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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 9/22/2007 9:57:03 AM | Yes, apologies for being off-topic. Cell phones and driving should probably be another thread.
Just a quick clarification on my part. I never disputed there aren't safer alternatives. Bluetooth technology has been available for a few years now. I just haven't seen too many drivers use it, that's all. I welcome the day when automakers "idiot-proof" cars and force people to stop multi-tasking with their cells, but until that day happens I will never let up voicing my displeasure because I think the practice is inherently dangerous, grossly underreported, and taken too much for granted.
Btw, the argument that some people drive thousands of miles using their cells without an accident is no defense against its abuse. There are way too many accidents that ARE attributable to cell distraction for me to be comfortable with. I also know of many unsafe drivers (speeders, tailgaters, frantic lane changers, etc) that travel thousands of mile without an accident, but I wouldn't want to be in their vicinity when their luck runs out. All it takes is the one accident caused by cell distraction that YOU'RE directly involved in to make it matter to you. | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 9/22/2007 11:38:45 AM | Not reading to the end of the thread, so if I repeat someone else's thoughts, please excuse.
If a guy can't accept that my kids/family/job/whatever takes priority over his insecurity on a first meet, then he's not the guy for me. If my child is hurt and needs me, he needs me. If my elderly parent has another stroke and someone needs to find me, they need to find me. That will ALWAYS take priority over a coffee date with someone I've known for 5 minutes. And I would expect the man I'm with to feel the same about his kid/parent/etc.
Having said that, casual calls from your coworker/friend/brother to find out how it's going or if you'll bring home beer are not emergencies and are unacceptable. That's what caller ID and voicemail is for!
I have to say it makes me a bit sad that common courtesy seems to be a thing of the past. | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 9/22/2007 4:09:41 PM | Thank you motownmaniax for a great response. Anyone who thinks they aren't adding to a dangerous situation by using cell phones while driving has their head in the sand. Maybe they don't have the accidents....they certainly contribute to the cause.
OK back to dating....put the phone on vibrate and concentrate on your date..... | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 11/16/2007 8:07:40 PM | I have no problem with a date having their cell on a date, At my age most of the women I date have kids, So I understand why they would have it on.
Has'nt happened yet but an important phone call would be a good excuse to exit a date thats not going well..lol. I'm sure people do that, Better than the sliping out the back..
From what I've heard from friends I've met here, I would'nt blame em for doing either.. | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 11/16/2007 8:37:39 PM | Well, this is a difficult one, I'm on of those who never thought I would ever need a cell phone at all. However, it's amazing how quickly life changes and it's a a god-send for a variety of reasons...
I take my cell phone with me for a couple of reasons, one of which is security. However, if all is well, and I'm not expecting any "business calls" then the cell phone is off. Unfortunatley, sometimes, tight scheduling becomes an issue, so having a cell phone close by to say "do you mind if I call to say I might be a little late, as I am expected somewhere in (# of minutes)" ?  I would really like to spend some more time with you ....has never been an issue.
The problem seems to be "manners"; I'm sorry, but if you are on a date with someone and they are "chatting" someone else up? It's an issue..or Text Messaging... However, if someone receives an emergency call...people, get real! Life happens....that is what cell phones should be used for.....
Just my opinion :)
Gail | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 11/17/2007 3:58:05 PM | I have been thinking about this issue for some time and would love to throw it to the readers...cell phones on a first date. I think any woman/man that would bring a cell phone into the restaurant with them on a first date is rude,inconsiderate,and is downright out of place in the singles dating world. I know women/or men will make excuses like,"my kids have this and this and they might need to get in contact with me"...sorry,not good enough...you should have taken care business before the date. My mom and dad did fine and they didn't have cells when I wasn't around yet during their dating lives. I just personally find it offensive to keep answering phones,and telling callers that "you can call me back" during a "first meeting" is totally out of place. What do other single people think about this issue?
eh hem,, apparently you arent familiar with children,, they tend to get into stuff and get hurt,, often at the most inconvienient times. it is rude to answer a phone during a date if its anyone but home calling. if the kids get hurt the cell phone is the best and fastest way to get mom or dad. it is kind of chilish and whiny to expect someone to leave the cell in the car. turning it off or to silent is fine.
but you werent really upset about them having the phone on their person, were you?? you didnt seem to be. seriously if they dont answer it and you dont see it, why do you care if its in the purse or pocket?
when i was growing up and my parents went out ( together mind you, they were married to eachother) they were always in contact and left contact numbers in case of emergencies. but back then we didnt have the communication technology we have today.
what is rude is when you are the cashier and the person you are ringing up and taking money from wont hang up their phone when completing the transaction. or ppl who talk real loud on their phones in public, or ppl who use those blue tooth things in their ears in places other than their own cars, or ppl who plug in the charger at the restaurant ( yes i did see this), or ppl who continue conversations while at the bank tellers window. ( my branch wont wait on you if you're on the phone, they even had to post a sign for the rude morons who had to have it pointed out) or ppl who,,,, the list is endless. | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 11/17/2007 6:26:29 PM |
I think any woman/man that would bring a cell phone into the restaurant with them on a first date is rude,inconsiderate,and is downright out of place in the singles dating world.
OK, fair enough. That's what you think.
I think you're wrong.
So, we agree to disagree.
My standard is that it is rude to answer an unimportant call, but I can live with someone answering to say "I'm with someone and can't talk now. Can I call you later?" Texting back and forth, would also annoy me.
Merely having the phone, in case of emergency, is something I expect most people to do, as a natural habit. In 2007 others in our lives expect to be able to get ahold of us quickly, in case something truly urgent comes up. This would especially pertain to business people, who have chosen to meet over lunch as a "first date". | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 11/17/2007 6:37:07 PM | Nope -- don't need one for the most part. I have one, but never turn it on unless I need to make a call. I don't what ANYONE interrupting a me at at restaurant, movie, play, shopping, or visiting with friends and relatives. Whatever it is can wait until I get home.
I have been places where people can't be unconnected for a few hours and they usually wind up ruining the above activities for those around them. One particular time, some rude woman took her phone call in the middle of a lecture and spoke loudly instead of excusing herself. A number of us turned and stared her down until she left. | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 11/17/2007 7:23:54 PM | Rude people are rude. Rudeness is the problem, not the cell phone.
I have had dates, a time or two, see someone she knows in the restaurant, and then she goes over to talk to that friend for several minutes. To me, that's rude, and tells me all I need to know about her. Ditto, if she's more than 15 minutes late.
A cell phone is just a "thing", a bit of technology. Having it with you, in case of an emergency is the norm and custom in our society and time. Think about that woman cited above, in the lecture. Most likely almost everyone else at the lecture had a cell phone also, yet it was just the one rude woman, who misused her cell phone. If no one had a cell phone, she'd be the one chatting with her friend in person, in the middle of the lecture. Boors are boors, and have been since time began. Those are the "world revolves around me" types, who think whatever they wish to do is just fine. In other words, really 'bad dates", worse "girlfriends", and miserable wives. | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 11/18/2007 6:03:42 AM | wow OLDSOUL.. what you described sounds heavenly!
note to self>> get one of those "unplugged" places for myself. perhaps on a secluded lake.
while i dont think having your cell phone with you and answering emergency calls when out on a date is that big of a deal. Its probably best to communicate that to the person you are going out with first. a simple " my mom is 78 and in failing health, if my phone rings from a sibling, im gonna answer it"
and to the poster that mentioned something to the effect that as a society we are steadily losing any sence of decency to ourselves and eachother. As well, i think personal integrity and honor are takin a nose dive too. political correctness was ok at first, now its just gone way off the deep end into you can address anyone with direct honesty. like "hey, your lazy and thats why we are firing your a$$". | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 11/23/2007 6:33:45 PM | | talking on ur cellphone on a date is rude. plain and simple. unless its a very important call i guess. that happened to me one time because i was on call at work. | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 11/23/2007 9:13:17 PM | | I take my cell everywhere I go. But when I'm on a date, it's not gonna ring. I either keep it on "silent" or "vibrate". I think it's rude when you're at a restaurant and your company can't hang up long enough to order. While I think it's wise to always have your phone with you, there's a time and place for everything! | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 1/4/2008 2:37:28 PM | | Well, after spending years in the restaurant industry, I can tell you there is nothing ruder than someone talking on their cellphone at a dinner. It's obtrusive, it definitely shows a lack of class. We all have phones and often we may have to use them. Easy enough to excuse yourself if it is very important meaning an emergency and no one will disrespect you for that. Turn it on vibrate and don't answer it. If it's an emergency, be cordial, respectful go somewhere private if you can and make the call. I can tell you from a restaurant side, all the staff laugh when they see people on their cellphones talking business and acting all important, when really if they had any tact would use better judgement. The time you spend with others should be there time, not your time to answer phones and interrupt their time with. Time is a precious commodity, who wants to make time for someone who has no time for you. If your phone is more important than the date you are on, then you clearly don't deserve my time. | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 1/4/2008 4:07:27 PM | | Aside from emergencies, I see no earthly purpose for cell phones. I don't have one and don't want one. I hate them. The worst invention ever! Needless to say, anyone who even looked at her cell phone on a date with me would not get a second. | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 1/4/2008 5:06:22 PM | I would say you need one.. I always have mine. This would be a saftey issue. The key is to turn off the ringer. I do this when I go to dinner with anyone though. It is rude to recieve phone calls while out with others.
I find it annoying if someone has the ringer on during a date. So I partially agree with you. I don't think the phone should be left at home though, which sounds like what you might be saying here... | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 1/4/2008 6:37:33 PM | | I don't really care as long as they don't have a conversation on the phone while the date is happening. I respond to texts on date if I was ever on a date. It doesn't matter really. Its my land line so the date doesn't have a say in the matter. It goes where I go. And it stays on weather they like it or not. I do have a life. I'll have the common curtsy to tell the person to call me back. A text is no big deal cause your not talking on the phone. | |
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naeco
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Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 593 | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 1/4/2008 6:48:16 PM | Hardly anyone even calls me on my cell phone but I feel very nervous if I happen to forget it at home and my daughter isn't with me....even if she is with my parents. It's just how I am....I need to know that I'm only a call away. If she is with me and we're out....big deal (like I said, hardly anyone calls me)
Of course, I agree....taking calls while on a date is rude. That's what voice mail is for.
As for the fake "emergency" phone call 15 minutes into the date....I never did arrange any of those but I probably should have! LOL | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 1/4/2008 6:50:00 PM | You could use it to play Tetris while your date is in the loo , or phone the restaurant asking the whereabouts of your server , seeing as how the wineglass is empty again .  | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 1/5/2008 1:47:17 AM | I carry my cell phone with me everywhere but in the past when I am was on a date I always turned it to vibrate or just turned it off...Personally, I think it is rude to be on a date and your phone going off every few minutes...I have the texts and the net on mine so whenever I get a text and/or e-mail it makes noise...I have been on dates where the guy left his phone on and did not have kids...so there was really no excuse to have it on during our date...I think it is very inconsiderate to your date to be texting/talking on your phone to someone else...If you really want to meet someone then put your phone away or on vibrate and enjoy your time with your date...If you have kids or on call explain to your date why you have to check your phone but, most of all be honest with your date...He/she will either understand or they won't but you can never go wrong being upfront and honest...
Always,
Kat | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 1/5/2008 4:57:14 AM |
Any parent should have a phone on them when they are away from the child, just in case, be it on a date, at a doctor, or anywhere.
My grandfather told me stories of how he was never more than 25 ft away from a pay phone , just in case , you know ...
How did the human race make it this far without cell phones , truly is God's greatest miracle ... | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 1/5/2008 5:10:49 AM | It's fine to have your cell on in case your child needs you while you are out.
But some take this way too far.
I have stopped seeing men after the 2nd meet because of this. In my opinion, if I am not worthy of some undivided attention this early in 'the game', it can only get worse once you are finished trying to impress me. I dont get all ready to meet someone, just to sit there and listen to them talk on the flippen phone.
I have had dates sit there for upwards of 20 mins, telling thier kid what they ordered, what the restaurant looks like etc...why is this so important? Tell your child all about your date when you get home, and actually participate in the date!
My son calls, asks if I need an excuse to leave (LOL) and then that's it.
And dont get me started on business calls thru dinner. Tacky, tacky, tacky. | |
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| Cell Phones On a Date,Do You Really Need It?
Posted: 1/5/2008 10:35:13 AM | Having a cell phone with you, and using a cell phone are 2 different things.
I can understand that people may have things happening in their lives that made need sudden attention, but that does not justify ignoring our companions to chat needlessly.
If somebody invited you to their home and your host or hostess spent most of their evening chatting on their home phone we would think they were rude, and why should it be any different for cell phones.
I think most folks would be able to understand if you have to take a call to deal with an issue, but if you are chatting about what the girl in accounting wore to work today, or the weather, well you just might be rude. | |
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