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| Onlyoneman review
Posted: 4/30/2005 2:03:18 PM | what a guy you are. seldom can anyone give criticism and it be constructive. maybe I should ask your opinion about my choice in men..cause up until now..they have all had a big L on the forehead!!
i changed my profile. take a look if you can...you know its hard not to have any sexual overtones and at the same time relay the message that you are serious about a relationship. I enjoy sex probably more than other women my age, but not to the point where i am willing to aimlessly sleep around...yet as soon as sex is mentioned...WHAM...lets go and see ya later.
thanks ...you are neat. | |
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Swexxi
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Joined: 8/18/2004
Msg: 179 | |
| Swexxi review
Posted: 4/30/2005 2:09:12 PM | Ok "Jack Mack".. Yes I'm mean, did you have to tell the whole world?? hahaha
 =
OK I changed and re vamped. Just letting you know I did. I guess this is why you are not on Chat anymore? LOL
Miss ya! Swex  | |
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| Steps up to the plate
Posted: 4/30/2005 2:23:02 PM | Okay, the toonsmith is in the house. I'm up for a review. I've had the best theatre critics tear me apart so I'm thick skinned.
Toonsmith | |
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| jheldatksuedu review
Posted: 4/30/2005 4:27:26 PM | @Jack You got your work cut out for you, this is really taking off big time.
No need to look again, Just wanted to say thanks, I made some of the changes.
Concerning pictures in general, I think one smiling head shot, one full body shot is all that's needed, then fill the rest of the photo slots out with action of you doing things or stuff your interested in. The photo is worth a 1000 words idea. 6 action photos say a lot much faster than reading 6000 words. I see no need for 8 smiling face shots, no matter how big the smile or beautiful the face is. Then after they look at my photos they can read the 6000 words  Have a great day. | |
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| Double Cabin's turn!
Posted: 4/30/2005 5:37:31 PM | DC,
ok, on to your profile. This is gonna be a bit of a toughie and I reserve the right to revisit this again for additional comments at a later time!
Your headline, "Wanting to come in from the cold",
this you think will capture some ladies attention? Would it of you if the shoes were reversed? I suspect not. Come on, get creative. Get out there, beyond the limits of your comfort zone. Get crazy, get imaginative. You rheadline is intended to grab someone by the eyeballs and entice them to read more.
"Dating interests", uniquely you! (well, except the "music", and "sports". Maybe expand these two? Be more specific).
Wouldn't hurt to add a couple more things too would it? Go ahead, give it a go.
"About me",
eh, its gonna be a toughie considering you will be limited in your online time for the next five months or so.
Tough sell!!!!
I did like what you wrote and your honesty! So major kudos on that!
I would lose the "relocation a real possibility" however. Save it for your first contact e-mail or perhaps second e-mail.
"First Date",
Keep it simple.
Leave it as "I like to walk, whether in the urban core or out past where the gravel gives way to clay, sandstone, granite, or whatever. Perhaps we could walk after a nice restaurant introduction, meal, drink, etc." | |
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| BlondeBonoBabe
Posted: 4/30/2005 5:58:07 PM | Hey Jack Mack, thanks for the profile makeover advice! As I took it to heart, I have revised my pics and profile. Honestly, am I more appealing to man of your intellect and humor?
Your fan.....BlondeBonoBabe | |
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| First ever MULTIPLE reviews!
Posted: 4/30/2005 6:10:35 PM | And now ladies and gents, for the forst time ever, I shall perform a multi-profile review at the same time..... while barefooted, typing and drinking from a glass at the same time. You wont find that kind of talent anywhere else!
Why?
As I have said before, 'Cuz I am just that darn good! lol
The unwitting victi... er um I mean volunteers are
Vixen1405, Teacher4u & Amphitrite!!
VIXEN,
Your headline, "They say fortune favor the brave", are you the fortune and the guy who replies is the brave? Or vice versa?
Lose it, too much too soon. Get creative, really grab someones attention. For guys, its best to put something in the headline that will, metaphorically, grab 'em by the balls to get him to read more about you!
TEACH, yours "teacher4u" well, not your finest work. I give ya a "D". Try again. See my above comments about headlines. Gotta catch their attention! Kinda like how you do with the kids in yoru class. YOu do have to get their attention, right?!
AMP:
"All By Myself". With those three words, you may be staying that way for awhile. Come on lady, loosen up. Read my previous comments. A headline is there to snare ones attention. To get 'em to read your profile. Use your creativity, your imagination. What kind of headlines catch your attention? That should be a good start as a guide for you!
"Pictures"
VIXEN:
Your pics, lose the very first one. Too dark. Lose the last one too, with you sitting with someone. Never have a picture with more than one person in it. YOU!
TEACH: Lose the side angle shot and the one of you with somebody in the snow. The other two are your best!Nice smile, do you have any pics where you are laughing? Maybe slip one of them bad boys in!
AMP,
The only one I would suggest you use is the second one. YOu have this look about you, dayum nice!! Lose the other 2 pics. One is obviously outdated, the other, an awkward pose.
VIXEN, almost forgot...
You are looking for "other relationship"? And what "other" might that be?
You are not looking to date? For a friend" Ah, then by process of elimination (in the guys mind anyway) you are looking for a boink buddy, right? Cause "other relationship" means nothing else but that in us guys mind. Important thing to remember!
"Dating Interests"
VIXEN,
A most excellent variety of interests. Great job!
TEACH, Lose "reading" or expand. What do you like to read most?
Otherwise, you have a good selection and wide variety of thangs. Good job, I give ya a "B"
AMP:
You listed 6 things that interests you, however of those six, three are general and vague. Try to expand these to be more specific. And maybe add about 3 or 4 more interests that are original and uniquely you!
"About me"
VIXEN:
I am sorry to break it to you, but this sucks and sucks again.
I have no friggin idea about the very first sentence you attempted to convey in your profile. Lose it and do so now. The next sentence, where you write that you have a wicked sense of humor, start this section with that, definitely! The next sentences and paragraph you did so well! But then, you fell into that familiar territory most everyone else does by sputing off about the things you don't want or the men you have no need for.
Do you really honestly expect a dishonest person or maybe a game player to avoid your profile simply because you said so? Wish I could mail you a quarter for 'da clue of 'da day. Some on, you strike me as wwwaaayyy smarter than that. Just leave that part off, thats all I suggest.
Your thoughts on the intimate encounter, see the beginning of this e-mail again. Do not put "other relationship" if you are not looking for a one night stand or a boink buddy.
I would definitely suggest you revamp the second half of your profile, and use that crazy humor you claim to have. Personally, I'd love to read more of that woven within your profile. I bet you are a real hoot.
TEACH: You are ohsoclose in having an actually good "about me" section. I'll grade you on a curve.
The "financially secure" part leaves a bitter taste in my mouth and may have intended consequences, or rather allusions about yourself you may not realize. Lose that little part.
AMP:
The quote is nice, but I'd save that for the end of the profile. Would carry more weight I believe.
Nice opening after that. Lose the "... I feel disappointed and throw ...". Stay away from negativity. Doesn't suit you. And just a big ol waste of time and typing. Stay positive!
You went on a few sentences about how you are in Scotland but moving soon back to the cold confines of Norway.So if a Scot were to respond to you, his time with you would be limited? And a Norweigian were to respond, he'd have to wait for your return? Too complicated, leave one or the other out.
Your profile really took off after that until you hit the wall in the last paragraph going on about what you dislike. Lose it, forget about putting it in here. It never works.
"First date",
VIXEN:
I gotta say, a bit scary. A walk along cliffs? lol, that IS original I'll give ya that! Keep it if you must.
TEACH: I liked it. Keep it, change nothing! Good job!
AMP:
You have nothing listed, why??
Thank you ladies, it was a priviledge. Just 'spressing my opinions, take from them as you may | |
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| Native Irish Gal Review
Posted: 4/30/2005 6:26:03 PM | Native Irish Gal,
"A great catch" reads your headline.
Really now? Think highly of yourself do ya? lol, I kid I kid.
Ok, headlines: they are a form of expression to snag ones attention enough to read more about you.
Do you honestly believe "A great Catch" will do that job? Would it honestly catch your attention if you saw that on a guys profile? Betcha not. You'll keep searching as it may blend into the other guys who has near identical headlines. Use your creative muscles. Have fun with it. Loosen up and run with it already!
Your picture, it is fair I have to tell ya. But it looks distorted. I'll have to give it like a 2 or something and that is purely 100% your smile! You have any other pics, with you smiling? A definite thing to use for sure!!!
"Dating Interests". You have three listed.
Horses BBQ and Gardening. Is it really wise to put Horses and BBQ next to each other? Conjures up some bad thoughts! ha ha ha.
Seriously, you need more interests. Aim for about 8 or ten. Make em yours, something you like to do and unique. Dont just put "reading and watching sports" and call it a day. Unacceptable. Expand on that!
"About me"
The first sentence is in error. Fix it please.
"I am described by my friends as...". Either you believe it or you don't. If you dont, lose it entirely. If you do, take a stand and proclaim it.
"I am "PFF: pretty, funny and friendly" lol
Why is everyone lately misspelling "HUMOR" as "Humour"? Is it something in the water. Can't say it's just from Canadians either. But I digress.
So watch the spelling, ok?
Your profile progresses nicely except, lose the "I am NOT looking for a father for them". Lose it quickly and without fanfare. Guys either never consider it or never believe it. If never brought up, it is not as widely believed anyway. But when mentioned, it is thought of despite being denied. Save the trouble, lose the sentence.
Lose the "I am financially independant;
Thats good, dont get me wrong. However, you followed this with another faux paus, "doesn't matter to me what a guy's income is"
A) Is always does to a guy. (big period)
B) Same goes for this subject as does the "not looking for a father for the kids". Save the trouble and just get rid of the sentences.
Keep the part about owning your own home and work full time though.
For one sentence, you were back on the right track, then again you veerted off the road and ended up in some cornfield in Iowa.
LOSE LOSE LOSE "I do not have time to play any kind of head games "
Waste of time and space better devoted for talking more of yourself and your interests.
Why is it a waste of time? Because 1) People like that will not avoid you simply because you told them so.
2) Rule number one is rarely wrong!
Its like asking a dishonest person to be honest because you said so.
That, thankfully, was the last hump in your profile and this section ended nicely. Good rebound!!
"First date", though "typical", if that is what you are absolutely more comfy doing and would love to do your very first time meeting, then go with it. But if there is something more fun and laugh filled you'd like to do, go ahead. Spill it!!
Thats my thoughts! | |
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| BlondeBonoBabe
Posted: 4/30/2005 6:31:42 PM | @ BlondeBonoBabe
Like the heading "Good and Plenty", it has certain overtones we guys can appreciate! ha ha. Its NOT a bad thing!
Your picture, all smiling and pleasant, great. Sorry, lose the ones with you in shades. Doesn't work. We can't see your eyes!!
Your "About me", mucho improvo! Good job!
Still liking the "first date" "pass the sniff test" thing! ha ha ha
"Dating Interests", come on now, thinky thinky. Can you come up with 4 interests of yours that you will not find on a majority of other profiles? Perhaps cruise other profiles to get an idea or two? Give it a shot and see what happens.
Thanks, glad I got a new member to the JM fan club! Stickers and booklets will go out next week! lol | |
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| I'll review your profile and give ya some dating advice
Posted: 4/30/2005 7:15:03 PM | | Hey Jack. I want to thank you for the advice. I put a lot of it to good use (and noticed a differece from the get go). You seem to be a natural at this stuff, and I just wanted to thank you for helping all of us. | |
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| I'll review your profile and give ya some dating advice
Posted: 4/30/2005 7:28:46 PM | Hey Jack,
I NEED Help!!! I hardly get any responses to my profile, as it stands, when I send an email, or if I take out a full page ad.. Look it over and give me your advice..I will appreciate...
thanks
Ron | |
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| First ever MULTIPLE reviews!
Posted: 5/1/2005 3:52:34 AM | Hi Jack
Well I took on board all you said and have modified my profile, I think its better than it was, but would be grateful if you could take another look...Thanks | |
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| First ever MULTIPLE reviews!
Posted: 5/1/2005 4:08:45 AM | Eh Vixen,
Aaahhhh, just a much nicer, well rounded profile you have. Goo job. Definite improvement.
Now all you have to do is get 'ta sending out the e-mails to those who catch YOUR attention. Dont wait for folks to send you something. Be proactive, be progressive. Many many many guys really dig that!! | |
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| Just a few review feedback responses
Posted: 5/1/2005 4:19:19 AM | @ Callmejenn
Good to know. I saw your revamps profile. I like your headline. Great job all around!
Still I enjoy that pic of yours, and that smile!
You like guys who play guitar? Hey hey, meet Hellion! Oh sure, he may be a li'l older, but he has his own band! ha ha. Check out his profile.
Well, just a thought. He seems like a good guy too.
Glad you can already tell a diff. Be sure however to be progressive and send out some e-mails to folks who catch your eye too. Guys like that too ya know! ha ha
@onlyoneman
I almost forgot to say "thanks" for your thoughts on my opinions. Yes, I try to keep it constructive, and not destructive or regrading or derogatory. No need to get rude or anything, just expressing my opinion, ya know? So thanks for that. The more "thank you"'s I get, the more I will continue spoutin... I mean sharing my thoughts. ha ha
@Smiley,
Glad to be of service. Anytime you need some input, look to 'ol Jack!
@ Flydutchman, thanks. Glad you like what you read. Stay tuned, your review is coming up and no, you dont get brownie points for the compliment! ha ha ha
@ Salamander,
Keeleys is a nice profile, sure. Stay tuned, a review of hers and yours is on 'da way!! | |
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| First ever MULTIPLE reviews!
Posted: 5/1/2005 4:27:39 AM | | many thanks for the review and feedback. I'm getting more messages already. Got my eye on someone ..lol | |
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| Frosty's Review
Posted: 5/1/2005 4:44:04 AM | Ok, time for more fun.
Frosty is up next!
Hey AJ, whats up? Glad you could drop in, if just for the heck of it.
Your headline, I like it. Original enough. Should catch a few eyes.
Your picture, yeah it is fair. However you are hiding your face behind your hand, in part. Got one to show off your face more? Maybe even with a laugh or a smile of some sort?
Actually, if you took my opinion for whatever it would be worth, use your sixth picture, its the best. It is very "Clintonian"! Tres "Rolling Stone Magaine", I believe that was the magazine he was in a similar pose. Correct me if I am wrong. Anyway, thats the pic tiy should use of the pics you have in your profile. With these two exceptions, lose the rest. The artwork is fine and the Canadian flag nice you are all patriotic and such, but they have no real purpose other than we get you're Canadiam and maybe you appreciate artwork.
I like what you put in your profession, that was good!! lol
"Do you do drugs?"
Unanswered is always ALWAYS assumed as YES. Right or wrong, its the fact of the matter. Wanna change that? I would. Eliminate all doubt... either way.
Your "Dating Interests" suck. You have nothing at all ever in the history of your life that interests you?
Ok perhaps you were misled by the "Dating" part of "Dating Interests".
What most folks do is put in this section things that interests them as a whole. You know, like reading the great American novel, or swimming the English Channel or skydiving nekkid.... oops, but its not about me! ha ha
You get the idea, just put about 8 or 9 things you like to do. The more original the better.
I know you like conversations and discussions, as we have had a few in other forums at POF. There is a great start!
You started your "About me" segment nice and original and most importantly, uniquely you! GREAT job!
But then along comes the second patagraph and shoots it all to hel*. Lose the whole friggin collection of three or four sentences. Makes no sense and comes off a little soapboxy, ya know? Plus never wise to tell someone not to go and judge someone by your own selection of pictures and that they'll come off as stupid if they do. Not a good plan.
The part about you setting up your account, ok I suppose. But please lose the crap about "SO DONT think that you were my "last or lower choice" or that I am a loser who has no friends (for those who test a man by his fans list). I, simply was---not--here."
Way over the top. Tone it down some, jeez!
I applaud your honesty in the next couple of sentences, about one night stands and weekend stands, to paraphrase (feel free to use it). You kept it simple, honest and within two sentences indicated what you sought at POF. Good job!
Lose the "If you disrespect me...." paragraph. Stay away from negatives. Remain focused on the positives as you have through your profile thus far for the most part.
"well,I'm sorta passionate I think"??? Come on guy, either you are or aren't. Either you believe it or don't. Take control, claim it as yours IF you believe it, lose the sentence entirely if you do not or are unsure. This is no place to be unsure, wishy washy or the like. John Kerry has the corner market on that!
( ha ha, I had to write that. If it were any one else, I would not have! ha ha, just razzing and having some fun, ya know?!)
Watch your spelling, a few words got misspelled or otherwise jumbled somehow.
Get rid of in no uncertain terms "Hypocrites" are my number one biggest turn off in life. Close behind that are "cowards". I am neither. I TRY to be a coward; I'm just not very good at it. I'm too afraid to be a coward; figure that one out. ;)"
Your attempt to be cute?
You have a sense of humor, I know ya do. Why not use more of that in the profile? Go with it. Have fun, relax and just run with it. Overall I think your message in this section was above average.
Your "First date" was good enough. Could use some tweaking however. Usually, the ladies love when guys take control. Especially on the first get together. Like it or not, think its fair or not, doesn't matter. We are assigned this role since we came out of the caves and started building houses. Go fig!
Anyway, come up with something you really like to do on a first date. Try not to list sex as one of em, its possibly a real deal breaker. Well, your bluntness and truthfullness in this particular area moreso! ha ha | |
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| CRYS123 review
Posted: 5/1/2005 4:59:45 AM | Crys,
Like the way you have that spelled. Is that short for something?
Your headline,
Very Rupert Holmes-esque. If I may, play this up throughout the rest of your profile. Good headline, but needs a little more umph.
How 'bout "Do you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain?..."
Then the first sentence of your profile would be something like ...
"......If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
I'm the lady you've looked for, write to me, and escape."
Ok ok, I dont actually write peoples profiles for 'em, just 'spressing my opinion. Besides, EVERYONE knows this song but it is not often used at POF as a headline. So you got originality (technically Rupert has that! lol) and eye catching!
Your Pic: GREAT, change nothing! I dare ya to! Great smile, excellent lighting and you aren't too bad on 'da eyes either! Dressed nice and nice background. Great job with the pic! Really. One of the best I have seen I think.
So with the good comes the bad. Your "Dating Interests".
You need more stuff here. Expand "Music". What kind do you like (be more specific).
Same goes for movies.
More interests, try to be original and unique. Things you like to do or a take on certain activities you find fun. What do you do there in NH for fun? Well, other than look at the motorcycles, hit the beach and listen to music as you watch movies. lol
"About me"
Now this section is your real "sales" pitch. This is where you want to put what you like, a conveyance of your general attitude (cup half full or half empty?), a positive message about who you are and what you're like.
Stay away from the negative stuff like what you don't like, what you do not want and such. Thats just a big 'ol waste of time.
Come on, punch it up some. You have a sense of humor too I bet. Be not afraid to use that! Have fun with this, enjoy yourself and loosen up. You'll be great!
"First date"
Be specific. Us guys, well most everyone for that matter, can use all the help and suggestions we can get. ESPECIALLY at first contact be it a friend or friend and working towards a deeper relationship set up.
What would you really like to do? Be specific. Go with it, have fun with it.
Thats my thoughts | |
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