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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/14/2007 2:08:44 AM | You know, this thread is like the horrible ex that you keep coming back to, because when you're in the moment, it's just SOOOO tasty!
First and foremost. Branes; I bow to you for your wit, tact, candor and grace. I know it's contradictory, but so is life, as you know better than most. I just wish that it had been one of the women on here to show such class and strength of character.
On to the fun stuff!
Remmington; Dude, I HOPE that you're kidding, because as funny as that was ( and was it EVER funny ) if I ever wind up in that kind of dance with a woman again at least one of us is going into the river for good.
And as per usual, to all the banjo-strummers that can't see the humour, and all of the feminists that can't see the need for humor... Why don't you all date each other? It would sure cut down on the traffic and negativity on here, and you'd be bound to thin out the herd a little. Gotta be some kind of cosmic balance thing in that idea somewhere. Besides, the tales of such connubial bliss would have the rest of us laughing so hard we'd never be bothered with trivial irritations again.
Sorry I still haven't gotten the lists done. I'm not kidding when I say that I have to budget my time carefully up here to ensure 5 hours of sleep a day. I'll try to do better in the near future. Until then, keep on at each other, I couldn't buy this much entertainment at a carnival! | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/14/2007 2:34:31 AM |
First and foremost. Branes; I bow to you for your wit, tact, candor and grace. I know it's contradictory, but so is life, as you know better than most. I just wish that it had been one of the women on here to show such class and strength of character.
I'm sure if Brane's wife was here she could post a list for you...the difference here being Kbot...they HAD something that worked and jived so he has something to pull from...
Most of us cannot say that because we have never truly had that, all we have hopes, wants and dreams. His ended because of her passing, ours was breakups, there is a big difference in those two.  | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/14/2007 3:46:48 AM | | I am going to take a small step out here and hope not to get bashed. What ever happened to just asking? Why does the dating and getting together with the opposite sex always have to be a guessing game. Where did the old fashioned question go of asking someone who has asked you to get together, in what sense did you mean it- is it as a friend or is it to get to know each other better- and just let them know that - in asking, the person just wants to make sure that they know so that no missteps are made. Did being straight forward and honest go out of style?? This is how I see it--- and I don't expect that others will see it that way- it is just my humble opinion. There are so many that state no game playing. Does this not fall under that category in trying to make the other guess what you are thinking- and then be upset when they don't read your mind. Please be kind- I write in the most humblest way possible. I am just a kind person. I don't expect other to agree with me in total willingness. | |
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babs3
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Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 229 | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/15/2007 7:34:46 AM | (I've never posted before, so if this ends up quoting a huge block of text I'm sorry).
Simple things women think men should know:
- If you say you're going to call, CALL. I think that's a major pet peeve for most women. It's actually a rule not just for men, either. I get irritated when my friends don't call, too, because it's a part of my day I was expecting and it's just plain courteous. And many women will think you're not calling because you're not important enough to them (which I don't believe, I know they probably just got caught up watching hockey or being a closet drag queen or whatever it is they do on their days off).
- Being introduced to friends of yours, don't just leave me sitting in the corner of the booth at the pub without any way into the conversation. I hate hockey. I don't understand football, or what a fan belt is, or have any sort of opinion on whether the RX-7 is better in the 93 or 94 version (2 hours!), so if that's all you're going to do, please remember that I, and a lot of other women, will hate you for this. If the conversation leaves her behind, leave her night free to do something that won't be terribly awkward.
- Take care of yourself. I don't understand why so many men think it's 'girly' to use face cleansers and nail clippers/files. I'd rather see you IN A FACE MASK, MUD WRAP, AND WITH A MANICURE than come face to face with your pimples and dirty chewed nails :P At least attempt to get rid of them, because I generally don't want hands like that anywhere on me.
- Don't go out of your way to open the door. If I'm there, I'll open it.
- Remember my name. 'nuff said.
- If you can even vaguely sense you've crossed some comedic line, you probably have, so shut up before you seriously offend somebody. There are only so many gay jokes (in the actual sense of the word 'gay') that I can take before I want to seriously hit you with a brick. You never know how many friends a woman has who are of the denomination of people you are making fun of, so steer clear of things like that. I have a sense of humor up to a point, but seriously, the line. Figure out where it is and don't try to move it.
-This one is probably for very few women, but it's a big one for me, because I have piercings. I have 4 fresh piercings right now, and nothing makes me want to cry more than guys going "OOOOHHH SHINY!!!" and playing with them. Don't touch. They're fresh, open wounds, and it really should be common sense. This also goes for people on the street who think it's okay to touch complete strangers (  ), but mostly for dates.
- Every woman is not a contortionist. Again, 'nuff said.
- You don't have to like my pets, but if I EVER catch you dangling a piece of KFC into my rabbit's cage, it's not funny, and you will be out of my apartment faster than you can blink. Some things are cute, but I like my bunny alive, and when you're feeding him strips of that crap, I doubt that will last long.
- Learn to gauge when a woman will be ready for your date, and then get used to it. If she's expecting you at 6, show at 6, not 6:30 because you know she'll still be getting ready. Master twiddling your thumbs on the couch. By 6:10, she's probably wondering where the hell you are and stopped even being productive, so when you show up at 6:30, you're not only getting an irritated woman, you're also in for a 20 minute wait anyways. Although to note, I'm not one of those girls. I'll take 5 minutes tops to be out the door.
- Don't turn dinner payments into a huge deal. Insist 3 times at most, then shut up, the teller wants to hit you. Even if the woman thinks it cute - this is more about courtesy towards other people who have to listen to that annoying crap. Trust me, they want you to shut up, PICK A PERSON TO PAY, and then pay and get out of their way.
- Don't wear white shirts to first dates if you know you're a nervous person.
- Trim your nose hair if it's visible outside your nose. Really.
- Keep your place relatively clean. I'm definitely not a neat freak, but if somebody's coming over I take the time to at least tidy up.
Now, please don't waste all of our time by saying; "I don't/would never/haven't done that" you all have/do/and will at some point.
As for this, I'm a little bit insulted that you perceive all women to be that stupid. I haven't, don't, and would never do that. I'm a fairly balance person, I think, and I'm not so deluded as to believe a man should be able to read my mind.
That's all I can think of right now. | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/16/2007 1:22:54 AM | Taal, Kbot is gonna love the fact that you gave him a LIST! I did not read it in it's entirety but you went into details LOL You are going to be his new hero 
He is really going to love this:
I'm a little bit insulted that you perceive all women to be that stupid.
Just pokin a bit of fun at ya here to Taal but in all seriousness what you put here is what he is looking for me thinks. Glad you took the time to feed the beast so to speak.  | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/16/2007 8:34:58 AM | You should open doors
You should let her order dinner first
You should offer her your jacket if she is cold, she is probably wearing skimpy clothes to look good for you.
If she is dressed up - you should notice and say something... does not have to be over done, it could be as simple as 'are those new shoes?'
If she is acting standoffish, there is probably a reason, and it does not have to be pms... Ask her what's up, she may resist at first, but tell her that you want to be open and work through things, and if something is bothering her, it is bothering you. This will be good for both parties, cause a lot of women will let things stew and build up till they blow up, and that is not good for either party concerned.
You should look her in the eyes when she is speaking/ and she should return the favor.
You should reply with more than uh-huh, and right.
You should greet her with a kiss... don't make her have to come to you every time.
Some women like to hold hands - if that is the case, you should grab her hand sometimes
With that said, every woman is different and will have different quirks. Just pay attention and you should be able to pick up on it. Communicate with her. Ask her what she expects if she takes you to a family reunion (going back to the original question)
Communication and trust are the foundation for any relationship from brother to wife.
Side note: It would be nice if more guys remembered birthdays and special occassions... but that is just a bonus -
Hope this helps, or was what you were looking for. | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/16/2007 8:48:33 AM | | Sorry, I forgot to say that these things are just a matter of respect for your woman. They shouldn't be viewed as a hastle, or chore. She enjoys doing things for you - spending time picking out the right outfit, and doing the hair and makeup thing... So you can be proud to sport her on your arm... cooking dinner, planning a weekend camping trip... watching sunday night football, letting you always be in control of the remote.... buying and suprising you by wearing the little lacy lingerie - (that is totally for you!) Rubbing your shoulders if you have had a hard day... These are the ways that she repays you for your kindness and respect. | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/16/2007 12:16:05 PM | Ok to the OP.
Here's just one little thing that I had done and OMG I loved it..
I had a dinner date and didn't finish my meal, he actualy took the left overs and carried them for me.. It was Too Dam Cute !! He scored brownie points with that, and it was just a little silly thing..
Some times the little things mean alot, so try to remember that.. | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/18/2007 12:11:05 AM | Here's more :D
- Bathroom etiquette. If you're not going to put the seat back down, you damn well better not have gotten pee anywhere that isn't the inside of the bowl. You've been practicing your whole life - at this point, if you can't aim, sit down. If you miss, even a little bit, clean up.
- Respect personal boundaries. Just because a woman has had sex with you doesn't mean she wants to be constantly groped.
- Don't be a special-occasion only gift-giver, or a typical one. I hate getting flowers from men on any occasion, but especially on my birthday or Valentine's Day. It's the most generic, I-don't-pay-any-attention-so-I-couldn't-come-up-with-anything-better gift there is.
- So help me god, if I ever catch you in socks and sandals, we’re through.
- You may not like it – hell, I don’t like it, and I’m one of the alien freaks (AKA women) – but it’s a fact of coupledom, weekends are expected to be spent together. If you have other plans, or want to make other plans, just let them know. I’ve known far too many girls – and dated far too many guys – who call their S.O. on Friday night or whenever on the weekend and expect for them to be available, and then guilt them into making themselves available. It’s pathetic and annoying, so anticipate it and avoid it – casually drop it into conversation earlier in the week if they’re plans made ahead of time (Wednesdayish), or if they’re last minute, call her and say something along the lines of this: “Hey sweetie (or whatever stupid nickname you generally use to butter her up with), how are you? (that part is very important) Yeah, I’m just calling to see if you’re free tomorrow to hang out, because after my night with the guys tonight I think I’d like to spend the rest of the weekend with you.” Or whatever. As long as you don’t blow her off completely, or even suggest something for the next weekend, most of the overly-possessive girls – which you’re bound to meet a few of because I certainly seem to know all of them – won’t kick up much stink.
- Breasts are not radio dials. This information is essential to your survival, so if you didn’t already memorize it, write it on your hand if necessary.
- She probably tuned you out around “and this is the wrench you need for this pipe,” so stop talking and just fix the leak. Most women just don’t want to know – and yes, I know it’s a big gender-stereotype, which is why I said most. If you happen to meet a women who gives a damn about the exact mechanics of plumbing, bully for you.
- Rinsing is not washing dishes.
- In a restaurant, aim for your mouth, chew your food, and then swallow it.
- Be polite to waiters and waitresses. As it goes, a man is (or should be) judged by how he treats those who serve them, not those he sits with. You’re not getting another date with me if you’re rude to them, because I’ve been that person far too often to maintain any kind of respect for you after that.
- If I catch you ogling a woman in public, just own up. It makes you look like less of a tool. Perhaps some women prefer being lied to about this – I don’t. She clearly has a better ass than I do, and much bouncier breasts – hell, even I’m staring. So don’t bother trying to lie your way out of it, I’m not stupid and that’s what’ll make me mad. | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/18/2007 7:15:32 AM | I have to say that taal is right on the money about a lot of things. Almost everything she said applies to a lot of women that I know, and about half apply directly to me. ha~ great work Taal... most of these things come as common sense to a gal, but guys just really don't seem to pick up on it naturally. It is good that the op is curious.  | |
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vahbsc
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Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 240 | |
| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/18/2007 9:02:34 PM | he should have assumed it was a date because if it wasn't mostlikely she would have said just friends... some shit is platonic, but its always categorized as such. if the woman has a functioning brain and common sense, some don't.
i can't tell you the rules, every woman isn't the same. just be honest and courteous and the rest should be directed to you. if you get involved with a new woman, just ask her respectfully. if she assumes you should already know, she's the big dummy... | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/18/2007 9:45:36 PM | Yea well Taals responses were excellent I'll admit BUT they aren't numbered or in anyway recognizable and rememberable by us guys. We think like "uh oh #4 don't pee on the floor even just a little bit...."
Okay before I get shredded, I'm JUST KIDDING!!! Heck I have been married twice and I think I'm starting to get the hang of all the common sense stuff already hehehe. Nothing there was tremendously "Eye Opening" for me except perhaps the admitting Ogling thing, which I don't really do anyhow.
Kevin | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/18/2007 10:55:00 PM | Kbot07 - this may sound weird but here goes:
Rule #1 - communication - men and women are not mind readers - if something is on your mind - look in the other persons eyes, turn the game off (that was for my benefit as I am a sports nut) and talk slow, clearly and in English and tell each other what you want/need to talk about.
Rule #2 - set perameters on what is acceptable and what is not. Be honest, open and respectful.
Rule #3 - set time together because you want to spend time together - not because you "have to". That is such crap. Each of you should have a life, so you need to make time for each other - not be each others life.
Rule #4 - evaluate where the bus is going, if you are on track and if the intended destination is still mutual.
Rule #5 - be respectful, loving, kind, generous and considerate to each other.
Well, those are my rules................most men I have dated, usually do not have problems with them. | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/19/2007 12:27:32 AM | Be aware of my facial expression and tone of voice and body language, if you're not sure and you think you pick up something like the cold shoulder ask me about it.
Be direct and tactful with me as well as others.
Smile and nod your head when I'm talking to you.
Treat me like your best friend -
don't pressure for sex right away - work at turning me on
When you're with me stay present -
Smile... remember my children's names, let them know that you are interested in them as well.
Action + Words together = stability and that's what I seek
if you say you'll call then call - if you don't want to talk - just say hi and yes you can call me baby - babe - hon " Hi- insert special name here - thinking about you, but I gotta run, wanted to touch base "
I like feeling words like touch, soft, warm, hot,
send me a flower after our third date with a cool note like - smiling as I'm thinking about you.
I just want to know that I cross your mind - that you care.
Be honest but tactful about sexuality - what turns you on what turns you off
Above all else - don't break the connection by hiding, being silent, withdrawn - that feels like being left alone in the dark.
Be able to keep up the pace of intensity - if you suddenly get quiet after growing to the level of something mutually exciting - then I may feel rejected....women are socialized to be in tune with other people's emotions - we have to be, we are in general the caregivers.
This is personal preference so please ask, I guess you have to learn to read the person's unique body language - and don't compare me to other women when it comes to something like kissing or touching - there are certian things I like that other women don't and vice versa.
I like a man that's confident when he's out on a date with me - I feel like he's happy to be with me.
I hope I have been of help | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/19/2007 3:01:33 AM | Ooooooooooohhhh CRAP! I had no IDEA there were so many new posts...
I just answered the first one that I saw because it struck a chord of honesty and such...
Not that all of the bloodthirsty Viking crowd are going to buy that for a second...
Crud. All right, I'm reading, I'll get right back to you all in my own inimitable fashion. Word like that ought to buy me at LEAST a few minutes... But here was my response anyways. Love you all. Well, almost all. Well parts of some of you. In a certain light. With a water-bra maybe... Oh never mind. Be back soon!
Actually Dreamzcatcher, your reply was perfect, and beautiful.
Thank you.
And now for me asking you... what are your buttons that you think shouldn't HAVE to be explained?
Such as him NOT getting drunk and urinating in random places INSIDE of your home! I hear so many stories about this crap and it's almost ALWAYS from girls that are actually still with these jackasses that really should have been taken hunting at birth.
Sorry, pet peeve of mine, what can I say; piss in my home, die in it.
Have fun all. Oh, and Dreamzcatcher, in case you missed it; I AM asking, and here you get to put it out there for the world! Have at 'er!!! | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/19/2007 6:04:21 AM | All right.
I've read the replies, I'm thoroughly confused and incensed, now bear the wrath whot your wroth hath wrought!!!
God, it's so COOL that I actually managed to put that sentence together,
... whatever, I enjoyed it, YAY ME !!!
Seriously though, how the HELL am I supposed to know when one of you twits with tits is wearing new shoes? You little Egg-layers stash those things like men stash beer. For the same reasons.
Taas (?); Very witty, in about 18 months you'll be slaying men in even greater numbers than you lose purity points. Which is a grand thing by my lights.
Someone mentioned something about socks and sandals; fealt the same until I started living up here in Haida Gwaii. Some rules of fashion are location specific, I guess.
By the bye, any rules for dealing with an entire staff of women that are cheating on their BF's? I'd forgotten what resort-life was like. For that matter, I'd greatly appreciate an anonymous shipment of saltpeter, purely for artistic purposes of course.
Who would have ever thought that I'd be the voice of reason and integrity? Live and learn I guess. About time I made Mom proud. Then again, she's just waiting for me to croak, doesn't know that I've made a point of wearing out ALL my organs. | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/19/2007 6:04:55 AM | I suspect that inconsistent, accusitory, characterizing, manipulative female behavior exists because such behavior was necessary for survival from an evolutionary standpoint given the physical advantages men possessed. But you should have seen the reaction that speculation got the last time I paraded it.
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/19/2007 6:15:49 AM | Perhaps you ought to try parading it at Mardi-Gras? In New Orleans? Anyone that can afford that much tinsel to hide a twig would be prime-rib in such a desolated area.
Dude, just call a bytch a bytch, and get on with things. Or watch Mad Max back to back about 40 times. Then go to an all-you-can-eat joint before getting a rub&tug.
Not making fun, SERIOUS advice here, no reason to second-guess yourself.
We deal with enough of their crap to warrant damn near anything we want to delve into. So fill your boots, just remember that if you get caught and she doesn't join in that particular night, you're walking home to half a home in one bootie. | |
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| Okay! That's enough of the expected ESP BS! Rules are, please?
Posted: 6/19/2007 6:20:02 AM | So let me just say that everyone should just SAY what they MEAN and MEAN what they say....
With room to change your mind of course....
I've just come out of a situation where I felt like the guy was going overboard trying to initiate closeness, further involvement etc. When I finally made a move "forward" myself...He ran into the night tearing his hair out!!!
Here was a case of someone not only not TELLING me what was REALLY going on with him....But who seemed to be going OUT OF HIS WAY, to assure me of his continuing level of committment, and desire to further that committment, that was OBVIOUSLY the complete opposite of what was really going on with him!
I understand having a change of heart, or deciding after trying something that it's not for you, but I guess, I need to be told when that changes, verbally, to truly get the message...
I'm funny that way....
So yes, some things go without saying...but I really believe in if you can't TALK about it, then you shouldn't be DOING it, as a general rule.... | |
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Awww k-bot....don't be like that!....I thought I saw the humour in your posts!!!...remember....your the one who asked!!....good luck with that list....
