| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/19/2008 7:27:01 AM | | I think I have said this before. A lot of what you project out to the world reflects back on you. I have more "strangers" smile and say Hi to me than ever before. I have started conversations with people whom I have never met. Some react positively and like to talk, others not so much. They are entitled to react whichever way suits them. Are we entitled to judge them based on their reaction? I think not. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/19/2008 7:35:01 AM | ^^^^^^^^agree. I have learned for myself as stubborn as I am that the world does reflect on you what you project out. That is why I have changed my ways. There are just some people who don't want to talk, and that is their choice.
Where I disagree is this. " Are we entitled to judge them based on their reaction? I think not. ". The reason I disagree is because I work with a lady and when I first started their we had a great conversation about the Seahawks as she is an avid football fan just like me. I wasn't and am not looking to date her or anything, but she just won't converse with hardly anybody. So I think I do have the right to judge that she is just not a happy person. There is never a smile, always a frown. So yes I can judge that she is a unhappy person. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/19/2008 7:58:05 AM | | The right to judge, now there is a thread of its own. Personally, I know everyone judges even unintentionally. But think how this world would be if we did not judge each other and left judgement up to our creator. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/19/2008 8:10:21 AM | | I would love to see what it would be like. Since my change 3 months ago, everytime I start to say something negative or judge about somebody else I try to tell myself to knock it off and shut up. REALLY!!!, it is tough, but I am working on it and trying to work with my roommate who may be the worst I have seen or heard about judging, and it all has to do with insecurity. Sorry to get off topic susu | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/19/2008 8:17:52 AM | | Not so off topic. I think that you have to dig into these forums to get to the crux of the issue. In this case, I do not think there are issues with women in seattle or men for that matter. The issue lies in the perceptions and in turn the judgements. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/19/2008 8:58:13 AM |
The only problem I have with Seattle is the people, the women in particular. Its really a shame that in such a beautiful and inviting place like this people can be so cold and flaky. I've been here for 5 years now and haven't met any true friends, just acquaintances and associates from work.
I am a recent transplant from *gasp* California (y'all don't beat up on me okay). In my year of being here I have made true friends, have dated and have found that I love it here. I love the laid back lifestyle, I love the mountains and I really love that I can now enjoy working and playing in an area where my kids won't have to choose a gang affiliation and I don't have to choose between paying the electrical bill and feeding my kids.
I have met a lot of wonderful people here - honest, down-to-earth, laid back, funny as heck. But that's my experience. I learned that what I put in is what I get back.
But that's just my experience. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/19/2008 9:33:06 AM | How funny - this thread was started over a year ago by someone who I don't even think is on the website anymore and still we are chewing this topic up!
I agree with MissNoWhere - you get as good as you give. And having lived in just about every major quarter of the U.S. (NE, SE, SW, NW) - I have to say I LOVE this area - I love the people, I love their perceived "flaky-ness," I love the laidback, do what you want attitude and I totally love the space to get away from the rat race and hug a tree or two.
I do remember being a single 30-something, living in downtown Seattle and trying to meet men of substance. They seemed to be few and far between until I realized I was looking in the wrong places and going about it the wrong way. Look for the thing that gives you joy and focus on that - you will find the like-minded folks you are meant to be with and maybe even find your perfect mate. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/19/2008 9:34:07 AM |
It just seems to me that a lot of folks around here actually go out of their way NOT to talk to folks. Heck, I'm actually shocked when someone on the street strikes up a conversation with me, and that's unusual for me. Erm, uhm, guilty?!
For me anyway, I live and work downtown...walk to work across the city everyday...most folks that start talking to me randomly are bit...how shall I say...."off" . So, I am sure that influences how I react to everyone!
I generally just put my earphones in, and enjoy the fresh air as I walk or take the bus. It helps keep the madness (of a different kind) at bay...but heck, that's exactly the stuff that insulates us...I look around on the street and the bus etc, and half of everyone has earphones in!
For me, and I don't know if it's a product of the culture or just my own quirkiness...I like to only interact with folks when I want to! otherwise, I enjoy ignoring the rest of the world. I think I have mastered the blank look/facade...So, I feel very comfortable amongst the rest of the same insular behavior...
I remember taking a personality test a while back...a Meyers Briggs bit I think...I got mixed results re Introvert/Extrovert...And I totally get it...I am very into my own world often when 'out there'...but get me in a comfortable group, and I am excessively chatty, very assertive.
People are complex. It doesn't make us horrible unhappy people because we don't smile at everyone that passes us by...that could be dangerous;)
And for whatever reason, folks always come up to me to ask how to get somewhere...even with headphones on! LOL...but I stop take them out, smile, and direct them on where they need to go! I am a nice person, after all:) | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/19/2008 2:20:43 PM | One of my main clients is downtown as well. I'm there everyday, and especially given the recent weather, I love it.
A lot of what people are saying is 100% correct, it's all about making yourself approachable, and inviting. In a lot of ways I think I'm lucky as my job forces me to speak to a LOT of different people everyday, and I don't get a chance to "turn it off". The bad part is it's me fixing their issues which can be emotionally draining, so sometimes I'm just not 100%
As for the not smiling at people as you walk down the street, I completely disagree. A smile costs you nothing to give, makes the people who receive it happy, and tends to be quite infectious. Give it a go. ;) | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/19/2008 9:58:27 PM | Well, I don't live in Seattle, but close enough.
Elisa, I've also taken Meyers Briggs a few times for school and found that I am on the cusp of Introvert/Extrovert myself. One slightly different answer skews the results one way or another. I am a Gemini, so maybe that's it? Kidding of course. I believe it's a sign of balance and also of the ability to be fluid of personality.
Most of my work/career has been in areas where I am forced to be an extrovert. In my personal life, I tend to be introverted. I do smile at people, but do not randomly talk to others as I pass them on the street. I will occasionally strike up a conversation while waiting in line or a similar situation. I would not ever walk around with ear buds in. I like hearing the sounds of life around me and prefer not to block it out. Besides I don't even own an iPod! | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 7/20/2008 6:56:09 AM | | Funny you say that about the Meyers Briggs, I too am so close to the middle that it takes just one answer to go one way or the other with the extrovert / introvert thing. I like my alone time at home but tend to be very outgoing at work. I think most people tend to go one way or the other depending on the situation. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/5/2008 7:58:52 PM | I am so glad to have read what was written here.
I posted a comment about my experiences online and it was a Passive Aggressive nightmare from every angry woman under the planet.
Now, only one was from the Seattle area, so it seemed to be more of a nature of this site.
I haven't experienced what you have when I met women at a store or in person, but I moved over to the Eastside of Seattle and have found the women that I've spoken to to be kind, sweet and amazingly communicative.
Many Women tend to believe that just the act of communicating means you want to sleep with them, which is sad.
And then when they DO go out with someone who's a complete loser, they complain about his "only wanting sex".. and the cycle continues.
Just be a friend and take things slow. The ones with class, respect and an IQ will show up.. They have for me so far. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/10/2008 11:30:36 AM | Hi Darkromeo~
I had to comment on this one.
I am from Seattle ~ have moved to Montana.
I was there for 17 years and you are so RIGHT on.
Women have done a HUGE dis~service to men and to them selves in a lot of ways.
I am for women's rights. With in reason! However I see SO many women that have taken the balls from their men and then they get all pissy because he wont do what guys are supposed to.
I was raised to take care of my man and he will take care of you. That is old school and isn't correct as I found out that didn't work either. I have been single for 9 years.
I was married to the love of my life for 16 years. We had a great time and the sex was out of this world. However he got started skirt chasing ~just for the thrill of it he said. We joined a swingers club and it wasn't for me. I did my best but it was not fixable. It wasn't because I had his balls in my Fendi Bag!
I like being a woman ~ I love a strong man~ one that has his own mind, can do his own thing and knows when he comes home I will meet him with a kiss, dinner and some quite time after a long day.
A joyful and peaceful home is my gift to myself ~and the man that holds my hart~
Teach me your sports, what it is you like to do and why you like them. I wont bore you with the things I do when you are not with me~ however you will see I sew, I have new curtains in the kitchen. You will smell I bake there is your fave cookies in the cookie jar and fresh bread in the oven. I will make you a special lunch and surprise you at work with it and I get YOU for my dessert.
I have to say I hope you find some one close to what you are looking for and good luck in the Seattle area. I didn't find a strong , loving male there!
I am still looking for the man that likes his women to be a LADY...
This is a fact for me that most single moms are WOMEN and NOT ladies.. and they start early to emasculate the boys . In fact so many men have been raised by strong overbearing women they don't know HOW to have a mind of there own..
Any way just my point of view and I wish you luck | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/12/2008 9:07:37 PM | I have found a fantastic lady with curly hair, that I cannot get enough of. So as far as I am concerned, Seattle ok Snohomish ladies are fantastic. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/12/2008 11:02:25 PM | I think I dated Meyers Briggs. She was a little flaky but also an intorvert/extrovert. She never smiled except when I smiled at her. I just learned to smile a lot, be nice to her, and to listen. We got along great until she me Mr. Mick Ingham. She left me for him.
Oh well, Life goes on. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/14/2008 7:57:51 AM | Here you go:
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/pacificnw/2005/0213/cover.html
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=roC_nsdyi1I
This may be why. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/15/2008 9:35:00 AM | | Sebring~ that's interesting info. I had to laugh when I saw myself in parts of the article. Dating some of us Seattle women isn't for the faint of heart. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/16/2008 7:26:00 AM | Very interesting article.
I am havign troubles with fish men .. men on here.. breaking dates.. or simply not following through.
It's .. oh yeah , well, I had to go outof town and now I am on vacation. I do really wan tto meet you. Weekend after weekend. Those people who 'go away' never have tiem or write back after they go away.
I feel used an djerked around.
I think this is off-topic. I apologize. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/16/2008 11:18:28 AM | | Cathya, Actually, there is another thread for this under Dating Experiences. But that being said, do not let these types of experiences affect your self esteem or how you feel about yourself. Usually, it is their problem, not yours. Do not take ownership of it. Let it be what it is and move on. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/16/2008 7:32:55 PM | This is funny. I am originally from here, but moved out to MT for a bit. Yeah, in comparision to the "midwest' (which I totally think MT resembles although Montanans don't think so) people aren't as friendly here. Its just the way it is. I dont know much about the east coast except I understand that generally people from there are more direct, and sometimes that can come off as aggressiveness.
Hmmm. Not that that has to be a negative thing. Yeah. Seattle is uptight. Its not spacious and sunny enough here, maybe? But at least Seattle has singles. Try living in Missoula. There are absolutely no single people there. Almost everyone out there has been together for five years and drives a suburu with a dog riding in the back. Seriously. And if they are single, they all have crazy ex's. Every guy I went out with had a looney ex still calling him. Probably trying to get custody of the dog.
Personally, when a guy approaches me and says HI DO YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND?? I feel a little cornered. Unless hes super hot.
Its true.
A better line to use is some kind of witty remark. If you can make a girl laugh or even smile at you, you have a better chance. Just a bit of advice. | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/18/2008 10:50:47 PM | Seattle is very uptight and a mjority of the people here are unwilling to venture outside of their clique of close knit friends which I find extremely weird.
There are alot of singles here but it's like pulling teeth trying to set a date up or to even approach one w/o the fear of being laughed at and being told no or some other akward scenario.
This city sucks as far as dating goes.... | |
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| Women In Seattle
Posted: 8/19/2008 8:51:05 AM | I really haven't noticed a difference in women in one state over another, but do accept the fact we have cultural differences afoot.
You're on a dating site and there are others besides this. These are the greatest thing since sliced bread. Why would you talk to a stranger when you can look them over on a dating site and test the waters with a flirt or email?
As far as the hottie doing the dissapearing act on the dating site, I'd suggest she's getting lots of play and while emailing you was also emailing several others seeing who would emerge from the pack of interest and it wasn't you. If you're going to try to date the best looking women expect the most competion because that's where most of the men head. Having said that, never let someone's looks interfere with trying. In the end we're all looking for a good match and those other men you're going up against may be real good looking but dorks. | |
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