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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 6/29/2007 1:09:14 PM | | I dont think PEOPLE know where their fit is in general. for those of us in todays dating market a womans 'place' (I believe you're referring to) is well understood. Communication isn't as difficult as one would think. So i would have to disagree somewhat. I believe that the problem is that people don't seem to think of their relationship as a partnership... A life partnership. Just my 2 cents. | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 6/29/2007 1:14:08 PM | | Ohmygosh, please read what is going on in the WORLD with women...expectations, rights, what is going on in their lives...even reading just gives us a glimpse of the picture, and it is not pretty. Women need to continue to support one another. I think the feminist movement, equal rights, and birth control are some of the best things that have happened for women, and these are not available/present in many areas of the world. | |
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| Who put what where which is today!?
Posted: 6/29/2007 1:59:20 PM | queennotprincess - women by nature are not abandoners. Males in their pathological attempt to find 'greener grass', 'evade child support' and 'evade dutiful support of wife and child' and 'evade provision for their wife and their children'....
So as a result, the 'seeking greener grass' pathological males all became polyamorous..
It is women -- not men -- that are pushing men into non-mongamous relationshps. Mainly because women do not want men to share life with. They want men who do "what the woman wants" or to be some unrealistic verson of what a man/husband is. The younger women especially have such a selfish, evil, and anti-male belief system that I fear for what the face of our society is going to be 20 years from now.
A lot of men have several women on the go because those women are friends, and men have learned that you only get love in the form of scraps -- take what you can get, because its not enough to live off of in one relationship alone. I know men who are basically latchkey boyfriends. The woman dates them a couple times of the month when they want sex, groceries, baby sitter, etc -- but otherwsie they sit around man bashing when they think we cannot hear.
Women as a rule do not abandon wonderful loving supportive faithful husbands.
Wow. You could not be more wrong. You sound like you are in love with your own anger. Thats a common social disease in America -- ignorance.
I dont think any man begrudes women equal rights. But I think now that women have equality in North America -- they don't know how to steer the ship. Too many are still stuck in the old mindset of "blame men", and not enough have clued to the fact that men are fed up with the BS coming out of what women define as ideal families.
I think most men just see the new world as having no positive or leadership role for men anymore.
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| Who put what where which is today!?
Posted: 6/29/2007 9:47:27 PM | The top 3 listed grounds for divorce in USA are 1. lack of financial support, 2. adultery, or 3. abuse/mistreatment and children issues.
Too many are still stuck in the old mindset of "blame men", and not enough have clued to the fact that men are fed up with the BS coming out of what women define as ideal families.
Yeah, I just loved all the stuff from the "princess" myself, BB. I read all that and I just had to think to myself, who on earth would want to date someone with such a negative attitude towards the opposite gender??? I mean, really! (Oh, wait, I *know* the answer to that... anyone who wants to put up with constantly being berated for everything, but puts up with it for... sex. Exactly the type of guy she disdains so blatantly).
Lets see, I've been cheated on by a woman where I paid the mortgage, all the bills, maintained the house and yard, while she... shopped on QVC, played games on her computer, and wanted a bigger house (that I couldn't afford alone, but suggesting "we" could buy something bigger, *together*, got me emotionlessly tossed aside for a guy with more money. Oh yeah, I never cheated, never hit her, and was doing all I could to "financially support her" - oh, wait, the "princess" says women never leave guys like that.
(Oh, and let me add, he cheated on her less than a year later, she hasn't had longer than a 6mo relationship since, is bitter and disdains men to this day, except me who she claims to be "the only man she's ever loved and who has ever really loved her". Go figure.)
Still have another one that calls me up trying to guilt me into helping her financially, with the kid she had by some jobless loser thats in jail last I heard. Hmm... I have a stable job, own a house free and clear, paid for everything... but running from state to state with the jobless guy to stay ahead of the multiple arrest warrants was just so much more *exciting*!!!
Do I think women are evil? Of course not. But I've dated the gamut from ones that run back to their ex's "for the kids" (and plan on leaving "a**hole" when the kids turn 18), ones that don't know the meaning of "compromise" ("my way or the highway")... and yeah, some really wonderful women too. Yeah, I've never cheated, never hit a woman, and do what I can financially (money doesn't grow on trees!)... and no, the women I've dated have been *my* choices to date, I share *equal* blame for how/why they ended.
I think these women who marry guys who wind up cheating on them, abusing them, or aren't financially stable/supportive, should really take their time to look at *their* part in the relationships, and *their* choices, rather than sitting there trying to "blame men" for their woes. The more you focus on the *negative*, the more you'll see things negatively. "Expect the worst, and you'll never be disappointed."
Unfortunately, we live in a society where people don't want to be responsible for their own actions. Heck, she spilled hot McD's coffee in her lap... is it *her* fault? No! Sue! Its their (his/her) fault for not "warning me" I was playing with something hot (fire)! | |
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007000
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Joined: 6/18/2007
Msg: 201 | |
| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 6/30/2007 1:15:26 AM | | I don't feel this way! I don't like spiders and If I can't open a jar then you can bet I will ask him. I don't need him to open the door for me, although it can make me feel appreciated. Many of the things you have written, I can do for myself. The men in my life never wanted to do any of these things for me anyway. Most of them were downright lazy, full of themselves and wanted no responsibility whatsoever. Why should I act any different than I do now? If I seem cold and bitter about this subject than I'm truely sorry, I seldom found any of these kindnesses from men. I saw other women being treated nice sometimes. I know that men can be nice if they want to be. | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/3/2007 1:19:18 PM | | I agree Chelynne! Im tired of being independent, I want a hero! I have never wanted to burn my bra in protest.I have worked since I was 16, I have been a single mom for 16 yrs.When I was young I always pictured being the happy housewife, raise the kids and stay at home.....didn't happen,lol. | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/24/2007 9:48:57 PM | Regarding this statement:
Women want the best of both worlds. They want the gains realized through the feminist movement/struggle, and the chivalry/gallanatry of the by gone eras. They want their cake,they want to eat it, and they want the man to bake it, serve them , and clean up the dishes.
I ve never heard so much bullshit in my entire life. This is what men want: They want the female to be old fashion, subservient and do whatever the hell they want, but they also want them to work full time and bring home the money and then they can sit on their lazy assess all evening long. You cant have it both ways.
If i work 12-14 hours a day i would have no time to cater to a mans need. He has to take care of himself . Yes i am sure many women will attack me on this. Too bad. Maybe you can do it, but i cant. I dont proclaim to be a superwoman. I like to have a life for myself too, meaning i can do the things i like to do. When i am happy i can make the other person in my life happy. | |
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mika k
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Joined: 7/16/2007
Msg: 205 | |
| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/24/2007 10:46:01 PM | Feminism started because women wanted the choice about whether or not to go out to work ,stay home and be a housewife or just never get married at all. Now you can not find a man who wants his wife to be a housewife. He expects her to get out there and work 9 to 5 too so they can have two cars , big house a computer for everyone in the family along with a tv and cd player in every kids room , ipods and every other electric gadget going.
This is why both must work now otherwise they would not be able to afford all the cool electronic gadgets they want and fees for having kids in every sport and activity they want . I would love to be a house wife . It feels natural to me and i do it well , but as i said men like that don't exist anymore ,and if they do they are buying brides from Russia or the philippines .They wont even bother to look here . | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/25/2007 12:33:33 AM | I still don't know a woman who is willing to kill a spider or a roach if there's a man within screamin distance. I actually had to drive an hour to my girlfriend's house once because she saw a mouse in her apartment, and she didn't have the heart to kill it or set traps. I also ended up changing light bulbs and fixin the kitchen sink sprayer. I loved every minute of it... I might not be the best lookin or the richest man on earth, but d*mn it, I'm handy. I love it when a woman accepts what I have to offer.
Excellent point, about men expecting women to work.
Bear with me, because I'd love your thoughts on this. I daydreamed this in economics once... we were talking about the fact that there's only so much money allowed in the economy at once, to keep inflation low. So I thought, when the job markets opened to women and minorities, there wasn't really that much more money to go around. I think that caused everyone's earning potential to go down. It now takes more people to make the same amount of money (real value, adjusted for inflation).
At the same time, our standard of living keeps going up because the richest 10% set the trends, expectations, and most of all the prices. So if you WANT an unnecessarily big house, two brand new SUV's, a boat, and a vacation house, you pretty much have to have two people working here in the real world.
I'm all for women doing whatever the h*ll they want to, but I'd rather have someone I live with raisin the hypothetical kids... that's motivation enough for me to work harder. If I can't have a motorcycle, well, at least my kids will be taken care of.
***I had to edit this post... originally I said c*ckroach but POF is offended by the term c*ck. Like, I have to refer to the faucet outside as "the faucet outside," not the sillc*ck. Or, I can't say, "the puppy looked at me quizzically, c*cking its head to the left." | |
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| Who put what where which is today!?
Posted: 7/25/2007 1:41:10 AM | queennotprincess,
As usual your one sidedness on the issue is always the mans fault in many of your posts. Anyone who has "Empowerment" mentioned four times in only two sentences shouts feminist way too loudly. Even the way your talking could be considered an insult to a true feminist as its suppose to be based on equality, NOT based on gender.
Males in their pathological attempt to find 'greener grass', 'evade child support' and 'evade dutiful support of wife and child' and 'evade provision for their wife and their children' , as their 'husbandly duty', (look up definition of husbandry), have abandoned 62 million women w/children, in USA who live, census 2000, as single parent mothers, heads of household in USA, living below the poverty level.
Since women are initiating 70 - 75% of all divorces, probably has something to do the 62 million women as single mothers don't you think? Not necessarily being abandoned.
Women as a rule do not abandon wonderful loving supportive faithful husbands.
Yeah, right. Tell that to me & my dad. Both of us had unfaithful wifes. Cheating is now becoming almost equal between men & women now.
Ever see "Snapped" on the Oxygen channel? Pretty scary huh.
Yeah, blah, blah men cause most domestic violence, but women doing it are on the rise more then ever now, and not just due to us "bad" men aether. | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/25/2007 3:20:20 AM | | Seeing as women have been more than 50% of the voters for way over half a century, they have only themselves to blame if they haven't gotten together to change things they don't like. So the answer to the OP is a resounding yes. | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/25/2007 3:35:52 AM | | Chelynne has hit the nail squarely on the head! Women want to act like the 'guys' of the 70's fine. There is usually a price to e paid for everything. | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/25/2007 4:11:43 AM | I think Both sexes are responsible to a degree.
<div class="quote"> Women today want to be let on the same playing field with the Big Boys, but they don't want to have to play Hard Ball. ..
This is a very common thought put forth by men. Maybe its not that they want to be- but they had to play hard ball to survive and don’t like having to do so.
What caused the women to make this change? Could it be because their NEEDS were not being met? Could it be that what they need most is not being provided from the men ?
It is interesting that some women were pushed to a point where they said “ I’m tired of being played I want to PUT my life IN MY hands and be in control”.
A lot of women want to feel secure- and if the guys that surrounded them aren’t stepping up to the plate, the women have to create it themselves. A lot of women have adapted, and it seems the men are experiencing a little lag time to catch up. OR they are resist adapting to the changes.
So if women want to feel secure- why aren’t the guys providing a sense of security (Not just financial- but emotional, and for a future family). If a woman is going to invest time in raising children, chances are she wants a partner to do the same.
I think they still want to have the ‘feeling of safety and being protected’, but are very careful as to who it is they allow into their life. If they had to create a sense of security and safety for themselves, they are going to be careful so as not to let anyone destroy that- so they are more selective or ‘picky’ as to whom they let enter their life.
Are a lot of the men that are complaining about not belonging or fitting anywhere in a woman’s life- don’t see how they instigated the change or ‘evolution’ in the identity of these women, and refuse to evolve to adapt to what they affected to change.
When things begin to change, there is usually a time of ‘feeling lost and out of place’ involved . The women who first began to step up to the plate had to go through the same thing as they forged new territory into self reliance and independence would have definitely experienced that- as well as being chastised by society.
Now, these men that feel LOST, are finding that their old behaviors do not fit in many places in society, and they resist. Just step up and adapt.
Placing blame is fruitless.
It is the evolution of behavior right in our faces. Things have changed and will continue to do so. We all have to adapt to our circumstances if we want to survive. Survival of the fittest, is survival of the most adept to adapt. Think about it.
Q | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/25/2007 4:14:25 AM | yes...women are more independent than ever before, but that doesn't mean one can't ask for help with something. I certainly am thankful I wasn't born way back when in a time when women really had no rights or independence. There were no choices...is that what you'd like to go back to?
P.S. I don't see anything wrong with opening a door for a woman, or man for that matter...I see it as manners | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/25/2007 10:37:45 AM | | Questamaya, if anything, it seems the women are the ones not adapting to the new role they have forged for themselves. Some women claim how they are independent, they don't need a man, they want one. Yet, they cling to the old ways of chivalry & the like. Men are now being born into this societies new beliefs, not the ones who instigated the change of the past. Thats how they are adapting so well, they never HAD to change. At least not nearly as much. | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/25/2007 10:57:51 AM | I agree up to a point. The hunter vs. gatherer roles of men slaying dragons and maidens in distress left behind is a lovely historical notion that doesn't hold water when a person's thinks of life in the past realistically.
During WWII it was the women in Canada who kept the factories running with munitions etc. for the men at war. And many, such as my late 'aunt' enjoyed the sense of accomplishment and the skills she acquired. She went on to spend her career as a quality control inspector and a member of the Steelworkers union.
I know another woman my age whose aunt was a capable hard news reporter at a major American newspaper all her life. And I'm sure the list of women even in the last century just goes on and on.
Although in some ways I wish I had married the man I was being groomed from childhood to wed and went on to the lifestyle of a traditional stay-at-home wife, I'm old enough now to know that days gone by were not all they were cracked up to be.
The bulk of our country was populated by people who came over on ships to be brides or were starving. They sent the criminals too. I don't think it was always just a case of simply killing spiders and in Canada we aren't allowed to carry guns for protection. | |
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| Women put women where we are today!?
Posted: 7/25/2007 11:16:09 AM | I have to agree, cooldude. It really just annoys the p*ss outta me when a woman can't shut up about how she's makin it on her own and doesn't need a man, yet remains bitter about how one or two men have treated her. If she's that highly evolved, modern, and independant, why does it matter how other people treat her? She's makin it. Same goes for men and their "I'm just gonna use em like they use me" bitterness.
Although I do believe, if these militant feminists have their way, men will be moved to sperm farms and be put out to stud if they have good genes. Doesn't sound like that bad of a life. Problem is, pickle jars would remain forever closed and everything on the top shelf would just have to stay there. 
And one thing... it's husbandLY, not husbandRY. This oughta boil your blood:
husband, n. (AS. husbonda; hus, house, and bonda, master, head of a family, married man)
1. the male head of a household; one who directs the economy of a family. (Obs.)
2. a tiller of the ground (Obs.)
3. a man joined to a woman by marriage, the correlative of wife.
4. a manager, as of a household. (Archaic)
5. A male animal kept for breeding purposes. (Rare)
Husbandry, n. 1. originally, management of domestic affairs, resources, etc.
2. Frugality; good management; thrift.
3. Farming.
All it says for wife was something about being married, and every word with "wife" as its root just refers back to the definition of wife.... ex. housewife... a married woman who stays home. Granted, this dictionary is from 1987, but it's still funny. | |
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