Missy
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Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 26 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 5:01:15 PM | -DC thank you again for the hug, sorry for getting boogers on your shoulder  I'm glad you didn't feel as if you were an orphan :)
-Smitten  for you I meant to do it ^^^there but I didn't for some reason. Thank you again for starting this thread. Bless your heart and I hope you found some solace here today. I know I did. I wasn't expecting this but I feel somewhat cleansed now.
-Di again thank you for your kind words you touched my heart today
~Missy~ | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 5:11:07 PM | anytime missy.........anytime.......... cuz thas what friends are for.........and me and smitten talk behind the scenes too........anytime you wanna just fishmail me......i treasure my pals........... | |
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Missy
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Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 28 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 6:32:43 PM | | lol at fishmail...thanks for the offer :) Have added you to my favourites | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 8:13:03 PM | | and im adding you to mine.......have a great evening....and remember tears are cleansing......and everything beautiful that grows needs water..........including our hearts....... | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 9:01:28 PM | Its been an interesting day and thanks to everyone who shared their experience on here, and passing along boxes of kleenex to missy and a hug ....Nice to see lady ^ passing along her smiles and hugs...its all about connecting.
I started this thread, since I didn't see anything similiar and from the emails, and comments I have received today, has touched me in ways that I can only express as, Thank you. I hope to see this thread continue with other people experience and hopefully all of us can show support, pass along kleenex or kind words, when someone shares an experience.
I know with my personality that I am never sad or blue for any length of time, since I won't dwell on my brothers passing, I am sure he wouldnt want it nor any of your loved one's. It's an ongoing learning process, this grieving, and If i could have a quick fix solution, I would have found it. Everyone who has shared with me, has allowed me to hear their story and emotions do creep up, even with the people who have lost dear friends & family for many years. When you think you're alone, you're not, and support is only a word, phonecall, email, personal friend or family and when you ask to vent to someone who understand, and appreciated the warm words and smiles that where shared, more than you will ever know.  | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 9:18:19 PM | From time to time while driving home at night I see two candles burning as I drive past a little makeshift memorial on a traffic island ... the pain and grief from the loss must be overwhelming for the family who has lost a loved one in a traffic accident.
Makes you really think... and drive little extra carefully. | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 9:36:29 PM | the biggest mistake i did,when my sister was killed
was advoided any feeling i had..i held every thing in ..
i had to be strong for my parents ,my kids and others..
i never talked about her,nor her death. and did'nyt visit till her one yr.
all the time before i acted like she was ,here but we just never talked..
the day of her one yr i went to the grave cause the family did..and it hit me right there,she was gone and never coming back,and omg did it hurt hard... i was distored and did'nt know what to do.. i felt worse then the day we left her at the gave..
that night i came home and wrote her a letter,and went and talked to her in her room,and went to the grave yr and promised her id never forget her and i was sry,for prenteding every thing was ok..and in time i started to feel better.. it'll be 5 yrs in june..at times when i miss her or need advise i'll talk to her..aome times my kids think im crazy but it helps me..and has for the past 4 yrs.. i found the letter is the best i have left a few ion her room and at the grave and thast where they'll stay... i did'nt think it ever gets easy but u learn to go on and know that they are for ever with u and no matter where u r they will be | |
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Shugo
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Joined: 4/6/2005
Msg: 33 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 9:38:23 PM | | To the first post:There are new studies in seasonal depression.There is heavy evidence that it exists but the factors are unclear to as why.Medication is very diffrent in treating this illness.Although i dont think you have seasonal depression it may have somthing to do with it, i dont really know how.It is completly normal and there are good reasons to greave long after a death of a close one.When you start feeling bad about yourself dose it become a problem. | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 9:39:09 PM | Some women get used to men that treat them like crap, and don't know a good thing when it hits them in the face. So when a guy who "Treats them like gold" comes along they retreat back to what they know, because sometimes that's all they know, and don't know how to handle a good guy.
Hope that has helped a little.
^^^^^^^
this is how my sis died..
there is a cross and a few other things out there
but still 5 yrs later i can't go see it ...maybe one day but not now..
it's too much to handle..but in time | |
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Missy
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Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 35 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 9:40:06 PM | Hugs sweetheart..and thank you for sharing with us too!
~Missy~ | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 9:44:44 PM | | Shugo: I don't know if you have lost anyone in your life...i am far from depressed...as everyone else has shared on this thread...but if i was...I know where i would be heading too ....Your bill will be mailed soon .... | |
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Shugo
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Joined: 4/6/2005
Msg: 37 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 9:49:54 PM | | Thank you this is why i choose the field i have.Im very caring and have the intelligence to master the art of psychology. | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 9:52:39 PM | Hi people,
Just wanted to say something here. I want to thank you all for all that has been said. I know the feeling of losing someone close and Have lost both my parents. I still talk to mom when she appears out of no where and pop well he shows in my dreams when I least expect it. Been since 95 for pop and in 98 for mom but they are always close by when needed. I have to go to Florida this friday to face it again with a younger sister and this thread kind of hit home tonight. Don't know how long it is to be for my sis but we received a call from hospice telling us that she was there. just found out later tonight she has been there since easter but we were not informed by the person she lived with. Long story but wil have an ending in its own. Only thing to do is to let her have a few minutes of not thinking of whats happening. Make her day a special one. But we know we are always with them. For they are for sure always with us no matter what we want to think about it. With them in our thoughts then we know they are not gone but they are waiting for the day that we are together again. Thx again people and take care. Oh for the one that spends the night in the graveyard don't worry about it. I spread my moms ashes on lovers leap so she could talk to the kids there when she wanted to, it was her wish. She loved the mountains and well the leap was just the place for her to make her where abouts be known. Later people and again take care and good thread. | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 9:54:53 PM | Some women get used to men that treat them like crap, and don't know a good thing when it hits them in the face. So when a guy who "Treats them like gold" comes along they retreat back to what they know, because sometimes that's all they know, and don't know how to handle a good guy.
Hope that has helped a little.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
k this i don't know where it came from...
i was responding to my guy that was saying about seeing a candle in traffice when some ones dies from a car wreck not this weird post ..hmmmmmmmm kinda creepy | |
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Missy
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Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 40 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 10:11:17 PM | Mound....I'm surrounded here (as is Smitten I just realised her and I live in the same town) and when I look at them in the morning light, I'll think of you and your sister and say a prayer for you both. Hugs my friend. If you need someone to talk to, I'm just an email away.
Take care and have a safe journey
~Missy~ | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 10:20:40 PM | Thx missy I will remember that but I am not going to face her going I am going to make her happy if for no more than a few minutes to make her forget whats happening. When she goes then I will face that. It struck me when it sank in and I alsomost broke but I know it is not over and i refuse to let it out now. I am not going for me i am going for her. And again thx I will remember and you are in my favs.
Tony | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/12/2005 11:39:49 PM | | Missy...Ya know...I bet your mom smiles down on you every time she sees you pick up the phone to call her...What a great compliment..She did something very right for you to have turned out the way you did...Trust that she is smiling down at you and at peace....When you hear that little whisper in your ear...or a light breeze on your face, embrace it and give thanks...redneckgirl133 | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/13/2005 12:09:34 AM | Moundpuppy
My heart goes out to you and your family and no its not an easy time, and I am glad that this thread was here for you to share...along with the rest of us that have expressed themselves. Its not easy to say good bye and by taking the time for your sister, will give her the peace she may need. big hugs to you...keep us posted when you want to...take care | |
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Missy
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Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 44 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/13/2005 10:33:41 AM | <-----smilin' and wipin away another drop from her eyes
Thanks RNG - man I love this place
When I was washing my face this morning I realised that I lQQk more like my mom now then I ever did before. I don't see it all the time but there are moments I'll walk by a mirror and I see her looking back at me. I hear her telling me things (like to not let my turkey thaw in the sink, to put it in the fridge) and I turn expecting her to be behind me and then I realise it was in my head and that I've most likely recalled a memory of her telling me that very thing in the past.
My mom had a heart bigger than anyone I know. She gave everything she had and always put everyone else first. She was the mom everyone else wanted. She was an amazing lady and I'm very proud to have been able to call her my mom. (why do I bother wearing mascara?.....sigh LOL)
Have a blessed day all
~Missy~ | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/13/2005 11:44:58 AM | | mound, i have fishmailed ya....if yer gonna be near lakeland....and i can do anything or just bring ya some coffee..............let me know..........and you gals all rock in my book.........ya'll know that dontcha? | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/13/2005 12:23:00 PM | i lost my dad just over 3 yrs ago now & i am still grieving for him to this day
i go up to visit his grave at least 3 times a week & i sit there for hours telling him how me & my daughter are getting on in life & how much we wish he was here to share it with us.
alot of people have said that i look like my dad & that gives me strength because it makes me feel like he is here with me & watching over me & keeping me safe
sadly my dad passed away two weeks before i had my daughter & i really wish that god had let him have a bit longer in life so that he could of met his granddaughter but i know he is up there looking down on her & keeping her safe & thats what helps me sleep at night knowing he is keeping us safe | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/13/2005 12:25:11 PM | Shugo said: ..."studies in seasonal depression.There is heavy evidence" Shugo... that seasonal deperssion in the northern latitudes is called "SAD"
SAD is a type of seasonal depression, usually occurring in the winter, which affects millions of people a year between September and April, with the peak occurring in the winter months of December, January, and February. True SAD is a seriously disabling illness, preventing people from functioning normally. In addition, millions of others suffer from a milder version called "subsyndromal SAD" or "winter blues," less disabling but still impairing and uncomfortable.
I "suffer" from SAD, and there are two treatments for SAD ... get a special sunlight lamp or head to sunny Mexico for a few weeks... Last January I chose the latter... Anyone wanna join me next year? (grin) | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/13/2005 12:25:14 PM | | hugs to ya busty, my dad and mom are my fave fishin buddies.......... | |
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Missy
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Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 49 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/13/2005 12:25:35 PM | Busty23 I'm sorry for your loss
and yup Di, I realised that yesterday.....you're pretty rockin too sista! | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/13/2005 12:36:39 PM | thank you missy & ladydi8
i didnt know my dad was dying until two weeks before he passed away & he told me he wanted to keep it from me because he didnt wanna give me extra stress on top of the pregnancy,at first i was annoyed but then in time i realised he was doing it to protect me not to hurt me & i thanked him for that i just wish id had longer with him so i could let him know how much he meant to me
i miss him every single day of the year,every breath i take he is is in my thoughts but ive found that it gets easy as the days go by but i dont think i'll ever really stop grievin fully i feelit was subside a little each day: | |
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