| |
| Why Don't guys understand Just Friends
Posted: 9/9/2008 4:35:18 AM | (snuglbug) Ok Heres the deal...
I left my husband in june of '06 I am still married (an sign that I am not ready for anything serious) I am very clear when I meet new people I state my expectations in a way that can not be misunderstood. So after I say just friends and no love (I don't have the energy for that) do they "THINK" that they have fallen in "love".
I do not get along well with women so that leaves guys and you can not make friends if you are always pushing them away.
Simple: I have sex with all my friends.
Erik  | |
|
| Why Don't guys understand Just Friends
Posted: 9/9/2008 5:36:38 AM | Change your name. snuglebug suggests you intend to be more than just friends.
Do not claim you want to be friends FIRST. That suggests you wish there to be something else second. | |
|
| Why Don't guys understand Just Friends
Posted: 9/9/2008 4:11:46 PM | If I am interested in being more than friends with a girl that I just meet, and they drop the F-word as I call it. Good bye, I have plenty of friends. Maybe if she have other friends that I might be interested in then I might keep in touch.
One night I got the lets be friends and it's not you it's me.. Ouch that hurt... | |
|
| Why Don't guys understand Just Friends
Posted: 9/10/2008 1:22:00 AM | If you're such friends, why aren't you helping him to have sex with your female friends?
That's what friends are for, anyway. | |
|
| Why Don't guys understand Just Friends
Posted: 9/10/2008 5:14:04 AM |
If you're such friends, why aren't you helping him to have sex with your female friends?
That's what friends are for, anyway.
Bingo!
That's the perfect test of a true friendship not burdened with romantic or sexual desire.
So, you want to be "just friends" with a guy? Cool, get him dates with your single friends. No? hit the road.
So, you want to be "just friends" with a girl? Cool, get her dates with your single friends. No? hit the road.
Yes, it really is that simple. | |
|
| Why Don't guys understand Just Friends
Posted: 9/10/2008 7:47:31 AM | Omigod this is the most re-god-damn-diculous topic that ever came up in all of datingdom. I could write a book about how creepy women who want "guy friends" are.
This could possibly be the most insidious double standard inflicted on mankind by a woman ever.
When a woman says "lets just be friends" it's a major red flag that you are going to suffer major emotional abuse from this woman.
When a woman says that "I don't get along with other females" and that "I only have guys as friends" it's a major sign that this woman is a sociopathic predator and an emotional vampire that cares only about what she can recieve from people but never about what she can give or do to help other people.
Women like this have an endless supply of "friend ****es" to buy them drinks and listen to thier problems. I can't say that I feel sorry for these ****es though since they try to supplicate, they kind of deserve their misery. Doesnt mean I have to.
It would be different if these women actually offered you useful advice as a "friend" or helped you to hook up with other females as a "friend", but that would actually ruin the purpose of their game. Any woman who thinks that you are willing to settle for less and be her friend also knows damn well that you don't have the confidence to get a girl and that you are desperate for female attention otherwise you wouldn't be putting up with this "friend" garbage from her in the first place, because you would be too busy getting laid. Just like the guy this woman is probably ****ing and whining to her stable of male slaves about. These women know thier emotional tampons are clueless and they want to keep them clueless. They also know that if thier male slave did ever happen to score a girlfriend, albeit unexpectedly that the friendship or "supplication" from this schmuck will be over because no woman wants their boyfriend to be hanging out with a "harpytron" that enslaves men emotionally by the dozen. 
Oh yeah and did I mention that I and most men already have male friends?
Look, I don't mean to be rude OP. But either you are stupid or you know that you are playing games with people and like most women fail to admit it to yourself and everyone else. Sorry your marriage sucks, but that isn't anyone elses problem.
No one should have to give up thier basic humanity because of your failure.
How can you be so selfish as to try and impose your will on everyone and make everything on your terms just because your marriage sucked? Get a life and start going out with the gals for drinks for christ sake and leave these poor desperate schmucks alone. You can fuck as many guys as you want as long as you are being fair to all of them. But it's like many people have said previously in this thread, your guy friend is either gay or thinks you are ugly (which by the way would offend you waaaaay more than it would an emotional tampon when you tell him "you don't feel that way about him.) Or he wants to screw you. JUST THAT SIMPLE.
And ultimately if you knew that someone really didn't want to have sex with you you would try to get them to because your ego would be bruised so it's really just a catch-22 and a paradox. Just give it up. | |
|
| Why Don't guys understand Just Friends
Posted: 9/10/2008 7:55:32 AM | Here's something to ponder: Of all the women that I talk to and consider friends, they've never had to say to me "let's be just friends". It's never ever come up. And yet we get along very well and can talk about anything.
When a woman says those dreaded words, she knows what's up. And in those circumstances, I usually cut-off communication with them because it's easier on me. | |
|
| Why Don't guys understand Just Friends
Posted: 9/10/2008 8:17:49 AM | The whole "let's be friends" thing rarely works, most notably when one of the persons is attracted to the other.
Firstly, most of the time the offer is not a sincere one. They don't really want to be friends. It's a way of softening the blow of rejection, because no one really likes to reject anyone. When extending the friends offer, they're implying you still have worth in their eyes, just not in a romantic way. However, the subtext behind the offer is "we'll most likely never see each other again, although if we pass each other in the street we'll say a friendly hello."
Secondly, a lot of guys have this delusional idea that agreeing to be friends with a woman who they are attracted to is a great way to get her to change her mind about being involved romantically with you. This is nonsense.
If you choose to be friends with a woman, do it because you want to be friends with her. Not because you have ulterior motives. These motives which will get you nowhere, and cause you nothing but frustration.
A lot of guys express a sense of bitterness and cynicism towards the whole "friends" thing and often this is seen as an expression of anger towards women who they feel take advantage of their good nature (i.e. their dreaded "nice guyness!) But, guys who agree to be friends and harbour ulterior motives have no one to blame but themselves. Women often extend the "let's be friends" offer, and sometimes the offer makes total sense and might develop into an actual friendship based on nothing more than actually wanting to be friends.
But, if agreeing to be friends is going to cause a guy grief because his feelings of attraction get in the way, then it's imperative he reject the offer of friendship, regardless of whether it's sincere or not.
The default answer to "let's be friends" doesn't have to be OK! | |
|
| Why Don't guys understand Just Friends
Posted: 9/10/2008 8:51:08 AM | Re the Opost
"Why Don't guys understand "Just Friends""?
because Just Friends does not make any "sense" to us guys, the way "Just Friends" is described in the Opost at least.
2 cents | |
|
| Why Don't guys understand Just Friends
Posted: 9/10/2008 11:02:43 AM | | I think this is a common dating mistake that people make - they tell people that they would never ever date that the reason they are not interested in dating him/her is that they are not ready for a relationship, rather than just letting them know that they are not interested in him/her in particular. That leaves the person with hope that one day you WILL be ready, and then they can swoop in. I think there's probably a lot of men who are motivated to remain friends with a woman in hopes that one day they can sleep with her. There are also guys genuinely good at being just friends with women. The way that I think is best is if there is just no chemistry between a male and female friend. | |
|
Home
login 
