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 girsljustwannahavefun
Joined: 11/16/2010
Msg: 401
Single (never married at all) men over 45Page 17 of 30    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30)
simply not finding the right one
 girsljustwannahavefun
Joined: 11/16/2010
Msg: 402
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 12/29/2011 10:50:15 AM
I like to met men like me never married, dont call me an old maid.I havent found one I want to spend more than a few hours with. I thought for the longest time is was my weight and feeling self concious, lost weight still have "dating issues"
 Miss_ing
Joined: 1/22/2011
Msg: 403
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 12/29/2011 9:15:18 PM
To me single means never married, divorced, separated or anything else. I have women and men friends who are in the their 40's and have never married. I guess there is a pool of us that have dating issues. We are true singles, when we marry it will be for-e-v-e-r with thought of divorce.
 Imclassique
Joined: 12/2/2011
Msg: 404
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 12/29/2011 9:31:26 PM
Take it from me a man who has never married and never had a child or children is not a good catch if you yourself have been married and had children.
The depth of understanding is questionable the degree of commitment is negligable, and the compassion is non existent.

You know what you want , you know what you need, we all need love affection understanding a friend a lover a companion soul mate.

A man who has never tied the knot usually has other priorities, usually associated with his financial matters.

wonderful to find a man who loves extremely, I had a wonderful friendship which stood the test of time.needed no watering or feeding it was simple and still is eternal.
 Imclassique
Joined: 12/2/2011
Msg: 405
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 12/29/2011 9:38:52 PM
fun is a word which can mean a walk in a beautiful park when you are in a relationship which is isolating and controlling, fun can mean watching Tv or having a new dress or hair style when you have not had such in eions.
Fun can be having a scrummy theatre ticket for your birthday rather than a chemist voucher, or nothing at all and feeling sad a isolated because you have not had any happiness, - fun can be doing someting you dont usually do, like a swimmin the ocean, -let alone having a laugh or being friviolous, goodness how we percieve fun, if a rerlationship is intollerable inconsiderate and just awful then something to break the monotony is 100% enlightening and up lifting.
 Castor1963
Joined: 8/23/2010
Msg: 406
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 12/30/2011 6:32:56 PM
We dont want to be single thats why we are on POF lol I have been single for over a year and I really dont like waking up alone but its not my choice!! What I am finding is that people put in the profile that they want love but when it boils down they fall.
 TheBeastHere
Joined: 1/20/2009
Msg: 407
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Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/3/2012 7:31:50 PM
“One of the strongest motives that lead men to art and science is escape from everyday life with its painful crudity and hopeless dreariness. Such men make this cosmos and its construction the pivot point of their emotional life, in order to find the peace and security which they cannot find in the narrow whirlpool of personal experiences.” Albert Einstein


Some of us just immersed ourselves into something that brought true happiness and enjoyed the ride while it lasted.
 kingston46805
Joined: 10/12/2011
Msg: 408
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/5/2012 4:43:36 AM
I never married because I'm an introvert for whom parenting does not sound attractive. Now that I am older, and so are the women who are attracted to me, I feel I might have something to offer someone who is attracted to me and my lifestyle.

As a Catholic, the terms "single" and "divorced" have very different meanings. If I see a profile in which a person is describes herself as "single" with children, I assume she is divorced, and I approach the possibility of contacting her in an entirely different way than I do if the profile says she is "single" or "widowed."
 fire_and_ice_911_64
Joined: 3/5/2010
Msg: 409
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Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/8/2012 1:42:54 AM
I disagree... I am 47. I divorced almost 7 years ago and separated ten years ago. I decided to pursue my career options and attend college. I dated during this time but to say I didn't find anyone "good enough" is such a simply explanation for our complex society. I being a single mom needed to survive. After being married for 23 years giving my all, I had dreams. I did not want to feel selfish and not give enough to that special someone while I was building me. I of course needed to be able to surrender to love emotionally physically and mentally. However, attending college full-time and working plus caring for a child didn't allow for much time to have a full time committed relationship. It is simply not an easy explanation as to why people stay single, but never over assume.
 Toolroom_Trustee
Joined: 10/28/2011
Msg: 410
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/11/2012 11:02:42 AM
"Why do people remain single at all?"

That is a really odd question. I have never seen my life that way. I AM single. Surely the better question is, "Why do people who are single marry?"

Now that I am 48 I can't imagine ever marrying because I will never have children, now, so it doesn't seem relevant.
 gralridr
Joined: 2/21/2011
Msg: 411
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Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/12/2012 8:05:55 PM
You know that is sooooo untrue. I know I am not gay but you know a woman actually told me that. I havent been married because I wanted to find the right woman and she is out there but have not meet yet. African American woman who say that should really know what they are talking about and make sure it is fact.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 412
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/13/2012 2:53:32 AM
Someone needs to walk in my shoes a few weeks before they judge me regarding why I have not been married. However, many people who are divorced or widowed have the mindset that single people are damaged goods, so I avoid them as my idea of fun is not attempting to change their minds. I have met a few men online who said if I had a child I would more marketable, but they needed a sexual reference before they would ever met me. My brother married at 45, and he had more than a few never married women interested in him. He married a woman who was divorced with chilren, and they had a child together. He seemed to never feel complete as a single man without a wife and children.
 imatravelgirl
Joined: 12/16/2011
Msg: 413
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Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/13/2012 8:27:11 AM
Well as a female who is single and 45 I have to say mine was somewhat of a choice. I came from a very conservative background and wasn't allowed to do a lot of things as a teenagerr. Then I met someone at 21 in college who was my first long-term boyfriend and we dated for 7 yrs were engaged to be married and he kept putting off setting at dat. After 2 years of that I broke it off becasue he said he wasnt ready and I moved 900 miles away from Nashville. I worked hard to make something of my career and when my parents got ill I moved back to Nashville. I find it very hard here to meet single men here and those I do meet seem to be, excuse me for being tacky, redneck beer guzzling uneducated men, or they are players and go out once or twice and then never see or hear from them again.

So I love my career, my house, my friends, and althought I'd liked to add a man to those parts of my life, I'm not willing to settled for something that is less that what I want or deserve. I don't need someone and I've been told by several men in the past 15 years that that is my problem. I'm independant and take care of myself and do not "need" a man to do anything other than be my friend and lover. How is that a bad thing? My best guy frined is always saying I'm the perfect woman, love sports, and hanging out, smart and take care of myself. So I say it's men who need to step up and be able to have a partnership That's it.
 AFISHINADO
Joined: 4/19/2010
Msg: 414
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/14/2012 5:39:54 AM
I'm 47 and never been married nor do I have any kids. In my case, I was concentrating on my career, which involved moving around throughout Western Canada during my Twenties. I never spent enough time anywhere to build a relationship that would have led to a walk down the aisle. I finally had enough seniority to live and work in Vancouver, however, it was work, work, work to pay the bills. Eventually, I said enough is enough and I moved back to Saskatchewan. Life outside the rat race is just beginning for me, I hope I can finally find love and settle down with a fantastic lady. That's how "I" ended up over 45 and never married.
 joe1727
Joined: 4/28/2010
Msg: 415
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Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/18/2012 4:24:43 PM
Just because I have never been married does not mean I haven't been involved. It does mean I am one of the lucky ones that didn't marry just to marry and regretted it forever. I do know how to treat a lady and I have all the qualities that go along with that as well. For those who think we are losers and not worth it all I can say is YOUR LOSS. BTW kids are not a problem with me as they seem to come to me and I have some great relationships with kids because they see someone that actually has a life and isn't ****ing about his ex because she took him for everything. Take for what its worth
 NOjadedones
Joined: 5/30/2011
Msg: 416
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Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/20/2012 8:06:16 AM
Because they never met the right one or knew the difference between lust (or honeymoon stage) and love or there totally content.
 mbloof
Joined: 3/23/2010
Msg: 417
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Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/22/2012 8:20:15 AM
I was a bit out of place where I grew up - poor folks in a rich town. Most of the gals did not want to walk, ride a bike or take a bus on a date - you were expected to have a car and pay for everything. I was 22 by the time I could drive and have a car - and had moved away from that place - since I did not know anyone or met anyone, I focused on my work and trying to get ahead in life.

I dated a few times in my 20's, 30's and 40's. Was even engaged once.

Somewhere along the way I ether simply gave up looking for someone to 'complete me' or realized that getting married and having kids might not be the 'wholly grail' of life paths it might of been for our parents, grand parents and great grand parents.

So why am I here on POF?

I'm likely not going to find a partner at work or while shopping and unless I'm expecting "miss right" to magically appear on my doorstep, (which I'm not) I need dating sites like POF to help in the search.

Partnering with someone to enjoy adventures and life with can be fun and rewarding.
 AgentSpectre
Joined: 4/24/2010
Msg: 418
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/22/2012 11:55:40 PM
Sometimes that's just the way it works out. I was engaged long ago and found out the ho was cheating the whole time. Since then haven't really met anyone that can be serious about a LTR.
 1388SmartBlonde
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 419
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/23/2012 12:38:58 AM
Responding to the OP, after my ex came out as gay, I was separated for 4 years before filing for divorce, then waited another 2.5 years while the divorce was finalized. That was 3 years ago. I have not been in a marital relationship for more than 9 years and divorced has negative connotations so I do consider myself single.

Would I ever date anyone my age that has not been married. Absolutely not.. Would I ever date someone my age whose longest relationship was less than 10 years long? Huh-uh. But do I care if they put themselves as Single rather than Divorced? Not one bit.
 Dan0777
Joined: 11/19/2011
Msg: 420
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/23/2012 1:04:44 AM
I never found the right one.

The prejudice around this is a bit silly.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 421
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Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/23/2012 4:04:21 AM
II have a good friend that was 47, never married and hadn't dated a lot. He is tall, thin, but an introvert. He also has crohn's which is under control but may have also made him a little shy. And he didn't really know the type of person he was lookng for.

But at 47 he met a nice lady that is thin, about his age and that had been divorced for a couple of year, they got marred, that was 5 years ago, they are quite happy.

IMO PoF is a dating / hookup site that mainly caters to those under 35, so if you are just here out of kicks it's ok, but if you are in the category of this thread and are serious, then I suggest a paid dating site.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 422
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/23/2012 2:58:40 PM
^^ have done the paid dating site thing and had about the same amount of luck as I have had here. It depends on location, appearance, other attributes, and if someone is willing to accept a never married status without being negative about it.
 Dan0777
Joined: 11/19/2011
Msg: 423
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/23/2012 3:34:14 PM

]I disagree... I am 47. I divorced almost 7 years ago and separated ten years ago. I decided to pursue my career options and attend college. I dated during this time but to say I didn't find anyone "good enough" is such a simply explanation for our complex society. I being a single mom needed to survive. After being married for 23 years giving my all, I had dreams. I did not want to feel selfish and not give enough to that special someone while I was building me. I of course needed to be able to surrender to love emotionally physically and mentally. However, attending college full-time and working plus caring for a child didn't allow for much time to have a full time committed relationship. It is simply not an easy explanation as to why people stay single, but never over assume.


Over assume. That's it. Never do that. It's all too common in so many places.

Things aren't simple unless you live in simple circumstances.
 StellarCHt
Joined: 1/4/2012
Msg: 424
Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/23/2012 4:38:39 PM
I never even thought about it... I put single on my profile not to be decietful, but because I have been divorced for a very long time. It didn't even occur to me that single meant NEVER married.

Now that I think about it though, I don't like divorce, don't like the word, and have many negative associations with that word. I will remain single on my profile, but have no problem letting people know I was married before. And anyone I have ever spoken to who has listed themselves as single were infact divorced also. I never thought twice about it. But I may have to rethink that..... LOL
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 425
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Single (never married at all) men over 45
Posted: 1/23/2012 6:50:26 PM
Before I started reading some threads here I thought Single was single/never married and wondered why there were so many Singles on POF. Never would have dreamed of not listing my true state. The more I think about it, if you're not honest about that, what else are you hiding.
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