| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/3/2007 2:35:05 PM | maryrachelle, why would you look at a guy a little strange if he cried at a movie????...????
people of both sexes cry at movies all the time!
i cannot even begin to understand this... | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/3/2007 2:56:01 PM | | It takes a strong man to not be afraid to show his emotions and sensitive side. Pfftt...weakness...what a load of B.S. Judging from the previews I am already prepared that I will shed a few tears watching that movie. Heck, Extreme Home Makeovers tugs at my heart and tear ducts every time I watch it. If that bothers a woman, then she isn't the one for me and I am not the one for her. If a woman sees it as a weakness she has the problem, not me. | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/3/2007 2:57:40 PM | | Don't feel bad...I think men should show their emotions more...and I hate to think what she's teaching her children (especially if she has a son). If a guy did that to me, I'd take it as a sign that something's not right. If you really like her and want to tough it out, be careful. She might have some issues she needs to work out OR she could be a major screw up. Unfortunately, we never know until we're in too deep. Good luck. | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/3/2007 3:02:10 PM | | yeah yeah i know i am all emotionally all plugged up . some day i am just going to blow and little pieces of me will be all over . not even as a little kid have i ever been much of a cryer. only time i ever saw my dad cry was when his brother died . its just how we are in my family we dont cry in front of other people much . there have only been a few exceptions in my life where i have bawled my eyes out in front of others . i never know what to do when someone starts crying in front of me . i know i should probly do or say something but its just not how i am . i get frozen when people do this. its just something that makes me uncomfortable. | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/3/2007 5:53:42 PM | | What a cow. It's okay for HER to cry (for no reason), but it's not okay for you to cry at an OBVIOUSLY emotional scene in a movie (I saw it, came out with mascara down my face). | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 8:09:32 AM | OP: While it sounds a noble gesture to feel bad for her when she cried on the phone it sounds a double standard that it is ok for her to cry but not for you to. Just because you are a male and she isn't doesn't make that alright. I feel that she has some serious issue that she needs to deal with in that and you need to really ask yourself if this is a woman that will accept you for how you are or is this the start of her finding fault with you instead? Yikes..A "red flag" warning seems to apply here.
When the movie Terms of Endearment came out one of my sisters said if you go and see this you WILL walk out of the theater calling it Tears of Endearment..she said there were VERY few dry eyes then. I went and saw it, walked out wiping my eyes and sniffling and so did MANY others, both genders and none were saying anyone was weak for doing that then. Also, when I saw the Passion of the Christ, I brought along a BOX of kleenex due to reactions I heard beforehand. Myself and my daughter were practically sobbing at one point and some woman next to us reacted the same so we took some kleenex then passed the box to her. The guy next to us was sniffling too and he seemed to be a "tough guy". I feel anyone that doesn't cry isn't living healthy as tears serve a purpose to help the body rid itself of some built up feelings that aren't good to keep bottled up inside. They clean out the eyes and can't if withheld. A natural response to someone crying is to sympathize. | |
|
| |
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 8:21:36 AM | yup this is the classic mutually exclusise attractiveness traits that men and women are always struggling with.
So many women look to thier "man" as a source of strength and support....they want you to exhibit those "traditional" qualities that a man should possess.
the funny thing is that a "strong" man has no problem showing his emotions...he does not fear his tears...now...this is where it gets complicated...as if you are reduced to a blubbering pile of goo...well most women will not be attracted to that...however a man who cannot cry or will not allow himself to is "emotionally" stunted.
In a case like this...well i would say..."good riddance to her"...there is nothing wrong with you...only with her.
Men have this too with women...where we want our woman to sexually open to fufilling all of our more "base sexual" desires...yet many men end up resenting or questioning a woman if she is ...with lines like "well if she did it for me shell do it for anyone"...its a bit of a catch 22.
personally ...i expect these type of things in a relationship...and so if they occurr (and they always do) its the reaction of you and your partner that determine wether or not the person you are with is worthy...as they can resolve thier own issues with the "ideal man/woman" and the "reality" of what we all are.
Honestly OP...thank the lord that she revealed her "closed mindedness"....even though im sure it wont be easy...let this one go...! | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 8:27:24 AM | My Friend,, it takes a secure man to cry,, that is not a weakness but a strenght,, and it is wisdom to know when to cry, and when to stand up and be strong.. I have to say,, if at some point in your life,, you bacame weak,, could she stand up for you,, I think not.. But by your words, I know you would and could for her,, so you deserve better..
Good luck Norm | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 9:27:58 AM | Hi...it's called "pathos"...it's about the only thing that really gets me into a copious mess. Artwork; literature (if you really want to clean out your soul, READ "The Bridge
to Terabithia" and "Sounder" to name two off of the cuff, TO YOUR KID); photography (this got me real good this past summer...in the news...caught me doubly
unawares when I later learned that I actually knew these people tragically affected);
music (those sad, silly songs: "Sugar Mountain"-Neil Young; "Whiskey Lullaby"-Brad
Paisley, to name two...); and, especially, films.
On the flip side of what effects who and how: imagine a female courting a male and
they're at a play revolving around two homosexual males, only to be the female wit-
nessing the male crying uncontrollably... when I had heard about this, I could not stop
laughing in her face! It was hilarity to me...
I have not heard a more truthful statement yet since the following; 'You can try to
predict how you'll react to a hypothetical situation. However, you do not know how you will actually react until you're right there and it's happening to you.' (- an awesome
psych prof) Love, Titus | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 9:38:15 AM | I've found that SOME women want a man to be sensitive ONLY when THEY think you should be and only cry when THEY think you should cry... Otherwise, you're a whimp!! SAD but TRUE!! Move on to a woman who TRULY wants you to show your own emotions.
 | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 10:13:58 AM | | for people who just dont understand sarcasm i was kidding about being emotionally plugged up and exploding into little pieces . i cry but i do so in private . not everyone is the same or is going to react the same . it seems though that you have all conveniently ignored the post from someone who knew the lady that the op was talking about . you are hearing only one side of a story after all . he could very well be telling us half truths or outright lies. | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 10:27:57 AM | you cried in public? what a wuss. a real man will NEVER cry in public. by himself at home, yes. hell, i did it when my dad passed away in 2000. but not in public. as for men crying and being a sissy? it's that feminist crap. it seems there trying to sissyfy the men and butch up the girls.
kenny | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 10:32:25 AM | I have cried in public many times especially when the accident has children involved,,,but on a lighter note: I cried when Homer left Marge,I'm happy to see they have worked things out. I cried at my sisters wedding!!! I was so happy for her. | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 10:37:36 AM | | I hate to say it, but it would be weird for me too - I might cry watching something, but never with anyone else present. Fair's fair - I don't think it's ok for me to cry either. I only cry in public when seriously injured, I see human suffering or if someone dies, and even then it's not comfortable for me. All other times I feel the urge to cry I find a place to go until it's under control. IMO crying shows weakness (for me anyway) - and no one else should have to deal with it; it's just the way I was raised. I had an ex once cry over something happening to one of his kids, and that was ok - but I would have been put off seeing it over like "The Notebook" or something ( not that I would watch that type of movie on purpose). | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 10:51:01 AM | To be honest...That would kinda freak me out to. Crying on a second date with a complete stranger is kinda weird. I dont think I would call you back either. Crying over the lose of a loved one is completely different from crying over a movie (on a second date) jeeze...get a grip. You blew it!. You probibly came off to her as an overly sensitive, emotional, needy whimp.
*Does'nt sound like she freaked. Freaking out is not what you described maybe turned off. | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 11:21:29 AM | | Crying shows compassion and anyone that feels that is not ok to show over something moving really lacks that in their character I feel. If one finds it odd then I would say they have the issue and not the one releasing a natural human emotion. I recently started dating someone, they told me that they lost their last gf (a while ago now) to an unexpected aneurysm and I felt like I wanted to cry for them in hearing this. It's the 21st century people, so why does crying have different rules for men and women? For crying out loud..to all those "creeped out" by it I say grow up and let people express themselves. I feel that ruling someone out over crying is another reason people are still not finding what they are looking for, too high standards to match up to. (Crying over something sad is different than that high pitched sobbing or bawling like a baby.That level of it can make anyone feel uncomfortable in how to react to it then.) | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 11:31:32 AM | I had to read your post a few times! Take this as an early signal..being at a movie and showing your emotions...that you need not waste another moment with this woman. Tears are not a sign of weakness, and I am moved to tears when I see a man moved to tears. It shows you have compassion, empathy, and courage..yes courage...to show this side of you even if it's brought on by a sad scene in a movie. When she started "sobbing", maybe you should have done what she did to give her a taste of her own medicine? Really listen to your gut on this one...is this really someone you want to keep spending time with and getting to know? If she feels this strongly so early on about men and tears, she isn't going to change. Even the strongest of men can't be strong all the time! How selfish and indignant for her to think that she has all rights to emotions that you don't? I'm sad that you have to experience this, but let it be a situation that you can learn from about who really is best for you. If you have doubts at all...walk the other way with your head held high. I wish you the best!  | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 1:12:05 PM | | oh jeez i hate it when you dont agree with someone and they say things like you lack something in your character or things similar to that kind of statement. crying over losing someone you love and over a movie is not the same kind of thing at all. its like comparing apples to oranges . everything has its time and place and if someone is so very sensitive that they cry at the drop of a hat i just cant deal with it whether its a man or a woman.we are not all the same and just because we all dont sit there and sob over sad movies doesnt mean there is something wrong with us . just because you do doesnt mean there is anything wrong with you either . people are just different. men generally react differently then women do to highly emotional things. if i dont sit there and cry over the least little thing then i would be very poorly matched with someone who does. that does not make me overly picky .we all cry and i have done my fair share of it but its the rare occurrence that i have bawled in public. even as a little baby my mom said i almost never cried .did any of you happen to read what another person posted who actually knows the woman who the op is talking about. something smells here. | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 1:26:41 PM | it's good to have a good cry...even native warriors know this...it helps cleanse the soul...mind you i wouldn't go bawling my eyes out in front of too many people as it can ceratainly lead one to be very quickly branded a crybaby
OP she sounds pretty cold...and remember what neil used to sing if you want her, "don't cry no tears around me"
i cry every time the jews give oscar schindler the gold ring they made out of old fillings...and i cry when anthony hopkins and brad pitt head over the trellace in meet joe black...and once a year i make my sisters have a good cry when i bring my copy of "it's a Wonderful Life" for Christmas..
call me a crybaby..lol. sticks and stones may (have) broke my bones, but words can never hurt me...
crying is an expression of an emotion, like smiling...try it sometime..it works. | |
|
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 1:46:49 PM | maryrachelle sad movies are sad they are intended to bring that emotion out in people and good ones are indeed very sad. Crying about it isnt over the drop of a hat. Theres also a huge difference between bawling your eyes out and shedding a few tears over something sad. Clearly the OP was not sobbing loudly or she wouldnt have asked him if shes crying. Theres nothing at all wrong with not crying about something sad or becoming teary eyed.
I was definetely raised never to cry but it doesnt bother me when I do a bit. | |
|
| |
CD76
|
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 73 | |
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 2:02:24 PM | Hey Man,
I got choked up at that scene too. That's her issue if she can't deal with it. It was a powerful scene and you would have to be kinda inhuman to not let it effect you! If she thinks your week for getting teared up...BEWARE! | |
|
| |
| I cried during a sad scene - and she freaked!
Posted: 4/5/2007 2:11:42 PM | | its not that i was raised to not cry it just seems that even when i was a little baby crying just wasnt something i did much . yes i know there is a difference between bawling your eyes out and tearing up . i was talking about people who cry over every little thing . i dont mean just sad movies i mean everything. this is how i am . i dont go around crying over things unless they are serious . its just how i am . i was not a baby that cried much or a toddler that cried much either. it just seems to be how i am made. i dont enjoy being around people who do cry over everything . anyway i am not going to justify anymore why i dont cry easily . some people dont and some do . its just a difference its no big deal. anyway i dont think the op is telling us the whole story something seems off. | |
|
Home
login 
