| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 1/30/2007 7:57:38 PM | | I think your out numbered here girl with our responses...no more double thinking!!! You will learn quick enough especially when your as old as we are. Not saying we are old now guys lol but she is a baby compared to us :( . Be strong and find yourself a cutie...this is "PLENTY OF FISH" !!!! | |
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| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 1/31/2007 10:43:52 AM | | Well when a man and a woman are bestfriends, they usually have very strong feelings for each other, but they also have respect for each other. Nothing will happen between them. She's his bestfriend and he would do anything for her. They probably grew up together and slept over each others all the time and that's not going to change for you. He should have allowed you to come though if it is innocent. She shouldn't mind if you come also. To be honest, if you did the same, he'd probably dump you. But that's life and you gotta deal with it. | |
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| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 5/1/2007 7:40:59 PM | Hmmmmmmm that sounds so fishy to me. If he had respect for you, and your relationship, he would find a way to bring you with him IF there is NOTHING going on between them two. I know for a fact that if you did that to him, he'd be upset, and not want you to do that. If I were you i'd dump him and FAST, you deserve better then that. I don't know how he can expect her to deal with this and be ok with it. If it was me, as soon as he was in his car and gone, it would be definately OVER, and i'd remind him of that. You can always do the same thing he's doing, and go spend nights at a guy friend of yours, and see what his reaction is , but two wrongs, don't make a right, and you'd be stooping to his level. Sounds like he's got more respect for his best friend then his girlfriend. Your young.......move on.....tell him to take a hike, and find someone that will treat you like a human being, and respect YOU.
DUMP HIM, I know i would | |
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| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 5/1/2007 9:24:16 PM | | I have friends that were girls. And I would stay at their place, but it would always be on the couch, never in their rooms. My ex or whoever I was dating would always be introduced to them, it wasn't a big secret since they were friends. But yeah, never in the bedroom. | |
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| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 5/1/2007 9:42:13 PM | I think you got your answer there m'lady.
Even years ago when I was a teen or in my 20's this would not be done. A man and a woman in one bed always has that ability to lead to sexual intercourse. I might spend the night with a friend. But only way I'd sleep in her bed is if she was sleeping with her sister.
And now that I am older I read these "F" buddies that people call friends. Scary to think people now pass up Morals to say its okay to have friends that you have sex with. Meaningless sex, so therefore your not cheating on your "Girlfriend" because it doesn't have meaning with it when you have sex with your friend.
He can sleep in her bedroom but you can't? That clearly means she is sleeping in there with him. I wonder who is sleeping on her livingroom floor and on her couch. Since they must also be occupied to prevent him from sleeping there or them from being able to put you up in those locations.
Imagine when you marry this person. He'll be sleeping with his friend once a year for her birthday until you get too fed up and divorce him.
Best bet is to leave him to his F buddy before the wedding date. Because trust me it cost a lot more for the divorce than it does to get married.
Let him know point blank no b/f of yours is going to gain your approval to sleep with his friends.
And it hurts to break a part, but it is best to do it now than later. | |
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| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 10/10/2007 11:17:47 PM | I agree with alot of what others have said..
something is fishy about this and you are correct to be having some red flags up.
My closest best friends are both girls AND ex girlfriends. i know without a doubt that if i had to travel far to see them , and they wanted me there and i had a girlfriend they would let her come too.
Not only that *i* would require it if they wanted me to actually go.
It many mean no hanky panky while there. My g/f must be able to come with me in that situation and they know this.. she would expect no less if she was in my g/f's shoes.
Not only that if i had lied or made up some silly exuces like this to keep you there. my best friend woulda called me on it and made sure i knew i was messing up and that it was not a cool thing to do.
IF my best friend thought my g/f was a total **** and couldnt get along with her then i simply wont get the invitation in the first place.
i suspect in this case that the sleeping arangements mught be a little too close and that you would object if you knew. perhaps he was expected to sleep in the same bed with her and maybe cuddle at least, but prolly more.
I somehow dont think that he is gonna be sleeping on the floor at the foot of her bed and instead he is expected to be part of her b-day prezzie.
but thats just what *i* would suspect. | |
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| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 10/11/2007 1:17:51 AM | | This sounds very fishy to me. He'll drive half the country for a woman that he's not dating but "friends" with. They're both resigned to the fact that they'll be sleeping in the same room. I'd make it damn clear he needs to rent a hotel and your going with him. That isn't right. They in my opinion they are more than just "friends" maybe fwb. | |
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| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 10/11/2007 2:14:45 AM | I've had many friends who are women over the years, and I've mostly found that girlfriends don't like you to have them - there's never been anything "going on" and until recently, it meant I lost quite a number of really good friends becuase of girlfriends saying "I don't want you seeing female friends". You're basically telling him to drop his friends and telling him he cannot be trusted, which probably doesn't feel good to him. It's no different to having friends of the same sex.
Nowadays, I don't see it as my problem anymore. I keep in touch with my female friends, and I'm happy to talk about it openly, but I'm not going to treat them differently to my male friends. | |
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| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 10/11/2007 3:10:21 AM | It's really hard to be just friends with members of the opposite sex, especially if one finds the other attractive.
His not wanting you to get to know the female friend should be an indicator that perhaps she's a friend with benefits. There are a lot of great single guys out there, but unfortunately females tend to go for the ones who all the other females go for, and then whine when the guy spends way too much time with other females. | |
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BNut
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Joined: 11/22/2006
Msg: 64 | |
| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 10/11/2007 6:24:30 AM | I don't know if this guy is cheating on you or not. I have close female friends who I've slept with (in the literal sense), even in the same bed, with no funny stuff happening. So sure, it's possible this is strictly platonic, but it's also possible there's something else going on.
However, this really stuck with me:
how can i get him to see that it hurts me? i have told him i dont want him doing it again and he said that, that upsets him and he says that i make him choose and he doesnt want too.
how can i get him to stop it or at least take me with him? its not that i dont trust him because i do and i have even said " would you like it if it was the other way around?" he has admitted he wouldnt. so why is it one thing for him and another for me?
Whether or not he's cheating isn't really the issue here. It looks like the two of you have trouble communicating, and it sounds like he's really unwilling to listen to your feelings or come to any compromise with you. There's no way you can build a relationship on that. I say dump the guy already, not because he might be cheating on you, but because you've been dating for a year and a half and he shows no signs that he's emotionally invested in the relationship. | |
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| help! boyfriend staying over another girls???
Posted: 10/11/2007 10:06:03 AM | | girl relax....the love of my life is living at his ex wifes house, and she is his best friend...I dont know her, but i trust that he is truthful, if you dont trust what he is telling you, why are you with him? | |
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