| indian women
Posted: 8/10/2008 2:37:20 PM | | I have been reading some of your coments,and i have dated a couple of Indian women in the passed and again a lot of it is because of family and tradition that they don't date English men. The only Indian women that tend to date outside of there faith have either split from a marrige or they no longer apart of there family circle or wanting entry into this country! Please prove me wrong on this coment girls !But i must say that Indian ladies are KHUBSARATE(meaning beautiful)and since i have imbraced the culture i would like to apart of it more but find it hard to find ladies willing to trust a white English man cos they think ya after just one thing and its not many that do. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 8/10/2008 7:07:09 PM | | i am an indian woman I am divorced with a child . Most indian men i have met are not interested in going out with a woman who has a child and above all one who is self sufficient and independent. I am an engineer and make a great living so there you have it. I go out with men i find compatability unless they object to my having a child | |
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| indian women
Posted: 8/10/2008 7:56:32 PM | Personal preference. I find that I'm generally not too attracted to Indian women despite being (sort of) Indian myself.
I actually know some Indian girls that refuse to date people that aren't caucasian... I suppose you're just meeting the wrong ones. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 10/16/2008 10:15:35 PM | in response to northern lights message quoting and, i find, making some personal attacks at me without admitting to doing so (page 4 of those paying attention)
whoa. first off, i qualified all my statements with "my experience"...which is just that. from the indian men i have met, interacted with, seen, heard from, been personally involved with in some way, shape or form - these are the men i base my opinions on and from which i derive my sense of preference. regardless of how "western" i may have found an indian man, they still come with traditional families. i am not saying that ALL indian men are as i've described - just the ones i've had the misfortune to know.
i can understand why it might make you feel better to think of me as bigoted or racist or whatever it is you wish to call me. i get that. you feel personally attacked b/c you identify yourself as an indian man. but you are not one of the indian men i know.
i would ask you to take a moment to consider this - why are there so many documentaries, films, novels, plays, etc depicting the cultural prevalence of violence against women in indian society? why does indian culture still ascribe to a dowry system? why do we even have a moniker as the "burning brides" linked to our culture!?!!? why do we hear of honour killings in our culture? because it exists and it's widespread.
does that mean ALL indian men engage in such activity? of course not. but if i choose not to roll the dice and play in that pool, i'm labeled a racist. so be it. but i would ask you to consider the idea, the notion, that perhaps our cultural norms do play a part in how indian women are supposed to be seen by indian men. sometimes it is hard to overcome the nurture and environment you are brought up in - i'm not saying impossible to overcome but difficult. it is easier to go with the status quo.
btw, my experience is related to a fairly conservative population of indians in the lower mainland of bc. i hear that the indian populations in, say, toronto and montreal are much more liberal but i don't know b/c i haven't met indian families from those cities. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 10/16/2008 11:10:54 PM | | I love Indian woman, I've always been attracted to unconventional beauty. It's a shame they for the large part arn't aloud to like Westerners due to their traditions and religion. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 10/17/2008 1:46:55 AM | | Maybe not too many white guys are attracted to indian women? | |
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| indian women
Posted: 10/18/2008 11:35:09 AM | I am the result of a black person falling in love with an Asian Indian man. The idea that black features don't look attractive to an Asian Indian is a fallacy, just because I'm here right now typing to you.
But [personally, I probably would never date another Indian, not because I don't like my own people, just because my values as an American are different than traditionally Asian Indian values. Many Asian Indians are collectivists, I am an individualist. I'm sort of a rebel, Asian Indian society is very conformist. Asian Indian culture tends to prefer order. I tend to prefer a bit of chaos and adventure (But not as much as most of my American friends). Many Indians are passive, especially women. I'm VERY assertive.
Pretty much, think of your stereotypical leather jacket, black jeans, black t-shirt and black boot wearing bad boy with a heart of gold trying to make peace with the society he rebelled against for so long and you have me right there. A person like me would NOT fit in well in Indian society.
So in all likelihood, I wouldn't date another Indian, not because I'm racist (I can't be racist against Indians. I love my grandfather too much), but just because I know our cultures are totally different and we'll always be in conflict. (Sort of like the conflict I have with my Grandfather). | |
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| indian women
Posted: 10/18/2008 3:18:55 PM | | I have known two Indian women and both were married to Indian men. I always felt that Indian men are controlling and demanding....therefore the g/f/wife follow him...never walk in front of him but behind him . The men appear to be somewhat of a Master. One of these women were getting beatings regularly by her Indian husband and I intervened as I think this is uncalled for. The police hauled him off and made him stay away from the dwelling for up to 2 weeks...needless to say she took him back and I always noticed that she wore long sleeves in the dead of summer too....guessing it was to hide the bruises. Maybe this is common ...not sure but I don't want to find out either. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 2/9/2009 6:50:01 PM | | Well I'm Indian and I think part of the reason why some Indian women may be hesitant is because they're afraid of what their families may think. I personally, have dated many non-Indians and have had some great experiences with them, but sometimes people just prefer to date someone from their own culture. I mean, if you're interested in a particular Indian woman just ask them :) | |
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| indian women
Posted: 2/9/2009 6:54:59 PM | | By the way, I think a lot of people are making very broad generalizations about Indian people. Not every Indian person's views are the same; yes there are some largely held beliefs and traditions, but not everyone follows them including me. Everyone has their own experiences with Indian people or whatever, but an Indian woman or any woman's decision to not date a particular person, may not have anything to do with their background/culture, but perhaps the particular individual. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 9/8/2009 1:18:25 AM |
Anywhere you have a man thinking "our women" (of any race at all), you have the greatest level of sexist hypocrisy.
Men of every race think like this. As do women of every race. You've never seen an indian or black women say that "white women are taking our men". Seriously? | |
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| indian women
Posted: 9/8/2009 1:18:38 PM |
I love Indian woman, I've always been attracted to unconventional beauty. It's a shame they for the large part arn't aloud to like Westerners due to their traditions and religion.
Most people prefer their own race. The number of interracial relationships are exaggerated. Indian men/white women is a bit more common though but in general men are more open to dating outside their race. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 9/8/2009 2:54:40 PM | I am Indian(Apache..Turk "Gypsy'...and Kongo .. so 3 races(several ethnicities)..who kn0ws?..maybe 4..
I date all sorts of men...even green ones..
and there are wonderful men in all races..and ethnicities..
T | |
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| indian women
Posted: 9/8/2009 6:06:02 PM | The love of my life in college was a beautiful Indian woman.
I wish that I had married her.
She was wonderful, spiritual, smart, sweet.
Ouch.
I'm sure that our respective skin colors was never a remote consideration.
It might be however, that you're trying to date a deeply religious Hindu.... | |
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| indian women
Posted: 9/8/2009 6:54:47 PM | I dated one for several years,  Fantastic woman but with a completely obnoxious kid  | |
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| indian women
Posted: 9/9/2009 9:53:41 PM | I see a bit of this now that I am living around my father's side of the family, which are Afghan. I just had a conversation with one female cousin of mine who is 20 years old and tells me she must, as a girl, marry another Muslim, and he has to be Afghan, or it brings shame to the family or something like that.
My mom was American and my dad married her and it didn't work well for them, as the cultural differences between how Americans are individualists and Muslim culture tends to be more collective just doesn't jel well. I sided with my mom on all counts as I was born and raised here. I also turned agnostic because I didn't want religion telling me what kind of person I am. If I become spiritual someday, that's my personal journey to make.
I can tell I have very Americanized views because I don't want to do things that will affect me every day for the sake of some "family" or family members. I feel that is selfish on their part, but then again, that is the different cultures speaking. I would think it is selfish cause I lived with my mom (after they divorced) for 20 years and learned if you want to succeed, you go out there (on your own) and you work hard for it. The reward is the success, and if you are lucky, you may find love as well with it. But don't expect that. Very diferent view to a Muslim way of thinking which would say your success is the family's success and they will ensure you have a mate for life. That's why I feel it's very unfair at times for other cultures to keep instilling their culture on someone who is raised here with this culture. But again, that's just my personal opinion.
I also have found I tend to always shoot for or want to date anyone except a Muslim type man. Not purposefully trying to do so, but someone pointed out once, "all your boyfriends have been blond, what is up with that?" LOL Well, they all haven't been, but I definitely considered that maybe seeing a muslim man psychologically makes me think of my traumatic past with my father and how I don't want to be anywhere near that way of thinking or constrictivenesss.
I am curious if anyone else on here is from Arab-American parents like that and had these same culture challenges? It would be interesting to hear! And please note, above I was being totally honest, and mean no disrespect. In fact, I hope this helps enlighten me and help me change for the future. It's always good to confront your problems sometimes.
M | |
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| indian women
Posted: 9/10/2009 9:13:33 AM |
I am curious if anyone else on here is from Arab-American parents like that and had these same culture challenges? It would be interesting to hear! And please note, above I was being totally honest, and mean no disrespect. In fact, I hope this helps enlighten me and help me change for the future. It's always good to confront your problems sometimes.
I know of muslim women who have dated outside their race. I would think that most muslim parents would object more to dating a south asian hindus or sikhs? | |
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| indian women
Posted: 11/3/2009 1:01:48 AM | I don't think it has as much to do with their families as much as it has to do with Indian women themselves.
I have many Indian women friends whose family would be happy if they married someone white or Indian that really cared for them but the women themselves have reservations and here are some reasons why.
1. For most part, Indian men seem more predictable to many of these women and there is a comfort in familiarity.
2. As much as Indian society does treat women as a secondary citizen compared to a man but the same society has much clearer rules when it comes to dating and relationships thus making it lot more easier for a woman to tranverse that territory.
3. Most Indian women are looking for marriage and they don't want to spend years with a non-indian only to figure out at the end of it,he is not looking to get married.I am not saying Indian men would not break up with you but men that sleep with a women and don't marry her are not looked upon with a lot of respect by their own family in an Indian society.
If a man were living in with a woman and if he decided to break up with her bcoz she wanted marriage and he did not,most Parents would think twice about marrying their daughter off to a man like that. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 11/6/2009 4:16:42 PM | | It just depends where you live i guess, When I lived in chicago , I met this inian girl at a piano bar, She was the prettiest girl i have ever seen, She was with her brother and one of his friends, They were both douche bags! Any way, I ended up talking to her and bought her a couple drinks b4 i knew it we were on the way back to her place, she left her brother and his friend there with no ride, and well u can guess the reast. So All people are different. This is almost 2010. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 11/6/2009 5:54:34 PM | I would date an Indian woman just like any other race. As long as they have the same qualities I look for in any race (especially religion) I'm down for it.  | |
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| indian women
Posted: 11/6/2009 6:10:04 PM | For those people that choose not to date the opposite sex within their race because of cultural norms...you have clearly made your point about not favoring certain things about your culture. So why would they not think that there are people of the opposite sex that think the same way about the culture?
Some random Indian woman might go "I don't date Indian guys because they're too blah blah etc." I am referring to the type of Indian woman that is very "westernized". So it's not a stretch to say there's an Indian man that is also westernized and rebels against the cultural traits that the woman looks down upon. So that's what I have to say about that. Do not give up on your whole race, because not all of them follow the culture to the same extent. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 11/6/2009 6:10:47 PM | I can only talk about my own personal experiences, but perhaps this'll lend some perspective.
Despite having been born and raised in India, I have had very little success dating Indian women. Okay, I've had little success in general (as anyone can glean from my posting history), but I can only describe my dating experiences with Indian women as worse than average, which is a shame, because I tend to be physically attracted to them the most. (Big surprise there, eh?)
As many others have pointed out, the main challenges have to do with differences in culture and the fact that many Indians, males as well as females, tend to have strongly traditional / religious beliefs and are often socially conservative, and I don't fit into either mould. It cuts both ways, of course--many of the women I dated wanted to talk about marriage after the first few dates, and I promptly bailed--I don't mind talking about it in the abstract, but dating with the intention of getting married is a no go as far as I'm concerned. And I need to sleep with a woman and spend a lot of time getting to know her before I'll even consider long-term commitment, let alone marriage. | |
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| indian women
Posted: 11/8/2009 7:04:01 AM | | I have been married to a native lady for 11 years and it's just what they want at the time, and I am a black man! Now she with a mexican, and before that a jamacan and many more races in two years after our divorce. So, it just depends on what she goes though in time. Indian ladies in Arizona are beautiful, 85% here! And watch the alcohol consumption too, jackle and hyde sometimes! | |
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| indian women
Posted: 11/8/2009 6:25:20 PM | YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT NATIVE AMERICANS YOU JACKASS
THE THREAD IS ABOUT WOMEN FROM A COUNTRY CALLED INDIA ON A CONTINENT CALLED ASIA
SHEESH, ARE YOU RETARTED OR PERMANENTLY MENTALLY UNDERQUALIFIED ???? PROLLY BOTH.......
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| indian women
Posted: 11/8/2009 6:28:35 PM | find someone who grew up in america / canada / uk and preferably one that has at least one non-indian / non-south asian parent.
i myself was adopted : and though i'm 100 % indian BIOLOGICALLY, am american emotionally & psychologically..........
try searching online for "india adoptees"....theres thousands of us in the US alone......and you'll have the physical atttribues you desire w/ the emotional / mental outlook that an american would have
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