| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 3/20/2007 11:12:00 PM | This is the hard cold facts!!!! You have to stop being nice....and tell him out right! Then if that doesnt work you ignore him! Then if it still doesnt work block him or change your ##! Believe me I have had my share of stalkers.. and I was nice to! But there is a time to start playing hard ball you know! its the only way! Hope this helps you! | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 3/21/2007 5:13:08 AM | I was once faced with the hard cold facts.
I realized things were bad.
I had to stop being nice. I needed to get mad.
Then I heard a voice...
"I don't have to tell you things are bad."
RUH? (Scooby -Doo voice)
"Everybody knows things are bad. "
Ruh rue ?
"It's a depression. Everybody's out of work or scared of losing their job. The dollar buys a nickel's work, banks are going bust, shopkeepers keep a gun under the counter. Punks are running wild in the street and there's nobody anywhere who seems to know what to do, and there's no end to it. "
"We know the air is unfit to breathe and our food is unfit to eat, and we sit watching our TV's while some local newscaster tells us that today we had fifteen homicides and sixty-three violent crimes, as if that's the way it's supposed to be. "
"We know things are bad - worse than bad. They're crazy. It's like everything everywhere is going crazy, so we don't go out anymore. "
"We sit in the house, and slowly the world we are living in is getting smaller,
and all we say is, 'Please, at least leave us alone in our living rooms.
Let me have my toaster and my TV and my steel-belted radials
and I won't say anything.
Just leave us alone.' "
"Well, I'm not gonna leave you alone. I want you to get mad! I don't want you to protest. I don't want you to riot - I don't want you to write to your congressman because I wouldn't know what to tell you to write. I don't know what to do about the depression and the inflation and the Russians and the crime in the street. "
"All I know is that first you've got to get mad. "
You've got to say, 'I'm a HUMAN BEING, Goddamnit! My life has VALUE!' So I want you to get up now. I want all of you to get up out of your chairs. I want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell,
'I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!' "
I want you to get up right now, sit up, go to your windows, open them and stick your head out and yell ...
- 'I'm as mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore!'
"Things have got to change."
But first, you've gotta get mad!."
.. You've got to say, '
I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!'
"Then we'll figure out what to do about the depression and the inflation and the oil crisis. But first get up out of your chairs, open the window, stick your head out, and yell, "
and say it:
"I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!"  | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 3/22/2007 1:22:30 PM | | If you say no and stop flirting and looking all starry-eyed at him, then everything is really clear. But it just becomes a terrible mess when do not want to be involved with someone but still find yourself incredibly attracted to that person (physically, intellectually, and emotionally). I've been on both ends of this fire and air dance and it really hurts all the way round. A bucket of water always helps. | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 3/22/2007 1:43:01 PM | You gotta just cut the person off and become a broken record when they do manage to get through. It happened to me recently, believe it or not - I had been talking to this young lady for a while but eventually got sick of her constantly making dates and then breaking them without so much as a phone call. A couple of times she'd managed to talk me into giving her another chance but eventually I just said "forget it".
That's when the phone calls started. Eventually I just turned off my cell phone (voice mail is a wonderful thing). Yea, I'd have two dozen messages when I turned it back on, but so what? Just delete them all. No different than E-mail spam, and you have about as much control over it.
The few times she did manage to get me on the phone, I'd either just hang up on her or, more usually (I'm too polite) I'd just say "I don't want to talk to you anymore. Please stop calling me.", *then* hang up.
Sometimes it takes a while. This girl was as persistent as they come without crossing into stalker territory... but when the only conversation they can get out of you is "don't call me. *click*" they give up eventually.
Yea, it's an inconvenience, but you really gotta learn to not sweat the little things. Save your energy to get worked up over things that matter, not some twit what can't understand "no". | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 3/23/2007 10:38:14 AM |
i hate guys that make them selfs to avalible ya know
Why not just say, "I'm not interested hun, thanks for your message."
What I hate is when you talk to someone, make plans, plans get cancelled, you don't talk for a week, you call them once or twice, leave a voice mail, no return call. Then at 10 pm one night you get a message saying come and meet me here or there. Yeah, that's a great idea. let me drop everything for you on a moment's notice...
How about you making it clear that either you are or are not interested in getting to know more about someone right off the bat. Makes things a lot simpler. I have a busy schedule too, I hate having my time and energy wasted and/or disrespected. I don't do it to others.
There's nothing wrong or mean about telling someone they aren't what you are looking for. I would perfer it to getting the run around. It's pretty easy to tell that when you send an email and get a (read/deleted) it's not as easy when you get a phone number and then play phone tag for three weeks. You don't know what's up then... they're busy, they're seeing 14 other people and need to find a place in the schedule for #15. They're bored, but shy. It's not them in the picture. Who knows?
Easy solution, say what you think. | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 3/23/2007 11:03:29 AM | | This whole "he's just not that into you" thing is baffling to me, but I just recently re-entered the whole dating thing! WHY oh WHY is it so difficult to tell where you stand? Anyhow, I find the games exhausting myself. He emails, calls, we date, he emails, now nada for a few days, so where do I stand? It's weird! | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 3/23/2007 11:12:07 AM | Regarding e-mail contact: unread/deleted buttom, block settings.
Regarding ph call, among other options:
- you are a recovery lesbian and the program is not working.
- your parole office doesn't aprove the contacts.
- you got drunk and are pregnant. | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 3/23/2007 12:18:46 PM | | seems to me that simply being honest and admiiting that youre not attracted is the best way to slove the situation. I would want that courtesy extended to me as I would be honest to say how I felt, after all isnt that what is required---- some honesty????? | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 3/23/2007 1:23:50 PM | After telling them you are not interested in a polite way, and the e mails and such just keep coming, simply do not read their e mails anymore. Delete BEFORE reading and move on. If they keep sending, keep deleting. You are keeping control, not them. They will stop. Do not under estimate the power of the delete key.
Yea... its a lil harsh but they are ignoring your requests and politeness so now you gotta do what you gotta do. delete, delete, delete.
peace | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 3/23/2007 4:39:30 PM | if he calls you more than a couple times a day and you didn't answer either one so he texts you a bunch of times, which you again don't answer, so then the emails start just tell him he needs help and he will not get it from you because that is not normal.
i had a guy who called and left 12 mess. texted me 12 time i answered none of them and then he emailed me 13 times. i saw all of this when i got to work the next day, left my phone there. told him he was phyco and not to call me again. if it isn't that bad just tell him your not interested or that you met someone else.
by the way this post was much more readable thanks and good luck. | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 7/21/2007 6:54:29 PM | Well I guess, no one is immune to the veils of a woman. I have been writing to a woman for a quite awhile (Bubba knows who), and she would read each of them when she was in the pond. Now it seems my hopes have been dashed. She is still not responding and has even deleted all my messages. So I spose that is a big enough flag for me. I know its a roll of the dice when you try to be the best looking Peacock, to gain the attention of a woman you desire.... Who really knows why the heart leaps for some women, and only pounds for others. Women kow what I am talkin about, when they see a guy.... one can make them weak in the knees, and others just numb.
I think I'll get a whole new set of pics....  and fish only once a week.... Life is more important than 17 inch screen.  | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 7/21/2007 8:36:04 PM | Hmm, I would have thought the grammar and dubious spelling coupled with the general inability to string together a coherent sentence would have sent the chap running...but apparently not!
There is such a thing as block user. If the user is "real life," pepper spray and a quick, swift kick in the groin usually get the message across.
(Sorry, but text talk is a huge pet peeve of mine.) | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 7/21/2007 9:36:35 PM | Choices are:
If you don't want to feel like you are hurting him- - - - -
"I'm going to be taking some me time and won't be dating at all in the unforeseen future"
"I am moving to Minnesota, it was a spur of the moment thing, I just love Walleye"
"Im converting to become a monk or a nun, whatever you got"
"The doctor says I MIGHT be ok in ten or twenty years, but for now I live in this bubble"
If you just want to get rid of them- - - -
"Hey do you know what this rash could mean? My other boyfriends seems to have it too"
"I lost my most recent court case, back to the clink for me, good news is I will get to see some old friends"
"Do you know what the proper post-op dosage is for estrogen?"
"Do you know what the proper pre-op dosage is for testosterone?"
Now if those don't work you can simply say "Honestly, your a great guy, but not what I am looking for right now in my life. I am just looking for something a bit different"
Now either way if the guy digs you he's going to get hurt, how hurt is going to depend. But it sounds like they don't get it at all, so the above last message mixed with one of the funnier ones might just get it across. If it doesn't stop, simply do what others have suggested and block them. Its tough "love" but if they won't listen to reason and nothing else seems to work, including my brilliant quotes above  it might just be time for drastic measures. | |
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Ender
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Joined: 2/1/2004
Msg: 90 | |
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| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 7/21/2007 11:47:57 PM | Hey Sassie,
This whole "he's just not that into you" thing is baffling to me, but I just recently re-entered the whole dating thing! WHY oh WHY is it so difficult to tell where you stand?
The thought just occurred to me that maybe what's confusing is that we're used to thinking about dating and relationships as a smooth progression toward greater and greater intimacy. But I know that for me it really isn't that way. One day I'm all for forging ahead. The next day, I'm freaked out because I went too fast. The day after that, who knows?
It would be nice if we understood our own internal signals well enough to anticipate them and let the other person know where they stand, but from one day to the next I don't always know where I stand within myself! Sometimes, it's all I can do to report my current state. Sometimes, I'm too mixed up even to do that. Sad huh! 
I'm beginning to think that building a relationship isn't so much what happens between the two people, as what happens when the two are separated. If I'm making myself crazy when the person I'm wooing isn't responding as expected, things are going to get bad pretty quickly. That's also true if I'm faced with the prospect of someone who gets panicky because I've had to go crawl in my cave for a day or two.
No. It's not a straight line from strangers to the altar (or wherever we might be headed together). It's fits and starts. Someone someone who can maintain a sense of warmth and humor about that is a true find.
All the best,
Robert | |
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CTR916
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Joined: 11/27/2006
Msg: 92 | |
| ~How Long Before Guys Get The Clue.??!~
Posted: 7/22/2007 1:35:52 PM | So, what ever happened to our (us guys) fragile male egos you chicks were supposed to be deliberately ambiguous about?
Why can't you chicks be nice and simply turn him on to one of your girlfriends to change his mind about a longer term relationship with you? Nice girls would. | |
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