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| Helpful Hints and tips
Posted: 5/4/2005 5:21:54 PM | Jack! I think I've finally done it! The interests took awhile but at least you can read it now  . Have a look and tell me what you think! ta, Alex  | |
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| Thank you Jack For My Reviews!!!
Posted: 5/5/2005 3:02:05 AM | Hey Jack and Everybody Else Reading this Thread.
Now that I Have Gone Thru and Fixed and Fixed and Fixed My Profile
Now I am Curious as to Why Women Across PlentyofFish is not Responding to My Profile.
It is what all women would die for in there Quest for Looking For Mr.Right
You think Maybe it is Because they are Reading all My Posts????
I seriously don't know what gives,either we got a lot of ignorant women out there or maybe they are just waiting for us men to write them. | |
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| Thank you Jack For My Reviews!!!
Posted: 5/5/2005 5:28:04 AM | "maybe they are just waiting for us men to write them."
Yep, that is EXACTLY it. You really thought women were going to e-mail you? Really? Seriously, most will only write in response to an e-mail, rarely will they initiate.
YOu got your profile to where you like it, so the next item to look at is how does your initial letter to women look like? Oh wait, I take it you don't send an initial letter and instead opt to wait for people to come to you. Bad move dude. Be proactive, put together a kickbutt e-mail and send it off. Lemme see what you would normally send. Send it to my e-mail, I'll check it out.
jm | |
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| Seline, LadyKiss, Wheatking and Ickybob, the reviews are in!!
Posted: 5/5/2005 6:03:03 AM | I really gotta catch up. Had a lot going on in the last couple of days folks, sorry for the delay. So here goes....
More Multiple reviews. Stand in awe at my brilliance, shun your eyes from my bright light of truth if you dare. I calls 'em as I sees 'em!
This goes out to Selina, Ickybob, Ladykiss & 'da Wheatking.
Headlines:
Selina:
"Looking for new and different". Yeah? Who isn't. You need more originality. Try again.
Ickybob:
WTF is with the SN dude? ha ha. But anyway, your headline, "Here's looking at you kid"? Eh, its out there ok, and fans of the older movies might peek in. But thats still kinda long shot. Care to dare to be more original?
Ladykiss:
"Still believe in the possible".
Thats nice and all, but not exactly eye catching stuff. Try again.
All of ya's, use some creativity. Humor. Originality. Headlines are used to catch peoples attention.
Wheat King:
"Back in the high life",
uummmm, yeah ok, not sure how this was meant to come across. How or why are you back in the highlife. Where ya been before now? lol.
Good try, try again. Remember, originality. You wanna catch someones eye!
Pictures:
Selina
Yours is a big I dunno, ghostly. The lighting and such makes it look more like a dream vision or something than a picture. And the expression on your face, from what I can tell, is not happy but maybe reflectant. Get another picture that shows off your smile and in good lighting.
Ickybob,
Your pictures are actually pretty good. One shows you laid back and chilling, one shows silliness and one of you in a uniform (in your younger day???). I am gonna say keep them all, leave as is! 
Ladykiss,
You got a smile in there somewhere? How 'bout a nice pic of it?
Wheatking
You have some good pictures there. I would suggest to shy away from so many pictures of you in a group, although I get why you put 'em up. You convey you play well with others! ha ha.
Keep your primary pic, the second one (magician?) and maybe the last one (humor!).
"Dating Interests"
Selina:
Congrats you hit the trifecta of boring, broad and general interests. Change them and do so quickly. If I may suggest, read the thread I think page 11. You will see this huge list of hints and tips I put out for everyone to read. I strongly suggest you go by that!
Ickybob,
You actually have a few unique interests listed, like woodworking, models and collecting (although you didn't specify what exactly). As I just recommended to Selina, go to the post I sent to the thread on tips and hints. I think it may help you a little here. You just need a few tweaks in this section.
Ladykiss, see Selina's review
Wheatking
you too. Although you have a couple of original things, like kite surfing & good wine.
"About me"
Selina:
Focus more on yourself, tell more of yourself and what you are like. Less on who you seek.
Ickybob:
Your section is actually fairly good. Maybe expand a little more on you and your attitudes and such.
Ladykiss:
Your section needs a little more about you. What are you like, and your attitudes and opinions on this or that. Maybe even expand a little on one of your interests.
Wheatking:
Oh please oh please lost the "nice guy" bit. A definite bad way to go. I get the sentiment you were trying for, but nnooo. lol
Last two sentences of your first paragraph, lose it. Too negative. Don't tell people what you think you are not, but rather focus on what you are.
You are "...in shape and go to the gym regularly." Thats it, keep it simple. No need to say "I am no Brad Pitt".  pthpthpthpthpth
Second paragraph you seem to want to get into what you do not want as far as in a woman. Stay away from those type negatives. Remain focused on the positives instead.
"First Date"
Selina:
A good way to go, "dinner and drinks" and ya even listed what kind of dinner (Greek and Italian). Thats a definite gold star for you!!!!!!
Lose this "....at the end of the night hopefully we woul;d have had such a great time that we kissed goodnight and ..a second date folllows ..who knows ....."
Ickybob:
well sir, not very original or unique. What would you really like to do? Something YOU would wanna do. (not sex related, ya horn dog! ha ha).
Seriously. there has got to be something a little more original. But if not, thats ok. You worded it well all the same.
LadyKiss:
You sure you didn't copy from Ickybob? Cause dayum! Pretty darn close to the exact same thing!
Wheatking:
Looks alright. You put some effort into it, so I gotta give ya marks there!
Ok ya'll, the doc has spoken. Get outta here and take my prescribed actions, or I am gonna stick you with a really long needle in a really sensitive place! ha ha ha ha
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Dulcet
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Joined: 4/25/2005
Msg: 306 | |
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| Keeley, you minx you
Posted: 5/5/2005 8:06:23 AM | Keeley
ok ok ok, GREAT pictures!!!!!!!!
Good job!
Do ya really want the one with you and the pooch though? | |
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| Thank you Jack For My Reviews!!!
Posted: 5/5/2005 4:38:16 PM | Ok Jack in some ways us some us men would think being at other non-free dating sites like american singles,they dont have a forum,if they do it must be in a secret place
Dulcet responded from the forum
saying this to me
and I responded back
with honest to goodness writing
though i did start a thread over at Realtionships"Sometimes women out there can be ignorant.just because one is bald shouldn't make them not wanna write back to you.
I did appologize for my wording of ignorant replaced it with shy.
Personally bald men dont bother me. I love the look. I think that we women can be morons. We say that we want the nice, sensitive, caring, loving man. But when he is right there in front of us, we bolt for the nearest guy in black leather. (sigh) If I could understand that myself then I might be able to explain it to others and help.
If you are ever down San Antonio way, lemme know and I'll buy you a cup of coffee, and rub your head.
Original Message YOU sent on 5/5/2005 2:52:24 AM
Yes,Sometimes women out there can be ignorant.just because one is bald shouldn't make them not wanna write back to you.
Regardless of what nationality,age,location it shouldn't matter about getting to know each other
why aren't they knocking my door down in sunny ca?
because some women out there are not even who they present themselves to be
that is difficult to say because we got those who believe in finding there Destiny like in the movie "Sleepless in Seattle"/"You Got Mail"
then we got those who happen to ruin it for men by being a scam artist,Or Female Spambot pretending they are a female and sharing fake photos
then saying "I love You" in less than a week
Marriage Fraud is Out there,Any Guy Can Make a Fake Icq Number,Profile and Say to the Man "I just Bought a Visa" it will cost you such and such dollars,and can wire it thru western union and pick it up.
Maybe it is because I am not in the Top 500 in the PoF Ratings of Photos
or Somebody at POF isnt showing My Profile to All Lady Members
Im Open to Every Single Woman out there that speaks English even
if she already has children,we all make mistakes.and is time to move on.
as for my profile,What i have said is all true
have before and after photos
what more can a woman ask for on a profile like mine is beyond me
as you notice on it,I never mentioned "Sex"
Thank You For Writing to Me and Wishing Me Luck on Finding Truelove,maybe some Real woman will reply back Like You.
_______________________________________________________________
Dulcet
I was crusing along in the forums, and came across your post about having your profile analyzed, and decided to check it out.All I can say is that if I lived in CA, I'd like to get to know you better.Your profile says everything that most women claim they want in a man.So why are they not knocking down your door over there in sunny CA? As a woman, I sometimes do NOT get women,so I can't be much help. I will however send you my warmest wishes that you find your true love.
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rdy4it
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Joined: 4/26/2005
Msg: 310 | |
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| DJLover01, Valentinoagain, Itsgary, skip1701, JSmooth, gentlespirit, Ladydi & SarGasm
Posted: 5/6/2005 6:48:35 AM | To DJLover01, Valentinoagain, Itsgary, skip1701, JSmooth, gentlespirit, Ladydi & SarGasm......
To those who missed my earlier post, I suggested that first you should read the previous reviews. This will give you an excellent sense of direction in which way to go. I have seen all of your profiles in the last day or so (I am lagging behind a bit lately) and found a lot of commonalities to them all. Its as if you all either read from the same manual, "How to create a generally broad and unexciting profile", or just decided to be uninspired and put whatever the heck you came up with in a second or two of thought.
But thats ok, thats why you are now asking for help. A few suggestions from moi. So boys and girls, gather around and prepare to read my thoughts and decide whether or not to take my suggestions to heart. All I can do is offer 'em!
First, it would really help you (and me) out tremendously if you looked at previous posts as you may very well pick up lots of helpful hints and suggestions.
Second, as you will see in many many many of my posts, the same themes remain true. Kind of weird if you ask me, but hey, thats the way it tis.
Here goes.....
1) Your headline:
Please consider this: Your headline is designed to catch peoples attention.
None of this "Nice guy/gal seeks..." stuff. Boring!! Get creative, get crazy! Have fun with it. Try to think of what would catch YOUR eye, to hold your attention enough for you to go reading further of someones profile.
2) Pictures: A definite must have. I hate it, I really really do, but it is a must. Most (a generalization) people will not even bother with reading a profile unless there is a pic. Rude and Crude, I know. But it is as it is.
So getcha a picture or two and put it up in your profile. Be sure:
a) it is nothing with bad lighting,
b) NOT a group picture or it is not a picture with more than one (YOU) in it,
c) Dont feature your kid, cars or pets.
d) Wouldn't kill ya to smile!
3) "Do you do Drugs?", this is a question asked in the profile. If you answer anything other than "Yes" or "No", people will automatically assume "Yes" and more than likely turn away and go to the next profile. It may not be so much you do drugs (which I suspect mostly would be pot... but thats my own suspicions) but its that you were holding back and or some may even equate it to lying. Not a good first impression to put forth.
Another question: "Marital Status", be truthful. What is the deal currently as you fill out your profile. If you are dating somebody, well? If you have been divorced for years and years... well?
4) "Dating Interests"
This, I think, is the one biggest boo boo most people make. This is where you really show your stuff! What are you interested in? Its that simple really.
Perhaps you like reading. DONT PUT READING! Be more specific as "reading" is too friggin general. Anything general is open to interpretation and more than likely backfires on ya.
For example, let's say you actually put in there, "Movies".
Another general and very broad interest.
Think a moment, will ya? How many movies do you suppose has been made since turn of the century? Now of all those movies, how many different variations and genre do you think there are?
If you think about it, the different varieties are staggeringly high. Do you really like all of those differences and varieties? I am gonna bet "no". So be specific. You like horror over comedy? Maybe chick flicks versus guy movies of shoot-em-up bang bang movies. Whatever the case, be specific. This is a very important key that may unlock your future happiness should you meet someone!
"Dinner". Yeah, there is a real specific interest too. Wanna even start to imagine how many different types of dinners and foods and scenarios there are? One would geta headache just trying. Again, specifics!!!
Generally, there are a few "industry standards" to avoid. Well, maybe not avoid, just be more specific.
TV/Movies
Dinner/cooking
Camping
Music
Reading/books
Computers
Always ask yourself, "what about 'em". Then fill it in some as to what you like about them, or what variety or what have you.
And my other tip is, be sure to have lots of things listed. 8 or 10 is what I would go with.
Why?
Its the shotgun theory, for those who hunt. You see, a shotgun shell has many tiny little pellets generally called "buckshot". When the gun is fired, these buckshot spread out as they fly through the air towards the target, ensuring larger coverage and thus, better chance at hitting something.
You are the gun. Your interests are the buckshot. And the more you list (and specify) of interests, the better chance you have of having something in common with someone else that will, thusly, create a hit! Then an e-mail is sent and before long, you are at the beginning of a nice relationship.
"About me"
This section is where you can tie in all in. This is THE place you want to express yourself as to who you are. What your attitude on life is like. Maybe expand some more on your interests too.
Tell about yourself, stay positive. Don't go referring to the ex or please do not go on and on about what you do not want from a person or what you do not like. This is a bigas* turnoff and it can be best left for later, after the first contact e-mail.
Remain focused on yourself and what you want. End this section with who you seek. What kind of person. Again, stay away from the negatives of who you do NOT want and so forth. Stay positive!
And finally, the :First Date"
Ladies, turn away for a second, I gotta talk to 'da guys.
Dudes, guys and gents. Here's the deal. Wether we like it or hate it, this is where we can either seal the deal or seal our fate.
We HAVE to take charge here, and indicate what we would like to do on the first date. We have to take control, it is expected. None of this "maybe", or "might" stuff, no no. Don't be tentative. And don't write "whatever the lady would like". No no. Oh sure, sweet thought and nice gesture sure. But guys, let's have a contingency plan at the vert least. Because odds are she will be expecting you to take control and will invariably say "I don't know, what would you like to do?"
Save time and save face here brothers! Take control, make the call!
Just don't go writing "sex" or some BS like that. First date dudes! Let's keep it gentlemanly, ya know?
Ok ladies, you can read from here on.
Ladies, if i may take a second here. Ladies, We appreciate you writing in the "first date" section how you'd leave it up to us guys or maybe even ut "whatever" in this section but you know, it really helps us out a lot if you give us a clue what you might consider. You see, it would be dreadful for all involved if you were the type who expected a nice dinner and maybe some dancing, but we took you skydiving instead because all you said was "whatever he wants".
That may make for a bad first date especially for someone who is terrified of heights. ha ha.
So all I am saying here is help us out just a bit. Give us a direction in which to go. Clue us in on what you would really like to do on the first date. We'll take it from there, I think we'll be able to handle things from that point!
Ok, so there ya have it. My points and helpful hints. From this point on, for those who want reviews, ya better have read this post first. And then in an e-mail to me or post on the thread you've read this and made the changes accordingly before I even start your review. Otherwise, well, it may be a loonnnggg wait in the doctors' waiting room! lol | |
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| Thank you Jack For My Reviews!!!
Posted: 5/6/2005 7:39:06 AM | @ the bald one: Hey you can have the best profile out there, be the nicest guy in the world, and they don't beat a path to your door. Best, nicest,etc is all in the eye of the beholder, the best we can hope to do here is have a profile that accurately tells who we are, or maybe not, maybe I should say puts a positive spin on who we are. At least a profile that doesn't turn then away, LOL. After that it helps to go out and look for the women, send the ones that you think should look at you a short note, and hopefully they will take notice.
Just because you have a good profile, doesn't mean they are going to come to you, beleive me I know that more than anybody. You've got to sell yourself. Little things you can't do anything about affect how well your chances are, for me living in Kansas, my age, and wanting children are a killer, but that's me, I could change it, I could move, but don't want to. I guess they aren't little things, but they sure affect my chances.
Do you want to lie about them or neglect them in your profile, I don't think so, because we are not trying to trap somebody, we are trying to find a match. No matter how hard we try a left hand glove isn't going to fit a right hand. Well I guess we could turn it inside out, but then it just wouldn't look right now would it, but it would keep us warm. That's some people approach on here but they aren't looking for a match, they just want to find something warm. | |
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| Thank you Jack For My Reviews!!!
Posted: 5/6/2005 7:43:00 AM | jheldatksuedu,
Bravo BRAVO!!!!! Well stated my friend.
You are correct, the profile is not the make all, break all thing. It is a tool, one of many. It is the first of many that will need to be employed.
A good profile is fine, but then you have the e-mail, the "first contact" e-mail in which will further convey things about the writer as well as why they decided to drop an e-mail to the person they chose.
Then there is the reply and so forth and so on. | |
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| Thank you Jack For My Reviews!!!
Posted: 5/6/2005 8:01:39 AM | @bald one: a couple other things
dont let it be with you,you would be missing out!!!!
not really what you wanted to say "without you" maybe ???
and spelling on the word don’t
Also 2nd part "wiether” not spelled correct, think you want whether
Spelling should not be a big thing in my book but everything that’s wrong adds up and gives just one more reason to pass you over and go to the next one. It’s a tough sell in the real world.
I would also loose the part about the 3 co-workers at the table, that sounds needy and desperate
My main thoughts on you, get out and join some groups, learn to dance get some confidence in walking up to girl and talking to them, it’s tough but it’s better than sitting on the sideline waiting for them to come to you, You’ll get old and gray waiting for that, I guess you found a way to get rid of the gray though.
Just my thoughts. Good luck | |
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| Thank you Jack For My Reviews!!!
Posted: 5/6/2005 8:04:24 AM | I would really love a review. I know you said you are catching up. I just wanted to bring my name back up.
~Kyrie~ | |
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| Thank you Jack For My Reviews!!!
Posted: 5/6/2005 9:23:11 AM | @ last chance: got a question for you but I can't talk to you because I'm not female....
I hate it when people limit who they let email them, there's more to live then just finding that special someone.
So think about that people. Are you not looking for friends too?
We can all use friends, maybe a friend, one you haven't met yet of the same sex has somebody you really need to meet. Not so in this case, but you never know, keep your options open. Maybe that special someone is one year out of your specified age range and they just can't contact you so they give up. Don't shoot yourself in the foot. | |
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| I'll review your profile and give ya some dating advice
Posted: 5/6/2005 9:28:19 AM | | I am a woman and I wanted to tell you, you have one of the best, real profiles I have ever read. You sound like a genuine and awesome cool guy. Too bad I live across the country :) I wouldn't change a thing. | |
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| I'll review your profile and give ya some dating advice
Posted: 5/6/2005 9:46:53 AM | | @msreddress: You need to tell whom your talking about here, I assume it's last chance, I agree it's a pretty good one already, I couldn't come up with much to say about it, but Jack will have some stuff to say, he always does. | |
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| DJ Lover review
Posted: 5/6/2005 11:56:46 AM | Sweetgal,
Ok, so I checked out your profile and wanted to add to my previous posts these more specific thoughts and suggestions:
Your headline, "Sweet Gal".
Sorry, not gonna work. Why? Too bland. Too widely used in POF, ya blend in. Remember, your headline needs to be eye catching. What would catch your eye? Something funny perhaps? A quote from your fave poem? Maybe the title of a song, or a book.
Or some saying you've heard. Just something original and unique. Try it out, and have fun with it.
Your pics:
Personally, I think you are quite attractive and have a killer smile.
Of all of your pics, use only the first, second, thirs and sixth, using the sixth as your primary pic.
Lose the others, they only work against you.
Dating Interests, list more more MORE. The more you list, the odds are someone will find something they have in common with you, thusly will e-mail you if you do not e-mail them first. (Guys dig it when chicks e-mail them first by the way!)
"About me"
Stay away from negative points as to what you are NOT, focus more on what you are! What you are like, what your general attitude is like (glass half full or half empty?) and what you seek. Stay away from
Watch your spelling too.
"Sum" should be "some".
"muh", supposed to be "my", 'least I believe thats whatcha meant.
"loveble", "lovable"
"u" should be "you".
Misspellings equal laziness. You dont want folks to think you're lazy, do you?
First date is good. A keeper! Good job. Lose the "catch a movie" part though. Doesn't really work in reality.
Ok, there ya go!
Jack | |
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