| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/10/2007 11:40:56 AM | Is all we need to know... do we have chemistry ? Can we know all we need to know about someone after a couple of dates? How do you deal with that? ... follow what your loins are telling you? or what your heads telling you?
Everyone is different. | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/10/2007 1:06:41 PM | I don't believe there is a 'set time' nor do i believe there is a 'too long'. It is what ever is right in that circumstance. If there is chemistry between the two of you, then you sleep with them when you want too surely???
No one should be able to tell anyone else when is right and when isn't. If someone was to tell me that if they hadn't had sex by the 4th date they wouldn't hang around....i'd tell them not to bother waiting to find out! It is obvious from that attitude what they are after in my opinion. | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/10/2007 1:29:24 PM | | i think for me, it's got to be after the 3rd date because then at least i'd have the time to work out whether it was really me that he was interested in or whether it was just another leg-over.within that time span between the 1st and 3'd date you'd pretty much know if theres chemistry there and what the other person is really about. | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/10/2007 2:00:37 PM | goldensemble
"Too many posters on here seem to think promiscuity is ok."
You are entitled to your views no matter how far back you live in the dark ages, but into days age very few..... male or female are virgins on their wedding night ,could you be in that list? | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/10/2007 2:10:07 PM | No such thing as too long, unless you are talking AFTER the wedding night lol!
I think it really depends on how very much you want her and she wants you from a blokes perspective!
i.e.
I've had dates that have been brilliant since the start and nearly eneed up in bed at the end, although TBH, I would rather really get to know someone, after all, the bodys largest (and best IMHO) sexual organ is the BRAIN!
I'd say in my experience 3rd or 4th date generally depending on the aforementioned.
Would I wait 6 months or a year or 2 years?!
Never had to, but there are bound to be some people that are REALLY worth waiting for this long.
Does that sound like a cop-out?
lol.
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/10/2007 2:46:35 PM | | I will only sleep with a person if I love them, I have NEVER had a one night stand and I have no wish to. For me sex is between 2 people who love each other hence the term "making love". Or maybe im just an old fashioned fart! | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/10/2007 3:05:24 PM | Msg 33 I am in complete agreement with you, well said.
You are entitled to your views no matter how far back you live in the dark ages, but into days age very few..... male or female are virgins on their wedding night ,could you be in that list?
Gubbins of course I am entitled to my views, I've never doubted that fact. I am 34 years younger than your good self, therefore I am well aware what it is like to live in this day and age without having the warped view that you seem to hold which is that nymphomania and satyriasism is perfectly acceptable - It is not! | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/10/2007 3:52:47 PM |
This only reflects you bigoted views
Not at all, my comments reflect my strength of character and the fact that I respect my body, see it as a temple as opposed to a vessel that needs emptying which is obviously your view.
Sex is sacred and should not be seen as "a need" that men and women are entitled to seek relief for whenever the fancy takes them. | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/10/2007 5:14:01 PM | This only reflects you bigoted views
I can't see how this can be true. If Goldensemble holds sex to be something sacred then the opposite would be the bigoted view, the view that; all humans are sexual objects to be pulled on a saturday night shagged and then forgotten about rather than sex being the fulfillment and completion of an established close relationship.
I'm not saying how I feel on this as I wouldn't like to judge but to suggest Goldensemble is bigoted because of his beliefs on this subject is plainly ridiculous. | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/12/2007 11:33:33 AM | There are times in my life when Ive behaved like an absolute tart but if I met a man who held goldensemble's views on sex I would hold him in the highest regard. I think he might be in the minority but there's nothing wrong with wanting to wait for that special moment with someone you love. | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/12/2007 11:47:50 AM | | As a rule I tend to only date women that make it known that they don't believe in sex on the first date, as this is usually a dead cert that I'll be emptying my bags in the monkey house before sunrise . | |
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djb65
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Joined: 3/4/2007
Msg: 41 | |
| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/12/2007 3:08:50 PM |
Anyway, is there an amount of time that you consider would be 'too long' before you expect to sleep with someone? Obviously not in every case, depending on circumstances, but as a general rule of thumb?
When both parties feel that it is right. But don't do anything you will regret later. | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/12/2007 3:47:04 PM | Oh shit - I think I've sussed out why no-one seems to date me more than once or twice! It's because I let it slip out during the first date chat that I like to wait at least 6 months before I get too personal.
I can be a bit of a slapper early on tho, and kiss with tongues if anyone lasts out to the 3rd or 4th date, but only in the dark. | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/12/2007 3:57:45 PM | It depends on the mood... the person... the circumstance...
Sometimes 4 hours feels too long, sometimes 4 weeks feels right. I am too old for all this playing games malarkey, if i fancy someone and they fancy me back i would sleep with them on the first night... i cant promise i will make them coffee in the morning and all that... maybe take them to the cafe if i can be bothered
Surely it just depends on the people involved? | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/12/2007 5:04:04 PM |
as this is usually a dead cert that I'll be emptying my bags in the monkey house before sunrise .
So if the lights are out when this function is performed does it matter if the curtains are closed or not..? | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/12/2007 9:05:01 PM | damned right Geneseo, it is (rarely) possible that a woman has features other than her ability to take a grisly one that may make her worth the investment..
Personally, I have heard of the "no sex on first date rule" and also the fourth date rule, but both are crap..
The no sex first daters are really just making a point that does not need making.. Sex on a second date is worse because you are only going to the second date for the sex, having tolerated the boredom of the first.. (I dont bother going to a second date if I dont get action first date.. and would not consider anyone who had a "no sex first date" rule..)
The 4th date rule is crap because by then you have probably become embroiled in someones convulted and twisted emotional traps and would rather just not bother!
Sex happens when it feels right..
And its usually soon enough to ensure you have a trip to the clinic the next week to check out the dodgy discharge.. | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/13/2007 3:22:25 AM | In the days of the caveman we (humans) followed instinct, we are not a monogamous race, it is mans instinct which brings us to procreate. Which is probably why alot of people cannot be faithful.
It's only in the times since man began to think, that marriage and "my body is a temple" and monogamy have become 'the way of man'.
Personally I've had one night stands, I've jumped into bed with a guy on the first date and formed a relationship which later broke down and I've waited till the third, fourth fifth whatever number date till I've allowed anything to happen, but every time it's been my personal feeling towards that bloke that has lead me to the decision to sleep or not to sleep with the person at that time.
More recently, I got a little frisky with a friend, and though I so wanted to rip his clothes off and do the deed, I stopped, frustrated as it left me, physically and emotionally, I'm glad I did. We've stayed friends and there's no awkwardness between us that there would have been if we had carried on.
So in short, it does depend on the feelings between the two of you at 'that moment' but it also depends on the relationship I've already got with that person. There are a few factors to consider before making the decision to sleep or not to sleep with any particular person. | |
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| Waiting 'too long' for sex - what is 'too long'?
Posted: 3/13/2007 5:41:45 AM |
Anyway, is there an amount of time that you consider would be 'too long' before you expect to sleep with someone? Obviously not in every case, depending on circumstances, but as a general rule of thumb?
In my opinion he who hesitates is a damned fool (Ok, Mae West said it first)
If you know you are atttracted to someone and there is nothing to stop you from sealing your fates by jumping each others bones, you would be a fool to waste time thinking about it - just go for it!!! | |
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