| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 4/23/2007 3:52:19 PM | Its a good move as long as the woman is not in the habit of behaving like that and is only doing it because she feels it is right with a gent like moi..
For me, I dont go on a date that will not have a chance of pleasure in it! | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 4/23/2007 11:15:59 PM | What all this is boiling down to is that everyone has a different view and no view is ever going to be all right or all wrong.
There will be those on both sides who shy away from the idea of having sex on a first date and those that have spent so much time talking to each other and getting to know each other on-line that they view the "first date" as really around the fifth. Granted there are those who will lie and lie and lie so if you slept with them at the first meeting you would only find this out then. Mostly by the fact that you never hear from them again or they are not anything like what you have come to expect. 
Personally, I have to feel extremely comfortable with the person to allow them to get that close.  If I have spoken so often to this person to the point that I felt I already knew them and sex happens then what we did was unexpected but not unwelcome. Sex is not just about urges but about emotions, personalities, attitudes.....everything.
It all depends on what each person wants out of that sexual experience. Are you looking for forever or just for now? Are you okay with sleeping with someone on the first face to face meeting? Do you feel you know the person well enough to trust them enough to allow them to be that physical with you? There are too many questions and also too many answers. It's a double edged sword and you can either be cut by it or saved by it.
Just ask yourself what do YOU feel is correct/right and all others be damned. If they don't see eye to eye with you then you should not be involved with them to begin with, right?
And I see myself getting in soooooo much trouble with some folks for this......
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 4/24/2007 6:02:55 AM | I can be a good and a bad move...
if you have spent a bit of time chatting prior then you might want to get the sex thing out of the way...
if you are out having fun and want to have a bit of a fling not a bad way...
if I wake up the next morning and you have handcuffed me to the bed and are wearing your mothers wedding dress... then it was a bad idea!!! | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 4/24/2007 6:07:42 AM | i don't see anything wrong with it. just like you said we're both consenting adults and you be surprise how many females do that same thing but don't admit it.
I would like to know if the sex is good anyway because that will keep me coming back.
I think that respect thing if you sleep with me on the first night is OVERRATED. Somthing parent and the church created to scare women. DO your thing babygirl.
1 day or a week later ...its still will be the same.   | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 4/24/2007 2:36:51 PM |
Meaning if you have sex on the first date, us men will never take the time out to wanna learn about the woman.
I had a 2 year relationship (my first love) that started with having sex very early. And (a long while later. Took me over a year before I started dating again) had another guy fall for me (and vise versa) and had a 2 month relationship (had to cut it off because of distance and conflicting schedules. But he still wants to go out again in the future, if I'm single) after having sex on the first date. Then later I had a three month 'something something' (started off as just 'fun') and the guy fell for me (but it wasn't mutual). But he was an idiot so I broke it off. Funny, that's usually how it goes. In some ways I'm more than a guy than a girl... lol Until I find someone that I care about, then it's TOTALLY different.... | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 4/24/2007 2:44:02 PM | I would not have sex on the first date. That is just how I am. A lot may disagree with me and that is fine but everyone is entitled to their own views, right?  | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 4/24/2007 2:53:01 PM | Ummm.... guys. The OP has left the thread (Msg 234). Thanks Dolly.
This one will probably resurface in a similar/related question. | |
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jaw40
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Joined: 3/7/2007
Msg: 261 | |
| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 4/29/2007 6:25:05 AM | Actualy, I am some what of a gentalman when I go out with some one. I dont expect sex nor do I even try to get sex on a first date. I think it is mostley becouse I dont want her to think that's all I want from her. Especialy if we have both been drinking. I dont want the first time we have sex to be when we are drunk becouse it probably wont mean anything other then we both got our rocks off and if I thought afterwords that we werent realy compatible in a relationship, I would feel realy bad about it becouse I would feel like I used you for sex. And thats not me. I have a conscience. I am a man and I do like sex alot but its not a game to me.
Now, if she makes the first move towards having sex. Well, It is hard for me to resist and that tells me that she doesnt care if we are realy compatible or not. She just wants to be satisfied sexualy for the moment. And thats ok too, if we are both prepared for failure in a realationship if there ever is one. I wont make the first move unless we have dated at least 3 or 4 times. you should know if you at least like the person by then any way. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 6/8/2007 5:52:14 AM | no its not a bad move as long as both partners are open about it ...
my kids mum who i was with for 16 years ,i slept with her on the first date ...there is all this crap about ya have to build up a relationship well some timesthats ok ,but ya no sometimes ya just no its not going to be anything else ...i have had relationships ,that i did not sllep on first date ,but it did not make me think there better in any way ...
and by the way any man who says its right for them but not for a woman ,then they want to live in the real world ...because we are all equal ...if ya read this ty ...yes i did babble on lol....... | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 6/8/2007 2:14:07 PM | Men think about when you spend time with them, not the dates that you are on, so:
If you slept with them very soon after getting to know them, the following could conceivably happen:
1) You fall in love, get married, etc.
2) You go for some food, and meet a guy in the local drive-in.
3) You go back to his place or a motel, and have wild, animal sex.
4) You go back to the family home, and have "more" wild, animal sex.
5) He comes home and catches the two of you on the living-room carpet.
I know a few men where they came home and found the wives with another man. They are good-looking, have money, nice people, nice kids, etc. So guys are on the lookout right from the word "go" to see if she's gonna cheat.
But they still want sex. So they want to know as soon as possible, if she's a sex-and-cheating model, or a relationship-and-marriage model. The former, is good for sex on a first date, but not to keep seeing for long. The latter, well, you can guess. So it's an easy way to determine which one you are, and how to treat you.
I don't care, personally, but damn well, if you don't care if she's a slut or not, she gets a worse opinion of you than anything else.
Oh, and there is no double standard. But men generally ask women out, not the other way around. So if a man comes off the market, and stops asking for dates, no more dates. But if a woman comes off the market, men still ask her for dates, and are persistent about it, so men have to be a lot stronger to get a relationship, and women have to be a lot stronger to stay in a relationship.
It all comes down to who is more likely to cheat in a relationship. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 6/8/2007 3:42:38 PM | Ok time to chime in...
I say there is no set rule anymore...It's different than going to a bar and meeting some random guy while you both and sleeping with him ...More times than not it's the alcohol that does the walking, the talking and the f***ing in this case.
However, it's 2007 and if we go out on a firs date with somebody that we connect with on alot of levels what is wrong with having sex with him? For those people that say he will not come back because he got it already, or those that say he will only want her for sex...How do they know for sure?? In the same right, how do you know he won't...You don't...It's called taking a chance, as long as you play it safe......It's funny that even in 2007 the double standards are still there....The whole, if she gives it up she is easy, or a ho or god forbid even a slut but if he gives it up on the first date is he no less?? Oh no I forgot that makes him a stud cause he got laid....Woohooo yeah nailed her! That's what he tells his buddies?? Come on people 2 consenting adults have voices to talk about where it's going to go before hand or afterwards....Some feel like it may scare the men off but better to scare him off and ask him before you have sex with him, especially if you do feel a connection....As apposed to asking him after wards and then you have already done it....Or not asking at all and hoping he will call. I guess what I am saying is i don't see it as a bad move under the right circumstanses... | |
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addy21
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Joined: 7/27/2007
Msg: 266 | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 8/13/2007 10:42:35 AM | | Good point, game play is rediculous. If two consenting adults choose to have fun it is their choice. I actually respect a woman more for knowing what she wants and going for it. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 8/19/2007 2:02:36 AM | | Having sex on a first date has never affected my opinion on a woman/girl. We either like each other enough to want to keep seeing each other or we don't. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 8/19/2007 3:15:56 AM | Well yes i think it is a bad move for us lady,s.Guys make the rules up all the time and with sex thing it seems too be a mans world  Thay can sleep around and thay get praised we sleep around and we get labelled. But who labels us the same guys that have slept around and slept with us so thay are worst than us.I am talking by exsperiance i dont sleep around never have done but slept with my last partner on first date and it took me 6months too find he was only using me sexually.But the best part was lol he never satisfied me so i didnt cry when i woke up too him it was your kicked too the kerb you selfish lover gone use another so all you women dont sleep with a guy on first date make him wait and if hes a decent guy he will be back and if not well you can do better A guy that pressure,s us women into sex on a first date do,s not respect he,s self so he,s not gonna respect you.us women are incontroll we got the goldmine so come on you guys who,s the golddiggers now | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 8/19/2007 4:03:25 AM | | Well I feel put off by a the kind of woman who takes ages to 'give in' .......... It shouldn't be a question of ...'giving in' . If you are very attracted to each other and the desire is there why shouldn't you both enjoy yourselves ? | |
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| Time limit
Posted: 8/19/2007 4:48:15 AM |  Their should be no time limit put on when you do have sex.althou i think you should wait too see if you are going too be in a proper relationship.too many people just want too fun as an excuse for no strings sex. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 8/26/2007 5:00:18 AM |
JASONF321: in my opinion girls put too much effort into "planing" and "making him wait." what a waist of time.
It is a real turn-off when women play games by altering their normal behavior to attempt to manipulate a man's perception of them. | |
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