| so, about me
Posted: 3/23/2007 8:31:31 PM | [People can say all the things they want about the topic of "intellect" but when you dig deep down, when you look past what people say so they don't have to look bad in public and watch how they behave and what they value - it's just beauty and money in the end.]
-Actually, people who bother to look "deep down" tend to see more than someone's bank balance or outward appearance... but that would preclude someone having a certain amount of depth...
Along with that would most likely come the realization that not everyone values the same things.. | |
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/23/2007 9:19:49 PM | Gordimus,
what's shakin'...lol I wonder if you're still even reading this thread since it's seemed to have drifted off into something a bit off the wall to say the least...
listen bud, you did get a bit of good advice in here...you really have to sift thru it mind you, but there is a gem or two in here for you.
msg 44 from grifone has much in the way of merit...just be careful there in his step 3 about touching people...i wouldn't go getting all touch feely with people if it's not your style...but he's absolutely right about lookin' good helps you feel good...if you're makin' a bit of bread watch for the catalogues and pick yourself up a couple of pairs of pants and some shirts for the summer...business-casul type stuff can help you in almost any situation you're going to be in...you can go nuts one saturday...take your sister or someone who knows a bit about clothes...and it never hurts to pay the extra ten bob or whatever over there to get the pants cut by a tailor so they fit nice and snug...don't bet for a sec' that a chick doesn't notice what you're wearing, she may not let on, they're real good at that part, but, they take note trust me...maybe a nice sportscoat to walk to work in and whatnot..clothes make the man brother...
and no offense to grifone, but i've never tested his body language flirtation theories, but maybe you might want to be better leaving that for next year when you're ready to enroll in the advanced class...
now...here's an idea you can run with, don't run with it, whatever...and it kind of hitchhikes off of StillP in his post #59...put yourself out there, have some fun and smile...i bet you got a good smile there...now when i was your age i wasn't gettin' too much if you know what i mean...but we're not going into me here, we're going into you...
so focus on something you yourself asked here, but amidst all the ruckus it was never answered i don't believe. You wondered if there was something else in your profile you should work on...and there is...always focus on your strengths in life. You're bright, you seem quite refreshingly genuine, (much like i was at your age...lol), you got a good smile, don't listen to that chick that said you're ugly...i've seen uglier guys get laid staedy...and you're a wee tad dorkey-shy, but, you're a monster bud...you're 5'11" and you like to consider yourself into fitness...goodstuff...
my chum had me join a healthclub with him when we both got promotions to a new city right when i was about your age...he liked the weights...i liked the running and the crunchies...we both liked the squash and the aerobics, and we both loved the scenery...and let me tell you something...if you just lay in the weeds and be the shyguy you are and join a co-ed aerobics class...and start attending regular as rain...you may find it to be an extremely rewarding and gratifying locale to fulfill some of your needs...
but just lay low though and get into shape...you'll start getting some hits...girls like the quiet guys...especially when they're 5'11" and lean and mean after 6 to 8 weeks of aerobics...eventually you may have to quit the club as things can quickly escalate out of control...especially if you're being a bad boy...lol...
but find a bud to go join a club with and use it fequently...once we were in halfvast shape, we'd go play squash for an hour, run for a bit, do the 60 minutes hi-intensity aerobics class, go bag out in the sauna, have a salad and some juice with your bud after the workout and compare notes on who's checking who out,but just lay low, sit in the weeds lad, go home, get up go to work and meet your bud at the club and away you go...pretty soon some real cuties are going to be smiling at you at the water fountain, saying hi gordy...some will nonchalantly bump into out in the parking lots after the workout...it's all really just a blast...lol...and have yourself just a super duper summer!
ps oh yes, get back to me on post 65 gordimus regarding bobruined the dates advice...lol | |
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/24/2007 8:04:03 AM | LOL @ this thread. I think TDQ is a troll, probably anything but a hot 21-year-old girl working in HR in SF.
Only thing on the looks/money thing: There are LOTS of good-looking women on this earth and probably a lot of guys who are stable and can afford a certain type of date... but beauty and money are only intriguing for so long.
With people staying single longer, I think a lot of people who still have relative youth (late 30s and younger, older if you take care of yourself) are over the fascination with looks/money they probably had when they were 21.
Basically there are quite a few single "hot" people, even childless, who are over "hot" people, still in the dating pool but are in the "Post-Gotta-Get-Me-A-Hottie" stage mentally. That throws off the TDQ perception of the world because the desires of these people are unpredictable... OK maybe TDQ is 21, because I would have never guessed at 21 that there was a Post-Hot stage but at 29 I'm a couple years into it and so are most of my friends that are my age. | |
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| so, about me
Posted: 3/24/2007 9:15:07 AM |
You can lead an intellectual to a forum but you cant make him spell intelligent !
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/25/2007 6:10:27 PM | bob,i ve just had the opportunity to read the quote and the topic seems to refer to this,
The purpose of this study was to understand and analyse the meanings given to caring of patients on the isolation ward by nursing students, focusing particularly on the aspects of communication and interpersonal relationships. The data were collected from individual interviews with 18 nursing students who were performing nursing practice on the isolation ward. The results, analysed and interpreted according to existential phenomenology, describe the structure of the phenomenon 'taking care on the isolation ward' from a relational perspective. The students described their difficulties and anxieties, as well as their willingness to take care of isolated patients, resulting in the overcoming of obstacles and in contacting and becoming involved when taking care of these patients.
what has this got to do with your quote,thanks | |
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/25/2007 6:31:18 PM | Intelligence isn't the turnoff. Intelligence with computers is only 1 kind of intelligence. From my experience with these batch of guys (bfs, dates, friends, parters of friends, etc), they fall into some patterns that make them more "stereotypical" as one set of intelligent group. So what is that stereotype? Well, many are introverts or quite shy - they are uncomfortable chit-chatting, taking risks, leading a social event, or mingling. Those are all skills that everyone can improve and work upon - so it's not a deal breaker. Many of those guys tend to only talk about one or two things (and too often, it's work-related, especially if there's at least 1 other such person around). You've got to be able to converse on a lot of topics - from politics, to TV, to movies, books, morality, philosophy, etc. In other words, don't just feed into what's interesting to you, brach out to create a bigger net of interest.
Lastly, intelligence has nothing to do with common sense and emotional maturity. Many intelligent men (FACT) have tremendously poor common sense (aka "absent-minded professor syndrome). Becoming aware of habits or behaviors means you can change them.
Good luck. | |
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/26/2007 12:35:13 AM | Perhaps one should define intelligent before discussion if it is a turn OFF or ON.
The answer lies within one's perception [definition] of intelligence.
FootNote: the Brain is the most sensual organ [that is, the one above the shoulders]. | |
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/26/2007 12:31:27 PM | OP: Maybe it's not so much your intellect as it is the way you broach the conversations? I'm not saying that's the case, but I do know several "smart" people who tend to come off as condescending. They don't do it on purpose, or even realize they are doing it. When people get to know them they realize it's just who they are and accept them for it.
Maybe that's ALL you talk about... and that can sure be a turn off. Or maybe your doing ALL the talking... and that's a turn off.
Bottom line: I'm gonna say it's got very little to do with them being turned off by your intelligence... and more with the presentation.  | |
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/26/2007 1:21:17 PM | | I find intelligent guys to be quite the turn on... After all, I need someone to give me a run for my money at jeopardy, but you better be good!! Looks and everything else physically can fade and change, so to be able to have a great conversation about many different worldy topics is oh so important... I believe intelligence comes in all different forms and appears in many ideas... but to me intelligence and intellegant conversation are required;) | |
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| so, about me
Posted: 3/27/2007 4:57:41 AM | - it's just beauty and money in the end.
Sounds like a personal problem, but you're entitled to believe whatever makes you sleep better at night.
Wishing you the best
I never did get an answer to my question: "how much $ ?" | |
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| so, about me
Posted: 3/27/2007 6:02:12 AM |
I never did get an answer to my question: "how much $ ?"
how much would it cost to create and operate a shelter for abused horses and women?
take the estimated amount, double it and you have your answer.
intelligent people realize that money can create so much more than simply a nice wardrobe and a 2-story colonial in the 'burbs. | |
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/27/2007 1:46:58 PM | | Not the simplest of questions to answer. It's never just one thing which can turn a woman off a man, nor turn her on. Does saying I find intelligence in a man attractive mean that if a man is intelligent i will therefore be attracted to him.? No! Have you asked any of these women why they have responded negatively to you? | |
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/27/2007 3:54:06 PM | | I don't want a brainiac, but neither do I want a brain-I-lack. I am very attracted to a man who is bright and curious and has a clever wit. But he must also have a warm and generous and tender heart. | |
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/27/2007 5:25:39 PM | Hehe nah I'm inteligent and get lots of offers and got the best one yet just recently, gorgeous she is and very sweet.... Mwah Huni... | |
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1john1
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Joined: 3/17/2007
Msg: 145 | |
| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/29/2007 12:19:44 PM | I think it was Sylvia Plath who said
"you can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think"
applicable to both genders of course. | |
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1john1
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Joined: 3/17/2007
Msg: 147 | |
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| so, about me
Posted: 3/29/2007 7:29:47 PM | | Or 'too' for that matter. | |
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| so, about me
Posted: 3/29/2007 8:27:36 PM | | A brilliant man who is humble yet passionate about his beliefs/ideas, is one of the sexiest phenomenas the universe offers. Truly, intelligence is close to the top of my wish list. ;-) | |
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| Are intelligent guys a turn off?
Posted: 3/30/2007 7:06:53 AM | At dancingqueen:
You say that intelligence is not a commodity yet in your profile you seem to make it as though it's number 1 on your priority list (even though it clearly isn't judging by what you post) by trying to measure a man's intelligence on a few levels through some "tests"
let me quote:
"if you email me, you have to tell me five things, in detail, that you learned about dating and relationships that you wished you knew before. If you don't, I won't reply. This is so I can figure out who has taken the time to read my profile or not. It also gives me an idea about a person's emotional maturity based on their answers and what kind of impression they are making (i.e. spelling errors, grammar problems, etc)"
"I'm more likely to respond to someone who takes the time to write a thoughtful email that says something interesting and is being honest with me. I'm also more likely to respond to people who have well maintained profiles. Someone who has twenty spelling errors in their profile isn't just saying something about their spelling; it's saying something about their character"
Is this all a front of some kind? Life is too short to be PC i thought? If a man's ability to earn $$ is the most important thing... how come your not engineering "tests" to find out how much he makes? or what kind of car he drives? I'm almost positive you have already come up with them.. i'm just surprised you didn't use them in your profile instead of all these "useless" tests to gauge a man's intellect (emotional intelligence, spelling, creativity, grammer) since it seems being able to provide is so much more important to you.
Hire a good lawyer and sue whoever you hired to write your profile for badly misrepresenting who you are. :P | |
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