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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/14/2007 8:54:48 PM | | Maybe the places you go has a younger crowd? or do you meet mostly younger guys online and in person? Just a thought....Its just a matter of time...I also get approached from guys 10 years younger at times..but it doesnt bother me Its flattering if anything.. | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/16/2007 6:10:06 AM | i think the internet is a good place to start.. look at some profiles and send a message.. im sure most men will think yeahhhh haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! if they got one.. most dont refuse such a pretty girl.
im 33.. and i find dating ok.. dont have problem with age brackets.. depends how desperately u want kids i guess?? that could place some pressure on the situation. i am not that fussed with the whole kids thing so..
but ... make the first move.. honestly..
its the 2000's after all.. embrace them! | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/17/2007 12:18:19 PM | It just seems like everyone is looking for Mr. Perfect. I feel women should to cut us older guys a little slack. You are fantastic looking but I bet if we passed on the street you wouldn't give me the time of day. I was married to a woman 9 years my senior with two children. While it was greatly rewarding, Ultimately it did not work out. I did realize though that I would love to have some kids of my own some day, as I really enjoyed parenting. Women say having kids takes a toll on their body, being married took a toll on mine, but I'm working at getting it back.
But for now, like a dog let off his chain I just want to see whats out there, meet some people, have some fun and hopefully meet that special someone.
It's a shame you live so far away but again, I probably wouldn't get a second look at the moment, even though I'm financially secure, clean split, own my own home, no baggage, great job, nice vechicles, etc. etc. | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/17/2007 6:22:13 PM | Try checking your mail settings about receiving mail. I'm 44 read your profile and couldn't see why your not receiving tons of mail. So I tried to send you an email as a test. POF said that your not receiving mail from my age groop. OK I'm 44. So I had my younger roommate try it. Same thing happened. He is 37. I think it's safe to say that the reason your only receiving mail from younger men in their 20's, is because thats how you have it set. It's that or their is some kind of problem with POF.
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/17/2007 8:50:29 PM | I don't...lol and hell I'm 45, But I got moves like a 30 year old. I'm a late bloomer.
Uhhhh by the way, I used to live in Massachusetts! Buzzards Bay area, Wow wish I lived around there now!
The way I see it is ya look for someone who looks the way you want and has the maturity you need, How simple is that? If I find someone in my own age group who has those qualities ill go for it. But it don't seem to be materializing to quickly. Hang time is sometimes a problem w/ older women in bed, They dont like to play around a lot. So that's what sucks about looking younger and being older. It's somewhat confusing, and I hate to lie about my age to get a date, but I have, and we had a great time but there's still the lie....... | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/18/2007 12:30:49 PM | | I have the same problem. You are definitely not alone. Very rarely does a guy close to my age, email me on pof. There's nothing wrong with younger guys, but I don't feel we are looking for the same things. | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/20/2007 4:46:14 AM | | Too bad about all the attention you've been getting from those pesky 20 somthing guys. I'd be more than happy to invite you out for some intelligent conversation, but it's a heck of a long way from Mass. to Victoria Canada. Maybe in our next lives? | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/20/2007 7:12:50 PM | April 20, 2007
You are certainly a very attractive young lady. I understand why you
would like to find an older man than you instead young man in their twenties.
I have read so many profiles in which men in their 50's and 60's would like
to meet younger girls 18 to 45, 35-45, etc. They feel handsomen and a lot
younger that what they really are. I suppose this is the reason they want to
have a relationship with younger woman without thinking that 20 or 25 yrs.
of difference is just a little too many! Wish you good luck!! Luly | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/23/2007 9:15:48 AM | It is sad that in the 21st century (2007) women still do not ask men out. What happened to the quest of for equality of men & women. Yes, I know the answer to that. The woman could be rejected, but they would learn from that and be more understanding of the difficulty men face asking someone out.
Take control of you dating and show interest in a guy if you are interested. If you do not want to date younger guys, then do not.
good luck | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/23/2007 9:50:54 AM | tbh, I think its a strange situation
Basically i think older men arent as confident sometimes as younger men and find the rejection (if it happens) harder to handle
Personnaly i have no age preference, although i do find the women in her late 20's early 30's has better conversation than someone of 19,20 | |
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Jemue
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Joined: 1/26/2005
Msg: 92 | |
| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/23/2007 11:38:49 AM |
I would like to attract men my own age; but honestly need some advice.
Depends on what your doing to attract whom I would of thought.
If you are in the environment with the 20 somethings opposed to the 30 somethings then that might be an issue.
Personally I go for my own age or older so at the moment that would be 31-40 ish for relationship, so it isn't the case that guys like me don't exist :) | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/23/2007 1:45:22 PM | OP, just for the record, the situation you are talking about is not gender specific. It happens to us guys too. Over the past few years I have found I get contacted more by women who are either 12-14 years older than me or 12-14 years younger. To be honest, I am sure they are all wonderful ladies, but it's simply beyond the point of common references for what I am looking for. I used to joke regarding the younger women, that if they couldn't name the 4 Beatles, then we probably wouldn't have much in common. Contrary to what some women might think the age preference isn't so much about how you look (not that it is unimportant), but more to do with finding common ground to relate. Like yourself I would prefer to date someone within 2-3 years of my age range in either direction, but it doesn't seem to work out that way. As such, I remain patient and hopeful. Good luck!
Have fun ;)
PS: I should also note that for whatever reason, since I began online dating, I have become incredibly popular with East European, Russian, African and Asian women too. I can't for the life of me figure out why? Do women have that problem too?  | |
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Jemue
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Joined: 1/26/2005
Msg: 94 | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/24/2007 6:16:57 AM | | no worry about that, your age men are dating with 40' and 50' women. guys in your age are terrified with young girl, they know that their sex is not as good as before. | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/24/2007 4:40:35 PM |
But seriously. Looking at your picture, it is obvious that you are VERY attractive, and look younger then your age.
Some older guys, or perhaps guys in your age group as well, might find you an unrealistic proposition. Not sure if I worded that right.
Us old farts hate to get turned down. Our egos are too fragile. Opps, did I just say “us?” Well of course I meant everyone but me.
Since you are so pretty, it would take a guy with a lot of self confidence, or a “What the hell” attitude to have the courage to walk up to you at the supermarket, and ask if you could help pick out mellons.
I have heard it said, that some of the most attractive females often times do not get hit on. There is a reason for that. Us guys tend to go with a possibility, rather then reaching for the stars.
I so totally agree.
My opinions on your photos:
1. Sitting with camo top on is from September 06. You look a very good 30s.
2. Sitting on couch with turtleneck is from Dec 06. You look 22. Having said that, a stunning 22.
3. Working out with white tank is last week, April 07. You look 18. Need I say more?
I have no idea how you can pull off looking so good!!!
No wonder the guys in their early 20's go for you. You look their age, or a bit younger! So they would not look or feel out of place going out with you, which is important to most men. Also, you look way more attractive than a lot of girls their age. They probably also find you much easier to talk to than girls their age. So to them, you are the all-round package.
If a 30+ man went out with you, people would assume that he is dating a much younger hottie, which generally causes a lot of jealousy, and a lot of people trying to split you up. So he would probably not go for you. But some men do date very attractive women.
Some men date very attractive women because they are only looking for sex, and they are going for whatever they can get, because they are only looking for one night. They will lie through their teeth and do not expect you to stay around once you get to know them.
However, some men feel that they have a lot to offer a woman, and they feel that it would not be out of place to date a very attractive woman. You can always tell these men: typically they take pride in their appearance, act confidently with every woman they meet and do not feel a need to use cheesy chat-up lines to break the ice. If they do use a line, it's a very good one.
You'll be more likely to find a men who would be willing to date you in a place where there are a lot of women who look like you and are your age, like an upmarket bar or a health food store, or - as I discovered today - a climbing centre.
But they won't see much point in going down the local supermarket hoping to meet the woman of their dreams if that woman would be very unlikely to be there. If they are there, they will most likely be so stunned to see you there that they would forget to ask you out, or go all tongue-tied and say something stupid.
However, the good news for the unapproachably beautiful women out there, is that most guys do not feel negative towards a female who makes the first move. Actually, it’s a great ego booster, so take the reigns by the deer, find someone you find attractive, and say “hello.”.
This is quite close to the truth. However, it is very important for you to reassure a man that although you have other men interested in you, you are still interested in him and would be keen on going out on a date with him. He could still assume you are just there to get some male attention and have no intention of giving him any chance whatsoever. If you do let him know you're interested, he may assume you are lonely because you just broke up with someone, and are only looking for a rebound.
So say "hello", let him know that you're attractive, but you're more interested in a mature guy who's looking for more than a one-night stand. | |
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| Do older men stay away from women in their 30's?
Posted: 4/24/2007 7:46:07 PM | To all you women in your 30s who find it hard to meet a 30+ man for an LTR:
1) Attraction and age:
When it comes down to it, most men and women prefer an older and more experienced partner, who looks after themselves, because they are both attractive and charming.
Unfortunately, most people don't use their experience, so they don't look after themselves, so they are usually not as attractive or as charming as they were in their 20s.
So they expect 30+ men/women to be a lot less attractive than their 20+ counterparts, and they seem much more attracted by the fact that we are more attractive now than in our 20s. If you are interested in them, they are very keen. If you are not, then they are very displeased and could try and blow your chances with other people in their vicinity.
2) Age-differences in relationships
This is what I have found as a man:
Women younger than me have welcomed me for a relationship and used sex as a means of obtaining the relationship, i.e. they thought they could use sex to get a relationship.
Women my age have been clear that if I was willing to have a relationship with them, that sex would be part of the package, i.e. they thought they can offer sex to me to get a commitment.
Women older than me have clearly offered to have me move in with them if I would have regular sex with them, i.e. they thought of me as a toyboy.
This is true of my 20s and of my 30s.
This is what men have told me:
Men who pursued women older than them have welcomed a relationship and used sex as a means of obtaining the relationship, i.e. they thought they could use sex to get a relationship.
Men who pursued women their age have been clear that if the woman was willing to have a relationship with them, that sex would be part of the package, i.e. they thought they can offer sex to the woman to get a commitment.
Men who pursued women younger than themselves have clearly offered financial rewards and security in order to ensure regular sex, i.e. they thought of the woman as a dolly bird, the female equivalent of a toyboy.
This is what men of all ages have told me.
3) Confidence, shyness and age:
In my 20s, I was terminally shy. Although women preferred me to be confident, they could accept the fact that I was shy. So most of my dates were women who approached me, or a friend of a friend.
I am now in my late 30s, and women expect me to be confident, due to my age and experience, and they no longer tolerate the fact that I am still shy. They will often flirt with me, as they expect that I will approach them and be very charming. However, if I am now even slightly nervous with a woman, they get very disinterested.
People expect that having the confidence to go up to someone develops with age and experience, irrespective of gender.
In reality, that confidence only develops with practise, which is helped along by encouragement from family and friends.
4) Jealousy and age
I have found that the older and more experienced I am than a man, the more likely it is that that man will be jealous of the attention I get from women, and the more likely he will try to sabotage any chance of a relationship, and the more he will pursue a woman I show interest in. He will also more aggressively and craftily try to discourage me to approach or to be accepted by any groups of women he might be interested in.
Almost every time I have been approached by a young woman, and there has been a male youth in the vicinity who was attracted to her, he has demanded I leave or fight him, or tried to block my way, even before I have said one word to the woman. Yet I have not been approached for a fight in any other circumstance, despite the fact that as a youth, many times youths approached me for a fight.
I have also found that the older and more experienced I am, the more likely it is that a woman will be jealous of the attention I lavish on other women, and the more likely she will try to sabotage any chance of a relationship, and the more she will try to discourage me from approaching any woman I show interest in, and to discourage any woman I show interest in from accepting any invitations I might offer. She will also more aggressively and craftily try to discourage me to approach or to be accepted by any groups of women he might be interested in.
Women my age act as though young women must be interested in me, but that I would not even be interested to even be in the same places that you people attend. When I told people that I took up a martial art for self-defence, someone my age told me that I was having a mid-life crisis. Women my age have repeatedly been much less subtle or stylish about their advances than their more youthful counterparts. Women my age also seem horrified by the idea that I might be interested in anyone other than them.
I am not so restricted in my views as I used to be, but I am finding it harder and harder to meet men and women my age who share the same views about relationships as me. It seems that people are getting more pessimistic of relationships than they used to be, and more focussed on sex. I am becoming more open as I get older, so as I am less and less conservative and more open, other people are becoming more and more conservative of who is and is not acceptable to date.
5) Summary:
Both men and women, of all ages, expect you to be both less attractive and more confident than 10 years ago.
As a result, you will encounter many more genuine offers than you used to, and a lot less false ones, as the rogues will assume you are a lot less naive than you used to be, from a much wider age range, however unsuitable they may be.
So get with the program: Learn to take more control of your life than you used to, and enjoy more of the offers.
Some of the younger men are much more mature and intelligent than you give them credit for, but if you want a man your age, you must be prepared to take the initiative more often.
The older you get, the more important it is to grow up and take more responsibility of your life. However, this does not necessarily mean growing old.
Stop acting like you are a naive 20-year old, who waits for men to ask you out, because people will treat you as though you are more confident and experienced, whether you are or not.
Nor assume that you only have a possibility of a meaningful relationship with someone who is of the same age and background as you, because you are more experienced now, and you have a much wider range of interests and knowledge to draw from, so you can relate to many more people than you used to.
You will find it also easier and easier to enjoy more equality in your relationships, as you are more aware of when a situation is fairer to your partner than you, or vice versa.
The only down side is that if you prefer your partner to be the more dominant force in your relationships and not yourself, this will be less and less likely as you get older.
Also, people will be more disapproving and jealous of your lifestyle, and expect you to conform more to the lifestyle choices they feel will fit in better with their own choices, so you will need to more vocal of where you stand and you will need to stand up for yourself more, or you may find that the gorgeous, charming 39-year-old man will be snapped up by the **** who would have ignored you 10 years ago.
So, embrace the changes your life brings, take the greater control that comes with experience and if you use that control responsibly, your life will get better and better with each passing year.
Fail to do so, and you are like the couch potato, who just watches TV and does no exercise, and wonders why they are getting less attractive as the years go by.
Its your life, so LIVE IT! | |
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