| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/9/2007 9:45:13 AM | not a problem, unless she wants you too.....4 up with the folks aswell | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/9/2007 10:46:49 AM | I would never date a man that still lives with Mommy~FOR ANY REASON!
Losers!
so you automatically assume a person is a loser because they live with their mother/ parents? So you would rather see someone stick their parents in a nursing home than show love and respect for their parents by either moving back home or having their parents live with them? Maybe your parents should have stuck you away some where when you were sick and couldnt take care of yourself.
To me, a man that lives at home because hes taking care of his elderly parents or sick parents shows me that he has respect, morals, and is willing to take responsiblity. and he has love for his parents which is something you dont see a lot of now days. The united States is the only or one of the few countries where its a normal thing to just stick your ailing family members in nursing homes.
After my divorce, my grandmother ( who raised me since i was little) was more than happy to have me come back home. It was great for both of us, neither of us had to come home to an empty house. It gave her someone to talk ( she was my best friend) I didnt have to worry about her living alone and i knew their would only be short periods of time when she would be home alone mainly duiring the day time when i was working. I also didnt have to worry about my grandma calling me at 2 in the morning because she was lonely and just needed someone to talk to her for a little bit.
so just because someone lives at home doesnt make them a loser. | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/9/2007 12:44:32 PM | I would move them in with me!
MOST men that live with their parents are NOT caregivers they are FREELOADERS!
I just wish people would'nt wear their feelings on their shoulders when they come into the forums, and understand that everyone is different, and we express ourselves in different ways. Dont judge me based on your opinion of what I meant when I typed something, and I will return the same consideration to all of you. | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/9/2007 1:39:12 PM | Eric I am in the same boat. My place is paid for and I also pay all the bills at my folks place. It is rapidly coming to the point where I would get more sleep by moving back home. My place isn't set up for elderly care or I would move them to my place. In reality both places are mine however. As I bought their place a few years ago as well.
I have resisted the idea so far but it will be a matter of time I am afraid. My dad has already gotten lost in their backyard at 2 AM. Thankfully there is a fence around the yard or he could have gotten to anywhere, but due to the fact that my mom is on oxygen I was the one who had to go find him.
Yes there is some stigma attached but that is only applied by the ones who don't know the real situations involved. | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/9/2007 2:13:38 PM | For any reason you say PLUMHAPPY>, some herein have stated they would move in with a widowed elderly mother because they don't want to see her in an old aged home PLUM HAPPY.
Hope when you are old and if you ever have children they would think the same way as the other poster about his mother. However, one would have to instill some emapathy , responsibility, kindness in them. Unfortunatly , I don't think this will be too successfull for you to do.
You truly can't be PlumHappy as your moniker bespeaks. | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/9/2007 2:19:46 PM | PLUMHAPPY YOU WRITE: Dont judge me based on your opinion of what I meant when I typed something, and I will return the same consideration to all of you.
perhaps you should have clarified instead of coming up COLD and FRIGID in your humanity.
Somepeople only have a one bedroom apt or condo. Do you suggest mother sell house and spend on something bigger for son and mother? SHould not assume.
AND FURTHERMORE, IF you really were compassionate and thoughtful about the mother mayhaps you could think about this. OLD PEOPLE HATE CHANGE , HATE TO MOVE AND HATE TO LEAVE THEIR LIFELONG HOME THEY SHARED WITH SPOUSE AND CHILDREN.
TRY GOING BEYOND YOUR SKIN PLUMHAPPY | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/9/2007 2:54:45 PM | | There are many reasons for young men and women to live with their-parents sickness of the parents, or young person. I lived with my widowed mother several years after college- after my father passed, I paid all her bills gas electricity and house insurance and shared with the groceries the only thing she had to do was buy the groceries off her shopping list. the beauty about this set up was my adjacent apt with private entrances away from the main house. This worked out great for the both of us when we needed each other we connected by notes or phone calls. This gave us security of haveing a family menber close by w/o any strange renters keeping her up all night with drinking partying, and there we a few that got evected for that reason. I later married and we started out with the same arrangements until we moved on with job promotions and career fields. Eventually the house was a life saver thru the family trust after my divorce several years later. I'm proud to have done what I could for mjy parents and the way they treated me, remember the prodical son in the bible. Think about IT! Years later the home was sold with mother in a nursing home with the big A disease. I would repeat it for my boys also. parents are parents for a life time -with unconditional Love not judgement!! the man up stairs looks after you also. Truly Blessed. | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/9/2007 5:33:07 PM | I agree... it did come off as kind of cold and frigid.
My first thought was, "What if the poor guy's house burned down? ... Oop, must be a loser then." 
While that probably wasn't the intent, I think it came off extra strong because of the phrase loser...
Of course, I rent a basement, so what do I know. | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/9/2007 7:14:41 PM | PLUMHAPPY YOU SAID MOST men that live with their parents are NOT caregivers they are FREELOADERS
I pay all the bills at my dads home. Like I said before he has Alzheimers and it is not bad now. It is getting worse.
I hope you and Quietshy get old and need care your kids say (no mom. only loser live with mom and dad.)
P.S. I think most people that have to move inand help out rather live in a four bedroom home than a one bed room apparent. | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/9/2007 7:29:18 PM | I moved in with my disabled biological mother 3 months ago, pay full cable, phone, and 1/2 rent, my own car payments, insurance and maintenance on the auto. All of the cleaning is my area and the cooking. I take care of the housework, cooking, majority of the laundry. I'm very free with my information though. You take care of yours.
Regardless of the reasons someone is at home, do they have Goals and deadlines for them? Say, to own their own home in 2-5 years and be debt free? To finish college? I'd wonder why "she's comfortable"..Does she pay rent, utilities, do her own laundry, buy her own groceries? If not, I'd be a bit concerned. Is her car in her name? Does she own a car? A few things I'd start with.. At least take the time to ask her the reasoning behind being so comfortable.(Hey you know you seem to have it really great, saving up money for a house? or new car? or getting through possibly another degree? or just be direct and ask, nicely.) You may or may not get a good answer, but at that point you can ask further questions.There again she could tell you anything you want to hear, proof is in time and her proving that she's set goals for herself. If she bulks, tell her why your asking. Ahhh but i do think honesty is the best policy, and yes sometimes it just slaps you right dead back in your face. HARD.
Only another Opinion. | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/10/2007 5:51:51 AM | Got you all yaking huh? The question was would you date a person who lives with his parents my answer was NO!
Now had the question been would I date someone who was a selfless angel that put their parents welfare before themselves? My answer might have been different! You people are great entertainment! Thank you.
I recently dated a woman in her late 30's who was living with her mother and father despite making a very nice living for herself.When I asked her why? she replied that it was just comfortable for her.
I found this a little strange but perhaps its more common then i realised,am I being to judgemental or is a person in there 30's and 40's living at home not a big deal? This was the original post..I just don't see the old sick parents did I miss something??
perhaps you should have clarified instead of coming up COLD and FRIGID in your humanity ohh cold and frigid please forgive because I don't want to date a freeloader!
AND FURTHERMORE, IF you really were compassionate and thoughtful about the mother mayhaps you could think about this Where did this sick Mother come from?
You live with your Mom don't you???
TRY GOING BEYOND YOUR SKIN PLUMHAPPY
Don't hate me because of my skin | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/10/2007 7:47:31 AM | | Plum maybe after this you will learn not to generalize. Although after reading your posts in other threads I would say that you have already shown your true character. | |
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Najade
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Joined: 1/13/2007
Msg: 38 | |
| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/12/2007 2:38:30 PM | I live at home with my parents (although a lot longer then those that have posted) and have been asked many times why and I tell them (maybe more then they what they want to hear )
I do state in my profile that I live at home and if that turns people away that's fine by me. I do have a comfortable income that enables me to have the things I want or need.(Now I have a feeling everyone may be going to read my profile ) I also state that I don't work. I am not a free loader and I do help out around the house with cutting grass, picking up poop (my dogs ), dishes etc. I also pay for rent, vet bills and food etc.
I also have found that living at home after my divorce that I no longer have a curfew (ya control freak) and can come and go as I please. It hasn't affected any of my past boyfriends or put a damper on my sex life either. (maybe because it's a very large house and they are hardly home )
To get back to the orginal post there could be another reason why she may have said "she's comfortable" (besides what others have posted). Maybe she's really not interested in you and thinks this kind of answer will make you move on.(Just a thought). So just ask what she means by being comfortable and then go from there. This way you get your answer and then the ball is then in your court to do with as you will.
Good luck and happy
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Najade
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Joined: 1/13/2007
Msg: 39 | |
| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/12/2007 2:39:13 PM | I live at home with my parents (although a lot longer then those that have posted) and have been asked many times why and I tell them (maybe more then they what they want to hear )
I do state in my profile that I live at home and if that turns people away that's fine by me. I do have a comfortable income that enables me to have the things I want or need.(Now I have a feeling everyone may be going to read my profile ) I also state that I don't work. I am not a free loader and I do help out around the house with cutting grass, picking up poop (my dogs ), dishes etc. I also pay for rent, vet bills and food etc.
I also have found that living at home after my divorce that I no longer have a curfew (ya control freak) and can come and go as I please. It hasn't affected any of my past boyfriends or put a damper on my sex life either. (maybe because it's a very large house and they are hardly home )
To get back to the orginal post there could be another reason why she may have said "she's comfortable" (besides what others have posted). Maybe she's really not interested in you and thinks this kind of answer will make you move on.(Just a thought). So just ask what she means by being comfortable and then go from there. This way you get your answer and then the ball is then in your court to do with as you will.
Good luck and happy
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/12/2007 3:03:51 PM | If she's living at home , in her 30's, and knows how to cook, that's ok.
If she's living at home , in her 30's, and doesnt know how to cook, that's bad sign. | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/13/2007 2:55:45 PM | Truly
I totally agree with you. I divorced and like I said before..it takes 2 incomes to make it now days so what is the problem with living back home for awhile? I have a female roomate and we do just fine..I spend time here and at my b/f's place and at my parents.
I feel like a gypsy at times but, my bills are paid and I have food and what I need.
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/13/2007 3:00:23 PM | I've dated 2 guys that lived at home.....
One was 32- had a job- didn't seem like he wanted to move out. (I kind of had a problem with this.... )
One that was 38 - Moved back in with his parents to go to nursing school. (I didn't have a problem with this)
The second guy had lived on his own before was in the IT field when it went to crap and decided to go to nursing school so he could do something to help people. I had a lot of respect for him.... although he didn't have any time for me! LOL | |
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| Living with the parents
Posted: 3/13/2007 3:50:25 PM | ^^^ drg1301
I hear that ... I'm beginning to question moms judgment a bit now. (Case in point) she thinks the best way to quiet the neighbors barking dog, is to agitate it further by turn the garden hose on it.
She also has a nice caged in solar heated pool (kidney shaped) with a walk way all around it. She thinks it would be a good idea to hook up the extension cord and use her new heavy duty Sho-Vac to blow any loose dust away from the pool area.
What she needs a Heavy Duty Shop-Vac for I don't know ... she must be going through a man tool phase or something.
She was planning on plugging in off the house where there's no Ground Fault Interrupter. I had to remind her that water and electricity don't mix (probably why the pool area doesn't have any outlets to begin with) ... and she'll likely tumble the Vac into the pool and try to jump in after it.
huh-boy
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On Topic:
Moving in with the foks may not be popular ... but sometimes it might be a "must do." | |
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