| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/16/2007 4:22:28 PM | | There is the women across the way.. who after her daughter was born .. was told her daughter would live to the age of 10...she is now 10 and is failling more and more everyday.. if that wasn't enough to handle.. 2 months before christmas her 7 year old son is complaining of pains in his leg...he was diagonised with the same cancer that killed.. terry fox...it has been 7 months now and he is still in the childrens hospital...she has one more child .. that she has to be strong for everyday.. plus the other one that she cares for around the clock...and the father of the kids not only not lending an support.. but living right next door with another woman .. who he has 9 months pregnant... she never complains.. says anything negative ..or even why me..... now that is a strong woman.. to be dealt all that ....and having to go through each day not knowing.. if it is the last she will spend with 2 of her children..... | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/16/2007 4:50:48 PM | to me a strong woman is someone who is vurtuous ,intelligent, and never plays a victim.Always owns up to their actions and is willing to admit being wrong.A strong woman of note..Joan of arc.
P.S. men are judged by the same measures. | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/17/2007 2:41:37 PM | | I think the term "strong woman" is a woman who would have to put up with a man in a meat flavored armchair... wreaking of beer, ~fish and chips~, and folded over ridiculous magazines. Her outstretched claws and arched back with swaying tummy and yielding eyes would tell a story of well, the better half of him... and let's face it, when her claws came out and she purred... what would he really be thinking... limp parsley or hooked for life? ~Uzi~ XXXXXXXXX PS Instead of shooting at the ego... I would have personally plucked that ridiculous LQQKing hair salad keeper and tossed it airborne pumping some lead shot through it | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/17/2007 3:53:14 PM | optimistically cynical, I agree with you entirely--despite my screen name--I am a woman--and yes, I did train several pair of oxen for my living history group--
To me, a "strong person" (male or female) is someone who knows who they are, and what they are--they have a knowledge of themselves, the world, the human race. They have a conscience, a set of moral values which they adhere to, they do what is right, even when it is unpopular, their word is true. Yes is yes, and no is no.
They walk softly and don't tread on others, they do not stand by when evil is to the fore, they are generous and help those less fortunate. That said, though, they do not have "door mat" on their back, they do not allow others to take advantage of their generous and giving nature--and if push comes to shove and they are backed into a corner physically or emotionally by an aggressive person or situation, they will come out of the corner with the ferocity of a mad mama baddger protecting her cubs if that is what it takes.
The perfect analogy of a "strong" person to me are the Great White Pyrenees dogs. They are huge, bred to protect sheep and goats in the mountains between France and Spain. They are the most GENTLE creatures in the world, and also the most FIERCE and will instantly sacrifice their lives for the flock without a second thought. Yet, they always use the MINIMUM amount of force necessary to quell any threat. Unlike many other "guardian" breeds of dogs, if the "threat" decided to give up and leave, the Pyr would escort it out of the territory and send it on its way, not continue to maul it.
The strength to me in any person is a measure of their gentleness as well as their willingness to fight for what is right and good. | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/23/2007 6:41:52 PM | | RE post 51, that's an important distinction. Strength is not just about what you can do, but also what you can take. Life can be hard, to persevere with character in tact, that's real strength. | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/23/2007 7:01:27 PM | | strong women , strong willed, strong personality.....a woman who knows what she can control and what she has no control over. a woman who knows how to take care of herself and take care of those she loves against tremendous odds but still does the best she can... | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/25/2007 7:44:46 AM | icesphinx...what a spiritual and prolific description of a strong woman. I thought I was the 'quote queen'....girl do you have any thoughts of your own? As far as the CRAP WEASEL statement on one's occupation....you've never had to compete in the 'corporate board room arena with the 'bubbas' and OMG I have to have the 'kitten heals' because that situation in the south dictates that you be light on your feet. I wish we all had the luxury of a surreal spiritual existence, but for those of us in the arena....through the words of the mentors of our past, we actually go out into the harsher side of the world.....trying to make it better and setting an example for the youth of TODAY that if change is to occur...it starts with one person. In today's society, most necessary humanitarian changes that many of us are working towrds must be funded....it is exactly about a pocketbook, maybe not yours, but most global change is about money and you live in a country in where their are many people willing to invest in a cause. Who are you to assess their strength or lack there of because of their multifaceted lives. Those of us who actually have the added benefit of being well paid... have had to be strong in ways that you can't imagine. You have no idea of the sacrifices and strength that was required to get to a place where we could use our strength to make a difference and you can bet your birkenstocks that we have earned the right to be paid well. So cut the condescending CRAP WEAZEL and walk a day in my 'kitten heals'...you wouldn't last until lunch...oh I forgot that is not on the schedule most days. | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/25/2007 10:15:03 AM | SteelMagnolia, my mother was a "strong woman" in the 50s when she went to work in the corporate world--back when "the little woman" was at best a secretary--she worked her way up the ladder through the years, hitting the glass ceiling with her head every day..letting her male boss take the credit for her excellence...but she eventually got to the top and did it in a "lady like" manner, because if she hadn't, the glass ceiling would have cut her throat as she bashed her head through it. She was WISE enough to be "strong" and "not let them see it"--some folks call that "uncle Tom-ism" but it works if you are REALLY strong.
I grew up pounding at the glass ceiling with a hammer, until I finally learned that she was right. I am no less "strong" because I don't hammer at the glass ceiling which is still there for lots of "groups"--women, blacks, Hispanics, etc.--but I learned that you "catch more flies with honey than vinegar"--My mother was a very competent, intelligent woman and tenacious as well...she succeeded, and eventually I learned, like David will I hope, that just because I am smart, being young (at that time) I still had folks older than me who were not nearly as smart, but they had the experience and the "power" over me---so I had to learn to "play nice and get along" in order to gain my objective...and I did.
I also learned some other wisdom on the way too...people who use "POWER" over other to force them to do/think anything ultimately lose...you cannot "force" anyone to do anything...you may even have the power to kill them if they chose not to "bow" to your force & power, but if they are willing to face the consequences of refusing (whatever it is) you can't make them.
Having enough wisdom to "chose your fights" and enough wisdom to know the best way to fight, and therefore acheiving your objective to me is strength. Sometimes it is as obvious as a fist fight, and sometimes it is not obvious at all...but standing up for what is "right" against the whole world even...is strength. | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/25/2007 3:51:30 PM | Oxdrover...what an excellent story, and definitely one that I needed to hear...I worked last night until 11:30 and ended up on the forums trying to unwind. I posted to a similar thread not too long ago about the strength of southern women that is buffered by a sweet, soft spirit. You make many excellent points to this theory. I found a quote a few years ago that I still find prolific...."A strong woman will not allow anyone to get the best of her, however, a woman of strength gives the best of herself to everyone."
Thanks for the post. | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/25/2007 4:31:21 PM | Magnolia, my late husband used to tell me "No one every chissled on their tombstone, 'I didn't spend enough time at the office.' " I didn't listen to him as much as I should have because I, too, spent too much time at the office my whole life, taking on more responsibilities than I should have. About 2 yrs before he died, I took a 2-day-a-week JOB at half my fomer pay (leaving my career) and my mother, strong career woman that she was, asked me "Why?" I told her that I wanted to "spend TIME with my family and even my dog."
About 6 months later, my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer and needed me very much...then my husband was killed in a plane wreck here at our farm/airportAfter 3 months off, I went back to work those 2 days a week for about 3 months and finally said--what the heck am I doing here? I realized that I would NOT starve if I quit work--I could live frugally and still have everything in the world I wanted or needed and have UNLIMITED TIME to do what I needed and wanted to do.
I can look back too, and realize that my mom and dad needed the money she made (my dad was a school teacher) but I HATED day care and even when I was in highschool when she had 6 months off between jobs, I loved for her to be home when I got in from school. I had taken jobs when my kids were small that let me keep them with me, then made a career after they were older, and done very well in my career--but CAREER isn't EVERYTHING--money isn't everything.
The glass ceiling for women and minorities is there--sometimes it is worth it to work hard and penetrate it--other times even penetrating it you only get more money and less life--I'm not sure it is worth it. | |
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mizbex
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Joined: 4/22/2007
Msg: 65 | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/25/2007 8:51:22 PM | Strong Women I come from Strong Women and I am a Strong Woman My ancestors were on this US Soil before anyone from You Magnolias landed here...
So yes Light on my feet and proud of my moccasins!! | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/25/2007 10:15:44 PM | oh god not this again!
it means she has a fricken chip on her shoulder and although she claims to "not need a man" she soon will find out how wrong she is when things don't go her way, or in other words just a beeoootch! (in my opinon of course) | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/25/2007 10:47:49 PM | oxdrover you are truly a wise woman. The long hours, career, and income don't come close to compensation for a happy homelife. I am grateful for the flexible hours that come with my job. As a single mother with a special child it affords both the quality time with her that is essential as well as providing for her needs. I am also blessed to have my sister and nephew living with us....we have become a strong family unit...balanced in a world of chaos. I have worked in the same industry since college . During the last 20 years I've had the opportunity to learn every aspect.....I can't remember the last time that it was about the money or the power, but I do remember the individuals that I have assisted over the years to reach their dream of home ownership. One case that always comes to mind was that of a single African American mother who lived with her mother and had paid the mortgage on the home for several years. Her Mom died suddenly without leaving a will....she had several siblings who 'graciously' offered to sell her the house. She didn't earn very much, had little savings, and credit that was a little shaky....but I knew that she would always make that payment if given the chance. I called in all of my markers with underwriting as well as the private mortgage insurance company and got her loan approved. I then helped her to arrange an estate hearing and went to court with her to plead her case as well as verify that she had loan approval...the judge awarded her enough money from the established value of the home to make her downpayment and pay her closing costs. As I walked out of the courtroom and passed her chair...she looked at me...eyes filled with tears and silently said 'thank you'. ..I cried all the way back to my office. For many years , she periodically visited me to share her latest accomplishments and the blessings in her life.....that makes it worth it! Then there is the volunteer work for 'habitat for humanity'. And my work with young, unmarried, pregnant women to mentor them as they complete their education, obtaining marketable skills, and gaining the resources to escape becoming a system statistic. For these women, our support efforts and having someone to believe in them until they can believe in themselves is the catalyst for taking that first step....that makes it worth it. And then there are those women who have been so cruely abused without alternative solutions for food and shelter for themselves and their children that when you look into their eyes, they are dull...almost opaque...they've lost themselves to their abusers. Each time I look into those dull lifeless eyes it still tugs at my heart. Our professional women's group locates funding for tuition, living expenses, and day care. We also play a major role in group discussions to restore or create a vision that there is not oly a chance, but a choice of a better life....thus restoring a every person's right to personal dignity....that is taken for granted by most....that's worth it. So the most inherent value in being a woman of strength is seeing the victories....however small...that one person has the ability to make a difference...that's worth it!  | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 4/25/2007 11:16:01 PM | Vinny yeah gosh deer hunting what was she thinking..shouldn't she be washing dishes, wearing pretty dresses, cooking you dinner? I see in no way how a woman going deer hunting would be a bad thing?
Strong woman I guess by the posting there are alot of different definitions..I would rather be myself and let that define me | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 5/2/2007 4:07:21 PM | | I have mised feelings when I hear the phrase "a strong woman". Personally, I wouldn't get involved with a weak woman. They're way too much trouble. No matter how much time and effort you invest into the relationship, it is never enough. They need constant re-assuring, are suspicious of anything you do, and are just way too much maintainence. That being said, there are also a lot of insecure women out there who masquerade as strong women. They are very defensive and think they have to constantly prove to the world how "strong" they are. My opinion is that if you are genuinely a strong person, you don't need to prove it to anyone. | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 5/2/2007 4:31:31 PM | Well... a strong woman will keep the fort down while you are away. A strong woman believes in herself and knows that even if you aren't the proverbial "one", she doesn't necessarily NEED you. She will find a way to deal with whatever life offers at her (or throws in her direction). She will be there and support you in your times of need. She understands that she is not the center of the earth and that it does not revolve around her. She doesn't fall to pieces over the small stuff. If there is something to be said, she will find a way to say it. If you up and suddenly blurt out "I'm leaving, it's over". She does not fall to pieces and hug your ankles and scream NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
hmm.. and maybe she can carry her own purse, I guess. But then again, when I look at my own response, maybe I am thinking of an independant woman. Perhaps you can't have one without the other? | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 5/2/2007 4:35:49 PM | a strong women to me means,i women who can,get up in the morning and get three kids fed and clothed and off to school,a women who can stand for her rights as a women,a lover,a wife,a freind..a women who understands what uncontional love really meanings,and does not abuse it,r others..a women who secretly takes whats coming to her on the chin,and faces up to all that has to be said and done...and lets no one..r one thing to put her down..i hope this answers ur question some what. | |
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 5/2/2007 5:13:05 PM |
a strong woman or man lives life on life's terms and doesn't need anyone to validate them as a woman or man. strength comes from within. its the way we live and handle our lives, dealing with the adversity with dignity. being true to yourself.
ty loco... for saying so much better what I was wanting to say. I was reading the guys responses and couldn't help but notice that they pretty much all had two definitions. One for a strong woman... another for a 'true' strong woman. I thought that was kinda funny.
I am a strong woman. I've never felt "trapped", never felt I "couldn't" do something, have dealt with diversity in my life and am a better person for it, have 'stepped up to the plate' when needed and not expected thanks in return, have responded in emergency situations with leadership and clarity of mind that surprised even myself afterwards, have never been afraid to speak my mind, have an opinion, or stand up for what I believe in and have listened while others voiced their opinions and beliefs.
I'm not sure how I'll get along with this southern mentality that women are meant to shut up and put up, but if I can't find someone who appreciates me for who I am, I guess I'll just stay single... how's that for strong??
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| what does the term a strong woman mean to you?
Posted: 5/2/2007 8:07:10 PM | A strong woman is one whom I seek, she will be "Me" when I'm not there. She'll tell me when I'm being a moron and tell me to knock it off LOL. She'll basically be the check and balance to our relationship, I will make the decisions but never without consulting her and getting feedback on it.
Kevin | |
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