Tirkus
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Joined: 10/19/2006
Msg: 51 | |
| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/5/2007 9:13:39 PM |
Even drunken, smelly 'homeless people' occasionally get-it-on out there in the woods.
Funny all the drunken smelly homeless people I've seen live in urine soaked alleys or Hamilton (a big urine soaked alley) | |
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| Aren't there some people whom poodle is attracted to?
Posted: 2/6/2007 7:45:46 AM | Hey, poodle, you're right to reject your friends' terrible advice. No one can predict when or how attraction will happen between two people. (or three! or nine!) I don't know you, but my WAG would be that you're nervous enough on these first dates of yours that attraction is difficult, to say the least. We generally don't feel like opening up to a stranger, or when we don't quite feel safe or comfortable.
That's why a first date should not be a sales call. There's no decision to make at the end of the evening, other than whether the time passed pleasantly. Attraction and connection grow over time as we get to know one another. That instant appeal your friends prefer is based on so much less than knowing one another. (And how many of those friends are divorced, unhappy, or alone, by the way?)
So, give yourself a break, already, and take whatever time you need to discover what and whom you like and want. Maybe even more than that, keep other people's advice at arm's length. (Except for mine, of course!) If anybody had THE answer, wouldn't there only be one book on the subject?
Cheers!
Vulf  | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/6/2007 8:12:04 AM | The answer is NO!!
Being attractive would mean both-- inside and out. We are all unique in our own way. Appriciate it.
Don't get carried away all, no point in posting comments on what you think of ONLY outer beauty is or thoughts of superfical appearances.
YOU are the ones supporting to the shallowness if you read this question and thought of only what you see and not what lies within.
HB | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/6/2007 9:08:46 AM | | It is a strange and wondeful universe full of diversity. Thee is indeed someone for everyone. Thos who fall outside the big boring bell curve of society's standards for what is attractive may not have the same statistical probability if having others finding them attractive...but that makes findng someone who digs you all the more special. Normallacy is a dictatorship of the mediocre. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/6/2007 12:11:28 PM | I'll wax optimistic for now and say that I'm sure everyone attracts someone.
there thats the best I can offer.
I used to watch Maury Povich after school in junior high and I was always amazed when he did his "total opposites" in love shows - you know the ones,the young hottie with the 100 year old man , the really short guy with the amazonian woman , etc etc.
there are some general ideas to what constitutes beauty/attractiveness but there are always exceptions to the rule too. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/11/2007 6:43:09 PM | If people say they don't go by looks they are lying. You are not going to talk to someone you don't find attractive looks are the first thing people see. Its sad to say and I have even said I don't go by looks first but honestly I do. I would prefer to say I like to find out whats inside first but it never really happens.
The guys that are good looking know it and they treat the women like crap, however the rest men are the ones that treat you like gold. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/11/2007 7:04:56 PM | People seem attracted to me at first, physically I guess....but when they really get to know me, they run off. I guess they don't like my personality.
I'm not a bad person...I'm nice as long as you're nice to me. I'm a good girlfriend... probably TOO good. one of my exes said I was everything he'd ever wanted but he wasn't happy with me. I'm quiet...I don't talk much...I'm kinda nervous... and nobody likes that. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/12/2007 12:44:10 PM | Aces, I agree with you 100%.
It seems that with all the media brainwashing going on in this day and age, everyone thinks they "deserve" this fantasy relationship with some cookie cutter movie actor/actress. The reality is that very few of us actually look this way, so most of these folks will end up unhappy.
We should not lower our standards and be Mother Theresa, we simply need to make our standards more realistic. Real life is not Hollywood. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/12/2007 2:21:16 PM |
People seem attracted to me at first, physically I guess....but when they really get to know me, they run off. I guess they don't like my personality.
I'm not a bad person...I'm nice as long as you're nice to me. I'm a good girlfriend... probably TOO good. one of my exes said I was everything he'd ever wanted but he wasn't happy with me. I'm quiet...I don't talk much...I'm kinda nervous... and nobody likes that.
You know, I can relate to you somewhat on this.
People seem to find me attractive physically....not saying they should..haha....but some do.
What I think happens, is they paint some sort of picture of how I am before they get to know me....and once they do....that's all she wrote.
I am by no means a bad person....I am kinda out there personalilty wise...meaning, I don't fall under a catagory really. Then again, who really does? To me, you just sound a bit shy...maybe just quiet by nature. That's no reason for ppl to run off though, in fact...you would think most ppl would like that.
But, people are funny.
Attraction for me works on a deeper level than just physical.....which is probably why I am still single now.  | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/12/2007 2:27:59 PM | A lot of studies have shown attraction to be pretty universal, as in symetrical faces, broad shoulders for men, small waists for women etc.
I agree...there is definately a sort of general consensus on what is beautiful....despite all the well meaning slogan's....."beauty is in the eye of the beholder" ....but most beholders agree on what is beautiful.
but I think everyone having a person in the world that will find them amazingly physically attractive is fairy tale bs. Thoughts?
Of course it is ....but even the least attractive people can find love....if they are realistic and look for deeper thing's than physical beauty.....the problem often might be when people expect/need too much physical attractiveness and don't even realize it. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/12/2007 2:51:08 PM | Yes, there are people to whom no one is attracted -- such people are unattractive because they're mean-spirited, narcissistic, boring punks. An ugly appearance doesn't obliterate a person's attractiveness the way an ugly spirit does. Believe me, I'm not Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm -- I just happen to think this is true.javascript:smilie(' ') | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/12/2007 5:31:11 PM | | My dad has always told me that there is a lid for every pot. I have seen some very unattractive people (by societies standards) find love - and they are very affectionate to each other so that implies physical attraction. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/16/2007 10:21:50 AM |
You know, I can relate to you somewhat on this.
People seem to find me attractive physically....not saying they should..haha....but some do.
What I think happens, is they paint some sort of picture of how I am before they get to know me....and once they do....that's all she wrote.
I am by no means a bad person....I am kinda out there personalilty wise...meaning, I don't fall under a catagory really. Then again, who really does? To me, you just sound a bit shy...maybe just quiet by nature. That's no reason for ppl to run off though, in fact...you would think most ppl would like that.
But, people are funny.
Attraction for me works on a deeper level than just physical.....which is probably why I am still single now.
Glad I'm not the only one, at least... maybe I'm just meeting all the wrong people...most people I date are outgoing and I'm completely fine with that but I guess outgoing people only like other outgoing people. I wish there were more introverts. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/16/2007 11:30:38 AM |
I wish there were more introverts
There are but there has to be a physical attraction as well. Plus the fact that you are evidently attracted to the more outgoing type will keep you from noticing the more introverted. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/16/2007 11:44:38 AM | I'll admit I allway's said I wan't to move to Europe one of these day's to get away from the damn 60% obesity rate to be around a higher number of datable people, plus, alot of people here mix soda with there alcohol, and drink wine out of a box, and wear polyester suits too big for them, if you know what I mean (if you don't I'm saying this is a piss classless place).
See? Class is a value of mine, as is intelligence, and toping the list outside the looks scale is niceness. My standards, otherwise are reasonable,they have to be of legal age and just have to be attracted to the person, and they lose points if they smoke, are mean, etc, so an "average" (since america has a high obesity rate think European average, or average in the sense of ideal weight, maybe 10 lbs over even if there average height) girl will have a MUCH better chance with me if she doesnt smoke and is nice as opposed to a supermodel who's mean and chain smokes camels all day. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/16/2007 11:52:17 AM |
People seem attracted to me at first, physically I guess....but when they really get to know me, they run off. I guess they don't like my personality.
I'm not a bad person...I'm nice as long as you're nice to me. I'm a good girlfriend... probably TOO good. one of my exes said I was everything he'd ever wanted but he wasn't happy with me. I'm quiet...I don't talk much...I'm kinda nervous... and nobody likes that
Oh, believe me, they ARE phyiscally attracted to you, your so CUTE :D Maybe your bossy and demanding and THAT'S why they ran off, I have a pretty and cute ex who wen't all the way to Barney's on Madison Ave just to shop (and that place aint cheap either!), yet I broke up with her for being way to bossy, I don't mind being submissive but I do have to draw a line somewhere, we're still on good terms (we hug from time to time when she's in town :) but if she toned down the bossy and controlingness we'd still be togeather.
But... you say you're quiet, maybe that's the problem part of my exe's charm was how much she talked, I LOVED hearing her talk about stuff, and to let you know it's kind-of a turn-on for us men if we can't get a word in :) when you speak is when you build attraction and convey your interest and what you want, be too quiet and you don't give away enough information. | |
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Smjle
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Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 71 | |
| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/16/2007 12:08:05 PM |
A lot of studies have shown attraction to be pretty universal, as in symmetrical faces, broad shoulders for men, small waists for women etc.
That's true. People may have certain preferences but everyone, even babies, are attracted to certain desirable characterizes like symmetry. You have heard of the bell curve. If you plot looks and desirability you get a bell curve.
This is how it is: 8s, 9s, and 10s are all in the high range of looks and desirability and almost everyone considers them desirable. Therefore, a 10 may accept an 8 because an 8 is attractive. As you go down the scale, it becomes more difficult. 5s know they can't get 8s but they want better than another 5. There are only a few 1s and 2s and they are unattractive to everyone. A 2 might accept a 3, if the three would accept them. However, a 2 is unlikely to accept another 2 and no one, not even another 1 is going to accept a 1. Fortunately 1s are rare, perhaps 1 in a 10,000. | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/16/2007 12:16:17 PM | Someone might convince themselves that their eyes are attractive and they might not be physically repulsive, but they're just not going to be beautiful or handsome in a physical way.
I don't think you're making alot of sense here. If they have nice eyes that right there puts them in the area of "attractive" it all starts with the eyes (physically speaking) so if they have that and a nice smile they ARE on the attractive side. I mean just ask most people and they would say that "it's the eyes" . Eyes are the window to the soul.
IF someone said something like....."My....you have beautiful looking feet" or "You have nice looking hands" I will admit that is not enough to be classified is attractive in a beautiful kind of way.
But when you say nice eyes , you are going right smack downtown to the beauty land, that is where it all starts. A person can be short, bald, whatever skin colour, overweight, underweigth, height (too tall ) or whatever, if they have nice eyes, they ARE classified as "good looking" because if the eyes have it, it really makes the whole appearance shine that much more.
No offence Op, but I think there is a touch of ignorance in that thought, because no one is truly ugly. I mean sure some areas as it relates to hygien may be troublesome, if they don't take care of it, but otherwise, NOONE is ugly in and of themselves (Physically speaking). | |
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| Aren't there some people that nobody is attracted to?
Posted: 2/16/2007 12:53:41 PM | would I want to spend time with this person if something were to happen to alter his physical appearance?
That is such an interesting question, and one that I have asked myself. Christopher and Dana Reeve were perfect examples of devotion and true love. That's what I strive for.
Unconditional acceptance. | |
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