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| women who only want men with kids
Posted: 8/24/2007 9:12:48 AM | my two cents..
okay fulltime parents are "geared" a little different, reason I used the term "fulltime parents " and not parents is because some parents hardly ever see their kids or spend time with them.
being a fulltime parent has lots of challenges in the "dating" world, plans get changed last minute, relaxing time may only be when they are sleeping (..lol) and lots of stress and then throw in that maybe the lil ones aren't wanting to see mom/dad seeing someone (that is a whole thread in itself).
So
People in the same situation maybe more understanding. Last thing one needs is someone "flipping" about cancelling a date or a get together because the parent was needed else where last minute. They (people with kids) are seem to be a little more understanding (non judgmental) and tolerant of things. Kids teach parents to share, patience, responsibility , balance where our time needs to be focused and what truly matters in life.
Now
A lot of people will say "well I understand and see that"... as the saying goes "easy to talk the talk, but can one walk the walk".
Then throw in a "difficult" child , one who rebels authority, has an affinity for trouble and your "dating life" is almost non existent. So the last thing the parent is looking for is “more” stress in their life. Sometimes it is just easier to say “ I have no time for this” then to deal with the “frustrations”.
I am just trying to give some insight here as to why people see things they way they do. This does not categorize people or say that people without children don’t understand. I know of some who do.
But as I said, this is just my 2 cents.. | |
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| women who only want men with kids
Posted: 8/24/2007 2:08:31 PM | | i would think that it would be MORE difficult to coordinate time together with two single parents....twice as many kids & issues to get in the way, no? | |
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| women who only want men with kids
Posted: 8/24/2007 4:13:29 PM | well that would depend if you are looking for convince or substance..
though they can be the same thing they can also be completely different. | |
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| women who only want men with kids
Posted: 8/24/2007 5:51:29 PM |
okay fulltime parents are "geared" a little different, reason I used the term "fulltime parents " and not parents is because some parents hardly ever see their kids or spend time with them.
What is the minimum requirement for a "full-time parent"? Is there a certain percentage of time needed to qualify?
Last thing one needs is someone "flipping" about cancelling a date or a get together because the parent was needed else where last minute.
And this would be different from a single person who might have a job where they are on call (such as a nurse, firefighter, etc)?
I know you're right... that's how most people defend that position. I just see a lot of problems when people make the assumptions that you are referring to, though it's certainly not my place to say they're wrong. | |
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| women who only want men with kids
Posted: 8/24/2007 6:47:15 PM | I really have not came across a single profile stating that....most women my age are near or done the parenting (not that you are ever done )
I read the whole thread threw ,,and ,,well , find someone that is on the "same page" as you and ya got a match ..
On the off topic here,,,I dated a girl from Calgary for a bit ...followed the rule DO NOT INTRODUCE TO KIDS ,,,,my daughter never seen this girl or met her ,,,,yet she developed a resentment/dislike for her ,,,I do not know ,,,,,think just have to play by what feels right for each individual situtation..have to be able to adjust.. | |
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| women who only want men with kids
Posted: 7/30/2008 9:00:55 PM | | I can only speak for myself as a single father. I know that I would prefer to date someone a couple of times or even a few before introducing myself to her kids or to my son. I would want to know if we were compatible and had a good chance of staying together. Kids do take work especially someone elses. I have dated someone with kids and I enjoyed taking them to go skating with my son. We ended up breaking up because of commitments that I had made with my son as I had him on a hockey team that required that I travel every weekend over the winter. So she was upset that I couldn't make the time for her every weekend. We lived 2 hours away from each other. We make commitments for our kids and we don't have as much free time as we would like. Other similiar minded parents understand some of that time commitment that we put into sending our kids to sports or camps or waiting and watching during a ball tournament. Driving 2 hours away for a game and driving home. I know for my son he did better in school and got into less trouble as soon as I started doing that for him. There are all sorts of different parents. You still have to find someone compatible to each others lifestyle. | |
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