| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/21/2007 9:12:27 AM | | my dr. told me when i was in labor to go home and have a nice warm bath and a glass of red wine to ease the contractions until they were closer together. i never drank throughout my pregnancy and thought this was weird, but i have talked to a few woman who have also been told this. i dont think a woman should be drinking heavily or doing shots and out partying while she is pregnant, but perhaps a glass of wine here and there is not as bad as once was thought. | |
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Pucks
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Joined: 10/14/2006
Msg: 152 | |
| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/21/2007 10:44:40 AM | | well i have read that red wine is good for you. This being becuase grapes offer powerful antioxidants. 1 glass is all thats needed though. Moderation to some is several glasses and that is when it is not good for your body. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/21/2007 11:04:12 AM | perhaps she was getting the drink for someone else
perhaps she wasn't pregnant, she was just fat
perhaps she was following a doctor's recommendation to have one drink
perhaps we shouldn't make harsh judgements about people, especially when we don't know their situation. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/22/2007 6:24:57 AM | She did the right thing by not serving the girl, backed up by the Surgeon generals warning. If there is a warning label she cant do anything really to the waitress legally.
"Drinking while pregnant can cause fetal alcohol syndrome, a lifelong condition that can include mental retardation, facial abnormalities, stunted growth, and learning disorders. It can also increase the risk of miscarriage, low birthweight, stillbirth and death in early infancy. When a pregnant woman drinks, alcohol passes swiftly through the placenta to her fetus. In the unborn baby’s immature body, alcohol is broken down much more slowly than in an adult’s body. As a result, the alcohol level of the fetus’s blood can be even higher and can remain elevated longer than that of the mother’s blood." | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/22/2007 9:27:27 AM | i am a human services major...with a minor in addictions...it is NEVER safe to drink ANYTIME during pregnancy and yes one drink no matter when can harm the baby...it is called FETAL ALCOHOL SYNDROM...i was told with my first one that i could drink a glass of wine because of something to do with being anemic...and yeah i did have one maybe once a month before i knew anything about any of this and my son had signs that he possibly has fetal alcohol syndrom...i didnt know any better at that time and now i do.
If she wants to drink it is her right by law but if she was concerned about the baby she wouldnt...i am not perfect and never will claim to be...i smoked during my last pregnancy and my dr's told me that if i stopped completely because of the stress already in my life at that point it would hurt the baby more...my daughter is healthy and fine but i did cut back... | |
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Pucks
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Joined: 10/14/2006
Msg: 156 | |
| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/22/2007 11:10:06 AM | ^^^^have studied this in college as well...But ADHD is also caused by drinking during pregnacy not just FAS.
I am stunned by people saying here that doctors told them to have a drink. Having a hard time believing this. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/22/2007 11:35:03 AM | Women pregnant and drinking do not deserve to have children. The life affects or defects this child could have are massive.
I am sorry that you were almost fired; however I bet that would have been a better move. You showed you have a conscience and that doesn't sell alcohol, which is a huge money maker in bars, that says a lot about you.
When I see all of the parents out there who cannot have children I want to reach out and slap these babes who get knocked up regularly. Look at all the problems in this world that children have to face already.
I am thinking if it were me in that situation, job or no job, I would have called child welfare services. Let them sort out what type of alcohol this "kid" should or should not be drinking. There is no defense for child abuse in the womb.
Tamara | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/22/2007 5:36:41 PM |
Killer*Jill: She did the right thing by not serving the girl, backed up by the Surgeon generals warning.
What a foolish argument. What does the Surgeon General say about smoking - should she stop customers from buying cigarettes as well?
ready4therealthing: i am a human services major...with a minor in addictions...it is NEVER safe to drink ANYTIME during pregnancy and yes one drink no matter when can harm the baby...it is called FETAL ALCOHOL SYNDROM...
despite those amazing credentials, I respectfully disagree. Check this out:
A recent analysis of seven major medical research studies involving over 130,000 pregnancies suggests that consuming two to 14 drinks per week does not increase the risk of giving birth to a child with either malformations or Fetal Alcohol Syndrome.
http://www2.potsdam.edu/hansondj/InTheNews/MedicalReports/GeneralHealth/1040129968.html | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/22/2007 5:49:09 PM | I have done the same thing. I was a****ail waitress in this one place, this women was at least 6 months pregnant and wanted a long island ice tea. I told her that she was crazy and had some nerve to think it was ok for her to drink and harm her baby, and how dare that she couldn't go nine months without drinking for the sake of her baby, that because of her nine months of not drinking, that her baby could live 1-80 years with the consicoince of her stupidity. I tell you that after that, she was giving me the strangest look and left the bar. I hope she didn't go somewhere else and get something.
I can't stand it when they smoke or do any kind of drugs either. It's nine months to go without all that.
Yes, it's the womens choice, but why take the chance of being that 1 in 1 million or whatever it is. The child would have to live with a disability their whole life because the mother couldn't go nine months without a smoke or drink or weed or coke..it's naive and stupidity to think it won't happen to you.
Women will always argue that it's their body..well, it's also the child's life you are putting in danger. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/25/2007 11:00:03 PM | While I red these comments I pry my first letter of the vowels is not working
I 'm adopting 6 children Brothers & Sisters same mom & Dad all have Fetal alcohol Syndrome. My kids are precious however a lot of work is mandatory.
Such as 2 of them cry every day when they wake for reason such as I said good morning time to get up. They all take meds in order to focus so that they can get
dressed and follow the order of tasks brush teeth wash face put on lotion deodorant etc. they don't remember from one moment to next short term memory disorder
they steel and lie for no reason other than poor self-control and impulse poor control. They receive occupational therapy they see neurologist one is deaf one has sickle cell anemia one is in day treatment and he think he is problem free normal. They are developmentally delayed some my 2 years or more.
My wish is that know other children suffer like this lets encourage parents and legislature to change. 
~ Edited ~ YaYa ~ | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/26/2007 4:08:43 AM | | HAK 531 - I know all about being a bar maid, I have done it since the age of 18. I still do it part time, and I would never have the audacity to assume that a woman was damaging her child by ordering one drink at the bar. She may be having a single drink througout her entire pregnancy to celebrate something, or just because she wants to have an occasional glass!!! If she was obviously drunk, that would be another matter - but the op didnt elaborate on this | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/26/2007 5:24:39 AM | I was anemic with my pregnancy, had low blood iron and was generally the least healthy-feeling I have ever been in my life. My Doctor said a half of a very dark beer, stout or port would help. And it did. That was a total of 1/2 of a beer every second day. It also helped with my B - complex vitamins. I am unable to take synthetic vitamin supplements.
I have never been an alcoholic, nor have I been drunk more than maybe 5 times in my entire life, but by having European parents, I have been consuming wine or dark beer with my meals since I was about 10 or so (watered down when I was a kid) It aided digestion, and when I stopped having the single drink with my evening meal every day due to pregnancy (when I found out) my digestion changed. On doctor's orders I put a touch of it back into my diet and my pregnancy problems nearly disappeared.
My son is healthy, strong and advanced physically and cognitively. I followed my doctor's instructions to the dot. 1/2 beer every second day with my largest meal, and never on an empty stomache. It helped my anemia (which would have harmed the fetus, or even killed it without the drop of beer) It helped my absorbtion of nutrients. It made me produce enough breastmilk for both my son and my nephew (whose mother had trouble producing enough.)
I do not condone getting smashed while pregnant, but I know what was best for me and my body to keep my baby healthy. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/26/2007 2:07:30 PM | No no no alchohol is good during pregnancy!! not first second or third trimester. The baby develops different things at different stages in which the alchohol will affect whatever is developing at the given time of consumption. "old school" doctors will say oh a beer here and there or whatever wont hurt the baby...that is so not true. My mom found out the hard way. she had an fas baby.
I would and even if not working in a bar avoid at all costs letting a pregnant woman drink alchohol. 9 out of 10 of those babies born with some form of damage will not remain with their parent...and more often than not are handed off to grandparents, or foster care, or spend their childhoods drugged up cuz the parents cant handle them.
YES...there should be a law to protect an unborn child...those children do not ask to be brought into this world, and by all means those bringing them in should be responsible for taking care of that child/children. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/26/2007 2:39:22 PM | She did the right thing by not serving the girl, backed up by the Surgeon generals warning. If there is a warning label she cant do anything really to the waitress legally.
IMHO that pertains to a pregnant woman who's going to down the entire bottle every night...not one who's out for dinner with family and friends and have the occasional sip here and there....
In any event, I think if this woman was cleary bombed, your co-worker might have an issue.
Doctors here advised my ex during pregnancy that a couple cigarettes or a drink/day wouldn't do our children any harm.
She did both on occasion throughout her pregnancies and I'm happy to say I've got 2 wonderful, healthy kids in training to let dad retire at 45!!! (they might not know it yet, but I figure I'll spring it on them soon!)
I believe there are a few laws out there to protect unborn children, but that's most likely better discussed in another forum!
EDIT
I would and even if not working in a bar avoid at all costs letting a pregnant woman drink alchohol. 9 out of 10 of those babies born with some form of damage will not remain with their parent...and more often than not are handed off to grandparents, or foster care, or spend their childhoods drugged up cuz the parents cant handle them.
Where are you getting those stats from? | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/26/2007 9:57:16 PM | Actually,it is safer to drink while you`re pregnant then when you`re breastfeeding.When I say drink I mean half glass of beer,not shots(all though I didn`t know I was pregnant and drank beer for the first month and a half of my pregnancy,Thank God everything is all right with my baby).
When you`re pregnant and still drinking the placenta is like a shield for your baby,it protects it from a small amount of alcohol.If you breastfeed and drink,alcohol goes straight into the milk.That`s why it`s safer to have a beer during pregnancy.
Realistically though,if you crave a beer during pregnancy buy vitamin B in a health shop and the problem is solved. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/26/2007 10:52:59 PM | A glass of wine or beer every so often isnt such a bad thing. You have to consume A LOT of alchohol for your baby to be born with FAS. There are a lot of things that parents do that aren't "by the books".
People just pass too much judgement on other people.
BUT I personally wouldnt drink while pregnant. And there's nothing wrong with going to a bar while pregnant. It just usually means my pregnant friend is the DD for the night. LOL | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/27/2007 1:00:58 PM | I would and even if not working in a bar avoid at all costs letting a pregnant woman drink alchohol. 9 out of 10 of those babies born with some form of damage will not remain with their parent...and more often than not are handed off to grandparents, or foster care, or spend their childhoods drugged up cuz the parents cant handle them.
Where are you getting those stats from?
I am getting those stats from living it daily, having an fasd child attend pilot projects for teaching children with the damage from drinking while pregnant, attending a vast assortment of seminars and clinics on different advances that have been made pertaining to these children and how to deal with issues that arise... The very first project my son attended was this...24 kids with fasd, 1 with his biological parent...me. The rest were with grandparents and foster parents. Books are one thing, but you really learn from living with it daily.
Oh ya...I had 2 beer before I found out I was pregnant with my son...never touched another drop afterwards. and he was still born with the damage done. Luckily, not all babies that their mother consumed are born with issues...but anything we intake while pregnant does in fact go to the baby. smoke, alchohol and anything else. and the baby does not suffer withdrawls from alchohol or smoke if we stop right then and there... drugs...well that is a different story. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/30/2007 5:56:15 PM |
A glass of wine or beer every so often isnt such a bad thing. You have to consume A LOT of alchohol for your baby to be born with FAS. There are a lot of things that parents do that aren't "by the books".
^^^ That my dear is a fallacy. For some people small quantities have little effect and for others even miniscule amounts cause damage.
So the question could be if in only 5% of all herion users babies are born mentally handicapped should you advocate the mom's "right" to shoot up or err on the side of caution and suggest she stay away from toxins, whether they are alcohol, illicit drug, pesticides or even harsh cleaning agents?
That waitress should get a pat on the back if anything. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 6/30/2007 10:56:58 PM | | Since in most place there is no law regarding mothers placing unborn children at risk by drinking the pregnant woman is within her rights to drink legally but morally since there is currently no way of knowing how much alcohol or at what stages of pregnancy cause what severity of problems the waitress should also be able to refuse to serve the woman on moral grounds. If the expectant mother wishes to drink she should not the waitress to breach her moral values that a childs life is more valuable then the need to have a drink. Another server or place of business can serve the mother or she can drink in the privacy of her own home if she wishes. IMHO | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 7/1/2007 5:11:22 AM | | ^^^^Except that when you live in a free society such as ours, refusing on moral grounds is an impeachment on legal rights. Whether or not you agree with the waitresses' moral standpoint has nothing to do with the legs of the law. Legally, she cannot refuse without some repercussion. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 7/1/2007 1:23:52 PM | Good for you for being a socially responsible person. An expert on Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD) recently told fellow professionals and I that there is no amount or type of alcohol that is safe to an unborn child. None.
With the percentage of kids taking meds for ADHD today or who have other unrelated learning difficulties, I can't understand why any pregnant woman would ever allow herself to have a drink...and that includes stimulants such as coffee. IMHO, we are not only creating "a life" but "life potential" - it's our duty to maximise our unborn child's chances.
IMHO, one issue (amongst many) with having a law per se to protect the unborn is that it would lead us to legally acknowledge that it is not only a foetus but a "human being"...once law recognizes this, it would without a doubt become murder to have an abortion under "any" circumstances. I won't get into that one but I strongly feel that pregnant women shouldn't drink - regardless of what their doctors say. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 7/6/2007 3:10:49 PM |
^^^^Except that when you live in a free society such as ours, refusing on moral grounds is an impeachment on legal rights. Whether or not you agree with the waitresses' moral standpoint has nothing to do with the legs of the law. Legally, she cannot refuse without some repercussion.
Not true Limestone. We live in the same province so you should know that entry or service can be denied at the owner or their representatives discretion. You can be refused service for swearing and asked to leave, for wearing the "wrong" clothes, or being pregnant and the bar is within their rights and the law. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 7/6/2007 3:21:26 PM |
I am getting those stats from living it daily,
I'm sorry, but that's a pantload.
Oh ya...I had 2 beer before I found out I was pregnant with my son...never touched another drop afterwards. and he was still born with the damage done.
...ever heard of genetics? Some things we can't help...much like me winning the lottery or finding the ever elusive 'last' woman! It's a roll of the dice.
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 7/6/2007 3:40:11 PM | "Should there be a law to protect the unborn child?"
Absolutly right there OP. How bout we start by making abortion illigal. | |
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| pregnant and drinking
Posted: 7/6/2007 5:39:15 PM |
hiwayman: Absolutly right there OP. How bout we start by making abortion illigal.
or better yet, how about a law that prevents people like you from imposing your own beliefs on others and letting them make their own deeply personal decisions.
If a 12 year old girl was raped by her father and got pregnant, is it really ethical to make her keep it? Whether it is ethical or not, these decisions should not be made by nosy outsiders like us, but by the ones closest involved in the situation.
As for the OP, it has been shown numerous times in this thread that doctors will prescribe a drink here and there to a pregnant woman, and doctors also often say that the occasional drink doesn't hurt the baby. There's probably experts out there who also say that pregnant women should never drink any at all, but even if they do this isn't a "my doctor knows better than your doctor" argument. A waitress who sees one woman, whom may be pregnant, order one drink should not impose her will on that her because that waitress doesn't have enough information to make an informed decision. The waitress in this case made a decision from ignorance. No pat on the back for her. | |
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