | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 6/4/2008 6:12:18 AM | but in reality we are only animals too just with a higher brain power than most
Although there are times one may have to question that little revelation too. Have you met some of my friends? 
-Suth'nBoy 
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 6/5/2008 1:07:08 PM | Big women need to date big guys. If you hit on a slender guy then he's probably not going to be interested.
I could not disagree more! I truly believe that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and that personality makes a person more than age, size, or color. What some people may consider Big and Beautiful, others may think obese, while other think, they are perfect in proportion. I consider myself to be either B&B or Could afford to lose a few pounds and someone may look at me as being Average or Voluptuous. There is an old saying, "Don't judge a book by its cover", well, don't judge people that way either. Just like you may miss the best read ever, you may just as well miss out on your true soulmate.
I personally have dated men smaller than myself, and shorter, and I have dated men larger and taller. The looks aren't going to hold my attention, it is their intellect and their ability to NOT be narrow minded.
LB72  | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 6/6/2008 8:12:37 AM | Most woman that label themselves a BBW
are indeed just mostly FAT...not just "big" in the descriptive sense
where on earth did this hair-splitting nomenclature come from......
Many men don't find FAT women particularly attractive...just
like some men are not attracted to SHORT women, or very TALL
women........some guys don't like blonds...or redheads..........
A FAT woman may indeed be a 'damn good woman', or she could
also be a pain in the butt..
Most FAT women are fat for the basic reason of a BAD DIET and
lack of exercise, not because of some 'mysterious health issue' or
an undiagnosed 'illness'..........Their "illness" so to speak is that they
can't shut their mouths, push themselves back from the table (or
computer), and change their lifestyles and eating habits. The same
goes for FAT men.
Some men also may not want to constantly 'pay' for putting on the
feed bag for a FAT woman........other men may not consider a
naked FAT woman a particularly sexually appetizing site, or
experience .......Some men don't care..............others do care and
represents a real hurdle in establishing meaningful contact and
a continuum of relationship.........
Men should do and pursue what they like........with impunity and
without retribution...........and so should women...
It's called freedom, and personal preference.......nothing evil or
nefarious about that. | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 6/6/2008 9:07:47 AM | Well.. This could get me in trouble..  I agree with a lot of what has been said.
But I don't think we should talk very heavy folks out of having any interest in slimming down either, with the idea that this makes no difference at all. Because it does. The bottom line is they will be a lot happier that way, socially, as well as an awful lot healthier and less prone to serious illnesses caused by that.
I agree too that it's what's inside that counts the most.. But likewise, outside counts too. Both things matter. And someone who is very heavy is less likely to be a person of good spirits in their personal life.
So while it's not all there is, and it doesn't make anyone a bad person either way, I believe health, fitness and personal appearance matter a great deal as well. We should always do the best we can with what cards we were dealt, seems to me.  Okay, I'm outta here!! 
-Suth'nBoy
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 6/7/2008 6:15:26 AM | hello there i am a full size woman ,,if a man is nice and treat be with respect i will go out with him i dont look on the out side i look on the in side ,,i see how you are talk and trat other,, ,,i wrote 1 or 2 on here and they dont speak back or they say you just nt my size i just say you miss a good think , i want more then just sex in my life,javascript:smilie(' ')
javascript:smilie(''),,,,javascript:smilie('')
javascript:smilie('') | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 6/26/2008 5:57:23 PM | | I completely agree with what you said Michele....I think a lot has to do with attitude and self confidence. To go a step further...there are certain qualities that prefer in men, such as I prefer dark hair and brown eyes, etc....but I don't automatically discount anyone based on the physical appearance. But there does have to be a physical attraction and a chemistry, no matter how much you care about someone if you don't have that spark, you just don't have it. I try to not put so much pressure on myself and the guys and just relax, be yourself and yes.....the right person will come along for all of us. | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 6/27/2008 8:43:38 AM | After all thats been said it just boils down to what everyone likes.....lordy lol. im not hurt or offened when a man tells me he dont like bigger ladies, its no different than me not likeing short men ! Come on you all move on and smiles when the time is right and fate is with us we will all find the one we are ment to be with. | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 7/4/2008 5:01:25 PM | | I personally think bigger guys are sexier. I am a BBW and feel awkward with skinny guys. Not to say if there was one who was attracted to me and had was a good person, I would definately give him a try. I have found that most men - even though I say on my profile that I am large- are just out for sex (never until I know you,) or can't get past my weight. I would love to meet someone close no matter what their size!! | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 7/7/2008 5:16:30 PM | Oh there are some men who like women period "BBW" or not.. But guess what there are a lot of BBW who want the perfect prince !!
The only reason they would date a guy who is a big or what ever is because they couldn't find anybody else...
Just my ex... | |
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| why dont men want a bbw who is a damn good woman?
Posted: 7/7/2008 7:12:36 PM | | Some guys (myself included) select profiles with the "few extra pounds" or "big and tall/BBW" filters checked. POF has no filters for "BBW admirer", so a larger girl doesn't have a handy way to search for guys interested in her body type. The BBW specialty dating sites are good for that, but the "pond" is limited. So, it's more difficult for larger women on POF, but on behalf of the guys here that prefer you, please don't give up! | |
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