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Thread: should i continue letting her talk to him???

JMW*

Joined: 1/14/2007
Msg: 26

should i continue letting her talk to him??? Posted: 3/31/2007 1:03:19 PM
The phone works both ways. So does the email and letters. Instead of fretting, let her try to call him. After a few messages he will get the hint or get lost. Then you dont have to be the bad guy

JustJohn561

Joined: 3/21/2006
Msg: 27
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should i continue letting her talk to him??? Posted: 3/31/2007 1:26:47 PM
im sure he will call on Fathers day! Actually, you should have her call him on Father's day and on his birthday... Maybe that will be enough to shock him into being a bit more communicative with your child. I doubt it, but what do you have to lose? I know its hard to do, but you have to try and encourage the relationship with her father... she is only 6 now, but when she gets old enough to understand relationships better, she will remember what and what you did not do during these times. Do you really want to do ANYTHING that would make her think you sabotaged her relationship with her father? Even if it is just the mere perception.. I know I wouldn't.

sweetestthang

Joined: 9/13/2006
Msg: 28
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should i continue letting her talk to him??? Posted: 3/31/2007 1:34:21 PM
see....that would be possible to call him if i had a number to get ahold of him....do u really think i never thought of that idea myself.....hmm... and the fathers day crack was because last year thats the only day she heard from him...not on her birthday...not on christmas...not on just any given day to say i love u baby....but just on fathers day...i guess he wanted recognition for something...not sure what!

HotBecca

Joined: 12/14/2006
Msg: 29

should i continue letting her talk to him??? Posted: 4/7/2007 10:22:42 AM
Here is my two cents.... I am a single mother as well, my ex works away alot and doesn't always have a phone nearby. So it could be a month between phone calls to our sons. They are also heartbroken when they haven't heard from him in awhile. So I will give you the same advice that I live by.... I look at it, who am I to tell the father of my children that he can't see or talk to his kids. They are his kids and always will be, if you stop him from seeing or talking to your daughter in the long run it will be you that she resents if she ever knew it was you that put a complete stop to it. I know it's hard to see her sad but it will be you that she depends on even when she's 30. I lived pretty much the same life growing up. My dad didn't see us much, I depended on my mom to be mom and dad, if that makes sense. To this day, even at 32 years old, my mom and I are best friends. So my advice to you is don't stop him from seeing her, the only way I would say to put a stop to it is if he hurt her physically, but that's a whole different story.

singlemom2719

Joined: 12/4/2005
Msg: 30

should i continue letting her talk to him??? Posted: 4/7/2007 10:31:46 AM
i have an almost 5 year old and i was doing the same thing bout a year ago and i finally said "hey your killing your daughter" he had it in his head that he was helping but you know what he isnt. if he continues i would give him an ultimatum and say hey its you or her he has to make a choice mine made a choice he sends a birthday and christmas card every year but she never speaks to him directly i give her little messages from him you know "daddy alled he loves you and misses you" but she never speaks to him you know its makes it just a little less real for her and she seems to adjusted well to it try it but obove all YOU are her mother no one knows her like you you do what your gut tells you is best for her good luck

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