Missy
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Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 126 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/28/2005 8:28:32 AM |  for my sister I've never met VERY well put Smitten
~Missy~ | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/28/2005 9:23:48 AM | | im new to this site... readin all i can to try get a ideal of how or what to do in here.... it has been 11mo. snice i lost my husbun.. it will be one year may 24th.. this last year has had so many changes in it for me .. lost the love of my life loss my home car and job had to move in with my mom..... dealin with the everyday stuff is hard enough but when u add a big empty spot to your soul it makes life even harder ... i guess im doing ok im still here.... but....lots of days and nights i wish i wasnt ..im still young at heart and want to feel arms around me ... i never knew what lonely was until now ... i go to his grave a lot and talk to him...... everyone says he would want me to go on and live life to the fullest..... so i end up in here ...... a freind told me bout this site ....im not sure if im really ready for anything more than just meetin ppl as friends but im willin to try..... im glad yall have this subject on here ... i feel better knowin maybe theres a place i can fit in... | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/28/2005 9:48:08 AM | hi rose,
welcome and I know the feeling. Just lost one of my sisters this past week end. The people here are extra good and will stand with you. Just give them the chance. there is a lot of people here and a lot of threads to take your mind off of everyday things that keep you down. Browse around and enjoy. just keep your spirits up and look to the brighter things and it will work out believe me.
Moundpuppy | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/28/2005 9:51:55 AM | welcome rose..what a nice addition you make to tha pond.....sometimes we cry, sometimes we play......take what you need, join in when you want to....its all good and its always here.......there are times i cant sleep...and this site calms, cries, and laughs with you......
hi mound........you are such a sweetie........ | |
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Missy
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Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 130 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/28/2005 9:59:32 AM | Rose, I'm sorry for your loss...but man have you come to the right place. We're only a keystroke away if you need us.
Hugs
~Missy~ | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/28/2005 6:30:26 PM | @ Mound
First of all... thanks for sharing that with me (all of us). I am
lost for words here. I have been to the place you are speaking of, but have pulled
my self out with the help of my friends (all of you guys). When I first posted to this
thread I just wanted to let those that were here to know that my heart went out
to everyone. But found myself coming back again and again. It has helped tremendously,
I can't thank you guys enough for letting me share with you all. I have always had a
hard time expressing my pain other than to hide myself away and just cry or rant, just
what ever I was feeling at the time, but in the past week I have learned that it is fine
to feel this way and that there are others that hurt too, all in different ways and for different reasons but I do know that I am not alone. I know the pain will never go away, but it will
get better. As I said before if you ever need to talk, please feel free to contact me.
your a great guy | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/28/2005 6:35:13 PM | @ Rose, sorry to hear of your loss...
We give alot of these here and they all come from the heart.
As Missy said you have come to the right place, being here has helped me to
deal with alot that I couldn't before. There are a great bunch of people here,
that will listen if you need them to. | |
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Missy
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Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 134 | |
| support in grieving
Posted: 4/28/2005 10:05:38 PM | DC, you give the BEST hugs...thank you
 
~Missy~ | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/28/2005 10:17:45 PM | blushinrose welcome to the forum glad to see you here and sharing with us all. I hope to see you back and we're all here to give each other support, and double is great for his hugs.
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/29/2005 8:46:44 AM | Devil woman and I have found out that our brother's share the same name and its all about expressing oneself to others in how we feel in our lives.
There's no right or wrong way to grieve, or length of time it must be completed and no two people will grieve the same way for a family member or friend. How we cope with our feelings is the key to survival and for many, emotions are heightened and it can be very overwhelming to suddenly not be YOU. When someone dies, you truly find out who your friends are, since they can make a fast exit out of your lives. I also know that family becomes stronger or it falls apart and can divide individuals, which happen in my family due to many issue that surrounded my brother. Its all about respecting how another family see's it, you don't have to agree, but so many people argue or seperate further during a trying times in grieving.
I wish no one has to experience this, and for people, who haven't, they can sometime lack understanding to why you feel the way you do, can bewilder you and many lack empathy or compassion. I think other people behaviour when you grieve is sometimes out of fear, lack of information or they just don't get it. Remember for the one's that don't get it, they're people who understand what you're going through and will support you when you need to vent.
Hugs to everyone | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/29/2005 4:20:09 PM | Smitten, I'd like to think our brothers are looking down on us smiling.
I know that this kind of thing can do to a family my brothers death tore our family apart and took our mother passing away to bring some of us back together but things arent the way they should be.
I also wish that noone had to experience this and for the people that has never experienced it try to be more understanding to those that have. For those that have had to deal with this pull together as we have for the support we understand each other needs.
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/30/2005 11:45:38 AM | | ty ty ty thanks to all of u for makin me feel so welcome ........you all seem to be a understandin bunch of ppl...... im glad i posted ......lookin forward to being in the group ...... again thanks everybody. | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 4/30/2005 8:32:04 PM | To everyone that has been a part of this thread thanks for listening and giving your support, and sharing your own losses, my thoughts and prayers are with each and everyone of you, just hold on to your memories,and your loved ones will be with you forever, I came across this and thought i would share it with you.
Hold fast to your memories
they all add up to treasures
of fond yesterdays
that you shared and spent together
The special moments
will never change
they will be in your heart
today and forever.
Remember that your loss is shared
by many friends who care
and that you're in our thoughts and hearts
and even in our prayers.
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/3/2005 4:25:37 PM | blush: Welcome back and share anytime.
Devil: everyone in here, isn't far from my thoughts. | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/4/2005 6:46:05 AM | @smitten continue to keep me in your thoughts.
Will post poem as soon as I can. | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/4/2005 6:58:41 AM | Just wanted everyone to know I made it through Sunday.
I went to the cemetary with my kids and told them about
what I have been going through all these years and then read a
poem I had writtne for my brother. My girls were very understanding and
said that they understood why I had kept this to myself all this time, they
wished that I had shared it sooner so they could have helped me through
my pain. Although hard, I have made some peace with this and felt as if
some weight had been lifted off my shoulders. So I would like to Thank
everyone that was part of this thread for letting me share my story, it
helped alot to get it out in the open.
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/4/2005 7:12:42 AM | Now I would like to share the poem I wrote:
As I look at an old photograph.
And see your smiling face.
It brings joy to my heart and,
The pain can be replaced.
I remember who you use to be,
And the laughter that we shared,
So when the angels came for you
I thought it was so unfair.
Today I say farewell to all my pain
You told me to leave it here.
So I can go on with my life,
With nothing more to fear.
I'm trying hard to let this go.
It's been killing me inside,
The pain is so enduring,
I just want it to subside
You left me with your memories,
Your love will be my guide.
When things get rough and I thihnk of you,
You'll always be at my side.
It broke me heart to lose you.
But you didnt go alone.
Part of me went with you,on the day,
God took you home.
He understood what was going on,
And the sad look in your eyes.
He whispered "There'll be no more pain."
And he gave you wings to fly.
And thank you little brother for sending me,
The man I call my friend.
I know you made him special,
Cause its like having you here again.
He has helped me through my sorrow.
His guidance will never fade.
For he has taken me by the hand,
And now I'm no longer affraid.
So here I stand at your grave.
Where words are hard for me to day.
So rest in peace my brother,
And know I'll be thinking of you everyday.
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/4/2005 7:14:14 AM | to all above ...... let me shout you a 
and then give you a few
you are all 
am proud to be associated with all here
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/4/2005 6:31:46 PM | hey devil I loved the poem. Been a long time since I wrote poetry. The last one I wrote was for a little girl that had been killed across the street from my brother. She was 14 months old at the time. The lady I was going with at the time wanted to do a memorial page for her. She and I worked on it for about a week and then she went looking for a poem to use on the page. She told me she needed one that she could get permission to use online. Well I told her to give me a day or so and I would find a poem for her. The next morning I contacted her and then downloaded it to her. After about an hour of her telling me she couldn't use it since the authors name wasn't on it I finally told her not to worry she would never be messed with about using it. I finally told her I had written it. I had not wanted my name on it but when she found out it was by me she made sure my name was on it to show. It was called "On The Wings of Angels. Never wrote anything like it since or before. I knew the little girl from where she had been over to my brothers house with my niece. Mace and I were the only ones that the babies mother would allow to do the memorial page. Several had tried and she had the people at yahoo have theirs removed.
Mound | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/4/2005 7:19:03 PM | @ Mound, that was very sweet of you to do that. I'm sure it was a beautiful poem
and the mother was proud. I messed around with poetry a little as a young girl, but
never really got into it until my brothers death, since then they have come flowing out.
I have had alot of inspiration from my brother and the friend that I met online. And it
all comes from the heart. It is easier to write one for someone you know, I think this
gives it more meaning, I have tinkered around with other things(like my profile), but nothing has the meaning that the ones for my brother and friend do. Any chance that you could
share this poem with us ? Sure everyone here would enjoy it. Thanks for you support, your
a sweetie...... | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/4/2005 9:08:43 PM | devil I am not sure if I still have the words here or not. When I wrote it I never figured to use it again and I just wrote it online to mace in her email. I will check and see if she would happen to still have it. She loved it and asked if she could keep a copy. I will check with her.
Mound | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/4/2005 11:56:41 PM | | thanks mound would like to read it, will keep a eye open for it. | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/5/2005 1:17:53 AM | At this very moment after reading this thread I cannot find voice to speak the words I feel. Strangers we are yet a common ground of losing a loved one. We can't speak for how everyone feels yet in a combined group we all feel the pain we each have suffered.
I thank you all for sharing a part of your life that I do know is not easy. Mothers Day is coming up and it brings a lot of memories that are painful. My mother was an awesome lady. She loved her family and adored her friends. She was one not to just say I love you but to show it in every way possible. She was truly a joyous person and just to be in her presence made you feel alive. I loved her smile, her zest for life. the softeness in her voice, her loving ways, that wonderful smell she had about her, and her gentle touch. I can only hope her charm and grace spilled over into me.
Dec. 3, 1984, she had spent the day with me christmas shopping. We both took off work to have some shopping time together. I will never forget the joy , the laughter, the smiles, and the heartfelt moments we shared that day. I am grateful that before she drove off the last words we said to one another were "I love you". Mom never made it home. She was killed by a drunk driver at 8:03pm. Broken into pieces was her once beautiful body. Her outer beauty shattered in a split second. To see someone you love lying on a silver slab, broken and mangled leaves a harsh lasting impression.
We will never see her smile, hear her laughter, or embrace her with a hug. My comfort comes in knowing I will see her again one day. Shes an angel now, glowing with all her beauty. Like some of you, I do talk to her a lot. I know she cannot answer me, yet it gives me peace and helps me to live without her here in my life. We all grieve in our own way. Different yet similar.
My heart is with you all in your loss. I appreciate this thread. It has shown me that I am not alone in my feelings. We are all strangers yet united here in this thread. Thank you.
Sandi | |
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| support in grieving
Posted: 5/5/2005 2:23:56 AM | | My dad died 3 years ago this September 10th. Every september I find I get a bit melancholy, and what pulls me out of it is the memories. He may have died, but his memory lives on - the good and bad, and he lives in me and in my daughter. I typically go to church and just light a candle and pray. That helps me. | |
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