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| Me! Me! Me!!!
Posted: 4/29/2005 3:47:28 PM | | Go for it dude, would love to hear your opinion. Thanks. | |
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| Me! Me! Me!!!
Posted: 4/29/2005 5:08:31 PM | ok ok you WIN lol the two b/w pics are GONE.. POOFFFFFFFFFFFFFF ..... :) should I assume the changes to the rest of my profile were ok then Jack ??
Thanks for your opinions guys... :) keep up the good work !
P.S. Jheld... I have that I dont want more children because I 'CANT' have anymore hon... I have the playground just not the playpen | |
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| Me! Me! Me!!!
Posted: 4/29/2005 5:14:43 PM | Jack, I'll get you syndicated in 700 Papers across the country! | |
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Kikoro
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Joined: 4/15/2005
Msg: 154 | |
| Me! Me! Me!!!
Posted: 4/29/2005 6:18:08 PM | ok  I should know better, but so far I really like what you have to say :)
don't nag me about pictures of me smiling cuz I smile like someone who is about to loose her teeth if she does.
cogito ergo ask Kik. | |
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| Loup review
Posted: 4/29/2005 6:19:40 PM | Loupdubois,
Ok, about your heading, "Young, fit, smart and sensitive"
Are you seeking or is this a self proclamation? lol
Some on, you can get more original than this. You are trying to catch peoples eye, make the headline count and lure 'em in!
About your pics:
I sincerely hope you didn't pay money for two of the three. Lose the b&w's. They make you look either too serious, depressed or kinda creepy
You have one thats actually good (colored), looks sincere enough too.
Got any others along the line of this one? Maybe a little closer and showing your face better?
"Dating Interests"
Reading (Literature), cooking (gourmet or otherwise) and movies. All staples to every single profile it seems at POF.
I will give you credit however at your attempt to be more unique, adding a few additional words or descriptions.
Can you squeeze out just a few more interests that are uniquely you?
"About me":
Good start and the flow was well into you fell into the negative aspects one should always avoid.
When you started the "my worst is that I'm not terribly patient if I think someone's playing at
silly buggers (I've always wanted to use that expression, hooray!)."
Lose that part, save it for later.
Do not focus as much on things you are not or of those people or qualities you do not seek. Instead, focus on the positives, who you are and what you're like and those qualities you find attractive in others.
Lose the "turn offs". Its a waste of time and space. As if those who possess those qualities will really avoid your profile just 'cuz you said you didn't like 'em. Ever ask a dishonest person to be honest just for your sake? It never works.
Your last two lines in this section, revamp 'em. You are missing the conveyance of your point and it comes off bad. Re-write it. I expect a 500 word essay on my desk by lunchtime tomorr.... oh wait. Never mind.
Just lose the last few lines and try again.
"First Date"
You rambled. Ramble enough, you hit on to something good.
And so you did.
Lose everything except
"All night cafe or go for fresh bakery, and having long conversations that make you feel drunk even though you're not. I love forgetting what time it is, until suddenly it's dawn."
That is original and good!!
So there ya go, my thoughts. | |
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| ladygediva Review
Posted: 4/29/2005 6:33:12 PM | Ok, "lady gediva's" turn.
Headline: "sexy & sassy, lookin for cute and cuddly"
All I can ask is do you really think this is unique, original and would it really catch your eye if the foot was in the other shoe? Me bet not.
Come on Sexy and Sassy, put together a headline that'll not only catch an eye, it'll yank it nearly out of it's socket! You wanna attract attention, this is the first line of attack!
Ok, about your pic. Do I rrreeeaaallllyyy have to say anything about it? Or can you read my mind? Lets get real here, just for s ec. DAYUM! You need ta find a better pic and fast. In teh meantime, remove this picture you have displayed. It is best to send on your third e-mail to somebody.
You are just "out there" in a lot of different ways with that pic! ha ha, and some of it may garner some unintended attention. But I dont know, perhaps thats what you are fishing for.
"About me":
Drop the entire first few sentences of this section, or at the very least move it to the end.
"hmmm what to say..well im happily divorced, lookin to move on with my life.. im not lookin for someone in particular..im easy goin, a great buddy to have,(im actually tired of goin out with someone and ending up like there older sister type of a relationship).."
I would really like to see your profile to start with the next line, "im cute,funny,sassy,wild in the rite settings,im spontaneous,and im honest."
THAT would be a great follow-up to your creative and attracting headline you will put up.
LOSE LOSE LOSE those things you don't want or not looking for or of those qualities in others you do not like. Stay away from the negatives, focus on the positives. Keep on track about you, what is your general attitude and such. Do you have a sense of humor? Most people do. So use it. Be unique, have fun and stay positive.
You are a "bomb cook"? Theres an explosive admission. (bbboooo bad pun for me!)
Get rid of that, switch it with something like, "When I cook, it's 'da bomb!!" or something along those lines.
Very good to brag a little about some things you do and proud of or do well.
Watch your spelling too. We all have that problem, really we do.
"i" should be "I", "r" should be "are" unless you are twelve years old. And I am sorry, your photo does not in any way suggest this!
I like your "3-p's" you list, and am now reconsidering that perhaps you should start your whole profile with that! Good stuff and uniquely Y-O-U!! Great job on that! Yeppers, put it at the beginning of this section.
Lose the bit about kissing at the end. Too much too soon and to be honest, too much pressure. One would get an idea from you that should your toes not curl, they are screwed.... and not in the good way!
"First Date"
I have said it many times before on many other posts. KEEP IT SIMPLE.
"lunch date, or a meeting in the park..to see if we mesh"
Leave the rest for later, in another e-mail.
There ya go, I have spoken! lol | |
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| HeartsnFlowers review
Posted: 4/29/2005 6:44:52 PM | HeartsnFlowers....
Your headline, "Looking for a little humor"
Why not, if I may suggest, open with "looking for some laughs"
Its not too original, but it seems to flow better. It'll do until you think of something more eye catching.
Your picture, Nice picture! Great smile, looks friendly. I do not think I'd change much of anything with that pic. Maybe do something with the hands, but thats really minor! Nice pic!!
"Dating Interests"
You have won the trifecta in this evenings profile sweepstakes. ha ha, you have actually managed to list every single interests that most every other profile in POF has listed. These are what I refer to as "industry standards".
"Sports"? So very vague.
"Music"? So many different genres and varieties
"reading"? See the above
"Movies"? See the above
"Dining"? See the above.
Expand these things, make 'em your own. Be unique and creative. And use some humor, you like to laugh, so I have to presume you have a few laughs of your own.
"About me" section, well, it's kinda anorexic. Feed 'ol girl before she starves. You have two, count 'em two sentences meant to describe you, your attitude, things you like. Two sentences? You are sssoooo selling yourself short. Come on now, open up. Share! What are some of the things you like, you enjoy doing. Focus on the positive, forget about the things you do not want or the type of people you do not want responding. Thats just a waste of time and space.
More about you, less about anyone else. K?
"First date":
You would actually not mind, on a first date of meeting someone, go for a walk in a park?
Is that rreeeaaallllyyy what you'd wanna do? Come on, spill it. What would you like to do? Go out for coffee? How 'bout gourmet coffee? And maybe location. On top of the highest building in your city and drink it?
Hit a local comedy club perhaps. Or just meet at the bookstore over overpriced java and an underrated paperback. Just think on it some and then let loose. | |
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| Gingers review, Add some spice to your life!
Posted: 4/29/2005 6:59:57 PM | Time for some Ginger to spice up the evening!
Not a bad headline for ya too, by the way! ha ha
Ok Ginger, your headline, its below par. Get creative. Remember, you are trying to grab somebodys attention. You wanna grab it enough to where your headline will grab a guy by his asspiration, shaking a few times and entice him to read further.
Which leads me to the next part, your picture.
Nnnniiiiicccceeee, change nothing! Great smile, good pose. NICE. It is just a little dark, but I think with that bright smile you can get away with it. Got another picture with you smiling? Add it, you can't have too many! lol
"Dating Interests"
"All Summer Activities", sorry, need a little more clarity on that. Expand on this LOTS.
Its always good to have atleast 8 interests listed, and the more specific the better.
"Eats"? That another word for "Food"? ha ha, good try at being creative. But how about going into your kids of favorite foods you like. Or maybe the kind you like to cook.
Most of you rlist is vague, and basically the industry standard. Expand, be more creative and uniquely y-o-u.
"About me":
Stay away from the negatives of who you do not want, or what you do not want or what you are not like. Stay focus on the positives, what you do like, what you are like and who you seek.
Lose "Please no liars, cheaters, married men, one-nite stands, men under 35 or over 45"
AND lose "non-materialistic" (whenever it is listed, most guys believe the exact opposite)
And definitely lose the "PICTURES COMING SOON!!!"
I think you're covered!:o)
First Date, good , very very good!
So there ya are. That wasn't too painless now was it? It being your first time, I tried to be gentle
Oh and thank you for the kudos on my advisements. I appreciate all forms of gratifications... I mean for my work ;o) | |
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| BlondeBonoBabe
Posted: 4/29/2005 7:10:36 PM | To 'da BlondeBonoBabe
Headline: "Zero Tolerance"
Sorry babe, it is a zero to me.
Come on, imagination. Get creative. In your headline, you are trying to grab someones attention. To catch their eyes enough to read your profile.
"Zero Tolerance" just ain't gonna cut it.
Your picture, You have a pleasant enough smile, but whos' the kid? I always have a problem with pictures where a kid is featured. It just seems wrong to me. If you have a better picture, please seriously consider it.
"Dating Interests"
Ok, 5 of your interests are not the "norm" one would typically find on every other profile. Good job. Now expand on those. Travel? Where?
Politics? Participating yourself or debating?
Harleys, riding or watching or collecting?
Religion? Participating yourself or debating?
History? Participating yourself or debating?
Add a few more interests in there too,. More interests that are uniquely you.
"About me"
You may be a direct person, but you are unrealistic to expect to write "who does not tolerate players or people who have the 'Please Disease'."
Thats asking dishonest people to be honest just because you said so.
Lose it. Its a waste of time and space that can be better used to tell more about you!
Focus on you and what you are like, and focus less on negativity and of what you do not want or do not like. Stay positive.
Jeez, lose "No married, separated men/involved men or men with young children or live outside of the US. If you don't think we will 'click', don't waste our time." AND lose "no ex's or children. If you contact me, please have something to put on the table (and I'm not talking $$$)."
WTF??!!
Some on, get original. Losen up, your profile, to be bluntly honest, seems like you have something wedged up your aspirations. Loosen up and have fun with this. You are smiling in your picture, why? Use that to further write ABOUT YOU!!!!!!!!
"First Date", a sniff test? ha ha ha, ok, that was original and funny! I'd say change it, but it was just funny enough to keep. Maybe add one other thing to it, but that was pretty good.
You DO have a sense of humor. I suspected as much.
Show off more of it in your profile. PLEASE!!! It is quite attractive! | |
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| Kathylynn review
Posted: 4/29/2005 7:21:56 PM | Hi Kathylynn,
Your headline, not very original. Come on, get that gray matter 'aworkin!
Get creative and unique.
You are looking to grab someones attention. Do you really believe "Looking for a Friend (and maybe more?)" is going to get the job done, especially if there are probably three dozen headlines identical to yours out there?
Your Pictures, NICE. Change nothing.
Maybe add one more, outside of work and the car.
"Dating Interests"
You have listed three things that are industry standards.
"Camping, Walking & reading". Lose 'em all OR expand them. What do you like about camping? Where do you like to walk? What do you like to read?
List about 6 or 7 more interests. Be original and uniquely you. Go ahead, have fun with it. Don't be scared to dive right on in, the water is warm!!
"About me":
Very sparse. Need more, LOTS MORE. Tell about yourself, what your like, what kind of attitude you have. Maybe even take some time ot expand as to why you like to watch wrestling, or as we say here in the south, 'wrasslin!
Focus on you and the positives, stay away from the negatives and of those things you dont want, dont like or not looking for. Big 'ol waste of space and time that can be better used to talk about y-o-u!:o)
"First Date"
Dinner? Thats it? Is that what you reeaaalllyyy want to do on your first date? Can you think of something more original, maybe more fun and enjoyable?
So there ya go, my thoughts. Enjoy and let me know how it works out for ya. | |
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| You You You, and in color!!
Posted: 4/29/2005 7:24:17 PM | @ Countrylin69
Great job getting rid of the B&W's. Ssssoooooooo much better!
Now when ya gonna work on the rest of your profile? It looks the same as before. Did I fall asleep or otherwise miss something? Sometimes it happens. | |
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| You You You, and in color!!
Posted: 4/29/2005 8:35:51 PM | lmaoooooooo yes I revamped it ... I took out the 'NOTS'.. added more interests.. got rid of the extended version of my 'date'.. :(..... I added info about what a 'signwriter' is..... you sleepin or should I get you to write it for me lmao :) *winks
***tosses ice down yer shirt ! | |
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| I'll review your profile and give ya some dating advice
Posted: 4/29/2005 10:32:44 PM | Ok Jack I did fix mine...
I did what you told me to say told about why I am Bald and Fixed the Intro about Me,Which does have a good sense of humor I'd Say.~lol~
Ive also changed My nickname as well just to see what kind Feedback I Would Get ~LOL~
I've been bald for 6 months,some like it some dont.but I am not Plump as others would think.I am all muscle,I am not a pervert by far,I am one who is is not used to advertising myself
like most girls/spambots do on most instant messengers. I think most girls are waiting for men to talk to them here on the POF Messenger,as for having kids or not,that doesnt bother me,we all have made mistakes some part of our lives,now its time to move on,stop saying"Can we just be Friends" and become more than just an online friend/Friend off the net...
anyone else agree??? | |
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| Help!!!
Posted: 4/29/2005 10:57:04 PM | Ok so Jack i read your posts and i thought you were so right. I already have heaps of boys contacting me but i think it's just because they see another pretty face. I'd really like some one who might just be into me as a person.
Please help me!!! :P | |
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| Methos review, your turn
Posted: 4/30/2005 3:37:15 AM | Methos
That a kind of cigarette or one of the three musketeers? lol
What up dude.
About your headline, "Let's enjoy life together".
Headlines are meant to catch someones eye. To capture attention enough to prompt someone to stop and read.
Do you rrreeeaaallyyy believe thats gonna cut it? Seriously now, put the shoe on the other foot. Would it grab your attention?
No, the correct answer is no.
Come up with something more original. More creative, f-u-n amd YOU!
About your picture, its an ok (being honest here dude) pic as far as you can see your face, or half of it anyway. Can you possibly not smile any less?? Come on, you gotta have a pic with a smile or something where you are kidding around or something. USE IT, please.
To be honest, nothing against ya or anything, but truthfully your pic you chose to use makees you look like a Ross Geller wannabe. Bad move dude!
"Dating Interests"
LOSE "Movies", "Camping/hiking", "books/reading"
Why?
Look at about 12 other guy sprofile and you will see. These things are what I always refer to as "industry standards". EVERYONE and their mother uses these same tired old descriptions.
Get original. Get uniquely you.
List about a total of 8 or 10 interests, be a little more specific than "games" or "anything fun", Have fun with it too!
Like to hang glide? How about swimmin' with 'da sharks? Heck, maybe just contemplate navel lint. Whatever. Its original, it is uniquely you and odds are you wont find those in a majority of any other profile. That is your task here.
"About me"
Lose the "fresh out of school". Whatever you are trying to convey here isn't working. Keep the part of where you work though, good stuff!
You have a great sense of humor? PROVE IT.
Right there in the section called "about me". Let your inner comic out. Have fun with it! Loosen up more then run with it.
Tell more about yourself, your attitude and such. And of course stay away from negatives, which I think you did an excellent job on anyways. Perhaps you have a optimistic, positive attitude. A definite addition to put in your profile if thats the case!!
"First Date"
Its pretty good, but I believe you should take more control as to the whens and wheres for a first date. Though it's admirable you want to take her feelings and comfort into consideration, name something or a few things you'd consider doing on the first date. Will she need to expect a skydiving date? Or a night of playing video games? These things (if she were to presume) would not be interesting to most.
Just 'spressin my opinion here. Good luck and remember, use that humor of yours. Go ahead, try it out! | |
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| Country & Bald, re-review
Posted: 4/30/2005 3:49:50 AM | @ countrylyn,
again, great with the pics!!
I asked before if you really revamped your profile because I still saw only a few "dating Interests", none of which jumped out at me as original or uniquely y-o-u.
The first half of your profile, well, it is almost to the point of ROCKING! Good, very good.
But the second half, well he*l, you start going downhill fast with all these conditions of a guy "should" be, which is a quick turn of the words of "don't" and "not".
Lose this BS about "You should be goodlooking, 'pretty boys' dont do much for me"
Cut that out, and just go with, "Looking for RUGGED looking men, who always seem to make me say YOWZZZA"
You prefer taller guys? I have yet to meet a lady who doesn't. Perhaps this detail can be scrubbed entirely as it is an assumption easily lept to by us guys.
Your First date, its a keeper! Good job, tweak it some and you should be good to go!
@ The Bald One
lol, well now. Went and changed SN and everything eh? ha ha, and hey. Bonus, some chicks rrreeaaalllyyy dig a bald guy.
Excellent expansion of "Dating Interests", great job there!
Original opening funny in your "about me" section. I dunno though, might be a crap shoot. Perhaps leave it at the end instead of opening up with it. You should open with stuff about you. What makes ya tick, your attitude and some likes and such.
Then go with the Blad bet (who'd that go anyway?) and end it with a joke. A killer combo, I am telling ya!
"First date", jeez, you listed enough. Can't make up your mind? Thats what they may be inclined to think. Remember, we are expected to take control of the first date. Make the calls. I would suggest lose everythinge xcept the very last sentence. Just be silly, shoot some pool (lose the watching movies at home... on a first date it would be extremely rare for it to happen) and maybe a fun filled dinner at some happening place.
Ok ok, I added the last part.
Convey fun and humor. You got a good start, go on with it. Run with it. Run Forest, Run! Your profile is on the right track. | |
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| Peachy review, JM 2 'da 'resQ
Posted: 4/30/2005 4:02:03 AM | Thanks for the props Peachy.
I'll try to be gentle with your review.
"Just looking to hang out"? This is your headline to attract attention? Come on now, you are wwwaaayyyy more creative than this. Have fun with it. Use some of that humor I suspect you have. Go ahead, let loose.
About your pic, So which are you? That blonde chick looks familiar.
Anyway, try never to use pictures of you with more than one person, you, in it. Too distracting and a lot of times people wonder which you are.
Oh wait, you ARE The blonde chick. See? Gets confusing!!
Anyone tell you you look like that Brittney "mommy to be" Spears?
I digress. Ok, on with 'da review. How ya doing, fine so far? You are bursting into tears and running into the other room yet are ya? lol
Ok, "About me".
6 interests? Thats it? Thats all you live for? Oh wait, you are 18, I should not expect you would be of the mindset of adultdom and all that goes with it. You are young and have fun. Enjoying life to the fullest, I presume, or atleast try.
Well, with that in mind, cool. I would add more interests though. Try to add some things more uniquely you. Like to do those funky tricks on a skateboard? Do you compete?
Cartoons: What and why?
"Boys"? Really now. 18 and interested in boys? Well, thats a shocker (I am totally razzing you)
"About me"
Oh come now. You gotta have more to offer about yourself than two or three puny sentences. Expand as to what makes you y-o-u. Your attitudes, and all that jazz. What kind of friends you seek?
Stay away from being negative as to what you aren't looking for or what you do nto care for. Stay positive and focus on the task at hand. Your looking for new friends, what is it about you that will make someone interested in dropping you an e-mail and making friends with ya? Put your thoughts in response to that in the "about me" section.
Oh yeah, I wanted to also address your spelling. I realize you are young and probably talk the way you write. But stop it. It doesn't translate that well in a profile. No abbreviations that "r" or "u" or "unda".
Unless its a language thang from down "unda", in which case I'll just keep my trap shut. ha ha ha
Seriously, your typing of those things does not reflect kindly on your intelligence. If thats what you're shooting for, you did it. If not, change it and do so immediately.
"First date"
Eh, its alright. "Picnic under the stars" is original, do you often have picnics under the stars with your buddies? lol | |
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| Kik's turn for a review
Posted: 4/30/2005 4:11:52 AM | Kiki
I like that name better! ha ha.
Your headline, WTF is that? Latin?
More importantly, one has to ask themselves does it catch someones attention. Sure, I suppose a little.
You never explain in your profile whats it mean. Well??
About your pics,
Kid, babe, lady, l-o-s-e 'em! The lighting sucks. In 3 of 'em you look like you're in a red room with lots of heat (a place down under, way further down than Aussieland).
Your fourth pic is nice, as is the 7th and last. Keep those, dump the rest.
You have a good smile, got any other pictures that flaunt such a nice smile?? Use 'em if you do!
"Drugs? you prefer not to say?" I honestly dont know why people bother with this. It is a simple yes or no answer. Lack of answer makes most people jump to the conclusion (right or wrong is irrelavent in this point) that the answer is YES. Especially when you allude to it in your "about me" section. So the answer should indeed be "yes".
So answer it already. Yes or no. Be honest. What do you have to lose. If it's yes, I met a guy here yesterday I reviewed his profile, who lives in California that you may be interested in.
Your interests
Wow, excellent selections! Most original and uniquely you. Congrats, you passed the test!!!! Great job!
"About me"
Pretty good. Its honest and about you and sunnuvagun, you have a sense of humor!! Its original, quirky and most of all, its you as you see it. Not really much negativity in it, which is darn refreshing! And you focus on you!
Good work. | |
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Kikoro
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Joined: 4/15/2005
Msg: 169 | |
| Kik's turn for a review
Posted: 4/30/2005 5:56:52 AM | hmz, well I asked for it now didn't I
by the way, it's not cool to imply that I might like someone just because he 'probably does drugs' Color of the pic's is a filter, call it my artistical approach of who I am :p but it is a red room :p and the lighting does suck, hence.
you have a beard, hmm., I heard Santa needs friends too.
cogito ergo sum: I think thus I exist
cogito ergo 'whatever' : I think thus...,bla. | |
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| Kik's turn for a review
Posted: 4/30/2005 6:27:30 AM | | i would appreciate it if you could check my profile for me.....thanks | |
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| Thanks, Jack!
Posted: 4/30/2005 7:20:17 AM | | Thanks for the review - it's always good to have someone else looking over your shoulder cuz it can be real intimidating putting yourself "out there" like this! I'll try to beef mine up with your suggestions - | |
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| b0unc3 Review
Posted: 4/30/2005 8:34:30 AM | I'll give it a go.
Critique me Jack! | |
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