| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/28/2007 6:51:22 PM | | I say yes because in my experience it tends to make many, but not all men think they can get away with anything, they take you more for granted. Not all, but generally. Having said that I frequently do give head on the first date, provided I enjoyed it and anticipate another. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/29/2007 5:11:08 AM |
I frequently do give head on the first date, provided I enjoyed it and anticipate another
Is that not sex on a first date? Maybe I should start a new thread asking 'what is sex'? | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/29/2007 5:27:31 AM |
I frequently do give head on the first date, provided I enjoyed it and anticipate another.
Seriously? And what do you get out of it? Just the hope that they'll take you out again? Actually, I was aware that a BJ became "not sex" several years ago. There have been lots of incidents in the local middle and high schools here where the girls were caught doing just. It has always boggled my mind that girls would do that in an attempt to make a guy like them. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/29/2007 1:32:42 PM | I enjoyed it and anticipate another,,,
Hey why don't you next time have him show you how much he enjoyed it by going down on you??
Why don't you women weed out the guys that love to BS about how good they are about giving oral sex and of course they get a BJ out of the deal and then leave you high and dry.
If he enjoys going down on you and making you feel great and not expecting anything else then it might not be such a bad idea.
That way you know he doesn't just want a BJ he wants to make sure you know how much he cares about you feeling good. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/29/2007 1:43:16 PM | [I frequently do give head on the first date, provided I enjoyed it and anticipate another]
[Is that not sex on a first date? Maybe I should start a new thread asking 'what is sex'?]
I'd say sexual yes, but NOT sex. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/29/2007 1:54:10 PM | [And what do you get out of it? Just the hope that they'll take you out again? ]
No not the hope that they will take me out. But I've been through phases where I was uptight, others when I did have sex on first dates regularly because it "felt good" at that specific time. I don't consider it sex, and I think if a man has taken the time to plan a good evening, and show me a good time, why should'nt I show him one in return? Yes it is more sexual than kissing, but most guys enjoy it more than a good night kiss. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/29/2007 1:54:51 PM | Dolly Honey - two consenting adults - secure in the fact that
the possibilty for this may be just the one night - and they are
okay with this - God Man - why am I answering this-
I have no f**king clue-
Im going to go with - No - dont do it - save it for another date-
I dont know - seriously - If I find myself in this situation I will come
back and let you know-
Oral sex on the first date -Wow - I will climb back up to my tower now- | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/29/2007 2:00:26 PM | Hey allshookup98 thanks for the advice, but its not as practical as I often don't go in, or invite him in, and I don't intendd to hike my skirts up in fromt of my building.
Nor do I really feel any desire for the performance of a sexual act upon ME. I do it bacause guys like it, and it doesn't hurt me any. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/29/2007 2:19:08 PM | I hear ya prityhot I'm just so much of a giver myself and a lot of times I will go down on a woman without asking for anything else. That way she understands that I'm not just in this for myself. And that kind of thing no matter how much I like to do it is all about her.
It just gets to me the way guys always expect something because it gives the rest of us a bad name.
JMO | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/30/2007 1:44:51 AM | Prityhot
I'd say sexual yes, but not sex
Firstly, I wasn't criticizing you. I started this thread and I have had many abusive posts from people on here that somehow thought it acceptable to do so just because I have experienced sex on a first date (and enjoyed it I might add... should get me another load of abuse). But let's not beat around the bush here...
Blow job = oral sex = sex. My question wasn't specific, I did not ask about penetrative sex. Oral sex is just as intimate as penetration. When I give sexual health advice to my patients... oral sex is included very clearly. This is an especially potent message I give to my young people, I don't want them thinking oral sex is not sex and I let them know it has almost as many health risks if unprotected.
Good for you if that's what you enjoy though and thank you for sharing that. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/30/2007 4:00:35 AM | If you're looking for a "right" answer for this, i'm afraid you're going to be disappointed. It's one of those subjective subjects and opinions are going to be diverse. After the fact, some men won't jump to conclusions while others will be wondering if you spend your spare time directing paris hilton's sex tapes. Just accept it.
For me personally, your conduct outside of sleeping on the first date is more of a reliable source on weather i should or shouldn't respect u. Just the fact of you sleeping with someone on the first date isn't really enough information for me to judge u either way. Did you pay for dinner before u so shamelessly seduced me? Did you forgive me for tuning into a great football game that just came on at the bar? :P Those kinds of things are more telltale signs.
Anyway, if i were you, i would personally decide what's right for me and come to peace with that then live my life while withstanding the criticisms some ppl will generously offer me. Hope my gibberish helps. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/30/2007 4:23:51 AM | | Prityhot do you have a telephone number where I can grill you further about this?!! Purely for research purposes only donchano!!!pmsl | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/30/2007 4:42:21 AM | Reply to jokster 79....
Thanks for the post -
I was never looking for answers - I am very comfortable with what I will or won't do and who with.
I was just curious of other's opinions on the subject of sex on a first date - I never wanted advice or opinion about me as I've said in many a previous post. Thanks anyway though! | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/30/2007 6:24:29 AM | From my own context what really matters is the satisfaction both enjoy in the love tango!
Whether its a bad move is never my wrongdoing cos if a man and a woman need the sex on that spot there is no need of compromising it.
I will never underscore such lady for doing that i will appreciate it like taking best breakafast!
sounds nice! | |
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tan2
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Joined: 3/1/2007
Msg: 215 | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/30/2007 1:27:23 PM |
Thanks for the post -
I was never looking for answers - I am very comfortable with what I will or won't do and who with.
I was just curious of other's opinions on the subject of sex on a first date - I never wanted advice or opinion about me as I've said in many a previous post. Thanks anyway though!
you welcome and thx for clarifying.... i saw only the first few post before replying. I've quite the itchy finger and although you may not appreciate it, my vice-president does.
Anyway, to clarify my own post. I didn't mean for it to be taken as you should do this or that. More so i was just expressing how i tend to think in that situation. Also i was giving my perspective on your very first post where you wrote "part of me does care how i'm perceived"
I can see how it might have come off as advice but really it wasn't intended as so. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/30/2007 2:39:35 PM | That's ok Jokster
By the way
Did you pay for dinner before u so shamelessly seduced me? Did you forgive me for tuning into a great football game that just came on at the bar?
I'd be far more likely to watch a football match in a bar than seduce anyone | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/30/2007 6:08:54 PM | Yeah - I think it's a bad move. Establishes the relationship on the wrong foundation, and personally I feel takes the fun out of dating. Mind you - I'm sure that sometimes the relationship will work however it starts because you're just right for each other - so who knows.
Not really a black and white issue, but my preference is to wait, enjoy getting to know the person, and then deciding whether to take the relationship further, and I must admit, I have a lot less respect for people who do have sex on first dates, as it just seems to basic, unintelligent, crass and SUCH a cliché. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/30/2007 9:56:19 PM | Sex on first date is not bad, unless the sex is bad. Whats wrong, whats right? Who knows, who cares. In my opinion people aren't sluts if they have some self respect and don't use sex for hidden agenda, like gain popularity and acceptance, trap someone, do it to get something over the other person, manipulate someone, if you use sex to get something else.
If everything goes good and people feel a connection so soon then what is a wrong with sex on first date? I don't see anything wrong, you both need to be in the right mindset going into it, thats all. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/31/2007 11:20:56 AM | | There is nothing wrong with sex on the first date. In fact I prefer sex on the first date. I don't like to wait. I'm not interested in a serious relationship anyway . No strings attached. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/31/2007 11:33:29 AM | In my opinion people aren't sluts if they have some self respect and don't use sex for hidden agenda, like gain popularity and acceptance, trap someone, do it to get something over the other person, manipulate someone, if you use sex to get something else.
Exactly Jared. If you're out to have sex, hopefully enjoy it, and don't attach any 'strings' or expectations to it, then fine, do it. As long as you understand that it may not (or may) lead to more, and if not thats ok with you, hey, you're an adult. "no strings attached" (NSA).
What gets people hurt in these situations, mostly, is *their own expectations*. Its only a "bad move" if you put a lot of expectations on what it means and get hurt because of your own expectations. And then you need to realize that *they* didn't hurt you, you hurt yourself because of your own expectations. Takes *two* to have sex, if you are placing expectations on what it means, thats on you. | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/31/2007 4:17:37 PM | To: Mess. 190
"hmm...so what happened? It still ended?"
Did you ever hear of the saying,"All things must pass?" In the begging everyone believes it's gonna' last forever. At least she had 15 years of love, from what I sense in her words, I never had I'm happy for her. Besides, why don't you tell us of your long term relations, that lasted 15 0r more years without sex on the first date, so we can compare? :~( kenny | |
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| Sex on a first date? Is it a bad move?
Posted: 3/31/2007 4:34:20 PM | To:jokster 79
All human conversations and debates are subjective and diverse. That's why they are what they are. Jump right in man!! :~) kenny | |
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