| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/18/2008 8:07:46 PM | Hahaha...I have that quote from "Fatal Attraction" stuck in my head where the female character tells the married man, "I won't be ignored!" LOL
But seriously, show how you feel guys...don't ignore us...that is just plain ridiculous. | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/18/2008 8:22:35 PM | I am sitting here thinking of all the guys who have ignored me were ACTUALLY interested...mmmm things are never what they seem huh?
I will tell you this.. a girl can be driven to distraction by a man who doesn't call after a great date wondering if he likes them... but you know what I think it backfires because it doesn't give her a chance to figure out if she was truly interested in you or the pursuit...
After a few times of wondering about a guy I'm likely to not allow myself to care about the next one who does it...
But here again thinking of " THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS" | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/18/2008 9:52:38 PM | I can say they absolutely do not like being ignored..Neither do men. I know because I was a professional ignorer. People must understand though sometimes there is a very good reason for the ignoring. Mine was that though I loved my girlfriend greatly I just didn't want to be around her . She was very controlling and just plain mean most of the time. Cutting down this person or that person, bickering about what to watch on TV or what game to play. Complete opposites we were. She was the sort of person who blocked certain channels for fear I might see someone else's breasts or a South Park cartoon which she watched with me at one time but soon after hated it (it offended her but so didnt everything once she got baptized, she was Wiccan..I can do without the Cartoon, I am just making a point) or complain for half an hour because I struck up a short conversation with the checkout girl while she was totaling up my groceries. I would sit in my living room on my PC or watch TV and she would sit in the bedroom and watch TV or play on her laptop, for years. I would still take her out for a movie or dinner among other things and even then she was very rude to people at times. Like once I took her out for a steak and when we sat down the table was still wet. She freaked out on our waitress and refused to let me leave a tip. Sorry , but I left one anyhow and I herd about it for days. Once we were at a bar and I saw an old female friend (whom I was never intimate with), she gave me a hug and my girlfriend yelled at her "Don't hug him". I was mortified and insisted she apologize. It was a nightmare if I ran into an X...if I introduced them she would say "I don't want to meet your X sluts" and if I didn't she would **** at me for not introducing them. I just couldn't win. We split up for almost a year once about halfway through the 11 years and I dated several good women. I might have spent 3 hours a week on the PC during that time. They were nice women but I eventually took the X back and that was that. Back to isolating. It was a never-ending circle of craziness. I would say "Ill pay more attention to you if you weren't so nasty" and she would say "Id be a lot nicer if you didn't ignore me"
After 11 years its over. About 2 months ago we got a marriage license and within 2 weeks she didn't come home from work one morning (3rd shifter) and I was worried sick about her because she said some guy was coming to her work at lunch and sometimes her breaks who gave her the creeps. By the evening I was on the phone to the police. I called earlier but they said for me to give things a few more hours. A few hours later she called me and said a male co-worker took her home "if you know what I mean" and we need to go our separate ways. I was very hurt but I'm starting to move on now. What makes it worse is she left her 18 year old daughter behind who is still in High School. It isnt her fault though so I am letting her stay as long as she needs. When I asked the girlfriend' What about your daughter" she replied "shes 18..she'll figure it out." Its things like that which make it all the easier to ler her go.
One might say then why the heck didn't you leave ? Well she had her good qualities.
She was responsible, smart, honest and very cute and faithful up until last month . Those qualities in themselves are hard to find.
I am not afraid of change and I am actually looking forward to moving on. Many of my friends say the guy did me a favor but that don't make it any easier. Now I have the opportunity to just meet people and in time meet a special woman I can actually get along with. I just wanted to point out my reason for the ignoring. There is a reason for just about everything.
Can anyone relate? | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/19/2008 10:56:20 AM | “A woman is like your shadow - follow her, she flies; fly from her, she follows” Nicolas de Chamfort - 18th century playwright.
As we can see, this is not a new idea.
Perhaps we might think of this as a remark on the odd attraction some (most? all?) women have to the "bad boy".
Ignoring her then becomes part of the abusive "bad boy" repertoire, and she apparently laps this up and wants more of the same.
I don't claim to understand it, but like the OP, I have seen it in operation enough times that I believe it cannot be all that uncommon.
My somewhat selfish desire is that we all get in touch with what we really want and learn to ask for it. This would go a long way toward simplifying my life in this 21st century....
Have a great day.
Russ
PS: M. Chamfort seems to have been a pretty insightful man, here is another gem : “The contemplative life is often miserable. One must act more, think less, and not watch oneself live.” | |
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campsy
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Joined: 1/15/2008
Msg: 155 | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/19/2008 11:58:30 AM |
I am sitting here thinking of all the guys who have ignored me were ACTUALLY interested...mmmm things are never what they seem huh?
Therein lies the rub, I ignore the ones I don't find at all attractive as well.
And if a guy is good at it, which I am at this particular game, you'll pull your hair out trying to figure which category you are in if you like me. For those of you I sense have that no tolerance approach where you stamp your foot down like an impatient child and say "if he ignores me he's gone, i don't play games!!!!" (total hypocrites by the way) - What I like to do is guesstimate how much time you think is reasonable to get back to you, or how much rejection you will tolerate, and just push those limits by a day, an hour, whatever I think appropriate, or tease you just a little more than the line I think you have drawn in the sand. That way if you call me out on it I can make you feel like you are being crazy and unreasonable, and accuse you of playing games. Which you have really, if you set some arbritrary standard, some line in the sand - "He has to call me by friday or he's gone!" <- You are playing a game. It's just that you are playing it by yourself, without including the other person, who doesn't even really know the rules, nor can he be expected to play by them in the exact way you are.
The point is, I wouldn't do this to you if I was serious about you anyway. It's just a really efficient seduction technique as it requires very little time and energy. It's also pretty amusing sometimes. | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/19/2008 1:07:51 PM | No way of course we like attention. If you're not willing to make an effort don't bother in the first place.  | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/19/2008 2:56:39 PM |
i used to be with a girl from israel.how do i get over her?
See "Portnoy's Complaint" for the definitive answer.
;^)
Russ | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/19/2008 6:29:30 PM | | Please God nooooooooooo...don't ignore the women....some women want mystery and suspense, but there are plenty of wats to spice things up with ignoring them...I think it truly depends on the woman and what she wants, but by ignoring a woman, she may really think that you are not interested ...God, I have known to many guy friends who do that crap and it blows up in their face! | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/20/2008 10:11:33 AM | Sounds like 'games ' to me , women DO NOT like to be ignored, I am talking to a guy who tried this sh*t, and i almost ignored him for good........ Women like to know your thinkin about them, they like to be pursued .
Now that doesnt mean , be a stalker, or be too easy, dont 'over due it'.... | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/20/2008 11:34:30 AM |
The point is, I wouldn't do this to you if I was serious about you anyway.
I believe this is the point. Those of us who have a couple of years and probably baggage under our belts already know this.
If a guy is serious about you he will pay attention to you. If a guy is interested he will call, or return your phone call.......
I am personally shocked by the games that men play (I know not all do, I know women play games too- just not one of them). I do not like manipulative people | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/20/2008 11:44:22 AM | everyone manipulates. Our society would be in constant conflict if we could not feign interest, disinterest, fib, lie, and patronize. This one manipulation happens to make women want to have sex with you sometimes.
As a guy it's very difficult to feel sorry for women over it, because they fall for it despite claiming to hate it, and since they like to take on the role as the gatekeepers in the dating world, turning the tables on them is satisfying. | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/20/2008 1:01:03 PM | | No, they generally don't. If a guy ignored me, I'd probably just move on because I'd lose interest in that type of person. | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/20/2008 3:43:40 PM |
everyone manipulates. Our society would be in constant conflict if we could not feign interest, disinterest, fib, lie, and patronize. This one manipulation happens to make women want to have sex with you sometimes.
As a guy it's very difficult to feel sorry for women over it, because they fall for it despite claiming to hate it, and since they like to take on the role as the gatekeepers in the dating world, turning the tables on them is satisfying.
Most women on here are trying to find a match, love, relationship......
You are apparently on here to find sex.
You are into victimizing and manipulating women. 
Which is not acceptable no matter how gullible or vulnerable they are.
You are showing your stripes here honey and it is not a pretty picture. The point is the women who are responding here are saying "We are onto you!" We are not the naive little girls you are manipulating.
When women say that men are dogs, or lump all men into a negative catagory they are refering to men like you. | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/21/2008 3:07:47 PM |
Most women on here are trying to find a match, love, relationship......
You are apparently on here to find sex.
You are into victimizing and manipulating women.
Which is not acceptable no matter how gullible or vulnerable they are.
You are showing your stripes here honey and it is not a pretty picture. The point is the women who are responding here are saying "We are onto you!" We are not the naive little girls you are manipulating.
When women say that men are dogs, or lump all men into a negative catagory they are refering to men like you.
I am also here to make friends... | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/22/2008 9:07:29 AM | I would be confused if I was ignored. I don't like it. I would probably be hurt as well.
I don't understand games like that. They are frustrating and I wouldn't tolerate it. | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/22/2008 1:26:01 PM | Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 2/15/2007 1 38 PM
By: DJCHICKIE401
There's a difference between ignoring someone and pacing yourself and not coming on too strong. I think these things get confused and turned into the word "ignore" as a description. Obviously if you totally ignore someone from the beginning you won't get very far. That's an extreme way of putting it. Rather show interest and be laid back about it and let them participate in the exchange once they decide they are interested in return. It's a middle ground between declaring your love for a compete stranger and acting like they don't exist.
This post best addressed the issue in my opinion. Pace yourself. At the same time please don't confuse women who say they want directness with a "Tea Kettle Effect" of expression. Meaning if you think you can just walk up to a woman and just poor all your deepest feelings of desire to her head on, you might as well catch the next flight to the Himalayas to join the Monks. You'd scare the living heck out of them.. | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/22/2008 1:36:22 PM | | "...they find this behavior both sexy and mysterious until later in the relationship." Later in the relationship, those are the key words. If I'm interested in a real relationship which will develop and grow, I may be initially attracted to the "mystery" man who doesn't know what the heck he wants and is very wishy washy, but that initial attraction doesn't last long because I don't deal well with emotional confusion. | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/22/2008 4:26:22 PM | I do have to agree with this post! You can ignore a lady from the start. I think pacing yourself and showing interest is key. Now when there is a sign that she digs you, then you could ignore her somewhat but still be well manered and show her a good time. Then she will be following you and calling you everytime. Caution is when you ignore a lady too much you might lose her. You have to read her limits and play with it.
It sounds funny but it works, I done the same game many times and it works. Wish I did not have to do it because it seems so systematic, but when you are constantly nice to a lady, they are going to walk all over you. | |
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| Do women like being ignored?
Posted: 5/22/2008 4:40:49 PM | To be honest with you OP, they would have to capture my attention first in order to follow up with the "I'm going to ignore you" card since I rarely pay attention to anyone when I'm out and about.
Sans | |
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